The Choice

by Shayla Black

  “Thanks.” Beck nodded.

  “I’ll visit you tomorrow, Dad,” she promised.

  He raised a tired hand and closed his eyes.

  When Beck and Seth led her away, Heavenly’s heart stuttered. She wrapped her arms around herself. She was doing the right thing. Her dad needed good care, certainly better than she could provide. But this was the first night she’d spend without him since…well, ever.

  Suddenly, Beck’s arms circled her shoulders. “He’s fine here.”

  “He’s where he needs to be,” she acknowledged with a jerky nod.

  Seth took her into his arms and cupped her face. “Yeah, he is. And now we need to get you where you need to be.”

  “Maybe I should stay and—”

  “There’s nothing you can do for him tonight, angel. The hospital is taking care of his needs. He would want us to take care of yours.”

  She blinked, looking down the empty hall, then turned back to the expectant men. She was so accustomed to being responsible for her father’s life and well-being. Heck, for her own, too. Someone else planning everything for her, despite the fact they were far more capable, made her anxious. And totally overwhelmed her.

  “Heavenly?”

  Slowly, she nodded. “Yes.”

  Seth caressed her face, then brushed his palm down her arm before he took her hand. “Time to go.”

  “You’re right.”

  As they backtracked to her familiar unit, the edges of her vision blackened and tunneled in. Her equilibrium tilted. She was so tired her legs felt like noodles. She stumbled over her own feet.

  A soft curse rang in her ears. Seth. Then he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, tucked the other under her knees, and lifted her against his chest. Suddenly, she was floating.

  No, he was carrying her.

  “I can walk,” she croaked out. Funny, what she said sounded more like slurs than words.

  “You can if I put you down. But I’m not going to. End of conversation.”

  No missing his implacable tone. She didn’t have the energy to argue anyway. Tomorrow she’d start making plans again and take all this responsibility back from them. Tonight, she needed sleep.

  Heavenly closed her eyes and laid her head on Seth’s shoulder, barely aware when he eased her into the car. She had no memory of the drive to the condo, only of being lifted out of the car and carried across a bright parking garage. A keycard and an elevator ride later, they emerged into an enclosed atrium. It was industrial and sleek, obviously new and pristine and very upscale.

  Beck was willing to let her stay here? Ha. Even if he didn’t intend to make her pay rent, she’d insist…but she could never afford it. Still, she had to admit, spending a night or two here would be absolute paradise.

  He let them in the front door. Absently, she noticed he carried her suitcase. Everything else he must have left in the car. Fine. Tomorrow would be soon enough to take that off his hands.

  Seth set her on her feet just inside the condo. Beck flipped on the lights.

  Heavenly’s jaw dropped. A gorgeous, tufted black leather sofa and a flat-screen TV took up most of the space on her left. Blinds covered the huge windows on the far side of the room where she saw a commanding yet comfy matching recliner.

  “Follow me,” Beck said as he walked past a bar area, then turned on more lights that illuminated a state-of-the-art kitchen and breakfast nook and pointed through a dark opening on the far side of the room. “Inside is a bedroom and bath. Go take a hot shower. I’ll start making food.”

  She didn’t have the energy to argue or even to offer help. “Thank you.”

  He nodded, then pointed Seth to another bathroom and offered to let him borrow some clothes. They were discussing taking shifts in the shower when Heavenly closed the door and found herself in a luxurious black and marble bathroom with hot water that felt like Shangri-La. She scrubbed vigorously, as if she could wash away not only the blood and memories of Sanchez’s touch but her worries, fears, doubts, and dread.

  Finally, she stepped out, wet hair in a haphazard braid, and found her suitcase on a bed that was covered in a mountain of soft pillows. Tiredly, she fished out a pair of underwear and one of her old nightshirts. On the other side of the door, she heard the sounds of bacon frying and the murmur of the men talking.

  They must have a million questions. She owed them some answers. But she also had some things to say, too.

  Heavenly sucked in a deep breath and tried to find the energy to face them as she opened the door.

  When she padded barefoot into the kitchen and stopped beside the island, she was surprised to see they’d both showered, tossed on sweats and T-shirts, and now stood, each manning a burner on the stove, seemingly comfortable.

  “Can I help?”

  They swiveled their gazes in her direction. Stared. Froze. Gaped. She swallowed, nerves buzzing again. What was wrong?

  Finally, Beck cleared his throat. “We’re almost done. Can you get the forks out of that drawer, the napkins from the holder on the counter, and, um, set them on the table?”

  She shrugged. “Sure.”

  Seth still hadn’t blinked. “Damn.”

  He’d muttered the word almost under his breath, and she frowned. Beck elbowed him, and Seth finally jerked his stare back to the stove and the rapidly cooking eggs.

  They must be exhausted, too. The gratitude for all they’d done welled up as she set everything on the table. She’d been too overwrought earlier, but the magnitude of their outreach truly sank in now.

  She was shocked. Humbled. More than a little confused. And she owed them big.

  The day she’d told Beck and Seth there could be no future with either of them, she hadn’t given any reason. She hadn’t wanted to open her scars and bleed. But as much as it would hurt now, they’d earned that—and more.

  As soon as she set three places, the guys hustled over with steaming food. Seth handed her orange juice. Beck helped her into her chair. Then the two of them sat. Only the clatter of dishes and the clink of forks broke the silence.

  Heavenly reached for a piece of toast. “Thank you for everything tonight. I can never repay you for all you’ve done. And I know you have questions. I want to explain—”

  “Not tonight.” Beck set down his fork. “We do have questions.”

  “Plenty of them,” Seth assured her. “But not until you’ve slept.”

  “Exactly.” Beck nodded. “Right now, eat.”

  She let out a sigh of surprised relief. It was nice to breathe. It was also nice to be clean, have hot food, and know that both she and her father would be safe and warm.

  It wasn’t as if it would be hard to yield to their wishes.

  “All right. We’ll talk in the morning.”

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  Sunday, March 31

  On the other side of the shadowy living room, Beck heard Seth roll over on the inflatable mattress he’d blown up twenty minutes ago before letting out a heavy sigh.

  He understood. It had been a long fucking night of blindsides and shock. The sun would be up in a couple of hours. Then he’d have to deal with all the shit, so he needed to shut his eyes and get some sleep. But his goddamn brain wouldn’t stop spooling with ramifications and what-ifs.

  Not everything had ended up a clusterfuck. Heavenly was safe. Abel was getting the quality care he deserved. Their scum-sucking landlord was in agony. And finally, his girl was under his roof…just not the way he’d envisioned. In his fantasies, he was in bed with her. Hell, he was inside her. But nothing about this situation was optimal. The secrets she’d harbored—no, the lies she’d told—were tough to swallow, but he’d also plowed face first into one indisputable fact:

  Tonight, everything had changed.

  Ten feet away, Seth rustled on the sheet again and groaned.

  Beck turned over on the sofa. “Hey, if you’re jacking off, take that shit to the bathroom. I don’t want to hear it.”

  “Like I’d ever jack
off in the same room with you.”

  “Glad to hear you’ve got some standards.”

  “Why the fuck would you think I’d jack off anywhere near you?”

  “I saw your face after Heavenly pranced into the kitchen wearing that tight little kitten nightie.” The word PURRFECT had stretched across her perky tits. She hadn’t been wearing a bra. For a long moment, Beck had just stared. He didn’t have to guess that Seth had gotten hard at a glance because, despite his fucking exhaustion, his own dick had roared to life. “I know damn well you were fixating on her kitty underneath.”

  “And you weren’t? Please…”

  “No. I’m guilty as hell. But I’m willing to admit it.”

  “Of course I wanted to fuck her. Is that really news?” He sighed again, the sound dripping frustration. “Now go to sleep. It’s been a long damn day.”

  “No shit.” Beck gnawed on the side of his cheek. Yeah, he should probably leave it alone, but he couldn’t. “If you’re so tired, why aren’t you already snoring?”

  Seth sat straight up. “Probably for the same reason you’re not. I’m in a hundred knots because everything is so fucked up and none of this shit changes how I feel about her. You know the funny part? Heavenly isn’t even my type.”

  Beck had to laugh. “Hell, she’s not my usual, either.”

  “What’s with that? I mean, I prefer women with a lot more experience. They’re usually more adventurous and they damn sure know what they want. I don’t even remember the last time I nailed one younger than me. I haven’t taken a virgin since high school.”

  “Well, I never have.”

  “Never? Really? No backseat action? No prom night nookie?”

  I went to prom with a hooker. “No. I always avoided them.”

  “Took a while, but I wised up too when I realized they always want a relationship.”

  Beck scoffed. “So, of course, we manage to find the one virgin who doesn’t.”

  Seth barked out a laugh. “Karma. That bitch must be kicking our asses. Because here we are… The girl we’re both desperate for is sleeping in the next room, and we’re out here having a sausage party.”

  Beck had to chuckle. “When you put it that way, we sound stupid and we should be totally ashamed.”

  “You’re not? Well, you have less to be humiliated about. After all, you’re not the schmuck who moved across the country after kissing Heavenly once and then discovered that she doesn’t see me in her future.” He shook his head. “What’s worse is that giving up again never crossed my mind. It’s like I took one look at that girl and—”

  “Had to have her?” Beck knew that feeling well. “Yep. I saw her and I just…knew. I told myself to stay away. She was too young, too sweet… We both know how well that worked. And I have no idea what the fuck happens next. I know what needs to happen.” He let loose a deep breath of tension. “I’m just not sure if either of us can handle it.”

  Beck felt more than saw Seth go tense. “You think you know? Do I even want to ask?”

  “Probably not. But I finally understand Heavenly.”

  “Oh, this ought to be good,” Seth drawled. “Enlighten me.”

  “Abel told us everything important. Did you get it?”

  Seth paused, like he was sorting through all the tidbits Heavenly’s father had spilled and zeroed in on what mattered most. “Hard to miss her mother walking out on a sick husband and heaping the responsibility for his care on a girl who wasn’t even old enough to drive. I’m against hitting a woman, but I might make an exception for that bitch.”

  “Exactly. The problem is, she left Heavenly with serious abandonment issues. That changes everything.”

  “Well, I guess it explains why she kept so much to herself. If she couldn’t even trust her own mother…” Seth shook his head. “I can’t fathom that. My mom and I are really close.”

  “Oh, her mom leaving explains a whole lot more, virtually everything we’ve been fighting since we met her. It’s most likely the reason she thinks we have no future. Hell, it’s probably even the reason she won’t choose between us.” Beck sat up and leaned his elbows on his knees. “You understand that we’re going to have to make the choice for her, right?”

  Seth stared warily. “You mean one of us is going to have to bow out?”

  “No,” Beck shot back. “She’s too fragile for that right now. If one of us left, it would reinforce her conviction that everyone leaves. She might break.”

  “You’re a surgeon, not a shrink. How can you be so sure that’s what she’d think?”

  Beck hesitated. He did not want to get into this. Not now, not ever. But Seth was sounding skeptical, and Beck needed him on board for Heavenly’s sake.

  “My mom abandoned me when I was a kid,” Beck confessed softly.

  “Oh, shit. How old were you?”

  “Too young. And I’ve said everything I intend to on that topic,” Beck bit out, slamming up walls to block the memories before they could surface.

  “Is that the reason I couldn’t find any record of you before you turned sixteen?”

  The PI’s words hit him with a blow far more powerful than any he’d unloaded on Sanchez. An icy chill froze Beck’s blood before hot rage burst through his veins, sending his heart thudding wildly against his ribs. “You fucking investigated me?”

  “Damn straight.”

  Sweat dotted Beck’s brow. What else had the nosy bastard uncovered?

  He stood and tossed the blanket on the sofa. “Stay the fuck out of my past.”

  “Why, because you’re worried I’ll tell Heavenly about your wife of eighteen years? Yeah, I found out about her. Granted, you filed for divorce a few weeks ago—finally. But give me one reason I shouldn’t just tell Heavenly and let the chips fall?”

  “Because it was a marriage of convenience, and the reasons for it are moot now. Because if you were any sort of PI, you’d have figured out that Gloria and I haven’t lived together for almost a decade. Because Heavenly needs you and me both, and nothing else—especially not this pissing contest—matters.” He sank back to the sofa. “How long have you known?”

  “I found out a few weeks ago, right before Heavenly blindsided us. I couldn’t wait to tell her. Oh, I was going to sleep with her first, make sure she was so into me that the news would convince her I was her obvious choice.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. “But if you’re right about her issues, that info could have really shaken her.”

  “So why didn’t you blurt it all out when you had Heavenly alone at your place?”

  “Besides the donkey interfering? Honestly, cheating manwhore didn’t seem like your speed. I wanted to hear your side first.” He shrugged. “I know you think otherwise, but I’m not a total prick.”

  That nearly left Beck speechless. “Thanks, man. It’s not my speed. I appreciate the benefit of the doubt.”

  Seth shrugged. “So what do we do now? You say we can’t walk away without crushing Heavenly, but she says she doesn’t see a future with either of us.”

  “She’s testing us. She may not even be aware of it, but I know the behavior. She’s pushing us to see how much we can take before we’ll get fed up and leave her.” Beck had been down this road, and he still shuddered when he thought of all the shit he’d heaped on Gloria until she’d verbally slapped his face and promised she was in his life to stay.

  “So if we want her, we have to convince her we’re not going anywhere? Christ… Then what? We have to hope she’ll naturally choose one of us in time?”

  “Once we help undo the damage her mother inflicted, maybe she will.” But Beck wasn’t holding his breath.

  “Okay, I can suck it up until she’s on more stable ground. Can you?”

  Beck pondered that question, internally weighing options that didn’t exist. “Tonight, I realized I’ll do anything in the world for her. It might be a good idea for you to consider what else you’re willing to do to make her happy.”

  Seth hesitated, and Beck suspec
ted the PI was listening between the lines. “Maybe it would be best if we slept on it and talked again in the morning.”

  “Sure, but I think we both know where this is going.”

  “Shut up.” Seth lay back again and tugged the blanket up to his neck. “And don’t snore.”

  Yeah, Beck wasn’t any happier about what likely came next…but that didn’t change a damn thing.

  On the far side of the unit, he heard the bedroom door open and whirled. Rustling told him that Seth turned toward the unexpected noise. The soft sounds of bare feet on the tile tiptoeing through the kitchen were unmistakable.

  “Heavenly?” he asked.

  “You all right?” Seth asked behind him.

  She stepped into the room, at the end of the sofa. Beck saw her shift her weight, glance between them, curl her arms around her waist. “I’m really tired, but I can’t sleep. I thought I heard voices and I hoped you were still awake.”

  Beck scooted closer and grabbed her hand. “Do you need to talk?”

  “It’s not that. I’m so used to sleeping with my dad breathing just a few feet away. The bed is really comfortable…but the room is too quiet.”

  It took less than half a second for him to grasp what she wanted. The air left his lungs. Motherfucker…

  Behind him, he could almost feel Seth tense. “Do you need one of us to stay with you until you fall asleep?”

  “Would you mind?” She sounded as if she hated to ask for the favor.

  Hell, she probably did.

  “No problem, angel.” Seth leapt to his feet.

  Beck swallowed a groan. As if the kitten nightgown hadn’t been temptation enough, now she wanted them to climb in bed with her and not fuck her brains out? Yeah. And he damn well intended to cuddle up with her, too, because there was no way Seth was crawling between the sheets alone with her. “We’ll both be happy to make you comfortable.”

  “Thanks,” she said softly as he stood.

  His cock seemed convinced it was going to play with her kitty, because the moment he came near her, the son of a bitch was primed and ready to go all night. He bit back a curse and told his overeager appendage to take a rest. Wasn’t happening. Without any conscious thought, Beck pressed his hand to the small of her back. It only excited his dick more.