by Blue Saffire
Nicole
I haven’t been able to stop smiling all week. Caleb is like a big old sweet teddy bear. After our coffee date, Caleb took me to the movies that next night. It was one of the best dates I ever had.
I wasn’t surprised when Cameron and Kay tagged along. I get that Cameron is protective over his little brother. I think that’s where Caleb gets his possessiveness over me.
Not possessive in a creepy way, but Caleb is watchful and protective, when we’re out. I think he likes to keep me close in case he reads something wrong at first glance. I can understand that.
However, on our date, Cameron being there seemed to relax Caleb. I watched him turn into a different person from the guy that I had coffee with. Not in a bad way.
Whether he notices it or not, Caleb doesn’t second guess himself as much when his brother is around. They’re the epitome of twins. Moving in sync, finishing the other’s thoughts.
I have wondered repeatedly, if Caleb has done better than most because of his twin. I did, however, pick up on Caleb’s struggle with humor. Although, that doesn’t stop Cameron from being humorous.
While Caleb may struggle with picking up sarcasm, he is good at tossing it back out. I love that. He has caused me to double over in stitches a few times, and the way his eyes sparkle with joy each time tugs at my heart.
So far, we’ve been on a date every night this week. Tomorrow will be the first night we won’t be going on one. Only because Caleb has a game. I haven’t been able to turn him down for a date, not that I want to.
I feel foolish now for my initial reservations about dating Caleb. It hasn’t been easy or perfect, but we are making it work. Through frustrations and all.
One source of both our frustration has been text messaging. Caleb tends to take my response time to heart, when I take too long to answer back, after he’s said something he’s unsure of.
For example, just this morning. He texted me just before I jumped in the shower. I replied to his first text, but I was in the shower before I saw the second.
Caleb: Good morning, Gorgeous.
Me: Good morning, Handsome.
I preceded to my shower with a smile on my face. When I returned from my shower, I found a string of texts from Caleb, going from sweet to frantic.
Caleb: I miss you.
Caleb: Was that too much?
Caleb: I’m sorry, Nicole. That’s too much too soon.
Caleb: Baby, are we okay?
Caleb: I hope I didn’t freak you out.
Caleb: Fuck, I’m fucking this up.
Each message was a minute or less apart. I had to call him to squish the storm he was creating in his head. The phone rung once before he picked up my call. I couldn’t help smiling, when I heard his voice.
“Hello, I —,” I cut him off right away.
“Babe, I miss you, too. I was in the shower. I didn’t see your messages, until just now,” I giggled.
“Oh,” Caleb sighed. “I’m sorry.”
“Hush, Caleb. You did nothing wrong. I’ll see you in class. Later, okay,” I said with a smile in my voice.
“Nicole,” he called before I could hang up.
“Yes.”
“Thanks, Darlin’.”
“For what?” I asked in confusion.
“For trying with me,” he said, blowing another hole through my heart.
Caleb has been doing a lot of that. Blowing clear through my heart. Making it impossible not to care for him. Impossible not to fall for him.
So, yup, I, Nicole, have had a perpetual smile on my face for this entire week. Not even the snarling girls on campus have been able to dampen my mood. Oh, they’re snarling alright. Caleb and Cameron walk me to all of my classes, when they’re not at practice.
Caleb is not shy about handing my hand as we walk the campus. Having Cameron and Dakota around has just become the norm. I’m used to it.
“You know, your lips are going to fall off if you keep smiling so hard,” Taylor teases.
“Oh, God, I thought it was just me,” Maribel groans. “I keep getting asked out by these lames and here miss itty bitty cutie comes and steals my man right from under my nose.”
I laugh and throw my head back. “Does Caleb know about this,” I giggle.
“I was working up the nerve to tell him. He can be scary sometimes, you know,” Maribel says as she fans herself. “That’s what makes him so hot.”
“I can’t,” I roll my eyes and zip my camera up.
“So, you’re going to his game, right,” Taylor asks.
“She’s his girlfriend, she has too,” Joelle sings, with stars in her eyes.
“We’re just dating. There are no titles. Besides, I’m not sure if he wants me at his game. He hasn’t asked me,” I shrug.
All eyes grow large and look over my head. I can feel his warmth before he stops behind me. My cheeks hurt from smiling, when I feel his arm wrap around my waist and my body tugged back into his.
“I missed you,” he murmurs into my neck, as he buries his face there.
I turn to face him, craning my neck to look up at him. I swear I get lost in those blue-grey eyes. Caleb takes my bags, and I wrap my arms around his waist.
“I missed you, too,” I purr up at him.
Caleb dips his head and pecks my lips. His eyes remain on my lips and I know he wants more. I also know that if he is going to walk me to my dorm he has to be quick about it so he’s not late for practice.
I move to his side and take his free hand. It’s then that I notice my friends looking dreamy eyed. Then, Cameron standing with his arms folded over his chest, while shaking his head.
“What,” I shrug.
“If I’m late for practice. I just want you to know, I’m kicking your boyfriend’s ass,” Cameron grumbles with a smirk on his lips.
“She’s not my girlfriend, yet,” Caleb says, but clamps his mouth shut, as he notices the girls watching him.
“You guys would make such a cute couple,” Taylor gushes.
“I’ll see you guys later,” I sing and wave as I tug Caleb along with me.
I feel Caleb looking down at me, causing me to look up and smile at him. When I see the intense look in his eyes, I wrinkle my brows. I can nearly see the gears turning in his head.
“What?”
“You don’t think we would make a cute couple?”
I smile at him. “Yes, I think we would make a cute couple. I just didn’t want my friends badgering us. We’ll do things when we’re ready,” I chirp.
Caleb nods. We walk in silence the rest of the way to my dorm, but I can feel him thinking. I try my best not to rush him. I will never forget that time he had that meltdown, because I pushed him before he was ready.
Cameron stops in the common area on my floor, while Caleb walks me to my dorm room door. I open my door and reach out my hand for my things. Caleb hands them over, but he inches me into the room, by crowding my smaller body.
I step back, allowing him in. He looks so nervous, I’m not sure what he is about to say. I watch as he clenches and unclenches his fists.
“I...,” he closes his eyes and blows out a breath.
I move closer and wrap my arms around his waist. I remember when he told me, my touch calms him. When his eyes open, he looks at me with so many emotions warring.
“Just spit it out, Caleb. It’s just us,” I say softly.
“I want you to come to my game. I want you to come see me play. Tomorrow night, will you come to my game?”
I beam up at him. “Of course, I will.”
Caleb cups the sides of my face and devours my lips. I feel like he is trying to drink from the souls of my soul. I moan and he groans pressing his hard body into mine.
We only pull apart at the sound of the knock on my door. I know it’s Cameron. They’re going to be late for practice if they don’t get going.
“Fuck,” Caleb grunts as he places his forehead to mine. “We’re still meeting at our coffee shop later, right?”
/>
“Oh, okay, if you want to. I didn’t think we were going to.”
Caleb nods. “After my dinner at Coach’s house. I’m going to miss you like crazy.”
“The sooner you go, the sooner it will be later,” I giggle.
“You’re lying, but I’m leaving,” Caleb smiles.
It’s such a beautiful smile I’m bereft when it falls from his face and he turns to leave. Cameron knocks once more as Caleb reaches for the knock and pulls the door open. I smirk as Cameron looks in and wiggles his brows at me.
“Let’s go,” Caleb says and pulls the door close behind him.
I sigh. Suddenly, nerves and anticipation take over. I’m going to my first game as Caleb Perry’s…what? I frown. I think I understand how Caleb felt on the walk over.
I touch my whisker burned lips. With kisses like that, Caleb needs to have some type of title in my life. I smirk, as a few thoughts take root. I’ll have this handled before the night is out.
For now, I have to put together an outfit for our date tonight and another for Caleb’s game tomorrow. No matter my status, I want to be representing my boo tomorrow night.
~B~
Caleb
I’ve been a mix of anxious and unsure all day. Or maybe I can explain it better as being nervous. I like Nicole a lot. I crave being around her.
It drives me crazy, when Cameron starts to tell me I need to give Nicole space to breathe. I try not to text her all the time, which is starting to look like a better idea every day. I thought I totally fucked up this morning.
Reading a text message is worse than trying to read people for me. Long pauses between messages, or the way things are worded can trip me up. It’s happened with Nicole more than once, but she handles it without freaking out on me.
I know I’m falling for her. My mom has always told me I wouldn’t understand love, so not to get my hopes up of ever having a wife or a real girlfriend. That shit pissed Cameron off. That’s when he started to take it upon himself to hook me up with girls.
Cameron wanted to know my limits and we found them alright. For a long time, I’ve thought my mother to be right. Not anymore. Now I know. I know I have feelings growing for Nicole.
I won’t tell her though. I don’t want to scare her off. That leads me to my current anxiety. I want to make things official. I hate not knowing that Nicole is mine. I want to be able to call her my girl.
I know we’ve only been going on dates for a week, but I only want her. I’ve been amped up since this morning, when Nicole told me she would come to my game. I want to be able to introduce her to my family as my girl.
I pull the tie from my neck and climb into the car with Cameron. We’ve just finished having dinner at Coach’s house. Coach Snider is an old high school friend of my uncle and dad’s.
He’s like a God father of sorts. He has known me since I was a baby. Coach Derrick Snider has done everything he can to help me adjust here at college and on the team. He often has Cameron and me over to see how I’m doing and what he can do to help.
“You know Coach is right,” Cameron says as we pull out of the gates to Coach’s gated community.
“Yeah,” I sigh. “I get what he’s saying, but I don’t want to become a gimmick and I don’t want you giving up anything else for me. You’re good on your own.”
Cameron snorts. “Fucking right, I am,” he says with a smirk.
I turn my eyes to my brother. “You’re joking about this,” I say as more of a statement. “We both know you’re as good as me, but you don’t want to play ball. You only play because of me. You’ve never wanted to go pro. That’s even more reason not to try this.”
Cameron shrugs his shoulders. “Can I be honest with you, Caleb?”
“Only thing I understand, Cam,” I reply.
“I’ve lived my whole life trying to be there for you. Doing what I had to for my little brother. You’re right. I don’t necessarily want to play ball in the long run. But honestly, I’ve been in your shadow for so long, I don’t know what I want to do,” Cameron glance over at me for a second then looks back at the road.
“My shadow,” I murmur as I filter in all his words. “I’ve always felt like I’m the one living in your shadow. Trying to do things the way you do them, because that’s the right way. The way Mom and Dad want it.”
“Caleb, you’re the most incredible person I know. You could never live in my fucking shadow, because you’re such a better man than me. So, if this is what you want. If you need me to play, so you can play, I’m all over that shit.”
I shake my head. “No, Cam, that’s not what I want. I want to play, but I want to do this on my own. If a team wants us both fine. If you decide you want to go pro, great, but not because of me.
“I think it’s time we both do the shit we want. No more living for Mom and Dad. We live for us. No more stealing from each other to please them,” I say with clinched fist.
“I knew she was good for you,” Cameron says after a long pause.
“What?”
“Nicole, she’s good for you. You’ve changed in this short time. She’s right for you. That’s something I’ve never been able to figure out for you. I’m glad you’re doing this, dating,” Cameron flickers his eyes over to me. “You hold onto her. Relationships are hard, but that one right there. You fight for her, even if it means fighting your own head.”
I just nod as I take in his words. We’re silent for the rest of the drive to the coffee shop. The little shop has become our spot. Or at least, I think of it that way.
My heart knocks hard in my chest as Cameron and I sit waiting for Nicole to show up. This is technically my Junior year, although I’m several credits ahead of my degree. I have a lot of decisions to make. Cameron and I are being watched and there’s been a lot of talk of us walking away from our college career this year.
To be honest, I should have been in the league by now. There’s been interest in me since high school. We all just knew I wasn’t ready for that then. My social skills were rough to say the least.
“Ah, fuck,” Cameron groans beside me, as he looks up from his phone.
I follow his eyes to see what has his face looking like he smells something sour. When I find the source of the look on his face, I understand the look. Leslie, one of my old hook up is headed our way.
I can’t say I regret much. I’ve never understood the concept until I started fucking Leslie. Not that she was a bad lay. It’s the shit that has come with said lay.
Leslie got the rules, no kissing, no touching, and no commits or conversation. What she has seemed to stop understanding is the no commits and no conversation part. I’m not stupid. I can hold a conversation. Actually, that’s one of the issues.
I’m extremely smart. Leslie is a complete airhead. The things that interest me go over her head. One time, Dakota had to run to the bathroom in the mall, and Cameron and Kay had taken off.
I stood with a physics magazine in my hand reading an article I’d been waiting to get my hands on. I swear Leslie walked up, pointing to my magazine and started talking about physiques.
I remember standing there looking at her with more than my usual confusion. When Dakota came back from the bathroom, she laughed in her face. It was then that I figured it out, I was not the confused one.
“Hey, Cameron,” Leslie chirps, she then turns her eyes to me and purrs breathlessly. “Hi, Caleb.”
“I’m waiting for someone. You’re blocking my view,” I reply and blink at her.
Cameron chuckles and shakes his head. “For once, I can say I love that shit,” he mutters under his breath. “Listen Leslie, this isn’t a good time. We’ll see you around.”
Leslie pouts and gets ready to open her mouth, but I spot Nicole crossing the street outside the window. I stand and head out of the café. I don’t even hear whatever it is Leslie says, or Cameron’s response.
Nicole’s eyes light up when she sees me and she tugs her scarf down from over her face. I open my arms an
d she leaps into them. I feel my heart burst as my arms envelop around her.
Her small hands cup my ears and she pulls my face down to meet hers. I tilt my head so my baseball cap doesn’t peck her in the face. When my lips meet hers, I feel the day wash away.
Everything that has been weighing on me feels like background noise. Background noise, that for once in my life I can filter out. I don’t feel the pressure of hiding or of trying to be perfect. I stop thinking about all the stuff Cameron gives up for me.
I take my time kissing her soft, sweet lips, moving one hand to her hair to keep her with me. My fingers curl into the back of her locks, pulling a sexy moan from deep inside her. When I grow hard against her belly, Nicole pulls away.
A little smile is on her lips, as her breath poofs out before her face. “I missed you too, Caleb,” she giggles.
I place her on her feet and put a little distance between us. My eyes swipe over her. She’s changed her clothes since this afternoon. She now has on a black pea coat and a thick grey knit scarf.
When my eyes land on her legs, peeking out from under her coat. I see that her thick shapely legs are covered in black tights, with heart designs. On her small feet are suede grey heeled ankle boots.
“I missed you more than I think I should tell you,” I murmur.
“Whatever, Caleb,” she laughs and places her hand in mine. “Oh, my God, it was just eighty-three degrees yesterday. It’s freezing out here.”
Nicole gently tugs me towards the coffee shop. When I see her shiver slightly, I release her fingers and pull her little body into my side, wrapping my arm around her.
I bend to kiss the top of her head and she looks up at me with that smile. I love that smile. I give her a gentle squeeze, as we stop in front of the counter in the coffee shop.
“Can I have a hot chocolate and two lemon squares,” I say to the barista.
“Sure Perry,” the lanky guy behind the corner says.
I squint at him trying to place where I know him from. Before I can place him, he’s off to get our order. I’m still fixed on figuring it out, when Nicole tugs on my dress shirt.
“You’re a baseball star,” Nicole says softly. “You may not know him, but he wants to feel like he knows you.”
