Never a Bride

by Denise Hunter

  One good thing about this all-fired predicament—no one knew how he felt. He’d done a fine job at putting on an act. Why, he could be a player in one of those traveling theater shows he’d once seen. Yep, he’d fooled them all.

  He flung the pitchfork to the ground in a rare display of temper. No one knew his dilemma, and that meant he had no one in whom he could confide. No friend’s advice would be forthcoming about what he should do when his brother and sister-in-law returned from their honeymoon. No advice about how he was supposed to see Cassy at every meal, every day for the rest of his life, and keep from wanting her. No advice on how to live with the fact that he loved his brother’s wife.

  How immoral could he get? Loving the woman his brother had just married.

  Luke dropped onto a bale of hay and covered his face with shaking hands. What am I gonna do, God? You’ve got to get me out of this. How am I supposed to live here, so close to the woman I love, and keep my thoughts pure? I feel like I’ve betrayed Caleb in the worst way, and he doesn’t even know it. Help me, Lord.

  Luke sat there for some time neglecting his chores. Finally, his rumbling stomach convinced him it was time for breakfast. He stopped by the pump on his way and splashed cold water on his face before going in to face Elizabeth and Jane.

  ❧

  Jane had just placed the platter of sausages on the table when she heard the front door open, then slam shut. Luke rounded the corner a moment later. “Sorry, didn’t mean to slam the door.” He gave a crooked, almost contrite, grin. “Good morning, Jane.”

  “Morning. Breakfast is ready.”

  Elizabeth and Luke took their seats while Jane finished setting the food on the table. She surveyed the situation as she worked. Luke and Elizabeth sat across from each other, so she could sit at either end of the table, beside Elizabeth or beside Luke. Elizabeth made the decision easy.

  “You can sit by me, Jane. That’s where Caleb usually sits.”

  Jane took her seat and, after they joined hands, Luke offered the grace. Elizabeth did most of the talking throughout the meal, and Luke was unusually quiet. Jane wondered if Cassy was on his mind. She’d never seen him so withdrawn.

  Luke finished his meal before Jane and Elizabeth, then excused himself. “The food was great, Jane. I’ll be out in the northern pastures today, so I won’t be back for lunch.” Luke crammed his black hat onto his head. “I’ll just grab some apples and bread from the kitchen.”

  Luke disappeared into the kitchen and returned a few minutes later with a bulging leather bag. “See you at supper. I usually get back around six o’clock.”

  “I wonder what’s on his mind?” Elizabeth said after he left. “I don’t think I’ve seen him so quiet since Mama and Papa died.”

  “I was wondering about that myself.”

  “Maybe it has something to do with Caleb getting married.”

  Jane feared that Elizabeth was a little too close to the truth. “He’s probably just having a bad morning.”

  Elizabeth giggled. “Luke? He doesn’t have bad mornings. That’s Caleb! You should see him in the morning. He won’t even talk until he’s had two cups of coffee, and even after that, you’ll only get a grunt!”

  “Sounds as if I’m lucky to be leaving when they return.”

  The day passed quickly, with Elizabeth showing her what needed to be done. Obviously, Esther did all the work a mother would normally do: cooking, cleaning, laundry, sewing, weeding. They were all familiar tasks, and Jane had no trouble taking over once Elizabeth showed her where things were kept.

  While Jane worked, Elizabeth played nearby or helped with the task. Weeding was the chore that seemed most neglected, so Jane started on that immediately after breakfast. Later in the day, she cleaned the floors upstairs and down until they gleamed.

  Elizabeth tried to persuade her to go for a ride, but Jane made it clear—riding horses was something she did not do! Ever since she’d seen little Billy Earnheart fall to his death all those years ago, she’d been terrified of the creatures. After Elizabeth insisted that Luke wouldn’t mind, Jane finally agreed to let the young girl take a ride alone.

  By the time supper rolled around, Jane was ready for a rest but knew she had to get supper on the table. A visit to the root cellar turned up pork and potatoes, which she prepared with Elizabeth’s help. There was enough bread for the next couple days, but she knew she would have to make more soon.

  As she worked, she planned how she would fill a plate and excuse herself so that she could eat alone. She didn’t mind Elizabeth’s company. Luke, however, was an aggravation to be avoided, and if she managed to escape supper tonight, she would set the standard for the following days.

  While Jane placed the food on the table, Luke came in and washed up at the kitchen basin. When he and Elizabeth seated themselves, Jane took her filled plate from on top of the stove and turned to address the brother and sister. “Have a nice supper. I’ll be in the cottage if you need me.”

  Elizabeth turned to look at Jane and, across from Elizabeth, Luke froze. An awkward moment of silence ensued before Luke spoke. “Why, you can eat right here with us, Jane. I wouldn’t dream of sending you off to eat all by yourself.” Luke’s face wore a crooked grin, and there were little crinkles at the corners of his eyes.

  “Oh, it’s no bother,” Jane said. “Elizabeth told me Esther took her supper home to eat, so I thought I’d do the same.”

  Luke laughed. “Yes, well, Esther had a husband at home to feed. Now unless you’re secretly married and hiding a husband in that cottage, you may as well just take a seat with us.”

  Jane pursed her lips and moved to take a seat. Vexing man! Now she had to stay. Luke said the prayer, but Jane heard none of it. No one had ever irritated her as much as this man. Why, he’d even had the gall to poke fun at her for being unmarried. Not everyone was appealing to the eye and able to attract the opposite sex. But what would he know about that? He with his shiny brown hair and dimpled grin. He may be single still, but his unmarried state was obviously his choice.

  When the prayer ended, Jane stabbed at her pork and proceeded to absentmindedly pick at the meal she had prepared. Conversation flowed between Luke and Elizabeth, but Jane’s responses were limited to single words and short phrases. As soon as she could graciously do so, she excused herself from the table and began the cleanup process. Elizabeth joined her a moment later and, when the kitchen was put back in order, Jane said good night and escaped to the cottage.

  five

  Thursday and Friday passed with relative ease. Jane did familiar chores and got into a comfortable routine. On Saturday morning she made bread, then sewed a tear in one of Elizabeth’s dresses while the bread was rising. After kneading the dough, she changed the bedding.

  Elizabeth had gone out to play, and Jane was carrying the bedding down the stairs when she heard a wagon pull into the yard. Curious to see who the visitor was, Jane dropped the bedding by the foot of the stairs and went to the door. She didn’t need a looking glass to know she was in no condition for company. Her hair, which was tied in a knot at her neck, had come loose and hung in strings around her face. She was wearing her frumpiest gray gown, which had no adornment whatsoever, and a dingy apron, dusted with flour.

  Jane opened the door to see a very pregnant woman awkwardly alighting from a buckboard with the help of an older woman. She recognized the first woman as Sara McClain, whom she had spoken with a time or two at church. The other woman, Hetty, helped on the ranch.

  Even her advanced pregnancy could not conceal Sara’s beauty. Her hair on this hot, June day was worn up, but the curly ends of her hair hung from the top of her head, creating a halo effect. Her appearance made Jane feel dowdy. Jane stepped onto the porch as the two women approached and pinned a polite smile to her face.

  Sara smiled in return. “Good afternoon, Jane,” she said as she mounted the porch steps. “You remember Hetty, don’t you?”

  Jane extended a hand. “Yes, I do. Good afternoon.”<
br />
  Hetty’s warm smile extended to her eyes. “How are you getting along here at the Reileys’, dear?”

  “Just fine, thank you.” Jane wished Elizabeth were nearby to fill the silence. “Would you like to come in for a cup of tea or lemonade?”

  “Lemonade sounds wonderful.” Sara held out the pie she was carrying. “This is for you. I know you probably haven’t had time to do much baking.”

  Jane received the pie graciously, and the women entered the house. Jane showed them into the main room, then returned to the kitchen to pour drinks. When she returned, she saw that Hetty and Sara were admiring the daguerreotype of Mr. and Mrs. Reiley.

  “Did you know them?” Jane asked, then reprimanded herself for being so blunt.

  Hetty spoke up as if nothing was amiss. “I knew them. We’d been neighbors for about nine years when they died. It was a carriage accident. They were going to Illinois to visit Mrs. Reiley’s relations, and there was some mishap with the stagecoach. It rolled down a steep embankment, and all the passengers died. Only the driver lived. It was so sad. These kids only had each other and God. Nathan and Gus, my husband, helped Luke and Caleb with the ranch until they could manage on their own. Caleb had to quit school. Elizabeth was in shock for some time.”

  “I can only try to imagine how terrible the tragedy was for them,” Jane said.

  “I didn’t know them at all.” Sara scooted back on the sofa until her feet were nearly off the floor. “They had been gone for two years by the time I moved here from Boston.”

  “What brought you to Cedar Springs?” Jane politely inquired. Hetty and Sara looked at one another and burst into laughter.

  Jane was confused by their reaction, but curious to know the reason for it. “What did I say?”

  Sara sobered and reassured Jane. “Oh, it was nothing you said, Jane. It’s just that I’ve never been asked that question, and it struck me how incredible my answer will sound.”

  “She’s right,” Hetty said. “I don’t think I would believe her story if I hadn’t been a witness to it.”

  Jane set her cup on the little table and settled back in her chair. “Please tell me. You’ve piqued my curiosity.”

  “Well, like I said, I lived in Boston before. My mother had passed away, and I lived with my stepfather, who was a drunkard. My situation was unpleasant to say the least, and I was searching for a way to escape. I ran across an ad in the Boston Herald that advertised for a wife. I responded to the ad, and here I am in Cedar Springs married to the man who placed it, Nathan.”

  Jane was shocked. “You came all this way to marry a man you had never met? How did you know he was a decent man?” Jane hoped she didn’t sound as if she were prying.

  “Well, we did exchange letters, and I knew he was a Christian, but I figured my other options were even worse, so I took a chance and came.”

  “That was very courageous.”

  “Oh, believe me! I was scared straight. Especially after I saw my groom-to-be.”

  “She was scared all right,” Hetty added. “She was as timid as a lamb in a wolf pack whenever Nathan was around, that is, until they got a better understanding of each other.”

  Jane recalled the way Nathan stood close to Sara in church, often with an arm draped protectively around her. “Things seem to have worked out well for you.”

  “I can’t tell you how wonderfully. Just over a year ago I was alone and scared, and here I am today married and about to become a mother!” Sara squirmed in her seat.

  “When are you due?” Jane asked.

  “Last week!” She made a face. “But I don’t think junior here has consulted the calendar.”

  Hetty patted Sara’s hand. “Now, child, that baby will come when he’s good and ready, and there ain’t no doctor can tell him when to be born!”

  Sara heaved a sigh. “I know you’re right, but if I get any bigger, I think I’m going to burst.”

  They laughed, and Jane gave her first genuine smile since the ladies came.

  “We should be leavin’,” Hetty said. “I can tell Sara’s back is achin’ by the way she won’t sit still. Besides, we don’t want to wear out our welcome.”

  “You’ve done no such thing.” Jane rose with the women and escorted them to the door. “It’s been refreshing to have company. Sara, I hope that baby comes soon, for your sake. Maybe Elizabeth and I will come by shortly afterwards with some baked goods.”

  “That would be lovely, Jane.” Sara and Hetty mounted the buckboard, and the women waved good-bye.

  Jane watched the wagon roll away and realized that, despite her disheveled appearance, she’d felt comfortable around Sara and Hetty; something she couldn’t say about many people outside her family.

  Elizabeth came running just after the wagon disappeared from sight. “Who was it?” she asked, out of breath from her run.

  “Sara and Hetty paid me a call.” Jane saw her disappointment and quickly added, “They brought a beautiful apple pie.”

  Elizabeth’s eyes lit up. “Ummm, my favorite! When is Sara going to have her baby? It’s taking forever!”

  Jane laughed. “I think Sara would agree with you there.” Just then, Jane remembered the dough she’d left rising in the kitchen. “Oh, my! I forgot about my bread. It’s probably halfway to the ceiling by now.”

  Elizabeth followed Jane to the kitchen where the dough was found to be salvageable once she punched it down. Jane prepared the bread to bake then fixed a simple lunch for herself and Elizabeth. Luke had packed a lunch again, so Jane knew he wouldn’t be back until suppertime.

  The familiar aroma of yeast filled the house as the bread baked, but the afternoon heat combined with the stove’s heat and compelled Jane to spend the rest of the day tending the garden. Elizabeth helped, and together they were able to finish the weeding she had started yesterday.

  After washing up by the pump, Elizabeth and Jane changed their dirt-smudged dresses and began supper preparations. As she cooked, perspiration dripped from Jane’s face, and she repeatedly swiped her forehead with her arm. Shortly before they were finished, Luke appeared.

  “Howdy, ladies.” He stopped just short of the kitchen door. “It’s hot as fire in here. What’d you do, cook all day?”

  His smile took the sting from his words, but Jane was infuriated that he’d guessed correctly. She should have known better than to try and bake bread in the heat of the afternoon. Her mother had taught her better than that! Jane set the last platter on the table and pulled herself up straight. “In fact, that’s just what I did, Mr. Reiley, do you have something to say about that?”

  Jane saw Luke’s mouth twitch, but to his credit, he was able to keep a straight face as he said, “Perhaps some fresh air would be nice,” then he proceeded to prop open the front door.

  Elizabeth and Jane took their seats as Luke made his way back to the table. Luke had no more than finished saying grace when they heard a horse coming full speed into the yard. Luke was the first to reach the porch, with Jane and Elizabeth shortly behind. Nathan McClain reared the horse to a stop in front of the house.

  “What’s wrong, Nathan?”

  “It’s Sara. The baby’s coming.” He was out of breath from the hard ride. “The pains are coming fast, and Hetty and Gus are at the Reverend Hill’s for supper. She’s all alone.” He pinned Jane with a plea. “Please, Jane, you have to go to her. She asked me to send for you, then get Doc and Hetty.”

  Luke jumped in. “Why don’t I get them, and you can take Jane back to your house.”

  “I don’t want to waste time while you saddle a horse. She needs the doctor quick. I’m afraid something’s wrong.”

  “All right. You go, and I’ll take Jane to Sara.”

  Nathan rode off toward town, and Luke ran to the barn to saddle a horse. Jane stood in bewilderment. Why did Sara ask for her? She knew nothing about birthing babies! And Luke hadn’t even given her a chance to speak for herself. What if she did something wrong? She’d only been six when her
mother had given birth to Katy, and she’d been shooed from the house for the day. What if the baby came before Nathan returned with the doctor and Hetty?

  “I hope Sara’s going to be okay.” Elizabeth’s comment brought Jane to the present. Before she could comment, Luke rode over on a mammoth horse.

  “Come here, Jane. You can ride in front of me.”

  He held out his hand, but Jane just stared in horror. She’d never even sat on one of the beasts.

  “Come on, Jane!” The impatience, which edged his voice, propelled her forward. She stepped up to the horse, and Luke’s hands circled her waist. She closed her eyes and gripped his hands as he settled her sidesaddle in front of him.

  “Can’t I come, too?” Elizabeth pleaded.

  “Sorry, Sis. You stay here and look after the house for me, all right?”

  Luke nudged the horse as Elizabeth nodded, disappointment dulling her eyes. If only we could trade places!

  Before Jane could even finish her thought, the horse was off and running. Luke maintained the reins with his right hand and had his left arm firmly around Jane’s waist. She clung to his arm with both hands and buried her face in his shoulder. They were wrapped so firmly together that their bodies moved as one on the horse.

  ❧

  Luke guided his mount through the grove of trees and across the prairie grass. At first his mind was on Sara and the baby as he prayed earnestly that all would go well. To be alone and in such pain was bad enough, but what if she were to deliver the baby without help? Nathan had sensed that something was wrong, and he wasn’t one to panic.

  Luke was thankful he lived close to Nathan, but the ride seemed to be taking an interminable amount of time. Just then, he became aware of pain gripping his left arm. Look-ing down, he saw that Jane’s arms were wrapped around his and her fingers were digging into his flesh. She’d turned her head into his chest, preventing Luke from viewing her face, but her clinging body made her terror obvious.