Waiting on Tuesday

by Bella Settarra

  “I suppose he was right about being culpable for our own actions,” she mused thoughtfully.

  That reminded her of herself, but in a different way. How she had to find herself a job before she could move away. It was very important to her to become self-sufficient so she’d never have to go back. That was a promise she’d made to herself on a particularly awful day when she had spent several hours in that dank cellar, crying and wishing she were dead. Had she gone through with it then, she wouldn’t be here now, with such a wonderful man, feeling so warm and safe.

  “You’re a very independent woman aren’t you, Tuesday?”

  His question surprised her. “I have to be, Master Dan. If I don’t look after meself no one else is going to.”

  He chuckled. “Would you like someone to look after you?” He was twirling her hair through his fingers as he spoke.

  She gulped, not sure what he meant. “It’s not an option for me, Master Dan,” she told him firmly.

  “Why?”

  She sighed. “I can’t afford to be settling down. I need to keep on me toes, you know? I don’t know how long I can stay in one place before… before I get bored and have to move on.” Silently cursing herself for saying too much, she pretended to yawn, hoping to put an end to the questions.

  “Bored? You’ve been at Collar and Cuffs for, what, a couple of years now. You’re full time with both bars and the restaurant. Would you really want to give all that up?” He sounded surprised.

  “Never say never, Master Dan. Nothing lasts forever. You have to be ready for change when it happens, that’s all I’m sayin’.”

  They lay quietly for a few minutes. Tuesday closed her eyes as she listened to the regular beat of Dan’s heart. She found it soothing and couldn’t resist cuddling him a little closer.

  It was he who broke the silence. “Who are you running from, little one?”

  CHAPTER TEN

  Tuesday was surprised to find herself still in Master Dan’s arms when she awoke the next morning. She had a crick in her neck and stretched slightly to try to get comfortable.

  “Good morning, sleepyhead.” His voice was gentle, and she looked up to see his eyes twinkling as he watched her.

  She grinned. “Master Dan?” It was wonderful to wake up next to him, and she suddenly wished she could wake up like this every day.

  “In the flesh, little one,” he assured her. “I’m glad you’re awake, I didn’t want to disturb you, but I’m dying for a coffee.”

  He kissed the top of her head before sliding out of the bed. She couldn’t help noticing his tented boxers as he made his way to the door, and she guessed it wasn’t just the coffee he was desperate for.

  She crawled out of bed herself and went to take a shower. As the warm water caressed her tired body, her thoughts went back to last night. She had enjoyed having Dan in bed with her; it felt safe and warm. She had pretended to be asleep once the questions became too uncomfortable though. She knew she had told him too much already and there was no way she was going to tell him all about her past. A nagging voice in her head told her she was being unfair, that he already told you about his past, but there was nothing she could do about it now.

  Wrapping herself up in a massive, soft towel she wandered back into the bedroom and took a look in the closet. It was hard to believe Dan had gone to so much trouble for her. She selected a pair of jeans and a pretty white top as well as a matching set of white lace underwear. She felt like a different person in the new clothes and peered at her reflection as she combed her damp hair. Somehow she even looked different today. She peered closer.

  She realized she wasn’t frowning, and her face was much more relaxed than normal. She had to admit that she actually looked pretty.

  The smell of coffee welcomed her into the kitchen. Dan had also taken a shower and dressed already.

  “I usually have croissants for breakfast, but I can cook you something else if you prefer?” he offered.

  Tuesday smiled. Dan looked more relaxed today too.

  “Just coffee for me, thanks. I don’t eat breakfast.”

  “You should,” he told her.

  Tuesday felt a burn inside her stomach. Not only was he looking absolutely gorgeous in his Levi’s and black muscle shirt, but his dominant manner made her insides flip.

  “Yes, Sir,” she murmured as she took a seat at the breakfast bar.

  He looked at her over his shoulder and smiled.

  She watched as Master Dan moved effortlessly around the room, pouring coffee and taking the warm croissants from the oven. He placed the food on the table and brought over the steaming mugs.

  “What have you got planned for today?” she asked as he sat opposite her.

  “I’ve arranged to work from home. I’ve got quite a bit of following-up to do on several of the new members. Some of them seem to have appeared from nowhere.” He hesitated for a minute, but then seemed to make up his mind about something. “I can’t find any details on them at all. I don’t know what the boss is playing at, to be honest. Oh, and I might have to go in and monitor the dungeon later, but I’m hoping Master Nathan or Master Steve will cover it for me.”

  “It’s not usually your night for duty.” Tuesday was well aware of when Master Dan would be on duty at the club—she looked forward to those nights.

  He sighed, taking a bite of his warm croissant. “No, it’s Brad’s, but as he’s on vacation, I need to cover the shift.”

  Tuesday frowned. “On vacation? He told me he was going to have a busy week helping you vet all the newbies. And he’s got a table reserved at the restaurant for tomorrow night along with his mam and dad. It’s their Diamond Anniversary or something, I think Master Dominic said.”

  She was surprised to see Dan’s head snap up. He stared at her, stunned. “So this vacation wasn’t planned then? I thought it was odd that he’d just disappeared off the face of the earth!”

  “He’s going to Cuba in the summer. He’s been going on and on about it for ages. Surely if he was planning another vacation before that he would have mentioned it by now,” Tuesday mused as she drank her coffee.

  Master Dan’s face clouded over, and she was afraid she might have annoyed him by bringing up the subject.

  “Sorry, Master Dan, I didn’t mean to…”

  “No, no, it’s fine,” he assured her. “I knew something wasn’t right about him disappearing like that. I just need to make a phone call. Excuse me.”

  She nodded as he rose from the counter and disappeared out the door. Tuesday dug in to the croissants. They were so buttery and delicious she was starting to rethink her stance on breakfast. Afterwards she cleared away the pots and wiped down the counter before going to look for Master Dan.

  “That’s what I figured,” he was saying. “Who takes a vacation without scheduling it in their diary? And with his folks’ anniversary this week too. I think we need to have another word with Dexter. Something’s very wrong here.”

  Dan paused for a moment, then replied with a begrudging, “I’d love to, buddy, but I’ve got Tuesday with me.”

  She felt sick knowing she was wrecking his plans. She was just about to interrupt and tell him she was quite happy to go back home when he spoke again.

  “Yeah, that could work. She’s got the counselor coming in about twenty minutes so give us a couple of hours. I’m sure she won’t mind. Probably itching to catch up with her friends again anyhow, you know Tuesday.” He chuckled before agreeing with whatever the person on the other end was saying, and hung up.

  Tentatively opening the study door, Tuesday stared over at him. He looked gorgeous sitting behind a large desk, leaning back in his chair with his hands clasped on top of his head. She had often seen him do that when he was figuring out something at the club. He smiled when he saw her.

  “Sorry, little one. I didn’t mean to abandon you.” He held out a hand for her, and she swiftly went over to him. She was a little surprised when he casually pulled her onto his lap, but not disple
ased. “How would you feel about going to the club later on? Not to work, just to say hi to the girls.”

  Tuesday gasped. “Sure, that would be grand.”

  “Good. I’ve got a little bit of business I need to attend to with Master Nathan. It shouldn’t take long, but should give you time to assure them all that you’re OK. Summer and April were pretty upset when they heard what happened.”

  Tuesday swallowed hard. She hadn’t really thought about her ordeal since last night. Everything had been so new and different today that it had taken her mind off of all that.

  “Will I have to tell them all about it?” she whispered.

  She felt him hold her a little closer. “Only if you want to, little one. They know basically what happened anyway, so you won’t have to go through it all with them. Mind you, Paulette might be a different matter.” He suddenly checked his watch as he spoke. “She’ll be here soon. I thought you might want to use the living room. I’ll keep out of the way for a while.”

  He moved slightly and she hopped off his knee. She had forgotten the counselor was coming today. So much for not having to think about what happened!

  The doorbell chimed and they both went through to the hall. Paulette beamed at Dan and Tuesday couldn’t help smirking. Paulette was about as immune to Dan’s charm and gorgeous good looks as she herself was. He took her coat and showed them both through.

  “I’ll fetch some coffee,” he promised as he left them.

  “Well, Tuesday, you look much better today. How are you feeling?” Paulette asked as she sat in the large armchair.

  “I feel great,” Tuesday replied with a smile as she took her place on one of the sofas. “I had a good night’s sleep and feel grand now.”

  “She had a nightmare.” Dan returned with the coffee and cookies which he set on the table between the two women.

  Paulette whipped out her notebook. “What about?”

  Tuesday chewed her lip in annoyance. She wasn’t planning on mentioning that. “I don’t remember,” she said with a shrug and grabbed a cup of coffee.

  “Well, she was screaming ‘let me out’ and calling for her daddy,” Dan revealed, placing a cup next to Paulette.

  “Daddy? So it wasn’t the man at the club you were dreaming about.” Paulette scribbled something in her book. “Where is your daddy? Is he local?”

  Tuesday felt a thud in her stomach. “He’s dead.”

  She watched both of their faces fall as she sipped her coffee.

  “You didn’t mention that yesterday?”

  “It didn’t come up.”

  “I’ll go. Let you ladies talk in peace,” Dan offered as he made for the door. “Just call if you need anything. I’ll be in my study.”

  Tuesday seethed. He had done enough damage for one day.

  “How long ago did you lose your father?” Paulette asked quietly.

  “Not that long ago. I don’t really want to talk about him. I thought you wanted to talk about the incident at the club again.” Tuesday shrugged.

  “All right. Have you thought any more about it?” Paulette asked patiently.

  “No. I’d actually forgotten all about it until you came,” she replied. “Do I have to rake it all up again? It’s just that I don’t really see the point.” She was trying to hide her anger, but knew she wasn’t doing a very good job.

  “The point is to help you get over it,” Paulette explained slowly. “And maybe help you come to terms with your father’s death as well. It must be very hard going through all this right on top of your bereavement.”

  “It’s not right on top of anything and my daddy’s death has nothing to do with you. You were supposed to be here because of that fuckwad at the club—nothing else! And I’m over him anyhow so I really don’t think you’re needed here, do you?” Tuesday slammed her cup on the table as she laid into the poor woman, and was shocked when the door burst open.

  “Tuesday!” Master Dan looked furious.

  She felt herself shaking, and wasn’t sure if it was anger or fear. She stared up at Master Dan.

  “Go into my study.” His voice was clipped, and she knew not to argue.

  Quickly she got up and left the room. She could hear Master Dan talking to Paulette. He sounded apologetic, which made her feel slightly ashamed. She was still angry though. She stood in front of the large desk, remembering the last time she was here, not even an hour ago, sitting on Master Dan’s lap. The door slammed shut, and he took his seat. Gone was the relaxed, gorgeous Master Dan of earlier, and here was the angry—but still gorgeous—manager from the club.

  “Why?” His question took the air from her lungs.

  She had expected him to shout at her, but he looked more disappointed than angry now. She felt a burn in her stomach.

  “She was supposed to be here because of the guy at the club. She started talking about my daddy again,” she mumbled.

  “So you shouted at her?”

  She huffed. “I told her already that I didn’t want to talk about him. He’s none of her business. That’s not why she’s here.”

  “Sit down, Tuesday.” He looked exasperated now, and she found it really difficult to make eye contact with him. Her face burned with shame.

  She sat down. “I’m sorry, Master Dan. I didn’t mean to be rude. I just didn’t want to talk about him, that’s all.” She wrung her hands in her lap.

  “I had no idea you lost your dad recently. You didn’t take any time off from the club.” His voice was quiet and gentle now.

  Tuesday gulped. “There was no point. He was already dead when they told me.”

  “So you didn’t go to the funeral?”

  She shook her head, looking down at her hands. She felt herself blush harder and was annoyed to think she might actually be feeling ashamed about something as trivial as missing the funeral.

  He leaned forward across the desk. “Tuesday, it might help to talk about it. Paulette’s here to help you in any way she can. If that means talking about things other than the incident at the club then that’s fine. You can talk to her about anything. Please let her help you.”

  Her head shot up, and she stared into his big blue eyes. He looked tearful almost, like he was pleading with her. She guessed that this was another conversation he had had with his wife. He had tried to get her to have counseling, but she refused it and then killed herself. His angry reaction made a lot more sense, Tuesday thought, if he thought she was willing to do the same.

  “Master Dan, I know you’re worried about me, but really you needn’t be. I’m fine. I’m over this already. I really don’t need to be talking over and over the same old stuff. That’s not how I am. I appreciate you getting the counselor in for me, but look at me, I’m grand. I don’t need any help.”

  “Does that mean you won’t speak to her? Should I ask her to go?” His words cut through her like a knife. She felt tears threatening, and her cheeks burned with shame. Not because of the topic of conversation, but because she felt like she was letting Master Dan down. She wanted to please him so much it hurt. She couldn’t bear the idea of failing him… She sighed.

  “I’ll do whatever you want me to do,” she told him slowly. “If you want me to go out there and talk to that woman then I will.”

  She watched his expression change in an instant. He looked relieved and surprised. He seemed to relax slightly as he sat up straight in his chair.

  “Thank you.” His voice wasn’t much more than a whisper, but it was enough.

  Tuesday closed her eyes momentarily as the realization hit her. He was her Dom, and she was to do what he wanted because it was what she wanted.

  She heard him stand up and quickly opened her eyes and followed him out of the room.

  Paulette was drinking her coffee quietly as Tuesday went to join her. Dan waited outside.

  “Paulette, I’m sorry for being rude to you,” Tuesday offered, knowing that he was listening. “I didn’t want to talk about my daddy, that’s all. I shouldn’t have said it
the way I did. I apologize.”

  Paulette’s expression turned to her school-mistress, pious look, and she nodded. “Thank you, Tuesday.”

  She took her seat opposite the counselor and heard Master Dan’s footsteps as he returned to his office, obviously satisfied.

  The rest of the session wasn’t as bad as she had feared. Tuesday managed to avoid talking about her father for most of the time, and they just chatted generally about her childhood. She realized that she actually had many happy times that she’d forgotten about, and enjoyed recalling them to the counselor.

  She was almost sad when Paulette announced that it was time for her to leave. The woman was a good listener and really appeared interested in what Tuesday was telling her. Tuesday wasn’t used to that, although, she realized, this was what she had craved all her life.

  Dan had already fixed them some lunch, and she joined him after saying good-bye to Paulette. She was relieved to see that he was no longer annoyed with her, and they chatted over their meal.

  “So you won’t mind seeing her again, then?” he asked with a grin.

  Tuesday sighed. “If you really want me to I will,” she promised, “though I still think it’s a bit of a waste of money. I can chat to you or the girls for free; I don’t need a stranger to talk to.”

  He shook his head. “You’ll be surprised how much she can help you, little one. Just give her a chance.”

  Tuesday nodded. Although not totally convinced, she trusted Master Dan and knew that he believed what he was saying and that was enough for her. She studied the handsome Dom. He was clearly concerned about her and for that she was truly grateful, but she couldn’t help wondering if that was all that was troubling him.

  Dan picked aimlessly at his meal. His tongue trifled with his bottom lip absent-mindedly while his long fingers caressed the glass in his hand. He frowned thoughtfully, and Tuesday mused that she would give anything to know just what those thoughts were about…