Camp Alien

by Gini Koch

  She headed for our table and Evalyne and Phoebe both got up and intercepted her. “I need to speak with the First Lady,” Crystal said rather imperiously.

  “No, you don’t,” Evalyne said nicely, but with steel in her tone.

  Looked at Mrs. Maurer. She was shooting daggers at her daughter-in-law. Couldn’t blame her. But we needed to hear what Crystal had to say.

  “Let her come,” I said.

  Crystal smirked at Evalyne and Phoebe. Decided her death would be slow and painful. “Thank you,” she said as she stepped up to the table and shoved in between White and Kyle. “I need to speak with you on matters of state.”

  “I’ll bet. Where are your children?”

  She blinked at me. “What?”

  “Your children. You have some as I recall. Where are they?”

  “Not here. Why? My children aren’t why I came to see you.”

  “Not here in Illinois or not here in D.C.?” Wished I’d brought an empath with us but we hadn’t had room in the car for Jeremy. Then again, among Abigail’s talents were that she was a reverse empath—if someone around her was angry, she got angry, and so forth. So congratulated myself on my prescience.

  “What does it matter?”

  “See, it matters to me, and you came to talk to me. Ergo, ipso facto, and that’s the fact, Jack, you’re going to tell me where your kids are, or this conversation is over.”

  Noted out of the corner of my eye that Lizzie had a pad and pen out, presumably taken from her messenger bag. She appeared to be doodling.

  “Where are your children?” she countered. Had to hand it to her—she’d clearly heard my Dad’s advice about answering a question you wanted to avoid with another question.

  “My children aren’t what we’re talking about.”

  She smirked. It was fast, but I caught it. Confirmation, as if I’d needed it, that she was in on one or more of the Bad Guy Plans du Jour. “My children aren’t what I came here to talk about, either.”

  Yawned. It was a fake yawn, and I made sure it was exaggerated. “Um, yeah. Losing interest fast.”

  “Why are you so interested in my children?” Crystal glanced at Mrs. Maurer. “Oh. Someone’s been whining about how she doesn’t see them much? She’s full of it. She could see them all she wanted if she and my husband came home and stopped hiding here.”

  Mrs. Maurer actually hadn’t mentioned her grandchildren to me recently. She’d had to choose between keeping her now-android son safe or risk rescuing them, and she hadn’t been sure that Crystal was in on anything, just that Crystal hadn’t cared at all when Maurer had become a different person, literally and figuratively.

  “What would they be hiding from?” Colette asked. Her voice was sweet and she sounded fascinated. And I could tell she was using troubadour influence.

  “They think that people are out to get them,” Crystal said dismissively.

  “Oh dear. Maybe that’s why the First Lady is so worried about your children’s whereabouts,” Colette said, oozing innocent concern that just begged for a reply.

  “My children are fine. They’re at the Mayflower, as a matter of fact.”

  Managed not to make a Mayflower Madam joke, but it took a lot of self-control. Just didn’t think it would go over well with this particular crowd. Noted Lizzie was now fiddling with her cell phone.

  “When were you going to tell us you were in town?” Mrs. Maurer asked quietly. Well, as quietly as someone who had a squeaky, high-pitched voice could manage. That voice was also trembling.

  “When it was convenient,” Crystal snapped.

  Made eye contact with Colette. She nodded almost imperceptibly. “Goodness, are the children old enough to be left alone all by themselves?”

  Crystal heaved a sigh. “They’re ten and eight, so yes, they are.”

  Didn’t consider a ten-year-old old enough to be left alone in a strange hotel room, but then again, Crystal hadn’t confirmed that they were alone. “You didn’t get a hotel babysitter?” I asked.

  “No. They’re fine alone. They’re used to it now, since I had to go to work because my husband quit his job, his life, and his family to come be a mama’s boy.”

  “And yet you haven’t divorced him.” Or mentioned that he was actually an android now. “Standing by your man, I see. Sort of. From several states away. But whatever, it’s good to know about your kids, I feel better about all of that now. And since you’ve answered my question, what is it you wanted to see me about?”

  “Finally. I have an offer for you.”

  “Gosh, how exciting. What is it?”

  “I have information you want. You have information I want. I figure we can do a trade.”

  “What information could I possibly have that you’d want?”

  She stared at me for a moment. “Why are you more interested in that than the information I have?”

  “Why does the order of this matter to you?”

  Her eyes narrowed. “You’re tricky.”

  “I am, you’re right.”

  Maybe it was because I’d dealt with androids before. Maybe it was because I’d recently considered that androids passed as humans so well because they were normally so unpleasant. Maybe it was because she was focused on the order of something innocuous. But it was probably because her husband had revealed himself to be an android—complete with showing exposed circuitry—on national and international news a few days ago, and Crystal hadn’t mentioned it even in passing.

  I was now certain Crystal Maurer had joined her husband in the Land of Circuits and was an android.

  Wished I’d dragged Chuckie along with us, because I had no idea how to slam a pen or pencil into an android ear in the correct way to keep them from self-destructing. And I knew without asking that if I gave away that I knew Crystal was an android that her self-destruct mechanism would go off. And, A-Cs with us or not, I didn’t like our odds of survival. Besides, coming here was supposed to make Rosemary and Douglas even more successful, not destroy their business.

  Decided that giving her what she wanted might be wise. “What information do you have for me that I’d want?”

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

  “Um, yes, that’s why I asked.” Either she was an android without the best programming or she was an idiot.

  Poor programming meant that it wasn’t Cliff or LaRue who’d done it. Or whoever they had on staff wherever they still happened to have staff. So, that might mean that Crystal had been made without Cliff’s knowledge. And I knew just the person who had the access to not only Cliff but to Crystal, seeing as she’d been Gideon Cleary’s assistant when Maurer was his running mate—Stephanie.

  “Oh. Yes. Right. Sorry.” Crystal seemed to be blipping. She blinked several times in rapid succession, shook herself, then looked back at me. “Sorry. I want a guarantee that you’ll give me what I want before I give you what you want.”

  “Sorry, I don’t make stupid deals. Tell me what you have and tell me what you want, and we’ll go from there.”

  “Fine. I know who broke into the White House. And I want to be at the peace talks.”

  “Ah. How interesting.” Sipped my tea, which had gone cold. Poured more hot tea into my cup, added sugar and milk, stirred it, sipped again. Then I looked up. “You’re still here?”

  “Yes. I want to confirm our deal.”

  “I don’t care about your information and I’m not inviting you to the peace summit.”

  She stared at me. “What? Why not?”

  “I already know who broke in.” Because I frankly figured it was Crystal herself. Had a guess for how she’d been invisible, too. Shrugged. “Give me information I’m really interested in. If you give me what I want, what I really, really want, then I might let you come to the peace summit.”

  “What is it that you really, really wan
t?”

  “If you don’t know, then we have nothing to discuss. Call me when you’ve figured it out.”

  “I don’t have your number.”

  Couldn’t help it, I snorted. “Sure you don’t. Get it from whoever you’re working with, for, or around. I’m sure they’ve got me on speed dial.”

  “Fine.” She glared at me, then looked at Mrs. Maurer. “Give my husband my regards.” With that she spun on her heel and walked out.

  “Someone pay our bill as fast as possible.” Ensured my voice was low but urgent. White got up and went to find Rosemary. I stood up. “We need to follow her.”

  Len waved his phone. “Sit back down, Kitty. I contacted Mister Buchanan while you were verbally sparring with her. He sent Mister Falk, who’s just told me that he has her and is tailing. He has a team of P.T.C.U. agents with him.”

  “Great.” Sat back down as requested, though what I wanted to do was run after Crystal and follow her to whatever lair or base of operations she was using. “Tell them not to approach her, because she’ll self-destruct.”

  “She’s an android?” Vance asked, sounding horrified. But not as horrified as Abner looked. Colette, on the other hand, got up, nodded to me, and went and got Manfred. They disappeared. Hoped they’d find Falk and his team, and Crystal, quickly.

  “Yes,” Abigail said. “Chuck’s been having me work with John and Cameron to see if I can pick up emotional nuances between full humans or A-Cs and androids. It’s hard, but I’ve been working at it since we all got back from Beta Eight, and I’m sure that she’s an android.”

  Mrs. Maurer was pale. “I need to get to my grandchildren.”

  “Don’t worry, it’s totes handled,” Lizzie said. We all looked at her. She shrugged. “I sketched her picture and sent it to my dad, along with the hotel name and that the kids are ten and eight.” She held up her notebook that she’d been doodling on—there was quite a good likeness of Crystal drawn there. “He’s with Mister Buchanan, who got in touch with Jeff, who said that he was against child endangerment. So the Secret Service went over and got them. They’re at the White House, ’cause the Secret Service rolled with some A-Cs.”

  “Awesome. We need to get Nancy back there immediately.”

  “What are we going to do when Crystal calls the police?” Mrs. Maurer asked, voice squeakier than usual.

  “She won’t.” Stood up again and indicated that everyone else needed to stand, too.

  “You can’t be sure of that,” White said as he rejoined us.

  “I can be, actually.” Headed for the door. “She’s not nearly as good as the androids that Antony Marling made, meaning she’s not from that factory, so to speak. I was sure she was an android before Abby confirmed it. I think someone with a lot of skills and a hell of a lot of connections made her. No idea if Crystal was willing or not, but it doesn’t matter. Her programming is better than the Fem-Bots I’ve seen, but not nearly as good as the other androids I’ve dealt with.”

  Zipped through the door before Evalyne or Phoebe, which earned me a couple of really loud sighs from the two of them. “The cars aren’t here yet,” Evalyne said, as she got in front of me. “Meaning you should still be inside.” Phoebe was talking into her lapel, demanding our cars step on the gas.

  “I’m a rule breaker, me.”

  “Tell me something I don’t know. We’re not going to allow you to go after her, so don’t plan on trying.”

  “I wasn’t.” Looked around. Didn’t see Falk, Colette, or Manfred, let alone Crystal. “You know, this makes at least the third time our enemies have essentially ambushed us at the Teetotaler. If I didn’t love the place so much I’d say we should never come back here.”

  Had a tingling in between my shoulder blades, like you can get sometimes when someone’s watching you. Spun around. No sign of Buchanan. Then again, I’d never really felt him watching me unless he’d wanted me to know he was there. Didn’t see Mister Joel Oliver or Bruce Jenkins or any of their compatriots.

  Looked up and around. Still didn’t see anyone. “Think there are drones around here?”

  “There shouldn’t be,” Evalyne said. “Why?”

  “I think we’re being watched.”

  One of our limos arrived. “What the hell kept you?” Phoebe asked as she opened the door.

  “No parking across the street, no parking anywhere nearby,” the driver replied. Checked. He was definitely one of the Secret Service guys who’d driven us here.

  “Get Nancy back. And Abner and Vance, too.” Looked at Lizzie, who gave me what I assumed she felt was a steely gaze. Decided that I’d let her win this one. “Richard, Lizzie, Abby, Mahin, the boys, and I will take the next car.”

  “That leaves agents stranded,” Phoebe said.

  “Call for another car. I want these three people guarded. So send the other dudes along with this car. Colette and Manfred will either rejoin us, stay with Falk and his team, or simply use their A-C ability to get home faster than anyone else and be waiting for us. We’ll divide up into the next two cars.”

  Another limo rounded the corner, so Evalyne and Phoebe stopped arguing. Instead, Evalyne sent the two Secret Service agents who’d been guarding the door into this car.

  “Stay at the White House, all three of you,” I said to my staff. “See you soon.”

  Evalyne closed the door and they drove off. The next limo pulled up.

  And, because I knew how my life worked, the driver was definitely not one of my Secret Service detail. But it was someone I knew, in that sense.

  Thomas Kendrick was behind the wheel.

  CHAPTER 49

  IT LOOKED LIKE KENDRICK, at any rate. But he was either in the White House complex or somewhere else with the rest of Team Technical. Then again, I was 99.99 percent certain that there was an android of Kendrick running around. And that the android could drive was not a shocker.

  “That’s our vehicle,” Evalyne said, voice strained. “How did he get into it?”

  “I don’t think that’s the real Thomas Kendrick. Mister White?”

  “Agreed, Missus Martini.”

  “Abby?”

  “Need more time, Kitty. Stall if we can risk it.”

  The passenger’s window rolled down. “Get in, please,” the driver who did sound like Kendrick said. But there was no real recognition in his expression, not that this was a surprise. He also wasn’t wearing what Kendrick had been. Sure, he was in a suit, but his was gray, and the real Kendrick had been in navy.

  Looked into the car, despite Evalyne trying to keep me from doing so. There was no one else inside. “Where’s the driver? The original driver?”

  The Kendrick Android stared at me. “I’m the original driver.”

  “No, you’re not. I want to know what happened to him. Or we’re not getting into the car.”

  “I’ve been driving this car all day.”

  “You tell me where the original driver of this car is, or I’m not doing anything you want.”

  The Kendrick Android stared at me for a bit. “Around the corner, four blocks down, in a dumpster.”

  Phoebe was talking into her lapel, advising others that we had a man down. Meanwhile, I was already angry, which was good. Rage, not fear, was my friend.

  Our options were likely limited, though with A-Cs around we could run and be safe. Or I could find out what the Kendrick Android wanted. And with Stephanie incarcerated, had to figure the only person—to use the term loosely—who had any idea where our missing helicarrier and people were was this android. Crystal might know, but the Kendrick Android knew for certain.

  “Thank you for the information. Who do you want in the car?” I asked.

  “You’re not getting in that car,” Evalyne said strongly.

  “She is or you’ll all get shot,” the Kendrick Android said. “We have snipers on the rooftops.�
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  “Told you I felt like we were being watched. Give us a minute,” I said to the android. “Need to confer on who’s getting in with me.”

  “The kid and the old man,” the Kendrick Android said without missing a beat. “The two women who aren’t Secret Service can get in, too. The others will be shot if they try to get into the car with you or try to get you away from the car.”

  “He’s bluffing,” Phoebe said.

  No sooner were these words out of her mouth than a bullet hit the ground just in front of her feet. Grabbed Evalyne and Phoebe both as they both started to move to cover me. “Don’t react and don’t try to shield me. That was an intentional miss.” Looked up and around. Didn’t see anyone.

  “Our job is to shield you!” Evalyne sounded as upset as I figured everyone felt.

  “Yeah, it is, only I never asked for someone to take a bullet for me, and you and the boys aren’t on a short list for that option as far as I’m concerned.” Besides, the android wanted to have me bring along two powerful A-C hybrids, my normal kick-butt partner, and a kid who’d been trained by three top assassins. Clearly I was going to be rolling with a strike force.

  Decided I didn’t want to risk it and sent a strong mental message to any of my stealth strike force that might be around that I could use some backup. Felt something nudge my leg, but didn’t look down.

  “Get in or we start shooting,” the android said.

  “Connect with Falk,” I said quietly to Evalyne. “He’ll know what to do to coordinate.” Nodded to White, who opened the passenger door and ushered Abigail, Mahin, and Lizzie inside, then got in himself.

  I opened the front passenger’s door. “What are you doing?” the Kendrick Android asked, sounding shocked.

  “Riding shotgun. I like it, rarely get to do it anymore, and want to ensure that you don’t try the old Gas Them Unconscious Ploy. In fact, roll down the privacy window, or I don’t get in and my people already in get out.”

  The android tried staring me down. It’s difficult to stare down a machine, but I’d learned stare-down techniques from Mom, and so far she and Chuckie were the only ones who could beat me.