God School

by Scott Kinkade

  Fair enough, he supposed. “But what exactly do you do at this school?”

  “As I said, we train you to become a god.”

  “So…what? You infuse me with your power?” Ev asked.

  Brandon shook his head. “Not exactly. Part of the reason we protect Mt. Oleia is because it’s a focal point.”

  “Focal point?”

  “That’s right. You see, there are areas of the universe where vast reserves of energy left over from the Big Bang collect. We call them Ultimus Points. If someone hangs around that energy long enough, they’ll become a god. We have to make sure they’re sufficiently prepared to become divine.”

  Ev almost found it funny. “So gods are basically superheros?”

  “Not even close, kid. We don’t save the life of everyone in danger. We have to judge when it’s that person’s time. Gods have far more responsibility than comic book characters. We must listen to the prayers of millions, and decide how to answer them.”

  “Yeah, but—”

  Ev’s words were cut off by the power being cut off. The room was plunged into darkness. Only the lights outside the window provided any illumination.

  “Looks like we’re out of time,” Brandon said. “They’re here.”

  Ev was about to ask Who’s here? when a strange rasping began throughout the room. It didn’t take him long to remember where he’d heard it before; indeed, he would never forget it as long as he lived. It was the same rasping he had heard when that refghast tried to kill him last night.

  Only now there were more. A lot more. From all over the room they appeared, some coming up through the floor, some through the walls, and some floated down from the ceiling. “Bethos be damned.”

  “You shouldn’t take the Lord’s name in vain,” Brandon said. Ev thought he detected humor in the other man’s voice.

  Suddenly the windows of the room exploded inwards, and Ev was showered with glass. He felt it biting into him, even through his clothes. He brushed it off as best he could, but he knew he couldn’t get all of it, not in the time he had.

  A figure appeared outside the window. He was just floating there, many stories above the ground—on fire! He gave them a sadistic grin.

  Brandon said, “Belial! I should have known it was you. What does Zero Grade want with Ev Bannen?”

  The fiery man called Belial said, “Ah, Brandon Strong—that is your name these days, isn’t it? Us gods in Zero Grade feel no need to hide our true selves.

  “What we want with Ev Bannen is none of your business. Let us kill him and we won’t have any trouble.”

  “And if I say no? Will you sic your pets on us?” The refghasts were all around them now, and Ev was terrified Brandon wouldn’t be able to save him this time.”

  “On you?” Belial said. “No, my ‘pets’—as you call them—are only for the human. I’ll deal with you myself.”

  Strangely, Brandon only responded with, “Ev, get out of the way of the door. Though scared to death, Ev managed to move over a few feet, coming closer to the nearby refghasts. Brandon then crouched, stretched his legs, and without further warning, rocketed through the window at Belial.

  Chapter II

  Brandon crashed with Belial in midair, and the two proceeded to fly across the Sepaphim City skyline, exchanging punches, kicks, and any physical attacks they felt like giving each other.

  Punch. Belial said, “I didn’t expect you to abandon the human like that.”

  Punch. Brandon replied, “I didn’t abandon anyone. I simply deferred the task to another.”

  Kick. “You mean…?”

  Punch. “That’s right. I didn’t come to Seraphim City alone. Freya is here.”

  Elbow. “Tsk! I should have known,” Belial said, spitting out blood.

  * * *

  The refghasts reached out to Ev. This was truly the end, he thought. Brandon had left him to fight that other guy, and now he was alone with these monsters. He screwed his eyes as tight as he could make them; he didn’t want to see it coming.

  Without warning, however, the hotel door exploded inward. It flew across the room, creaming two refghasts in the process.

  “Sorry I’m late,” said a beautiful woman with long blonde hair and a magnificent golden necklace, as she entered the room. She wore a dark coat and matching pants.

  Ev stood there, gawking at her. “W-Who are you?”

  She entered the room. The refghasts turned their attention to her. “Sorry about that,” she said sheepishly. “My name’s Freya. Along with Brandon, I’m one of the Lost Gods. More specifically, I represent the Divine Protector faction of the Lost Gods.” Morovia worshipped the god Bethos, but most of the world followed the Lost Gods, deities believed to be holdovers from the previous universe. No one knew their names since they came from another world entirely, but believers had faith the Lost Gods continued to guide them in modern times.

  “Please tell me you’re here to save me from these things,” he said, generating faith of his own.

  She smiled. “That I am.” Freya then put fingers to her mouth and whistled. Her chest suddenly began to glow, and before Ev’s astonished eyes two figures emerged from her midsection. They were shimmering golden tigers. “Protect Ev Bannen,” she commanded them.

  The tigers nodded their assent and leapt at the two refghasts nearest Ev. They proceeded to tear them to fleshy pieces.

  The other monsters shambled towards Freya, moaning, “Not fair. Interference.”

  The goddess held out her hand and said, “Come to me, Hildesvini.” A golden spear materialized in her grip. She held it above her head. “Foul creatures. I shall cleanse you from this world.” She had evidently decided now was the time to get serious.

  The refghasts lunged at her. However, she swung her spear in a wide arc, incinerating each of them instantaneously.

  All the while, Ev stared dumbfounded at the spectacle. So this was the power of a god, he thought to himself. And if Brandon could be believed, the power could be his.

  It was an intoxicating thought, but one he didn’t have time to indulge. The remaining refghasts came at him in a last-ditch effort to accomplish their mission. Fortunately, Freya rushed in and cut them down in the most graceful manner he ever saw. It all seemed effortless to him.

  When it was over, she asked him, “Are you all right?”

  He nodded. “Yeah, thanks to you. You saved me.”

  The sheepish smile returned. “That’s what I’m here for. Now, we just have to wait for Brandon to return.”

  Ev said, “Are you sure you shouldn’t go help him? That other guy looked pretty tough.”

  Freya shook her head. “Brandon can handle himself. Besides, my job here is to protect you. Unless, of course, you’d like to be left alone.”

  He frantically dismissed the idea. “No, no, no, no. Some more of those things might show up.”

  “Then we are in agreement, then! I’ll stay here with you until Brandon returns.”

  As it turned out, Brandon returned rather quickly. Ev said to him, “What happened to that fire guy?”

  Brandon shrugged. “He ran off after he found out I brought Freya along. He knew the odds were stacked against him.”

  “We’ve got to get Ev to the Academy before Belial has time to plan another attack,” Freya said.

  “The Academy?” Ev said, dumbstruck. “I just want to go home.”

  But Brandon said, “Bad idea. You’ll just be putting your family in danger. The safest place for you is the Divine Protector Academy.”

  “He’s right, Ev. At the Academy, we can train you to defend yourself against Zero Grade,” Freya added.

  Ev opened his mouth to argue, but no words came out. They were right; the only way to protect himself and his family was to accompany these two gods to their mysterious school and take them up on their offer. “Fine. Let’s go before the hotel staff shows up to investigate this mess.”

  “Oh, you don’t have to worry about that,” Freya said. “I used my power
s of illusion to hide all the commotion from them. As far as they know, nothing has happened here tonight.”

  Another convenient power. Ev wondered what kind of powers he would have as a god. However, a far more important question occurred to him. Am I even cut out to be a god?

  * * *

  Brandon and Freya used their powers to halt all the traffic in front of the hotel and freeze the people already out there. Once that was done, Freya conjured a sleigh out of thin air and gestured for Ev to get in back of it. He did so, though he felt silly. The two gods got in front after attaching a harness to Freya’s tigers. They evidently were meant to pull the thing.

  “Ready, Ev?” Brandon asked.

  “As ready as I’m going to be, I guess.”

  Freya took the reins. “Let’s go!” The cats begin running, and the sleigh followed suit. Down 6th Street they went, and they must have been quite the sight—if anyone could see them. After a minute the tigers took to the air. Ev felt a rush of excitement as the sleigh rose off the ground. The Seraphim City skyline spread out before them, a glittering collection of lights and skyscrapers. Ev couldn’t help but marvel as they got a grand view of the magnificent city.

  Before long they passed over Jaxon Harbor and the Treadwell Bridge on their way out of the city. No one on the ground seemed to notice the sleigh flying above their heads. That was probably due to the gods’ magic—or powers or whatever.

  Soon they were over the Nibian Sea, heading east. The sleigh must have picked up speed, because before Ev knew it they passed over the Murnau Islands.

  Despite the fact that they were exposed to the elements, Ev didn’t feel cold, and the wind wasn’t whipping loudly through the sleigh.

  Brandon turned around to face him. “You know anything about the Murnau Islands?”

  Ev shrugged. “I heard they don’t think very highly of women.”

  “That’s an understatement,” Freya said, keeping her eyes ahead.

  Ev was curious about that statement. “What do you mean?”

  “They have absolutely no respect for women. They don’t even consider them to be human,” Brandon explained. “You’ll find out all the ugly details soon enough. For now, it’s best not to think about it. Ignorance is bliss, in this case.”

  “Uh…OK.” Now he was really curious, in that “I want to know, but I don’t want to know” sort of way.

  * * *

  After flying for a while (Ev’s cell phone said it had only been an hour, though it felt like longer), they arrived at their destination: Mt. Oleia. True to Brandon’s map, the mountain rose out of the sea like an angry rock giant. It was mostly composed of one massive crag, with two smaller crags flanking it.

  Freya maneuvered the sleigh around to bring them closer to a tiny, almost imperceptible opening on the main crag’s face. They flew into it and landed in what appeared to be some sort of hangar. Inside were other sleighs of varying sizes and colors. Some looked like they could hold at least twenty people.

  They got out of the sleigh, and a young man in a jumpsuit came over to them. “Welcome back, Miss Freya, Mr. Strong. How did it go? The old girl didn’t give you any trouble, did she?”

  “None at all, Josh,” Freya said. “She handles as good as she ever did. My kids really have the hang of it by this point.” She indicated the tigers. She then whistled, and they retreated back into her chest. Ev wondered whether they were, in fact, her children or just her pets. He didn’t know anything about the Lost Gods, but then again, no one did.

  Brandon said, “Come on; the President is waiting for us.”

  Ev cocked an inquisitive eyebrow. “The President?”

  Freya explained, “The school’s president. He’s also the Dean and overall mentor to everyone. He’s the one who sent us to get you.”

  “Oh. That makes sense. So he’s like the head god or something?”

  Brandon replied, “Basically. Although he was actually born in the current, universe, he’s the one who founded this school. He recognized the need to create more gods to maintain order and keep Zero Grade in check.”

  They began walking across the hangar. Freya said, “The President is actually fairly young for a god, but he’s shown an amazing ability to grow as a deity.”

  “He’s a natural born leader. That’s why we Lost Gods follow him,” Brandon said.

  They reached the end of the hangar and got into an elevator. It took them down one floor, where they emerged into a circular reception area. A middle-aged brunette woman sat at a desk in the center of the room. Vending machines and a coffee dispenser were located to her left. Behind her was another elevator. A map of the school hung on the wall to her right.

  “Welcome back, you two,” the receptionist said to Brandon and Freya.

  “Good to see you again, Aphrodite,” Brandon replied. “Tell the President we brought Ev Bannen. I’m sure he’ll want to see him as soon as possible.”

  Aphrodite clicked her tongue. “Unfortunately, he’s in a meeting at the moment. I’ll let him know you’ve returned. Nice to meet you, Ev.”

  “Uh…thanks,” Ev said, not really sure what to do here.

  “We’ll head on down now,” Freya said.

  “I’ll let you know when the President gets out of his meeting,” Aphrodite assured them.

  They proceeded past the reception desk to the other elevator. This one had more buttons than the other:

  Level 2 – Offices

  Level 3-4 – Classrooms

  Level 5-6 – Dorms

  Level 7 – Recreation

  Level 8-9 – Training

  They got off at level five, which Brandon and Freya explained was the men’s dormitory. The elevator was situated in the middle of a long corridor. The hallway was brown with a white floor, and various fliers hung on bulletin boards. It looked just like any other college dorm, except this one was inside a mountain in the middle of the ocean.

  They sat him down at a chair in the hallway and told him to wait there until they returned. Minutes passed.

  Soon the elevators began letting off students. They were dressed in seemingly every fashion on the planet. It then occurred to Ev that the Divine Protector Academy probably recruited from all over Narska.

  He didn’t know any of these guys, so he decided to keep his head down. However, one student, a bronzed-skin youth with short, spiked brown hair, approached him. “G’day, mate. Don’t think I’ve seen you here before.” He offered Ev his hand.

  Ev stood up and nervously shook hands with him. This guy had at least a foot on Ev in height. He wore a brown vest and tie. “Uh…hi.”

  “The name’s Jaysin. Jaysin Marx. Niceta meet you.”

  “Ev. Ev Bannen.”

  Jaysin said, “You new here?”

  Ev nodded. “Yeah. Just got here five minutes ago. Had some trouble with rofghosts.”

  “You mean refghasts?”

  “Yeah.” Ev felt embarrassed to have gotten wrong the name of the things that had almost killed him.

  “Ugly little biters, aren’t they?”

  “Well…they didn’t actually bite me.”

  Jaysin laughed. “Just a figure of speech. They can’t bite you. They’ve got no mouths for it.”

  “I noticed. So how do they talk?”

  He explained, “The hypnotic signals they use to lure you in also let them communicate. Don’t really understand how it works, myself, but there you go.”

  Ev decided to change the subject. “So, where are you from, Jaysin?”

  “Chrichton.”

  “Chrichton? I’ve never met anyone from there before.”

  Jaysin replied, “Not surprising. Most Chrichtons never leave the country. It’s too much trouble getting over the mountain chains.

  “Where are you from?”

  Ev said, “Upton. It’s a small town on Morovia, about a thousand miles south of Seraphim City.”

  “Seraphim City! I’ve been there. Real twigging parties they throw there.”

  “‘Twigg
ing’?”

  “Another bit of Chrichton slang. When you’re mostly cut off from the rest of the world, you develop your own unique vocabulary.

  “So tell me: What kind of god are you going to become?”

  Ev was taken aback by the question. “What kind…?”

  “Yeah. Just like in religion and mythology, there’s different gods for different things. For example, Miss Freya is the goddess of love. Another person might be the god of thunder. Me, I’m gonna become the god of money.” To illustrate this point, he pulled out a fat wad of bills from his pocket.

  Ev gaped at it. “Holy…!”

  “Best to mind that kind of language around here. Never know who you’ll parse off talking like that.”

  Ev wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he just said, “Thanks.”

  “Don’t mention it. But going back to what I was saying—sooner or later everyone here has to figure out what kind of god they want to become. It’s your major, in other words.”

  “All right, I’ll definitely be thinking about it.”

  “Good.” Jaysin checked his expensive-looking watch. “I gotta get going. Maybe I’ll see you later.”

  “Yeah, maybe. Thanks for the advice.”

  “Don’t mention it.” And with that, he left. The hallway soon cleared, leaving Ev more or less alone again.

  Fortunately, within a few minutes Brandon and Freya returned. “Sorry to keep you waiting. Have you met any of the other students yet,” Brandon asked.

  “Yeah, I met one guy. He said he was going to become the god of money.”

  “Must be Jaysin Marx,” Freya said. “He might sound greedy, but he’s not. That’s because…well, better to let him tell you.”

  Ev said, “Um…OK.”

  “Come. The President is waiting for you,” Brandon said.

  Chapter III

  They returned to Level 2. Brandon and Freya led Ev past rows of offices to the one at the end of the hallway. The nameplate read “President Bethos”.