The Humdrum Lives of Cryptids, Monsters, and Villains
Page 32
"Ugh," he said involuntarily as he raised his forearm from his eyes. The room seemed to spin. His wife's dark brown horse-like flanks were facing him and although he could not see her face, he was sure she was rolling her eyes at him as she adjusted her tunic and teased her long chestnut brown hair while her tail swished.
Mykonos struggled to roll his horse body off of the bed, placing his human hands against the wall to steady himself as his four long muscular legs trembled and struggled to remain stationary as the boat continued to pitch back and forth minutely. Finally, his hooves dug into the aquamarine carpet of their room. He was quite sure that the color schemes on the ship were not helping to abate the dizzy feeling that he had felt almost the entire time he had been on the ship.
Hilary had already lain out a tunic for him on the bed. It was a mixture of tan leathers pieced together to form a floral pattern. Mykonos did not understand why it was so important to wear clothes he would never usually wear just because he was on vacation. He put it on nonetheless and joined his wife who was waiting by the door.
"Are you alright?" she asked, somewhat exasperatedly. He knew that it must be frustrating for her to have to wait on him for everything. She had gotten her sea-hooves within the first ten minutes aboard the Cryptid Cruiseliner. He did not like holding her back from having a good time, but there was not much he could do about it.
"Yeah, I'm good. You lead the way," he said, following her out of their room. The bright sunlight attacked his vision as they walked onto the deck. He paused as his eyes adjusted, listening to the clop of his wife's hooves against the polished wood of the ship's deck. He blinked rapidly and began to walk. His equine knees wobbled with each step and he gripped the handrail tightly, taking care not to look over the edge of the ship. He was not afraid of heights, but seeing the motion of the waves caused his nausea to multiply.
Yeti children and jackelopes ran past him, laughing and yelling, having a great time. This vacation was supposed to be a celebration for Mykonos and his wife. Mykonos had successfully landed a big deal for his line of Centaur-specific footwear. His wife, in her excitement, had suggested that they take a cruise to celebrate the big news. Having never told her about his seasickness problem, and not wanting to tarnish her glee at the thought of going on a cruise he had agreed. He realized now that this would likely be the last time his wife suggested a cruise as a vacation, and that he should have been upfront with her. They were still getting the hang of the marriage thing.
"Hey, where are you going?" Mykonos asked as his wife made a turn from the staircase instead of the galley. "They galley is this way... Aren't we going to lunch?"
"Yes, but I thought it would be best if we ate on land for this meal. We're taking a boat to one of the islands," she said as she began to awkwardly descend the spiral staircase leading to the lower decks. The Cryptid Cruiseliner's brochure had explicitly stated that it accommodated centaurs, but Mykonos and Hilary were less than impressed with the ease of mobility provided throughout the ship for their horse-like bodies.
The two of them finally made it down the spiral staircase and approached the boat that would take them to the shore of the island. It bobbed up and down violently in the waves, and Mykonos could already feel his stomach begin to turn. Hilary patted him on his shoulder, held his hand, and walked him into the boat. He and Hilary had to stand up in the back of the boat as no seats were large enough for them. This actually worked out well since he could stand by an open window. The cool air at least eased his nausea a bit.
It did not ease his nausea enough, however. He succumbed to his illness shortly after they launched from the cruiseliner, grateful that he was able to be sick into the sea out of the window rather than in the boat. The ride was even too much for his wife, who also became seasick. They both clumsily exited the boat as it reached the dock, and stood panting on the wooden planks until they were able to walk straight once more.
"Okay, if you've been feeling like that the whole trip, I understand why you haven't been very active," his wife said as they slowly began to gambol down the boardwalk.
"It's been bad, but not quite that bad. Are you alright?" he asked. She still looked a little green in the face and her four knees shook a bit as she walked.
"I'll feel a lot better when I get some food and a cold drink, I think."
"I think that goes for both of us!"
Being on dry, stationary land made all the difference after a few minutes. The two were laughing and chatting as they exited the boardwalk and sank their hooves into the sand covered beach. They paused for a moment to look out over the waves crashing into the shore. There were a group of young sea serpents body boarding, and a sasquatch was attempting to surf but not having much luck.
After they walked down the beach for a few hundred yards, they encountered a small cafe right on the edge of the beach. It was made to look like a tiki hut, and the entire front of the cafe was open to the sea breeze. They sat down at the very edge of the cafe, so they could continue to cover their hooves in the sand.
"Aloha, welcome to the Island Cryptid Cafe," a werewolf wearing sunglasses, a straw fedora, and a Hawaiian button up shirt growled at the pair of them as she approached the table. "What may I get for you?"
Mykonos was unsure of what to get. This had been a problem during meals throughout the vacation for several reasons. First of all was the time difference. It was lunch time where they were, but in his home time zone it was time for dinner already. His body wanted dinner type meals during vacation time lunches. Another problem was the fact that he had to plan for the inevitability that whatever he ate had a high likelihood it would come up again once he returned to the Cryptid Cruiseliner. His stomach began to turn just thinking about boarding the ship again with a full stomach.
"What is it that smells so good?" Hilary asked the werewolf waitress. Mykonos had to agree that the scent in the cafe was absolutely intoxicating. They both had a weakness for baked goods. It seemed that all cryptids did.
"Those are the world famous Cryptid Cafe scones. They are served with complimentary pineapple slices at this location," the waitress snarled. Even when werewolves were being polite, it was quite frightening. The two of them were aware of the original Cryptid Cafe and its legendary flaky yet substantial scones, but had never tried them. Hilary ordered one along with a glass of Island Iced Tea, and Mykonos ordered two and a glass or regular unsweetened tea.
"Coming right up," the waitress said, her yellow bloodshot eyes glaring about wildly in her head as she left their table.
They looked across the waves and shared a silence as they anxiously awaited their scones and teas. Mykonos was feeling completely normal again and started to contemplate his training. He was planning a promotional event for his line of Centaur shoes in which he would run from the east coast to the west coast wearing one pair of his shoes. They were basing it on a "Sea to Shining Sea" tagline, and he was quite sure it was going to be a hit, likely becoming one of those memorable ad campaigns that a whole generation of cryptids would reflect back fondly on someday.
Mykonos was already an accomplished long distance runner, but running from coast to coast would be no easy task, even for a centaur. He had been training hard in anticipation of the upcoming event, but had been unable to train while on the cruiseliner due to his seasickness. He felt as though his legs were already growing weaker, though he was not sure if this was all in his head or if it was really the case.
The scones, teas, and pineapple were delivered a few moments later by the snarling werewolf adorned in island garb and the two centaurs began to eat. The scones really did live up to their reputation. Mykonos and Hilary vowed to visit the Cryptid Cafe on the mainland when they returned home.
"You know," Mykonos began, his voice filled with optimism, "I think I'm going to do some training when we get back to the crusieliner."
Hilary eyed him suspiciously and took time in chewing her scone. "Do you really think that's a good idea? You've barely even be
en able to sit through a meal on the ship, let alone train to run across the country..."
Maybe he was being foolish, but in that moment he felt that he was capable. "I know it's been rough on me, but I've got to give it a try. I can't be out of shape when we return to the mainland. I really don't want to postpone the ad campaign."
"Alright..." she said skeptically. "We should get back to the ship."
Mykonos left a few Crypto Units on the table to cover their meal and the tip and they exited the Island Cryptid Cafe, holding hands as they walked down the beach, leaving a trail of hoof prints as they walked through the sand. The boardwalk was alive with sound and activity as they exited the beach. All of the other vacationers were trying to re-board the ships that would take them back to the Cryptid Cruiseliner as well.
A family of jackelopes dashed right between their legs, cutting them in line and entering the boat they were waiting to board.
"All full!" cried the captain of the small ship, a tall, weathered sasquatch.
"They cut us in line! Is there no way we can get on this one? We've been waiting for - ," Mykonos tried to reason with the captain, but it just was not going to happen.
"I said 'all full', sir, and I meant 'all full'. You can wait for the next one." The