by Ryan Michele
He pulls my hair so hard my neck angles down in an unusual way. Again, no pain, only pressure.
“Know it was mine. The other three, I made them use condoms. Not me. When I pushed through that virgin barrier, I wanted you filled with only me. Wanted you to remember who you belonged to. Then I find out you killed my baby!” The pressure becomes more, and now I do cry out. “Had my guys track you and found you after you murdered my baby! Bitch, you’re going to pay … every fucking way possible.”
Bile rises up my throat, burning as I try to push it down. This man hurt me in more ways than just physical, and I hate him. Hate what he and his men did to me. I can still feel the pain of when he took me, can still feel the guys holding me down by my arms and legs while I screamed out, trying to fight back. Every damn detail of what he did to me is etched on my soul for eternity.
My baby. I fight back the tears thinking of the life that grew inside of me for such a short time.
Pain spears through my heart, and the emptiness I feel in my stomach grows.
Innocent. I can’t fight the tears as one falls out of the corner of my eye and rolls down my cheek.
A sharp pain comes to my side, and then wetness falls from my body.
“Shouldn’t have givin’ you so much. Want you to feel this.”
“Please don’t, JK,” I whisper, just as another slice of pain comes. Then another. And another.
It would be better if I were dead.
21
Deke
“Right,” Cooper says into the phone then hangs it up. “Footage outside Austyn’s house shows her getting tasered. Two men carrying her off, the car leading right to JK’s place.”
“You’re fuckin’ shittin’ me,” I growl.
“We’re pullin’ off. Need to brief Dad and GT.”
We pull off to the side of the road and get out, relaying the information.
The guilt weighs heavily on me. I brought this to them. Fuck, I brought this to her.
“Knock that shit off right now. He’s doin’ this, not you,” my father says, surprising me.
He’s blamed me for so long that this is unreal to me. Him not thinking this is my fault. That I didn’t lead all of this shit to the door of my family, even though it’s the last thing I ever wanted. And he doesn’t blame me? I can’t help wondering: what changed? Why now?
I told him everything. He knows I didn’t just walk out on my family, that I had reasons. That’s what changed.
I only nod, unable to say anything else. I don’t feel the nod one bit. It’s been so long since my father said anything remotely positive to me that it seeps down into my soul, feeding that empty place that’s been there for years.
Cruz starts making calls, rerouting all the other MCs to JK’s place.
Ryker runs his hand through his hair, looking up at the sky. “This isn’t fuckin’ happenin’,” he says to whoever’s up above. There’s no way to respond to it, but he repeats it over and over again.
“We go in hot once they get here—all of us. We go in and get my girl. Don’t give a fuck who we take out, just make sure it isn’t you or the guys takin’ our backs. Brothers are all on their way,” Cruz orders, hopping onto his bike and moving.
As much as the guilt rides me, I push it down, needing to focus on what needs to be done to get Austyn away from that fucker. Knowing what he did to me, I hate to even think what he could be doing to her.
We set up post outside the place. Buzz shows up a few minutes behind us with computer equipment that he, Tug, and his twin, Breaker, are linking up. Bikes start rolling in from other clubs, none of who I know, so I stay back and let them do their thing.
My hands twitch to get in there. Ryker is about ready to come out of his skin with each second that ticks by. Cruz, Cooper, and Nox are keeping a leash on it, but barely. Nox is close to the breaking point. I did catch myself twice going up to him, putting my hand on his shoulder, and giving it a squeeze.
He was fine with this and seemed to let out a breath every time. It’s a start at least.
“Go time. In hot; take out everyone. No survivors. We’ll do clean up after,” Cruz orders.
We move hard and fast. The land the house is on is vast with guards everywhere. Nox and I take out two, while Cooper and Ryker take out the others. The trees around the place give good cover, keeping us on serious alert. Buzz is at the computer, watching the cameras to give us information, but that won’t do us much good if it’s a sneak attack.
Several other guys come onto our path, but we’re able to neutralize them.
There’s no doubt the place knows they’re under fire, unless they’re underground because of the bullets flying. Therefore, we need to move fast.
I look at my phone that has a map of the place that Buzz sent to all of us. We have the lower left quad, so we make our way there.
The walls are stucco, which makes the light shine off them—not conducive to this ambush—but we make it work.
Not looking to see if people have a gun or not, we take them out, knowing that if we miss just one, we could be finished. The females from earlier on the cameras are nowhere in sight, only men with guns. JK’s army.
I hear shots off in the distance and hope like hell they’re ours.
Cooper leads us down a corridor, and we end up taking out four more men. Ryker and Nox take turns opening doors, while I take their backs and keep a lookout behind us.
This, being in the fold with these men, knowing they have my back as much as I have theirs, this is family. Having the cut on my back, being with the guys who will one day be my brothers. Being in the fold, where I wanted to be, only not for this reason.
Three more men go down by my hand. I don’t give the least bit of fuck.
“Locked!” Cooper calls out, causing the hair on the back of my neck to rise.
Ryker doesn’t wait. He kicks the door hard, splintering it as it crashes open. More shots, and then Nox calls out in pain.
“Graze!” he yells, still shooting.
As I make my way into the room, my stomach twists at the sight before me. Austyn’s arms are tied above her head, and her legs are attached by ropes to pegs in the floor. Her body hangs limply as blood oozes out of her sides. The way the blood is stained, it looks as though she was lying down at one time. Fuck, what did they do to her?
“Help,” she croaks out. As lethargic as she is, either she lost a fuck lot of blood, or he doped her up.
Two men off to the side set off shots. Pain slices through my shoulder, the burning fierce, but I aim and take one of the assholes out. Cooper takes the other as Ryker runs up to Austyn, pulling a knife out of his pocket and cutting the rope from Austyn’s arms.
Moving closer, I see Austyn’s face is torn up. She is covered in cuts, blood, and it looks like her nose is broken. Red and purple marks mar her face. It all causes the anger to burn inside me, especially because there’s no JK in sight.
“You got her? I’m goin’ to find that fucker,” I growl, hearing Austyn whimper in Ryker’s arms.
“I’m in,” Cooper calls out, just as his phone rings.
He swipes it. “Yeah?” His eyes grow round. “Everyone out! Bomb!”
Ryker takes off like a shot. Nox is behind him, but limping. Cooper scoops him up in a fireman’s hold as we run with everything we have, going through the same corridors as before, anger pumping through me and wanting to escape.
The sunlight hits us, and everything explodes.
22
Rylie
“You do realize you were shot, right?” Anger bubbles at my man who won’t stay the fuck down.
“Three days ago, Rylie. I’m good.”
Even though the doc said he’d be fine, I still don’t like it. Funny how I saw him fight like hell and get busted up, yet a bullet wound to my man … No, not liking that one little bit. Only a few inches over and it would have hit his heart. I’d be visiting his damn grave, just like my parents.
“Need to go talk to Austyn.”
Placing my hand on his shoulder, I gentle my voice. “She’s still not seeing anyone, except her mom and dad. They have her barricaded at their house, recovering.”
The woman had multiple stab wounds; two that punctured organs that needed to be stitched up. She had blood transfusions and had to have the drugs pumped from her body. Surprisingly, they didn’t keep her in the hospital long. Princess and Cruz took her home, and now she refuses to see anyone. It’s been said that Ryker is camped out on their porch, and even with Cruz telling him to go home, he hasn’t budged.
To me, this is quite interesting. Ryker, the man who talked about getting into my panties the first time we met, didn’t seem to have a soft spot for anyone. But he does her. It’s not my business, but with being around the club the past few days, word gets around fast.
“They’ll let me see her.”
“Why don’t you go see your mom upstairs? She didn’t want to leave until you were feeling better.”
That woman comes off as a soft person, but damn, when she heard her boy was shot, she turned into a lioness, ready to rip anyone and everyone apart. Took everything out of her, and she ended up passing out. But damn, it was fierce.
“Fuck, I hate that she’s doin’ chemo, then hangin’ out here.”
“Babe, do you really think she’s gonna leave you?”
Deke rolls his neck side to side. “Fuck.”
He gets up from the bed we’ve been sharing. I’ve tried to lie on the edge, giving him more room with his shoulder, but he always pulls me to him so my head rests on his chest.
We’ve been staying at the clubhouse because JK got away. Deke didn’t give me all the details, just said we had to stay at the clubhouse for a while, that it was safer. I’m down with safe. Lord knows I don’t need knives inside my body.
“Come on; let’s go up and see Mom.”
Brewer barks as we leave him in the room and shut the door. He’s made quite a home here in the clubhouse. He loves to run outside in the open areas.
Entering the room, Emery runs up to her brother and wraps her arms around him. His back gives a slight jolt in pain, but he gives nothing else away as he wraps his good arm around his sister.
She’s so small against him. I love seeing how much they love each other. Deke deserves this. Deserves his family.
“I’m fine. Everyone’s fine,” he tells her, rubbing her back.
“Austyn,” she croaks out, her body shaking.
Casey, otherwise known as Angel, sits on the bed with tears in her eyes, watching her two children. I move away from Deke and go to her.
“Are you okay?”
She reaches over and grabs my hand. Her grip isn’t very strong, and her face looks as if she’s aged years in the past week. The chemo is doing a number on her.
“All things considered, wonderful. Got my two babies in the same room and his woman. Only thing better would be my man here. It’s great.”
This woman’s strength is admirable. In the face of odds, all she sees are the positives of having her kids together. I’m happy that she has that.
Deke moves to the side of the bed with his sister tucked under his arm. “Wish you could go home and recover, Ma.”
“This is home, Deke. Anywhere my kids and family are, is home.”
My heart hurts at remembering my parents. They loved me, cared for me, and their time was cut short. Deke is getting his time back. So, while I hurt for my loss, I’m also happy for my man.
“JK and his crew are off radar,” Deke tells me, which is something I’ve been dreading. “Talked to Cruz. He’s sending everyone home. Can stay here if we want, but JK hasn’t shown up in a week and a half now, and Buzz has every computer program running to find him. From what he’s found so far, we know he left the state.”
“Considering I’ve been off work for the last ten days, I really need to get back to my life, Deke. Schade’s been cool, but I need to get back. Princess has been good, too, with you shot and all. Still, it’s time to get back to life.”
He pulls me tightly to his warm, hard, naked body. “Gun on you all the time. You go nowhere without letting me know where you are, and I take you to work and pick you up.”
I begin to refuse, but he squeezes me harder. “You’re my woman; I protect you. Gotta give me this or I’ll have to tie your ass to the bed.”
A smile lifts my lips. “For a little while. I’m not big on being told what to do, Deke. You know this.”
“But you’ll do it because you know I’m keepin’ you safe.”
I let out a breath. “Right.”
“Next, you gotta choice. You either go back to your place, clean it up, and stay there with me. Or, clean it up, sell it, and move in with me.”
“You want me to move in with you?” Inside, I jump for joy like a kid on a sugar high. Holy shit, I care so damn much about this man.
“Ry, we’re together every night. You haven’t left my side for over a week. Fuck yeah, I want you livin’ with me.”
I lift my head, resting it on my hand, my cocked elbow on the mattress, and look down at my man. I want nothing more than to live with him, wake up with him, be with him. “Yeah.”
“Yeah.” He pulls me down to his lips and takes them hard yet sensually.
Deke’s movements aren’t frantic like our times in the past. They are slow and meticulous. Each brush of his fingertips on the skin of my arms sends goose bumps throughout my flesh. I clutch his neck, holding him to me, afraid he could possibly move away. This connection between us in this moment can’t break.
It feels too powerful. Too knowing. Too important.
He continues to take, and I continue to give, rubbing my thumbs along his jaw as we dance with our mouths in rhythm together.
He sucks on my bottom lip, watching me as he does so. Then he rests his elbows on either side of my head, enclosing me, which I love.
Lying skin to skin, his warmth infuses me. He lifts my knee and wraps it around his hip, still kissing me leisurely, like he has all the time in the world and nothing else matters.
He pulls away and looks deeply into my eyes, conveying so much without a word. Then Deke rubs his nose along mine, and I close my eyes, enjoying the small gesture.
“Want you raw, skin to skin. I’m clean. You on the pill?”
“Yeah,” I breathe, wanting to feel all of him, too. Just him and me. Nothing else in the world exists.
He adjusts his body, his cock right at my opening, but he doesn’t press in. No, instead, he tortures me, slipping the head inside and stilling, then kissing me. With slow, meticulous movements of his hips, he enters me inch by inch by inch. Time stays still as an unbreakable bond forms between us with each of his movements.
I don’t move my hands from his neck, wanting everything this is so badly I’m afraid I could lose it if I do move. He’s never given me a reason, but losing my parents marked me. Deke, I don’t think I could come back from that.
I love this man.
Deke continues to lazily move in and out of me, sliding all the way out to the tip, and then back in repeatedly. He stops to watch my eyes, then kisses me once again. The burn is slow building, but the intensity is so heightened, and the roll between my legs smolders.
“Deke,” I whisper, my eyes begging him to move, take me over that edge, give me what I need, what he needs, what we need.
“So fuckin’ beautiful, bombshell, and fuckin’ mine.” Only then does his thrusts increase, but not like normal. These are still way tamed, yet no less intent on serving their purpose.
The spiraling curl hits. I dig my nails into his neck as my back arches off the bed. I feel Deke’s cock grow. Then I feel it twitch as he leashes his come inside my body.
We stare into each other’s eyes, knowing this was more. So much more.
“That wasn’t just fucking,” I breathe up at my man.
A lazy smirk comes across his lips. “No, baby, it wasn’t.” He drops his lips to mine again.
There isn�
��t anywhere I’d rather be than in this man’s arms.
23
Deke
We walk into my childhood home four days later, not feeling good vibes. Tensions are already high with the club.
The brothers have brought me into the fold as if I’ve belonged there all my life. Even with my shoulder, though, I’ve had bathroom duty and those fuckers are nasty. However, I couldn’t help smiling, even as I cleaned the shit.
That’s saying a lot because the mood around the club is bad. JK can’t be found, and I’ve been helping put in new security systems in the brothers’ houses. Buzz says they are state of the art, and then he gave some tech-babble that I had no clue what the fuck he was talking about.
We’ve been searching, too, asking around and trying to find JK, but he’s gone ghost. Full-out no trace of him whatsoever.
It’s putting everyone on edge. We’re all aware.
Mom’s hanging in there well. Meanwhile, Cruz says we need a family meeting and that Austyn won’t be in attendance. She’s home with Emery, the only person besides her mom and dad she’ll let see her. She won’t let me in. She came to me at a very difficult time, and now she’s avoiding me, along with everyone else. I’ll give her time. It may be a short amount of time, but I’ll give it.
“Oh, my boy!” my grandma, known as Ma in the club, says, coming up and grabbing each side of my face, pulling me down to her and kissing me on the cheek. “When they told me you were here, I made Pops start the drive back. They didn’t tell me until last week, those fools, saying we were on vacation and needed it. I can’t believe they let all this go down without calling us.”
Ma turns and glares at my father and Cruz, but it doesn’t faze them in the least.
“Good to see ya, Ma.” I pull Rylie beside me. “This is my woman, Rylie.”
“Oh, honey.” Ma grabs Rylie, pulling her into a hug. “So happy to meet you.”
