Psychology of Submission

by Livia Grant

  His question caught her off guard. What was the worst thing that could happen? "I don't know. I guess they could throw rotten tomatoes at me and boo me off the podium."

  Sean laughed at her. "Well, I've been managing this hotel for two years and we've never had any keynote speaker booed off the stage. If you'd like, I'll be sure to have the kitchen hide all of the tomatoes in the morning." His easy jesting helped to calm her.

  "That won't be necessary."

  "Good. So what's the best thing that can happen tomorrow?"

  She'd been so focused on the bad things she feared that she hadn't even thought of this question before. He gave her time. "I don't know. I guess I'll present interesting and helpful information to my colleagues and they'll be able to use it as they treat their own patients."

  "That's great, but I predict you're going to earn the respect of a lot of your peers. Now, are you going to go in there and hold your head up high?"

  "I guess. I don't really have a choice."

  "That didn't sound very convincing."

  "It's not easy. There are some jerks out to discredit me."

  "Don't let them make that your problem. The best way to combat that is to knock your presentation out of the park. Then they'll look like idiots to criticize you."

  "I guess. You'd make a pretty good therapist, you know that?"

  Sean grinned. "I doubt that. I've had an ulterior motive."

  "And that was?"

  "Well, I'm holding you in my arms and feeling up your ass, aren't I?"

  A surge of emotions converged as the intimacy of their embrace reminded the occupants of the gondola hanging one-hundred and fifty feet above the ground of their first private moment together. Sean looked into her eyes and searched to ensure she was a willing partner in what was about to happen. Traci's heart raced as she self-consciously licked her lips, hoping their conversation was at an end. To his credit, he didn't ask before he closed the distance between them.

  Sean's lips claimed her with a tenderness that quickly escalated with an urgency that told her he was fighting to maintain control. When she parted her lips, Sean pressed his tongue forward, sweeping in to claim her in an open-mouth kiss full of a promise Traci wished could be true. Sean clutched her closer, pulling her to sit in his lap as she threw her arms around his neck. She slid her hands through his thick, dark hair and held him in a way to ensure he couldn't escape.

  They made out like teenagers. Kissing... moaning... groping... Through her escalating sexual haze, Traci could feel the swell of Sean's cock under her ass, impossible to ignore. Did she dare hope he wanted to make love to her as badly as she wanted him at this moment? If they were at the hotel instead of on a carnival ride, she was positive she wouldn't want him to stop, one-night-stand or not.

  The sound of an embarrassed young worker clearing his throat reminded them that they had returned to earth, literally. They pulled out of their kiss, but Sean was in no hurry to exit the ride. Instead, he reached up to brush her cheek tenderly, the sexiest smile on his face.

  "I think we're going to have to take an intermission, Ms. Jackson."

  Traci grinned back with relief. "That implies our date isn't over yet."

  "I sure hope not. Let's go."

  Traci avoided looking at the grinning teenager working the ride too closely. There was a long line of people waiting for their turn to ride and they had been giving everyone a nice little show, but Sean didn't seem bothered at all. In fact, once they exited the ride, he pulled her close as they walked towards the line of waiting taxis. Traci was relieved he wasn't going to have them walk back to the hotel.

  The hotel was close so the ride was short. They pulled up in the carport before Traci had a chance to process the emotions raging through her brain. She liked Sean – a lot. Maybe too much. This had disaster written all over it. She was sure she didn't want a one-night stand, but wouldn't a three-night stand be even worse? Spending three days with this amazing man would only make getting on a plane to fly hundreds of miles away on Friday that much harder.

  Sean seemed to read her thoughts. As soon as they exited the taxi, he pulled her aside, back into his arms and looked into her eyes.

  "I've really enjoyed our time together tonight. I'm not ready for our date to end yet, Traci."

  "I don't want it to end either, but... well..."

  "I get it. I understand. You live in Colorado. I live in Chicago. You have a big speech to prepare for. I have a fifteen-year old daughter waiting up so she can grill me on how big of an ass I made out of myself tonight."

  He really did understand. "I'm dreading my speech, but maybe I'm getting the better end of the stick tonight." Traci tried to keep the mood light in spite of her growing sadness. She knew that no matter how perfect Sean was on the surface, they wouldn't be able to take this any farther than a hot summer fling. Besides having a geography problem, Traci needed an HoH. The chances of Sean being interested in a domestic discipline relationship were slim.

  Sean dragged her back to the present. "Let's go to the hotel bar. We can have a nightcap. I'm not ready to say goodnight yet." His offer was hanging in the air when the nearby doorman interrupted them.

  "Mr. Campbell, I hate to disturb you, but I know Mr. Hansen has been trying to reach you on your phone for the last hour, sir. Your daughter told him you'd gone out for the night, but I'm afraid there was a small fire in the kitchen. The fire department just left and as the manager on duty, Mr. Hansen is working on evaluating the situation. I know he's anxious for your advice on how to proceed."

  Sean was not happy. "Damn. Figures. The first night I try to have a life and someone tries to burn the place down. I'm so sorry, Trace. Can I take a rain check for that drink? Better yet, how about dinner again tomorrow night?"

  Traci saw vulnerability in his eyes. Little did he know she was helpless to fight against the attraction they shared. "I'd love to do dinner again, that is if I'm still alive after my speech in the morning. If they run me out of town, I'll be sure to leave you a note."

  "Hey, you're going to knock 'em dead tomorrow. You are an intelligent, well-spoken professional who has very important information to share. You've earned your seat at the table, Traci. Don't dread it. Enjoy it. Embrace it."

  His words filled her with hope and confidence. How nice it felt to have someone playing the role of her cheerleader. "Thank you so much, Sean. I've had the best night. I'll look forward to seeing you tomorrow night then."

  Despite the fact that the doorman, his employee, remained conspicuously close, Sean leaned in for a short goodnight kiss.

  "Night, Sean."

  "Sweet dreams, Traci."

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Sean reached for his grande café latte with an extra shot of espresso. It was going to be a very long day. After assessing the fire damage to the kitchen the night before, he was able to get workers to come in and make repairs overnight to avoid any interruption in service to the guests.

  Between worrying about the literal fire caused by an electrical short and the figurative fire in his cock caused by one Traci Jackson, Sean hadn't been able to sleep a wink.

  After tossing and turning for hours, he'd gotten out of bed at three in the morning and thrown on a pair of sweats. He wasn't proud of the fact that he had snuck down to the Skyline Ballroom so he could nick a copy of Traci's research paper waiting to be distributed to the attendees the next morning. He knew even before taking it that he was skirting an ethical line by reviewing her work without her permission. After reading her brief, he knew without a doubt that Traci would never have shared it with him. He'd been a ball of nerves since finishing it.

  You're getting what you deserve, asshole. If she'd wanted you to know the details, she would have told you herself.

  Her report had been professional and clinical, yet that did not stop him from remembering who wrote each and every word. Even if his mind could forget, his ever-present semi-hard erection ensured he remembered the details intimately.

  Sean
had expected sexual content. What he hadn't been prepared for was the in-depth exploration of dominance and submission in relationships and more specifically, the benefits of corporal punishment and other forms of discipline to heighten the intimacy within relationships. While Traci's research referenced many clinical sources and cited passages taken from sessions with dozens of couples engaged in domestic discipline relationships, it was the final pages where Traci summarized her findings that had hit Sean hardest.

  He wished he had more time to process the information, but he'd barely finished reading the brief when his alarm went off. Somehow he had managed to get through an early morning conference call with Europe, but then had Shirley clear his schedule for the rest of the morning to allow him time to attend Traci's presentation.

  Sean told himself he was only going to give her invisible moral support, but that was a lie. He needed to hear the words come out of her mouth so he could hopefully understand what she was looking for in a relationship. She lived in Colorado and he was in no position to start a long distance romance, yet there was something special about Traci that kept her in his thoughts.

  Maybe attending her presentation will help you realize how you couldn't possibly be the kind of man she needs.

  Sean had never even contemplated spanking Jerilyn throughout their fifteen-year marriage. He knew without a shadow of a doubt his wife would have decked him first and filed for divorce soon after if he'd tried to turn her over his knee to discipline her. Not that she hadn't needed it, mind you. Anger flared as he remembered he was just now finishing paying off some of the hidden credit cards she had maxed out without his knowledge during their marriage.

  No matter how many fights they'd had over money, no matter how many times he'd begged and she'd promised, she just couldn't seem to help herself. He'd loved her, yet her blatant disrespect for spending within their budget had caused almost irreparable rifts in their marriage at times. In the end, she'd been so ill that arguing over money had seemed silly when faced with life and death health issues.

  Not for the first time, Sean wondered if he and Jerilyn would still be married if she hadn't gotten sick. Perhaps if he'd been a stronger husband, providing the kind of dominance and leadership Traci wrote about in her paper, things could have been different.

  "Oh, hello, Mr. Campbell. May I get you something, sir?"

  Sean had been hiding out in the staff-only serving room next to the Skyline Ballroom. He'd known at some point the servers would be coming in, but he couldn't very well sit out with the other conference participants. Not only because he wasn't invited, but he knew his presence would only make Traci more nervous. He wished he'd gotten her cell phone number so he could text her good luck this morning.

  "Thanks, Kathy, but I don't need anything. I'm just going to hang out here for a while if you don't mind. My friend is delivering the presentation this morning and I'd like to watch without making her nervous."

  "Sure thing, Mr. Campbell. Let me at least get you a chair."

  The room was almost full to its three-hundred capacity. Traci was not there yet. Sean worried that Traci might try to back out, but then he saw her sweep into the room, looking radiant. No one in the room could possibly detect how nervous she was, but Sean caught her slowing as she got closer to the front of the room. She scaled the few steps to the makeshift stage and shook hands with several function organizers who looked relieved that she'd finally shown up.

  From his vantage point stage left, Sean had a side view of the podium. Traci wore a black and cream tailored suit with a pencil skirt that ended just above her knees. He couldn't help but ogle her long legs and wished he could cup her perfectly proportioned ass as he had the night before on the Ferris wheel. Sean forced himself to focus on the growing crowd instead and he suspected it was making her more nervous to watch his staff bring in additional chairs to accommodate the larger than anticipated crowd.

  Traci sat on the stage and waited to be introduced. Her fingers trembled as she held her notecards, yet he was so proud that she projected a confidence he knew she wasn't necessarily feeling to the rest of the room. He wished he could give her another pep talk before she walked to the podium, but there wasn't time. She was being introduced. She took a cleansing breath before standing and walking to the podium.

  After the polite round of applause died down, Traci began her presentation. Her voice was strong and Sean wondered if she'd been exaggerating her fears the night before.

  "I want to thank Dr. Albright for inviting me to speak this year. Being able to share my research and findings with all of you is an honor and I want to thank you for attending today. I hope everyone picked up a copy of my brief on your way in. You're welcome to take notes this morning, and I have saved time at the end to answer any questions.

  "As the program outlines, the focus of my presentation today will be on the dynamics of dominance and submission in intimate relationships. Notice that I used the word intimate verses sexual. For some, these terms may be synonymous. For purposes of today's discussion, they are not. Many relationships are of a sexual nature, yet lack the kind of intimacy I'm going to discuss today. Likewise, a successful D/s or dominance and submissive relationship relies on an intimacy and trust that runs much deeper than can be achieved through mere sex."

  Sean lost himself listening to Traci talk with passion about the benefits of a D/s relationship. He was especially fascinated as she delved into the definition of a domestic discipline relationship. Traci presented statistics on the growing numbers of couples enjoying the benefits of happier marriages as a result of one partner assuming a dominant leadership role while the other agreed to be the submissive partner, deferring to their head of household or HoH for all important decisions. She clarified that while most of her research had been with traditional couples where the man took the leadership role and the female the submissive, the dynamic would work in any type of relationship be it F/f, M/m or even F/m. The only constant that must be there in all DD relationships was consent.

  Sean listened with interest as Traci outlined the importance of consent between partners. "Without consent, there can be no domestic discipline. For an HoH to exert his authority, be it physical or emotional, without the previous consent of his submissive is tantamount to abuse. We all know that communication is important with any relationship, be it platonic friendships to intimate sexual couples. With a domestic discipline relationship, communication is more important than ever before as the foundation of a domestic discipline relationship is built on clearly understanding the rules and behaviors agreed upon in advance by both partners as well as the planned consequences for breaking those rules. Submissive partners consent to the rules and consequences long before the day a punishment is to be delivered."

  A commotion broke out towards the back of the room. Sean couldn't hear what was said, but as he stood, he could see that the jerks who had been following Traci the day before were at the center of the disturbance. Sean was tempted to burst out there and escort them out, but he didn't get a chance. Traci confronted them head on.

  "There seems to be a question in the back of the room. Dr. Meyer, did you have something to say that can't wait until the designated Q&A period?"

  The doctor's face flushed crimson at being called out by name from the podium. He recovered and plastered a sour look on his face as he blatantly tried to embarrass Traci. "You used the word punishment. I find it very hard to believe that there are women living in the year 2015 that willingly allow their husbands to punish them for breaking a rule."

  "Thank you for your opinion, Dr. Meyer, but I assure you there are many such women and even men who believe in the power of such relationships. I know many personally."

  "That's what this is all about, isn't it? You're just trying to drum up business for that crazy town you live in, Corbin's Bend?"

  Sean was back on his feet. He felt helpless. He knew if he rushed in there it would only embarrass Traci more, yet he hated to stand by while she was put on th
e spot. She took a deep breath before answering.

  "I'd like to apologize to the rest of those in attendance. I believe Dr. Meyer misunderstood the type of forum we have today. It seems he has so much interest in this topic he's not able to hold his questions until the end. Regardless, as I cited clearly in the research paper you are all holding, much of my research has indeed taken place in Corbin's Bend, Colorado, a town founded on the principles of domestic discipline in general and spanking more specifically. But I ask you, Dr. Meyer. Isn't that what all of us in this room do? We travel to those locations where we need to conduct our research? That such a town exists only adds credence to the growing number of couples engaging in a domestic discipline way of life, wouldn't you agree?"

  The rounds of approving whispers and nods at Traci's comment had Dr. Meyer turning beet red with anger. "Well, I think you're certifiable and I can't believe the leadership team is wasting our time with this ridiculous topic."

  Several doctors who sat on the stage behind Traci stood and stepped up next to Traci as if to show their support for her. An older gentleman in a three-piece suit looked angry enough that he might jump off the stage to confront Dr. Meyer directly.

  Sensing she was losing control of the crowd, Traci addressed the room again. "You are certainly entitled to your opinion on my work, Robert, as is everyone else present. The room is, however, full to capacity, which tells me there is a great deal of interest in my research. The fact that you are bothered by the topic of D/s so vehemently has me wondering if you are perhaps struggling to acknowledge your own submissive tendencies. If everyone would flip to page thirty-six in the presentation, you will note the similarity of Dr. Meyer's outbursts today to similar reactions from my test subjects who were struggling to accept their natural role within the D/s continuum. Perhaps you should make an appointment for later and I'll see if I can help you work through that."

  Rounds of barely contained laughter could be heard throughout the audience. Even from far across the room, Sean saw the figurative steam coming out of the properly chastised Dr. Meyer's ears. With a final look that could kill, Traci's heckler stood and exited in a huff.