Jessica's Wish

by Marci Bolden

  Yes, he remembered too well. Mallory had been wearing a bright blue dress that most people probably would have frowned upon at a wedding, but Mal always seemed to wear bright clothes. It hadn’t taken long for Phil to realize how much that reflected her personality. Bright. Bold. Strong. She stood out to him for so many reasons, at the wedding and now. But this was the exact thing he’d been concerned about, something he should have considered when he’d sat on the couch holding Mallory’s hand.

  In the moment, that had felt so right to him, but the signals it sent to Jessica were too confusing.

  “Yes, Jessica. I talked to her, but I didn’t really know her. We just were nice to each other. I’m getting to know her now. And we’re friends now.”

  She shoved her dresser drawer shut harder than necessary. “Well, I like her.”

  He crossed the room and sat on her bed. Resting his elbows on his knees, he sighed and ran his hands over his face. “Listen, kiddo, I know you’ve been feeling like there’s a hole in our lives. All your friends have moms who do stuff with them and teach them things that I don’t know a lot about, but we can’t just decide that we like Mallory and keep her like we’re going to keep Lucky. I know you want a mom. I get that. I understand it more than you know.”

  “Because you didn’t have a dad.”

  He nodded. “But before I let someone even think about getting close to you like that, I need to know that she’s the right person for you and for me. That takes time. It takes a long time to know if you love someone enough to marry them and even more time before you know if they are going to be a good parent to your kid. I’m not going to let just anybody into our lives, Jessica. Not like that.”

  “Mallory isn’t just anybody. She’s Annie’s daughter and my friend.”

  “I know. And she’s a good friend, too. But that doesn’t mean she’d be good at being your mom. You know what she said today? She said if you ever need anything you can talk to her. She said she’d be your friend, no matter what.”

  “That’s not the same,” Jess whispered as a sheen covered her eyes.

  Phil’s heart broke at the disappointment on her face. “I know, Punk. But it’s the best I can do right now.”

  She looked disheartened, but it really was the best he could do. Standing, he kissed her head. “Night, babe.”

  “Night, Daddy.” Her tone was pouty, confirming she wasn’t happy with his answer, but he opted not to further the discussion.

  Mallory was sitting in the spot Jessica had vacated, petting the dog’s head. “You’re going to be spoiled rotten. You know that, right?”

  “By me or Jessica?”

  She rolled her head up as she realized he’d returned. “By the entire Martinson-Canton clan, I suspect.”

  Phil shrugged. “I’m sure he will be. Wanna hang out for a while? We never got started on our marathon.”

  “It’s closing in on nine thirty.”

  “You have a curfew, Mal?”

  “No, but I assumed you had a strict schedule. Up at six. Work by eight. Home by six. Dinner by seven. Bed by ten.” She made a show of looking at her phone. “It’s now 9:22. Getting late, Dad.”

  He creased his brow, again feeling that strange sense of hurt that she didn’t seem to know he had a lighter side. That was the same sting he’d felt at the convention. “I’ll have you know that just last night, I stayed up until after eleven.”

  “Party animal.” Standing, she brushed her hands together. “Actually, it is a work night for both of us. I should go. We’ll start that marathon another time.”

  “Sounds like a plan.” Standing back, he had a sudden rush of awkwardness that he’d never felt when Mallory was gathering her things to leave. Something seemed to be urging him toward her, pleading with him to not let her leave. As she grabbed her coat from the hook by the wall, his breath quickened. He was running out of time to stop her, but what reason could she possibly have to stay?

  He’d told Jessica he didn’t like Mallory, but that hadn’t been the entire truth. He’d known it when he said it, but he had to be very careful of the ideas that were put into his daughter’s head. She clung to things, got attached, and didn’t always understand when plans had to change. He couldn’t imagine how hard she’d take it if he and Mallory started dating and then decided they weren’t compatible. Jessica would be so disappointed. So would Phil, so it would be best not to even think about that until he was absolutely certain that was the best next step.

  But this uneasiness in his stomach didn’t seem to want to listen to his excuses. His racing heart didn’t seem to want to listen to his warnings.

  Mallory stuck her feet in her shoes, rocking them back and forth as she shoved instead of simply untying the laces, and looked up at him. She was going to say something, but the words seemed to leave her. Her cheeks flushed bright pink, her mouth hung open, and her eyes locked on his.

  Phil swallowed hard and took a step forward without thinking. He put his hands to her face, and her eyes widened. One more deep breath, and he pressed his mouth to hers before he lost his courage.

  She froze like that princess in the movie about the ice queen that Jessica had finally stopped watching on a never-ending loop. Like a wet shirt hung on a line in the middle of winter. Like a woman who wasn’t expecting or wanting to be kissed.

  Oh. Crap.

  That was not the reaction he was hoping to get. Leaning back, he fumbled for the words to apologize as she stared up at him with wide, light gray eyes. Before his apology formed, however, she leaned up and her mouth was on his. He felt the same shock that she must have, the same surprise that had her standing as still as an ice statue. He got over his shock quickly, though.

  Holding her soft cheeks in his palms, he returned her kiss. Sweet, tender, and warm. Just like her.

  The moment didn’t last nearly as long as he would have liked, but when she pulled back, instead of looking wide-eyed and shocked, she was smiling. “I could stay,” she whispered but then closed her eyes and gave her head a hard shake. “No. I can’t. I can’t. I really have to go.” She heaved a breath as she peered up at him with a plea in her eyes, looking absolutely torn. “Tell me I have to go.”

  He didn’t want to, but that was for the best. Jessica could get up and down a dozen times on a good night. Knowing Lucky was in the other room, Phil expected her excuses to get out of bed would double, if not triple. If Mallory stayed, his insistence that they were just friends would likely be blown out of the water. Jessica had already seen them holding hands. He couldn’t imagine the idea she’d get if she caught them kissing.

  Brushing his hand over Mallory’s hair, he forced himself to stand by the decision. “You have to go.”

  “Before I do something bad?”

  Phil chuckled as her impish grin spread and she batted her long lashes. “Yes. Before we do something bad.”

  She pouted in the most seductive way. “Perhaps we can plan that for another night.”

  Heat filled his cheeks. He wasn’t usually one to blush, but something in her voice told him things had definitely just changed for the better. “Go home, Mallory.”

  She lifted her bag over her shoulder and took a step back but then fisted his shirt and pulled him to her. One big step, and she put her lips to his. Her tongue lightly brushed over his lip, sending a tsunami of heat to his core. So many promises in that one swift motion. So much temptation he wanted to cry.

  “Good night,” she breathed, and then she was gone, and he was left with a giant smile, a racing heart, and an imagination gone absolutely insane.

  Chapter Eight

  Mallory couldn’t sleep all night. She couldn’t stop thinking about how Phil had kissed her. Out of the blue, without the slightest bit of warning. She also couldn’t stop obsessing about how she’d stood there like an idiot. She hadn’t realized how much she’d wanted him to kiss her until he had, but she’d gone rigid like a deer in a spotlight. She guessed she had looked like one, too.

  Poor guy had
started to stutter, probably about to beg for her forgiveness, before her brain started working and she could stop thinking he kissed me! on a loop in her head. She hadn’t exactly fantasized about Phil kissing her, but if she had, it wouldn’t have played out with her acting like a mannequin for the first few seconds.

  Once her brain snapped to and she was able to kiss him back, she’d damn near swooned. The innocence on his face, the questions in his eyes, had made her insides melt. She wished she had a picture of that moment. She imagined they would have looked like a pair of fools to anyone else. She wouldn’t say their first kisses were wasted, but they certainly could have been sexier.

  She’d remedy that. And the sooner the better.

  She’d rushed through getting ready for work, looking at her watch over and over until she knew he was up and had Jessica off to school. Then she debated whether she should call him. She wanted to call him. She wanted to hear his voice, but she didn’t want to seem desperate.

  That didn’t stop her, though. She called his cell as soon as she got behind the wheel of her car. Her smile spread so far it hurt when his voice filtered through her speakers. “Sorry to call so early,” she said, even though she wasn’t.

  “No problem.”

  She took a breath. “What are you doing for dinner tonight?”

  “Jess has gymnastics. I usually take her for nuggets after.”

  Her smile faded. “Oh.”

  “Why? What’s up?”

  “I was…well…” Straightening in her seat, she tapped into the strong, independent woman her mother had taught her to be. Taking a breath, she blurted out her intentions before she could second-guess herself. “I thought maybe we’d have dinner. Uh…just us.”

  “I, um…”

  She swallowed at the hesitation in his voice. Oh, man. If he backtracked on their quick good-night, she was going to die of embarrassment. She’d all but offered to stay and “be bad.” What the hell had she been thinking? Oh, right. She hadn’t been thinking. Her head had started spinning, and her body had come alive and begged for more of whatever he offered.

  The implication of them going on a date hung in her car like the scent of a flower.

  “That’d be great,” Phil finally said. “I, um, I would like that very much.” His voice sounded unsure, but she decided that was probably just him being surprised. He probably hadn’t seen that bold move coming. “I’ll ask Dad if he can take Jess tonight.”

  “Well, if you don’t want to add to what Harry and Kara already have on their plate, I’m sure Mom and Marcus would take her. Mom would love to see her showing off at class.”

  “That’d be great. If they can’t, let me know, and I’ll talk to my dad.”

  “Phil?”

  “Hmm?”

  “I just want to be clear: I am asking you out on a date.”

  He was quiet for a moment. “I haven’t been on a date in a long time.”

  “Me either.”

  “I’ll, um”—his voice sounded light, as if he were smiling in that way that made his cheek dimple—“I’ll try to remember proper protocol.”

  She laughed. “As far as I’m concerned, proper protocol is show up on time and be nice.”

  “Well, even I can’t mess that up too much. Let me know what your parents say about Jess, okay?”

  “Will do.” She ended the call and squealed, actually freaking squealed. She and Phil were going on a date. A real date. Not a take-Jess-to-do-something outing. A date. Like grown-ups. She tried to take her excitement down a notch, but as soon as she was at the office, she headed straight for the office Annie and Marcus shared. The space used to just be Annie’s. Since her injury impacted not only her speech but her ability to drive, she couldn’t meet clients any longer. They would have too hard a time understanding her. Since she was no longer an agent, it made more sense for Marcus to occupy the big space; however, there was a second desk that Annie utilized a few hours a week to contribute however she could. Today, she was hovering over her touchscreen laptop, frowning at something.

  “A little early to look so frustrated,” Mallory observed.

  “Oh, it’s never too early for that,” Annie said. “How are you this morning?”

  “Wonderful.”

  Lifting her brows, Annie sat back and focused on Mallory. “Oh? Does your good mood have anything to do with Phil Martinson-Canton?”

  Mal narrowed her eyes. “Do you think, just once, you could contain your know-it-all shitshow?”

  Marcus snickered as he slid by Mallory with two cups of coffee in his hands. “Fat chance.”

  “Hey,” Annie chastised. “Mind your manners.”

  He kissed her head as he put a mug on her desk. “I was.”

  Returning her attention to Mallory, Annie chuckled. “Why are you feeling so wonderful this morning?”

  “Because…” She grinned. “I asked Phil out on a date, and he said yes.”

  Annie gasped as she perked up. “Really?”

  “The catch is Jessica has gymnastics tonight. I was hoping you guys would be able to take her so I can steal her father.”

  “Of course,” Annie said without hesitation or checking with Marcus, who would be the one driving them around. “She can spend the night. We can take her to school in the morning.” Finally, she looked at her husband. “Right?”

  “Slow down,” Mallory stated. “Jeez, Mom. We’re just going out for dinner.”

  “No dessert, then?” Marcus grinned, and Annie chuckled.

  “Why do you two make me regret everything I say to you?”

  “Because we can, sweetie,” Annie stated.

  Mallory rolled her eyes but decided to move on. “What had you looking so frustrated when I came in?”

  “Trying to update the newsletter template. I’m bored with the old one.”

  “Well. You do know that I’m a graphic designer, right? I’m sure I could figure something out.”

  Annie lowered her gaze to the screen, looking a bit defeated. “I know. Why don’t you do it? I’m making more of a mess than anything.”

  Mallory’s good mood dipped right along with her mother’s. Annie’s contributions were limited enough, and here Mallory was taking away another one. “We should work on it together, Mom. I think my morning is pretty open. Shall we convene in the conference room with coffee and bagels?”

  Her smile returned. “Sounds fun.”

  “See you there.” She pushed herself off the door and went to her office, where she immediately called Phil. She was disappointed to get his voice mail but happy to leave news that Annie and Marcus were on board for gymnastics class. She glanced at her door, making sure her nosy mother wasn’t eavesdropping. “Let me know when they need to pick her up. Or if you want us to drop her off or…whatever. Also, I thought I should warn you that I’ll probably still find a way to talk about comic books and anime. I don’t want you think that I’m suddenly going to turn into a mature human being just because there isn’t a kid around.”

  Ending the call, she bit her lip to try to stop her smile from breaking her face.

  “Ready?” Annie asked from the doorway, her smile almost as big as Mallory’s.

  Oh, man. This was going to be interesting. She’d have to use all her superpowers to keep Annie focused on the newsletter instead of her and Phil. She wasn’t sure her powers were strong enough. Taking her laptop with her, she went to the break room, filled a mug with coffee, and dropped a plain bagel onto a plate. Juggling her load, she went to the conference room, where Annie was waiting for her.

  “Okay,” Mal said, opening her laptop. “What are you thinking for the newsletter?” When Annie didn’t answer, she chuckled. “It’s just a date, Mom. Stop planning my wedding.”

  Annie nudged her. “It’s not that.”

  She glanced at her and lifted her brows to express her disbelief. “Then what is it?”

  “All I’ve ever wanted was to see that smile on your face. It’s been too long, Mal.”

 
A spear went through her heart. “Mom.”

  Stroking her hand over Mallory’s hair, Annie sniffled. “I know you gave up everything you ever wanted in California to take care of me. You can deny it all you want, but I know. I love you for it, but that’s not what I wanted for you. I want you to be happy. You look happy this morning.”

  “I am,” Mal whispered. “I like him.”

  “Good.”

  “But slow your roll, Mom. It’s one date.”

  Wrapping her arm around Mallory’s shoulders, Annie hugged her and kissed her head. “For now.”

  “Mom,” she moaned but couldn’t help her smile from spreading again. “You’re impossible.”

  Phil chuckled when he realized his stomach was fluttering as he walked to Mallory’s door. He’d dropped Jessica off, decked out in her pink leotard and sweatpants, and had rushed off to pick up his date. His date. The word had made him smile like a fool all damned day.

  Knocking on Mal’s door, he let out a long, nervous breath. No, not nervous. Eager. Excited. Over the flippin’ moon.

  She opened her door, and his heart leaped. She wasn’t wearing anything fancier than he’d ever seen before. They’d hung out after work plenty of times, but her tight, mid-thigh-length white skirt and fitted lavender blouse seemed to be as sexy as any lingerie he’d ever seen. Her hair had waves styled throughout. Again, nothing he hadn’t seen on her before, but tonight they seemed to be begging for him to run his fingers through them.

  And her purple-painted lips? Had they always been so damned inviting?

  She stepped aside and gestured for him to enter. He was tempted to stay on her porch. Somehow that seemed like the gentlemanly thing to do, but the soft scent of her flowery body spray lured him in.

  “I just need to grab a sweater. I always get cold in restaurants.”

  He knew that about her. Almost every time they ate out, halfway through she’d slip her arms into a sweater or a coat to warm up. More than once he’d pointed out that if she dressed a bit warmer than her usual T-shirts or thin blouses, she’d stay warmer. She’d just roll her eyes and tell him he sounded like her mother.