Artemis Fowl. The Lost Colony af-5

by Eoin Colfer

  'Can we focus here, everyone? You may have noticed that my project is in crisis.'

  Gaspard Paradizo had just about had it with Minerva's project. So far, he had indulged her to the tune of one and a half million euros, but now his entire estate had been trashed. It really was too much.

  'Minerva, cherie,' he said, smoothing back his silver hair. 'I think we need to take a step back from this. Perhaps quit while we're not too far behind.'

  'Quit, Papa? Quit? While Artemis Fowl conducts a parallel project? I think not.'

  Gaspard spoke again, this time with a little iron in his tone. 'You think not, Minerva?'

  Minerva blushed. 'Sorry, Papa. I am infuriated, that's all. This Irish boy swans in here with his troops, and just like that, ruins all our work. It is unbearable, no?'

  Gaspard was seated, as they all were, at a wrought-iron table on the rear patio overlooking the pool. He pushed back his chair and circled the table to his daughter's seat. From her vantage point there was a spectacular view over the wooded gorge and down into Antibes. Nobody was very interested in the view on this evening.

  'I think, Minerva,' he said, hunkering down beside her, 'that we have gone too far in this matter. There are otherworldly forces at work here.

  Danger follows these creatures, and I can no longer allow you to place yourself, or others, in harm's way. We fought a noble fight, and I am so proud of you that my heart may burst, but now this must become a government matter.'

  'It can't, Papa,' said Minerva petulantly. 'We have no records. No sources. Nothing. All our computer files and disks were destroyed.They even drilled the safe and burned everything in it. I think Artemis Fowl crashed Google and Yahoo. It's hopeless. How would it look, a little girl turning up at the Department of Defence wittering on about monsters in the basement? I need evidence.'

  Gaspard stood, his knees cracking. 'Evidence, little one? These are not criminals. I watched you talk with our visitor. He was alert, intelligent,

  he had done nothing wrong. He was not an animal. It is one thing to present the Nobel Committee with proof of an invasion through time, but quite another to hound innocent sentient creatures.'

  'But, Papa!' Minerva pleaded. 'One more try. I need a month to rebuild my time tunnel model, then I can make a materialization prediction.'

  Gaspard kissed his daughter on the forehead. 'Look into your heart, my little genius. What does it tell you to do?'

  Minerva scowled. 'Look into my heart? Honestly, Papa, I am not a Care Bear.'

  'Please, cherie,' said her father. 'You know I love you, and I respect your genius, but just for once, couldn't we go with the pony option?

  Couldn't I just get Justin Timber-guy to play at your birthday party?'

  Minerva fumed for several moments, but she knew Papa was right. She had no business detaining intelligent creatures. It was cruelty, nothing less. Especially when they intended no harm. But she could not just give up. Minerva silently resolved that Artemis Fowl would be her next project. She would find out all about the Irish boy, and what he knew of demons.

  'Very well, Papa,' she sighed. 'For you, I will forego my Nobel Prize. This year, at any rate.'

  Next year will be different, she thought. When I know what Artemis Fowl knows. There are whole worlds just beyond my grasp.

  Gaspard embraced his daughter warmly. 'Good. It is for the best.'

  The surgeon returned to his seat.

  'Now. Mister Soto: damage report.'

  The Spanish security chief consulted his clipboard.

  'I have only a preliminary report, Monsieur Paradizo. I suspect we will be finding damage for many weeks. The vehicles are completely destroyed. Thankfully we do have war-zone insurance so we should have new cars within five working days. There is shrapnel in the pool.

  One piece pierced the skimmer and the wall, so we have a leak and no filtration. I know a man in Tourrettes sur Loup. Very reasonable and he can keep his mouth shut.'

  'How about the men?'

  Soto shook his head. 'I don't know what they hit us with. Some kind of ray gun. Like Martians. Anyway, most of the men are up and about. A few have headaches. No other side effects except for Thierry, who has spent the past half an hour in the toilet. We hear the odd scream. .'

  Suddenly Billy Kong emerged from his mumbling daydream, slamming his palm on to the glass-topped iron table.

  'No. This will not do. Absolutely not. I need another demon.'

  Gaspard frowned. 'That unhappy experiment is over. I should never have allowed it. I was blinded by pride and ambition. There will be no more demons in this house.'

  'Unacceptable,' said Kong, as though he were the employer and not the employee. 'Eric's work must be completed. I owe him that much.'

  'Now listen here, Mister,' said Soto sternly. 'What you find unacceptable is hardly an issue. You and your men were subcontracted to do a job, and that job does not include pronouncements on what is acceptable and what is not.'

  As he spoke, Kong checked his hair in the small mirror he carried everywhere.

  'You need to understand a few things, Paradizo. First, you are not in charge here. Not really. Not since my men and I joined your little group. Second, I don't generally work on this side of the law. My speciality is taking whatever I want by any means necessary. I only signed on for babysitting duty because I owe these demons a little payback. A lot of payback actually. I know little Minerva just wanted to take photos of her guests and ask them a lot of psych questions, but I have my own plan for them. Something a little more painful.'

  Gaspard turned his head towards Soto.

  'Mister Soto. Do you have a response to this outrageous statement?'

  'I do indeed,' blustered Juan Soto. 'How dare you speak to Monsieur Paradizo in this fashion. You are an employee here, that is all. As a matter of fact, you are no longer an employee. Your contract is terminated. You have one hour to vacate your room and be off the premises.'

  Billy Kong's grin was as dangerous as a shark's. 'Or else what?'

  'Or else my guards will remove you. I would remind you that there are only four men in your group and five times that number in mine.'

  Kong winked at him. 'Perhaps. But my four are the best.'

  He flipped his jacket lapel to reveal a small clip-on microphone.

  'I am moving up the schedule,' he said into the mike. 'Open the horse.'

  Soto was puzzled.

  What was this idiot talking about? Horses?

  'Where did you get that microphone? Is that from the strongbox?

  Channels are to be kept clear for official transmissions.'

  But Minerva caught the Iliad reference. Opening the horse could only refer to the Wooden Horse of Troy. Kong had planted traitors in the camp.

  'Papa,' she said urgently. 'We must leave.'

  'Leave? This is my house. I have agreed to almost everything you have asked of me, cherie, but this is ridiculous. .'

  Minerva pushed back her chair, racing round the table.

  'Please, Papa. We are in danger here.'

  Soto tutted. 'Mademoiselle is in no danger. My men will protect you.

  Perhaps the strain of the day has made you irritable. Maybe you should take a nap.'

  Minerva scowled in frustration. 'Can't you see what is happening here?

  Mister Kong has given a signal to his men. Possibly they are already in charge. He has come among us as a wolf in sheep's clothing.'

  Gaspard Paradizo was well aware of his daughter's intelligence.

  'Soto? Is this possible?'

  'Impossible!' declared Juan Soto, but behind his enraged blushes was a tinge of pallor. Something about Kong's grinning calmness unnerved him. And, truth be told, he was not quite the soldier that his resume declared him to be. True, he had spent a year with the Spanish peacekeeping force in Namibia, but he'd been attached to a journalist for the entire tour and had never participated in any action. He had got by in this job with mere bluster and a rudimentary knowledge of weaponry and tactic
s. But if someone were to come along who actually knew what he was talking about. .

  Soto reached to his belt, snicking off a walkie-talkie.

  'Impossible,' he repeated. 'But to reassure you, I will double the guard and instruct my team to be on alert.' He clicked the 'Talk' button.

  'Report in pairs. From the top.'

  Soto released the button, filling the air with static. The empty hiss seemed more ominous than a ghost's howl. This went on for several seconds. Soto tried valiantly to maintain a jaunty confidence, but was betrayed by a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead. 'Equipment malfunction,' he said weakly.

  Billy Kong shook his head.

  'Two shots,' he said into his lapel mike.

  Barely a second later, two sharp cracks echoed across the estate.

  Kong grinned. 'Confirmation,' he said. 'I'm in control here.'

  Soto had often wondered how he would react if faced with actual danger. Earlier, when he had believed that they were under siege, he had panicked slightly, but followed procedure. This was different.

  Soto went for his gun. A practised pistol man could do this without looking down. Soto was not practised enough. By the time he glanced towards his holster, Kong had already leaped on to the table and knocked Soto unconscious.

  The security chief keeled over backwards with a dainty sigh.

  Kong sat atop the table, elbows resting on knees.

  'I need that demon back,' he said, casually drawing a stiletto blade from a secret pocket in the sleeve of his jacket. 'How do we find him?'

  Gaspard Paradizo smothered Minerva in his arms. Protecting every inch of his daughter.

  'If you hurt her, Kong. .'

  Billy Kong rolled his eyes. 'No time for negotiations, Doctor.'

  He twirled the blade between his fingertips, then snapped his wrist,

  flicking the stiletto at Gaspard. The weapon's handle thunked against the doctor's forehead, and he fell away from Minerva like a discarded coat.

  Minerva knelt, cradling her father's head.

  'Papa? Wake up Papa.' For a moment she was a little girl, then her intellect kicked in. She checked her father's pulse and tapped the point of impact with her index and middle fingers.

  'You are lucky, Mister Kong, not to be facing a murder charge.'

  Kong shrugged. 'I've faced them before. It's amazing how easy it is to elude the authorities. It costs exactly ten thousand dollars. Three for the face job, two for new papers and five for a really good hacker to create a computer past for you.'

  'Nevertheless, one more half-revolution of your blade and my father would be dead, and not merely unconscious.'

  Kong pulled a second blade from his sleeve pocket. 'There's still time.

  Now, tell me how we go about finding our little friend.'

  Minerva stood facing Kong, her fists clenched defiantly.

  'Listen to me, idiot. That demon is gone. I have no doubt that his benefactors plucked the silver bullet from his leg as soon as they had him in the car. He is back on his island. Forget about him.'

  Kong frowned. 'It makes sense. That's what I would do. Well, OK then, when is the next materialization?'

  Minerva should have been terrified. Her ability to do anything besides witter and sob should have deserted her. After all, her father was lying unconscious, and the man who had put him in that state was sitting on her patio table, brandishing a knife. But Minerva Paradizo was no ordinary twelve-year-old. She had always displayed remarkable composure in times of stress. So, even though she was scared, Minerva was more than capable of communicating her scorn to Billy Kong.

  'Where have you been for the past thirty minutes?' she asked, then clicked her fingers. 'Of course — asleep. I believe you people call it neutralized. And by a tiny demoness too. Well let me fill you in on what's happened. Our entire operation has been neutralized. I have no research, no calculations and no subject. I am starting from scratch. In fact, I wish I was starting from scratch. Starting from scratch would be a dream come true. Last time I was handed the time-tunnel calculations; this time I have to work them out by myself. Now don't get me wrong, I could do it. I am a genius after all, but it will take at least seventeen months. At the very least. Comprenez-vous, Monsieur Kong?'

  Billy Kong understood all right. He understood that this little pain in the rear was trying to blind him with science.

  'Seventeen months, eh? How long if you had some incentive?'

  'Incentive won't change the laws of science.'

  Kong leaped down from the table, landing soundlessly on the balls of his feet. 'I thought that was your speciality — changing the laws of science. Wasn't this project all about proving how every other scientist in the world is a dummy, except you?'

  'It's not that simple. .'

  Kong began flipping his knife, catching it without so much as a glance at the blade. End over end it twirled, a silver fan in the air. Hypnotic.

  'I'm making it simple. I think you can get me a demon, and I think you can do it in less than seventeen months. So, here's what I am going to do.' He leaned down and heaved Juan Soto's chair upright. The security chief slumped forward on to the table.

  'I am going to hurt Mister Soto. Simple as that. There is nothing you can do to stop that happening. This is a demonstration of my earnestness. It connects you with the reality of your situation. And then you know I mean business. So, after that, you start talking. And if you don't start talking, then we move on to lucky contestant number two.'

  Minerva had no doubt that contestant number two was her father.

  'Please, Mister Kong, there is no need for any of this. I am telling you the truth.'

  'Oh, it's please now, is it?' said Kong in mock surprise. 'And Mister Kong too. What happened to idiot and moron?'

  'Don't kill him. He's a nice man. He has a family.'

  Kong grabbed a bunch of Soto's hair, yanking his head back. The chief's Adam's apple stuck out like a plum.

  'He's an incompetent,' snarled Kong. 'Look how easily your demon escaped. See how simple it was for me to take over.

  'Let him live,' pleaded Minerva. 'My father has money.' Kong sighed.

  'You're just not getting it, are you? For a smart girl you can be pretty stupid a lot of the time. I don't want money. I want a demon. Now stop talking and pay attention. There is no point in trying to negotiate.'

  Minerva's heart sank as she realized just how far out of her depth she actually was. In less than an hour she had crossed over to a world of darkness and cruelty. And her own arrogance had led her to it.

  'Please,' she said. She struggled to maintain her composure. 'Please.'

  Kong adjusted his grip on the knife. 'Don't look away now, little girl. Watch and remember who's boss.'

  Minerva could not avert her eyes. Her gaze was trapped by this terrible tableau. It was like a scene from a scary movie, complete with its own soundtrack.

  Minerva frowned. Real life did not have a soundtrack. There was music coming from somewhere.

  The somewhere proved to be Kong's trouser pocket. His polyphonic phone was playing 'TheToreador Song' from Carmen. Kong pulled the phone from his pocket.

  'Who is this?' he snapped.

  'My name is not important,' said a youthful voice. 'The important thing is that I have something you want.'

  'How did you get this number?'

  'I have a friend,' replied the mystery caller. 'He knows all the numbers. Now, to business. I believe you're in the market for a demon?'

  Minutes earlier Butler had pulled off the motorway at the airport exit, and crammed himself into the back seat beside Artemis and Holly. They had watched the drama unfold in the Chateau Paradizo on their tiny laptop.

  Artemis gripped his knees tight. 'I can't allow this. I won't allow it.'

  Holly placed a hand over his. 'We have no choice, Artemis. We're clear now. This is not our fight. I can't risk exposing Number One.'

  Artemis's frown cut a furrow from his hairline to the bridge of his nose.
<
br />   'I know. Of course. But, still, how can this not be my fight?' He glanced sharply at Butler. 'Will Kong kill that man?'

  'Without a doubt,' replied the bodyguard. 'In his mind, it's already done.'

  Artemis rubbed his eyes, suddenly fatigued. 'I am responsible, indirectly. I can't have a man's death on my conscience. Holly, you do what you have to do, but I need to save those people.'

  'Conscience,' said No.1. 'What a lovely word. The sh in the middle.'

  It was plain that the imp was not actually listening to the conversation, just picking up on certain words. The incongruity of this simple statement made Artemis look across. His eyes rested for a moment on No.1 's chest markings. And suddenly he knew where he had seen them before. A plan hit him like a bolt of lightning.

  'Holly, do you trust me?'

  Holly groaned. 'Artemis, don't ask me that. I just know one of your outrageous plans is coming.'

  'Do you trust me?'

  'Yes,' Holly sighed. 'I do. More than anyone.'

  'Well then, trust me to get us all out of this. I will explain later.'

  Holly was torn. This decision could affect the rest of her life, and the imp's too. And the effect could be to shorten them dramatically.

  'OK, Artemis. But I'll be watching.'

  Artemis spoke into his ring-phone. 'Foaly, can you put me through to Mister Kong's mobile phone.'

  'Not a problem,' replied the centaur from Section 8 HQ. 'But it's going to be the last thing I do for you. Sool has tracked my line out. In thirty seconds I'm going to be shut down, and you'll be on your own.'

  'I understand. Put me through.'

  Butler gripped Artemis's shoulder. 'If you call him, then he has the upper hand. Kong will want to choose where to meet.'

  'I know where we should meet. I just have to convince Mister Kong that the rendezvous point is his idea.' Artemis closed his fist, covering the phone. 'Quiet. It's ringing.'

  'Who is this?' snapped Kong.

  'My name is not important,' said Artemis. 'The important thing is that I have something you want.'