Why I'm Yours

by S. Moose

  “What is it, buddy?” I ask.

  He tugs a little harder. As I lean in, he, too, presses a kiss to my cheek, mirroring his father’s movement, and I close my eyes for just a moment, trying to rein in my emotions.

  It’s adorable and without a doubt one of the very sweetest things I have ever witnessed in my life. The action only cements his place in my heart. I love him, and in this moment, I know I’ll always love Drew. It’s still new, but even if he and I don’t work out, Drew’s given me hope again. That will forever be remembered.

  Throughout dinner and dessert, Aimee gets a small glimpse of the two guys who are winning over my heart. She laughs at Drew and entertains Dawson. It feels good, having them both here, at our place. Drew looks comfortable and easily holds my hand and kisses my cheek and forehead. We’re not over the top in showing our affection, but it’s nice, how close we are.

  At times, I catch her giving me that knowing smile just before she goes back to whatever it is that Dawson conned her into doing.

  When Aimee leaves the table with Dawson, chasing him around the apartment, neither of them paying any attention, Drew cups my face and kisses me hard. I moan into his mouth, my fingers in his hair, wanting and needing more.

  “Wow,” I whisper against his lips.

  He kisses the tip of my nose before sitting back on his chair and feeds me a piece of his cookie. The smile he has makes me melt. I’m clenching my thighs together to ease the distracting sensation. The walls around me are slowly falling, making it hard for me to resist him and almost impossible to continue at the slow pace I've insisted on.

  25

  Drew

  It’s getting late. Dawson’s fallen asleep on Reagan’s lap, and she’s sleeping with her head resting on my shoulder. Both are lightly snoring, and I don’t mind. Aimee’s on the other couch, staring at us, and I take the opportunity to talk to her. To get to know her since she’s Reagan’s best friend.

  “Be careful with her,” she says to me before I get a chance to say anything.

  “I need you to understand that I’d never hurt her. I’m not a player or man-whore. When I’m in it with someone, I’m all in. I care very deeply for her, and I love how she is with Dawson. You don’t have to worry.”

  This seems to put her at ease.

  “I know. I can tell you really care about her. Ever since you came into her life, even when you guys hated each other, she’s had a different light to her. It’s like you’re bringing back the old Reagan.”

  “Old Reagan?”

  She nods. “Something happened to her toward the end of our senior year at college.” She sighs, rubbing her face, and leans forward on the couch, hugging her knees. “She’s my best friend. We’ve been there for each other since middle school, when I first moved to town. There was this brightness to her, and everyone loved her. She was innocent though, ya know?”

  I nod, fully listening and wondering what happened.

  “Then, came college. We were roommates, and I honestly don’t think I would’ve passed my classes if I didn’t have her. We went to a party the week of our last finals, and after that…I don’t know.” She sighs again. “She turned away from everyone and isolated herself. You know, she missed her own graduation. By the time I got back from graduation, there was money and a note on the counter. All it said was, she was sorry and had to leave and that, one day, she’d come back and be okay.”

  “That sounds terrible. And you don’t know what happened?”

  “No. I don’t push her either. It’s like Reagan’s suffering alone, but now that you have come into her life and are making her smile, I think whatever demons she has are going away. So, please, please, if this is some game, then leave, and I’ll make sure she’s okay.”

  “I appreciate you looking out for her and caring about her. I assure you, I like her a lot.” I pause and look at the woman who is slowly beginning to own me.

  I thought I understood love and commitment. With Jennifer, we meshed together, and since we had known each other for years, it made sense to be with her. I loved her and wanted to spend my life with her. Once Dawson came, I thought we’d be complete. We’d be whole. Once things started changing, so did my love. It turned from romantic to friendly, and that’s where my heart is now when it comes to her.

  When I look at Reagan or even think about her, everything makes sense. Things are clearer, and I want to be a better man for her. For Dawson.

  As I hold her close to my body, I realize how different she makes me feel. How every kiss ignites passion and pure desire of need and want. With every touch and kiss, I pour every bit of emotion I have into her. For the first time, I feel comfortable and at ease.

  I pull her close, lean down, and press my lips on top of her head.

  “Aw, you two.”

  I turn and smile at Aimee before turning to the TV. I think I should probably get going since it’s getting to be almost eleven, and Dawson’s going to be miserable and tired for school.

  Before I’m able to move, Reagan grabs my shirt and snuggles closer to me.

  “I’d like for you and Dawson to stay with me tonight.”

  “Are you sure?” I swallow the doubt forming and hope she doesn’t think she has to do this. “It’s okay, baby. Sander’s waiting for my call, and I don’t mind leaving.”

  “Please don’t,” she mutters as she holds me tighter. “I’m not ready to let you escape. I’d much rather have the both of you here with me.”

  Instead of saying anything, I get up and carry Dawson in my arms. Reagan stretches and groggily walks in front of me. I follow her, feeling a sense of belonging, like I should be doing this very thing with her. We walk inside her bedroom.

  I look around, taking in the space that is as elegant as the woman before me. Very Reagan. There’s a queen-size bed facing the door with a nightstand next to the bed and a dresser against the wall. In the dark, I can see she has some pictures scattered, and a sign that reads, She believed she could, so she did. Just those words alone make me think of what she could have gone through. It makes me wonder if she’ll ever share with me the obstacles she had to face.

  “I’ll be right back. Need to change and brush my teeth, but please, make yourself comfortable. And, no, you don’t need to sleep on the floor. Dawson will be between us, so it’s okay.”

  I can’t find the words, so I simply nod and place Dawson in the middle of the bed. After stripping out of my shirt, I think about putting it back on, but then I toss it on the floor and climb in next to my son.

  When Reagan reemerges, she comes into bed and turns on her side, so she’s facing us. Dawson’s back is toward me, and he snuggles in close to her, obviously feeling as secure with her as I do. I like this. I like this a lot.

  “I’m so tired.” She quietly laughs. “I’d love to talk, but we have a busy day tomorrow, and I think we both need sleep.” She yawns just before her nose crinkles up in the cutest way. “I’ll see you in the morning, handsome. Sweet dreams.”

  “Good night, baby.”

  I reach over and pull her hand into mine. She lets me, and we stay like this all night, that simple contact bringing me more peace than I have ever felt.

  The next morning, after having Sander pick us up and take us back to my apartment, I’m in my office, ready to go to Dawson’s spelling bee contest. He’s nervous, and I feel like a shitty dad for not reviewing the words with him last night.

  Making sure I have everything, I let Brett, my new assistant, know where I’m off to and to call me if I’m needed.

  “Go!” He smiles and rushes me out. “Plus, I have that sexy man AKA Remy to help me if I need it.”

  He smiles again, and I have to shake my head. I’m glad I have him and not some doe-eyed woman assisting me.

  “Remember, call me if anything comes up, Brett.”

  “Got it, sweets.” He winks and blows me a kiss.

  “Brett, you’re on day two,” I remind him.

  He waves me off and sits down to
answer the phone.

  Go, he mouths.

  I do, but I make it to Reagan’s office. She’s furiously typing, and I love how focused she looks.

  “I’ll try to make it,” she says as she continues typing. “Sorry. Miranda has me reviewing back-to-back reports and finalizing her trip to California. I’m so, so sorry if I don’t make it today. I got Dawson something.”

  “You didn’t have to.”

  She turns and gives me that beautiful smile I love so much. “But I did, so make sure you give it to him.”

  She points at an envelope on her desk, and I grab it while leaning over to kiss her bye.

  With my briefcase, I run through the office, take the elevator down to the lobby, and rush outside to meet Sander. We have twenty minutes to make it to Dawson’s school by twelve thirty, and it’s the middle of the lunch rush hour.

  “Don’t worry, Mr. Powers. I got you. My sister-in-law’s a teacher at the school and she says you’re all set.”

  “Thank you, Sander. It’ll just be us today so I can’t be late. Reagan, Remy, and Jennifer won’t be attending, and my parents are securing a very important deal.”

  “Little man knows everyone’s rooting for him. That boy has a heart of gold.”

  “He does,” I agree.

  This morning, when we dropped him off and I promised I’d be there, he said it would be okay if I missed it. He understood that no one else would be coming, and it broke my heart. This is going to be a major contest for him. His first. My son’s first contest, and he won’t have a big audience to cheer him on.

  My phone vibrates, and it’s a text from Jennifer.

  Jennifer: I’m extending my Nashville trip for a month. Gotta stay down here.

  Me: Did you at least talk to Dawson and wish him luck?

  Jennifer: For?

  Me: His spelling bee contest. Remember, he’s top of his class.

  Jennifer: Wow. I didn’t know he was that good of a speller. Cool. Give him my love and kisses. XO.

  I don’t respond. I put my phone away. There are times I wish she’d leave us be and walk away from Dawson. He deserves better.

  Sander pulls up to the front of the school and I rush in, heading toward the auditorium and see that Sander’s sister-in-law did reserve seats in the front row for me. I’m not sure why there are so many seats when it’ll just be me and Sander today. When I sit down, I look at my watch, and the contest will start in two minutes. Right before Mrs. Clawson, the principal of the school, brings the mic to her lips, I hear a door close, and people rushing in. I hate when people are late. It’s rude, and it shows a lack of respect for the event. When I turn around to see the idiots, I’m wide-eyed, and I take back everything I said about people being late.

  “Hi, handsome.” Reagan leans down and kisses me on the cheek while my parents, Remy, and Sander take their seats.

  “What’s going on?” I whisper.

  “We rearranged the day and wanted to surprise you.” I notice Reagan waving to Sander and he gives her a wink. “Miranda got everything she needed ahead of time, so Vincent expedited the deal, and Remy put Brett in charge. He’s in his glory right now, telling people what to do and checking to make sure works being done. Remy and I put Sander in charge with the seats and here we are.”

  “Oh, hush, you two,” my mom says a little too loudly. “My grandson’s going to kick booty today.”

  “Mom,” I hiss.

  I see Remy and my dad shake their heads, laughing.

  After Mrs. Clawson finishes her speech, the contest starts, and Dawson’s face lights up when he sees all of us here, cheering him on.

  Dawson starts strong. A few children misspell their words, and it seems to be between Dawson and another student.

  “Please spell acquire.”

  I’m on the edge of my seat, watching Dawson and admiring my son’s ability to strive to be the best.

  He walks up to the microphone and pauses, looking as if he’s saying the word in his head, and starts to spell the word. “A-c-q-u-i-r-e.”

  “Correct.”

  “Yes! Good job, Dawson!” I stand and cheer.

  Some parents look at me, and Reagan pulls me down to my chair.

  “Correct. Melody, please spell ominous.”

  “Um. Definition, please.”

  “Sure. A clue or hint that something bad might happen.”

  “Oh. Okay. Ominous. O-h-m-i-n-o-u-s.”

  “I’m sorry, Melody. That is wrong.”

  Melody walks back to her seat and hugs Dawson.

  When Dawson is back to the microphone, the announcer gives him his final word.

  Dawson says, “P-t-e-r-o-d-a-c-t-y-l.”

  “Correct.”

  “You did it!”

  Our row stands to cheer for my son.

  "Congratulations, Dawson. You're the winner of the spelling bee." She hands him a trophy and he holds it high over his head.

  “You did it!” I yell again, holding out my arms.

  Dawson rushes off the stage and runs toward me to give me a hug, and thanks everyone for coming.

  “Dude, you are the man!” Remy holds up his hand for a high five.

  “Thanks, Uncle Remy. Thank you, everyone, for coming. Grandpa, I thought you had an important deal to close?”

  “I did, rascal, but we wouldn’t have missed your big day for anything.”

  Dawson’s face beams, and I kiss the top of his head.

  “Dad!” he whisper-shouts. “Please. I’m not a baby. I’m a man.”

  A what?

  “Thank you for coming. I need to talk to Melody.”

  What?

  “Bye, Dad. Bye, Reagan. Bye, Grandma and Grandpa. Bye, Uncle Remy. Bye Sander!”

  I watch Dawson hug Melody. My six-year-old son. Hugging a girl.

  My nerves are shot, and I see myself in him.

  Oh, fuck.

  “Come on, handsome. Let him be.”

  I turn and look at Reagan before looking to find Dawson. “That’s my mini me. I’m so fucked.”

  “Karma, son.” My dad slaps my shoulder. “Karma.”

  26

  Reagan

  Miranda and Vincent insist we all go out to dinner to celebrate Dawson winning. It’s nice to be at dinner with Drew’s family and to feel included. I adore the Powers. They’re a wonderful family, always thinking of others. Most importantly, they love and support one another.

  No one would guess that, no more than two months ago, Drew and I were nowhere near cordial. In fact, he drove me insane, and on most days, I wanted to poison his coffee.

  Okay, so not poison but a little liquid blowout might have been fun.

  Now, we’re here, sharing stolen kisses, while his family sits around, talking and laughing. They’re including me in their conversation and even though I know his family likes me, it still feels nice to feel accepted.

  Miranda even refers to me as her future daughter-in-law with an added wink while introducing me to the waiter at the restaurant. I try to hide my blush, but Drew tilts my chin with his finger, and there, in front of everyone, he gently kisses me.

  We’re seated, and Drew places his hand on my thigh, just beneath the hem of the tablecloth. Just that simple touch alone grounds me and makes me feel safe all over again. I’ve grown quite fond of that feeling.

  “What are your plans for Saturday evening?” he asks, leaning in closer. The warmth of his breath blows over my neck and shoulder.

  I turn to him, bringing our lips closer together, only he doesn’t pull back. A trace of a smile tugs at his lips as his hand slides over my thigh in a comforting manner.

  “What are we doing on Saturday?” I ask, knowing that, whatever he has planned, I’m in. As long as I’m with him, I’m where I want to be.

  “Powers Financial sponsors a charity event at the Crowne Plaza,” he whispers as he lifts his hand and trails his finger over my jaw. “Remy and I have been chosen this year to represent the company. I’d like you to join us.”

/>   I hear his words, but mixed with the way his finger still skims over my cheek and his thumb pressing against my chin, I’m lost in the sensation.

  “I want you on my arm, Reagan. I want to dance with you and show every other person in that room who I belong to.”

  I refocus on him and forget that we’re not alone. Drew has the ability to make me do this often.

  “Yes,” I say, “I’d love to.”

  “Okay, you two.” It’s Remy who brings both Drew and me back to the group. “You can socialize with the rest of us, too.”

  Drew narrows his eyes at him, as if to say, back off, and he smiles wide. They have this way of taunting one another that reminds me more of two brothers. It’s actually quite humorous to watch.

  Drew, of course, doesn’t let Remy’s words stop him from showing me attention throughout dinner. He continues to sneak in a touch here and a flirtatious word there. He makes me feel as if I’m the most important person in the room. I notice that Vincent’s the same with Miranda, and I realize just where Drew gets his attentiveness.

  Dinner’s perfect, and the company is even better.

  Our drive across town, toward my apartment, afterward, I’ll admit is my favorite part. Drew holds me close, his fingers delicately tracing my arm and along my shoulder the entire way.

  That movement alone makes the commute fly by.

  Sander slows to a stop in front of my apartment building, and Drew leans in, telling him something I can’t quite hear.

  Dawson’s fast asleep in the backseat of the Cadillac Escalade. A blue blanket curled up around him makes it hard to see his chubby little cheeks. I reach back and touch his calf, leaning over to kiss his forehead.

  I face forward and notice Drew carefully watching my movements. Without warning, he leans in and cups my jaw, bringing his lips to mine. The kiss isn’t a hungry one but more gentle and reassuring.

  “I know I tell you this over and over, but you’re unbelievably amazing. The way you are with him…” He lets his words fade as he kisses me once more before pulling back and resting his forehead to mine. “We’re lucky to have you.”