Hewitt: Jagged Edge Series #1

by A. L Long

  "What do you want us to do, boss?" Hawk asked, lifting his head.

  "Find him," I demanded. "I don't care what it takes, I want him."

  "You okay, bro?" Hawk asked, noticing my gritted teeth as I stood up.

  "Yeah, just a little inconvenience from that motherfucker," I snapped.

  All of the guys filed out of the room except for Hawk. Out of all the men who I served with and worked with, he was the closest thing I had to a brother. Closing the door, he turned to me with that look I knew so well. Taking a seat on the other end of the conference table, he said his piece. "Peter, you and I have known each other for a long time. I know that something is going on with you, and it goes deeper than this guy stalking Lilly. It's not like you to let someone get a piece of you. Are you going to spill or do I need to knock the shit out of you?"

  Hawk always had a way of getting his point across. There were no secrets between us. "Lilly knows about my past. I don't know how much her fucked-up mom told her, but she knows I had something to do with her brother's death."

  "You have to stop beating yourself up over what happened over fifteen years ago. That kid wasn't right. You said so yourself. Who calls someone a 'Coward' and then just releases their grip? He wanted to die, Peter. There's no way you could have known he was going to let go," he said.

  "You’re right. I have been off my game. I need to take care of this shit before it rips me apart." Standing, I patted Hawk on the shoulder before leaving the conference room. This thing between Lilly and me, had to stop now. Sooner or later, she needed to know the truth. It didn’t matter anymore, because either way she was going to hate me, at least this way she would know the truth.

  As I was leaving the shop, my phone began to vibrate in my pocket. Reaching behind me, I pulled it out to see Matt's contact on my screen. "Hey, Matt, I said, grunting as I painfully got into my car.

  "That little problem you wanted me to take care of for you has already been taken care of. Seems Diana Walker knows how to find trouble on her own. She was arrested this morning for possession and aiding and abetting a felon wanted on drug charges. Looks like you won't be hearing from her for a while," Matt said.

  "Let me guess, the felon was Bud Colver?" I asked.

  "Yeah, how did you know?" Matt questioned.

  "Lucky guess. Couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy," I said, feeling like things were finally going my way.

  ~****~

  It was nice to know that at least one of my problems was taken care of. The nice thing about it was that I didn't have to get my hands dirty to get it done. Driving to Lilly's place, all I could think about was how I was going to tell her the truth about her brother. I needed to listen to Hawk’s advice and remember that it wasn't my fault. As much as I hated the kid at the time, I wasn't the one who let go. Looking back on that day, maybe he did have a death wish. I just hoped that I could convince Lilly of that. Just like that, I remembered something I saved when I was a kid. I kept it as a constant reminder that I was never going to be that kid again. Turning around and heading back the other way, I accelerated onto the 9A, taking a left onto I-78 to the Holland Tunnel.

  Once I reached my building on Morgan Street, I slipped into my parking spot and rushed up to my apartment. There was no turning back now. Heading to my closet, I pulled out the shoe box that held all of my childhood memories. Most of them were too painful to forget. Tossing the lid on the bed, I lifted the items, remembering everything about each as I pulled them out one by one. I didn't know why I felt the need to keep these reminders of how shitty my childhood was. Maybe it was a reminder that I never wanted to be that boy again. I never wanted to be that helpless.

  Putting everything back inside, I tucked the box under my arm and headed out the door. Grabbing my helmet, I opted to take my bike instead of the Camaro. There was something about riding my bike that always helped me clear my head. It was like a rush, being free. Opening one of the compartments, I tucked the box inside and got on. Revving up the engine, I could already feel the pressure inside my gut start to ease.

  Reaching Lilly's building thirty minutes later, I parked my bike next to her Lexus. I would have parked my bike out on the street, but I was hoping that after I told her what needed to be said, she would understand and let me show her just how much I needed her. Hopefully it wasn't wishful thinking on my part. I didn’t know what I would do if I ever lost Lilly.

  Knocking lightly on the door, I waited for her to answer. I must have woken her up. Her hair was tied back in a messy pony and she didn't have any make-up on. God, she looked sexy as hell. She was only wearing a t-shirt and a pair of boy shorts. I was about ready to scold her for answering the door with barely any clothing on, but I knew I needed to remain calm. Watching her step aside, I walked past her and took a seat on the couch while placing the tattered box on the table.

  Sitting across from me and tucking her legs under her, and asked softly, "What are you doing here, Peter?"

  Patting my hand on the couch, wanting her next to me, I said, "I'm ready to tell you everything, Lilly. I can't stand the way things are between us. I'm tired of keeping secrets from you."

  "Okay,” she said, taking the place next to me.

  I didn't know where to begin. She must have sensed my uneasiness, because she placed her hand on my shoulder, taking my hand into hers with the other. "I know this is hard for you Peter. I just want to know the truth… about everything."

  Taking in a deep breath, I began. "My mom was a drug addict. Just like yours. Only I wasn't so lucky. She died when I was five. We lived in a rundown apartment in Brooklyn. It wasn’t much, but it was the only home I knew. She got some bad stuff. She never woke up. For days, maybe weeks I stayed with her, hoping she would. The police found me huddled next to her cold body. I always tried to keep her warm, but she was always cold. Needless to say, they took me away from her and placed me in a foster home."

  "Is that where you met my brother?" she asked softly.

  "Not right away. I was eight when he showed up. None of the other kids liked him. They thought he was messed up. I felt sorry for him, so I became his friend. His only friend. As we got older, he changed. It was like he hated everyone, even me. Everyone was afraid of him. He made threats against the other boys if they didn't give him their lunch or do what he asked. He was a bully. He grew to be really big. That's when our friendship ended. I was just a scrawny little kid. Even as I got older, I remained thin while he kept getting bigger and bigger. I hated that place. I swore when I was old enough, I would go into the military and become something. I always watched those commercials on TV with the 'Be all that you can be,’ shit." I could tell by the look on Lilly's face that she was beginning to understand how bad my childhood really was.

  Swiping a tear from her face, she said, "I'm sorry, Peter. I'm glad you're telling me this."

  I wasn't sure how glad she would be after I told her the rest of the truth. Placing my hand on her cheek, I began again. "Somehow, the rest of the boys, including me, convinced the foster parents to let us build a tree house. One of them sided with us, thinking it would bring all of us closer if we did something together. Looking back, I wish we never built that fucking thing." Gritting my teeth, I lowered my head as I forked my hands through my hair. "When I turned seventeen, I got a camera, one of those fancy digital ones. It was the best day of my life. I never had anything so nice. At first, I took pictures of everything. Then I only took pictures of what Adam was doing with the other boys. I thought if I had pictures of what he was doing to us, he would get in trouble and they would send him away."

  Standing, I walked over to the window to look out at the Manhattan sky. I could feel Lilly coming up behind me, placing her arms around my waist. "Peter, are you okay?" she asked.

  "Yeah. I just needed a little breather," I said, turning towards her.

  "What happened next, Peter?" she asked.

  Taking her by the hand, I walked her back to the couch, pulling her onto my lap. If I was going to
get the rest out, I wanted to make sure she was close to me. "My camera went missing. Adam took over everything, even the tree house. None of us could go up to it unless he gave his permission. I knew that he found out what I was doing. I knew my camera was in the tree house. He and some of the other boys went down the street to get an ice cream. I thought that was my chance to get my camera back. I went up to the tree house and searched for it. I found it hidden between two boards, but I wasn't quick enough. Adam was already up the stairs. He saw me and started laying into me. He started telling me what a fuck-up I was and what a whore my mom was. He said the reason she gave me up was because I was in the way when she fucked one of her Johns. I got so mad at him. All I could see was fire. The camera fell out of my hand and landed close to the edge of the tree house. I needed to get it, so I pushed him off of me, only I pushed him too hard. He went over the edge. He was hanging on with one hand. I reached for him to grab my hand. He did. I just stared at him. I couldn't pull him up. There was something in his eyes. I should have known.” My body began to tremble as I remembered the look on his face before he let go.

  "Oh my God, Peter. It wasn't your fault. You didn't know that by pushing him, he was going to fall. You were angry at him," she said, tears filling her eyes.

  "There's something else you need to know Lilly," I said, as I reached for the box and pull out the memory card that used to be in my camera all those years ago.

  Handing her laptop to her, I waited as she booted it up. I gave her the card containing my childhood memories. As she pushed the card into the side of her computer the pictures began loading one by one. I watched as she clicked through each one. There was so much love in the first few pictures, but as she continued to click forward, the darkness began to appear. It was only when she got to the last few pictures that she had seen the truth. That day in the tree house, during the fight, my camera must have landed on the shutter button when it fell out of my hand and hit the floor. It was still set on the auto mode, so it took picture after picture of what happened. The only thing that it was unable to record was the last word Adam said before he let go of my hand.

  Lilly's eyes were fixed on the last pictures when Adam fell to his death. His eyes weren't the only thing that said it all. It was also in the smile that the camera captured as he fell. Placing my hand on her shoulder, I wanted to comfort her. Her body was quivering as the tears spilled from her. I knew the truth would be hard on her. Turning her body to mine, I took her in my arms and held her close.

  "For so long, I blamed myself for his death. I should have never pushed him. I should have known better, I was older," I confessed.

  "There's no way you could have known that he was going to let go. I could see it in his eyes, Peter, he wanted to end his life," she said between sobs.

  I wasn't sure how much time had passed while I was sitting with Lilly cuddled like a child in my arms. Even though the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders, a heavy load had been added to hers. The family she thought she could save ended up being her worst defeat. The last thing I wanted was to hurt her.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  Lilly

  Sometime after midnight, Peter carried me to bed. I knew that the stuff he was going to tell me about by brother was going to be hard to handle. I was prepared to break things off with him, thinking that he killed my brother. What I didn't know was that he really didn't. Even though he blamed himself for pushing Adam, it was Adam who ultimately caused his own death by letting go.

  Rolling over to my side, I looked over to Peter who seemed more at peace with himself than he had ever been. I could only imagine what he went through as a kid, dealing with his mother’s death and being placed with strangers. It also made me realize how lucky I was that my life turned out the way that it did. Pushing up to my feet, I felt the need to reach out to my parents. Quietly exiting the bedroom so I wouldn’t wake Peter, I went to the kitchen to call my mom.

  After two rings, I heard my mom's happy voice. "Hey, sweetheart, is everything okay?"

  "Yeah, I just miss you guys," I said, twisting a loose piece of hair between my fingers.

  "We miss you too, Lilly. Your father and I are talking about coming to New York next week. We haven't seen you since the opening of Séduire. We thought it was time," she said excitedly.

  "Really? That would be wonderful," I responded, raising my arm and pulling it back in a 'yes' motion.

  Ending the call with my mom, I heard Peter walk up behind me. The warmth of his body enveloped mine as he placed a small tender kiss along my neckline to my shoulder, sending goose bumps down my body. Turning to face him, I saw a smirk on his face that I had grown to love. Placing my hands on his shoulders, I rose to my toes and kissed him on the lips. God, how I loved his lips. Without warning, Peter had me up off my feet, hauling me back to the bedroom. Somehow, something about this moment seemed so right. After everything that we had been through, he was the only person I wanted to be with. Even when we were apart, all I wanted was him.

  Peter gently placed me on the bed while carefully kneeling between my legs with his massive torso leaning over me. With his hands on either side of my head, he bent lower and kissed me on the lips. His tongue gently swept across my mouth, causing my lips to part. I was engulfed by his warmth. Reaching down his rippled abs, I slid my hand down the perfect 'V' and under his red boxers. Moving them over his hips and over his tight ass, I gripped his cheeks, pulling him even closer to me. My legs spread wider as I allowed him better access to my sex. I could feel the grinding movement of his hips as his hand glided down my chest, between my breasts, to the area just above my belly button. In one swift movement, Peter pulled my t-shirt up over my head and placed his hungry mouth over my taut nipple. Surges of pleasure radiated from the tip of my nipple to my core as Peter continued to lap and suck the hard peak. A soft moan escaped my lips, releasing the desire I had for this man.

  Moving his hand lower down my body, he placed his palm on my mound, while inserting his finger inside my channel. My back began to arch and my hips began to rock, needing to feel more of him as he pushed deeper inside. I sighed in frustration needing more. "Peter, please, I need you inside me."

  My body was just about to give way when Peter flipped me over pulling up on my hips. In one precise movement, Peter entered me, filling me with his hard cock. My walls began to stretch as I tried to accommodate his large rod. As he adjusted my hips so that he could get better penetration, I felt the onset of my release as the tip of his dick glided over my g-spot. "God, you feel so good, Lilly," I heard him say as I continued to hold tight to my impending explosion. "I'm going to fuck you until you scream my name," he said, pushing deeper inside me.

  When I was on the verge of letting go, once again, Peter pulled from inside me. "On your back, Lilly," he demanded.

  When I rolled over to my back, he opened my legs so that he could resume his place inside me. My heart was pounding and my breath was becoming short. Just a few more thrusts and I’d be his. Keeping me wanting, Peter slowed his rhythm and pulled completely out before thrusting back inside me. My body was hot and sweaty, in need of release. Opening my eyes, I saw Peter's eyes upon me. His hands lifted mine above my head, holding them in place. Adjusting his hold, he moved my hands together and gripped them with one of his own. Brushing his free hand across my cheek, Peter lowered his head and kissed me passionately on the lips. I could feel the beating of his heart. He broke the kiss, looking at me with compassion as he swiped his thumb slowly across my bottom lip. There was something in his eyes that I had never seen before, something pure and comforting. His eyes closed for only a moment when he uttered affectionately, "I love you, Lilly." It was only after I saw the only tear he had ever shed fall from his eye that I felt the same way.

  ~****~

  After three bouts of lovemaking, Peter finally left my condo. As much as he didn't want to, he had things to take care of. He said there would be no more secrets between us, so when I asked what he needed to
take care of, he told me that he and his team was going after Pierre. Even though I was glad that he told me, I was also afraid that something could go wrong. Pierre was no dummy. And seeing firsthand what he was capable of made me worry even more. To ease my anxiety, Peter said that he would check in with me so I would know that he was okay.

  Needing to get things done myself, I decided to head out to the gallery to take care of a few things. When I grabbed my keys, Cop was back outside my door. I felt bad over the way I treated him the other day. I never would have called the police on him, or any of Peter's men.

  Turning to him, I said, "Cop, about what I said before, about calling the police, I didn't mean it. I was just so angry with Peter."