Camp Alien

by Gini Koch

  “Yeah, I saw you from an upstairs window. Where we were having to beat and shoot our androids into submission, seeing as we didn’t have the snazzy rocket launcher.”

  “Our rescuer only had the one,” White said.

  “Yeah, well, I’m sure she didn’t have time to grab a lot of things. Adriana, let me say with all sincerity that it’s really great to see you.”

  She flipped the visor of what was absolutely a motorcycle helmet up. “Grandmother says that she’d like you all to come by and have some refreshments when we’re done here. And yes, all the hostiles are down.”

  Adriana was the granddaughter of the Romanian Ambassador, which, since their embassy was across the street from ours, was why we’d met. However, though her grandmother, Olga, was currently mostly confined to a wheelchair due to MS, she was former KGB and had been training Adriana in the Old Ways. Adriana had saved my life more than once, and was considered a vital part of the team.

  Olga was also the Oracle. From the vantage point of her second-floor office that had two windows that looked out onto two rather mundane streets, she knew everything that was going on. Figured the invitation to drop by was a hint that indicated that Olga felt we were all being too slow to catch on to what was really going on. Was sure she was right, so looked forward to the upcoming mental gymnastics, since Olga liked to make you work for it.

  Therefore, Adriana being our rescuer wasn’t a surprise. What did surprise me, though, was that everyone else looked surprised by this reveal, White and Abigail included.

  “Really, gang? Okay, I admit that I was watching for pursuit and saw a motorcycle several times on our trip here. But she’s too small to be Malcolm, Siler, Len, or Kyle, and our A-C Field agents can’t ride a bike. At least, not yet. And let’s face it—Adriana’s amazingly well trained. Why are you keeping the helmet on, though?”

  Adriana shrugged. “I figured it was more important to figure out what was going on and do what I could to rescue you. Besides, extra protection doesn’t hurt.”

  “Truer words and all that. By the way, I think Lizzie and I know where the helicarrier is.”

  “Across from these containers, yes.”

  “Show-off.”

  Adriana giggled. “I like to keep you impressed.”

  White cleared his throat. “Sadly these aren’t containers, though they do look like it. Abigail and I thought we might find either hostages or weapons in these. We’ve been inside. These were classrooms. Of a sort.”

  “I thought they looked like those portable classrooms we had when I was in grade school. Never my favorite place to be.”

  “Trust me when I say that these are worse than anything you’ve experienced, Missus Martini, and leave it at that.”

  “Gotcha.”

  “Why are you holding that headboard?” Abigail asked. “I mean, I think it’s a headboard.”

  “It is, and, as Adriana said, extra protection never hurts.”

  “How is that protection?” White asked.

  “I’m holding it as a shield.” Decided I could put it down for the moment. “The footboard that Lizzie has was amazingly effective when we had to smash androids that we thought we’d already taken offline.” Lizzie kept a hold on the footboard, though Mahin put the metal bars down.

  Adriana nodded. “Len said you’d been taken by an android. That’s why I brought vechi de incredere, here.” She patted the bazooka.

  “What does that mean in Romanian?”

  “It would translate to Old Trusty for you.”

  That was what I called my purse and what Olga apparently called her personal bazooka. Didn’t know whether this made me more normal than Olga or less prepared and realistic. Probably both.

  “Aha. Nice to see that Olga kept some mementos from her KGB days to pass down to you. So, did Len call you or something? Or is Olga even more prescient than even I think and you called him?”

  She laughed. “No. He’d texted me, to ask me to drop by, when Crystal Maurer arrived. I was on my way to meet up with all of you when he called me, right after he and the others went back into the Teetotaler, after you’d been taken. He felt that I was the only one likely to react with the kind of speed he wanted, especially since I was already on the way.”

  Considered this. Why would Len think everyone was acting slowly? He’d texted with Buchanan earlier. And Buchanan had sent Falk immediately. Nothing wrong with those actions. Other than the fact that Buchanan hadn’t been the one to come. But I’d assigned him and the others to a job, and maybe Jeff had sent him to do something, too.

  None of that said too slowly, though. So, maybe Len had called someone else before he’d called Adriana, and whoever that was had told him that a political response was going to be necessary.

  “Ah. They’re trying to minimize fallout and not get the press involved.”

  “So Grandmother believes. Though she wasn’t entirely convinced and feels that more could be going on.”

  “I’ll take the obscure hint under advisement. Did you get your ammo from us?”

  “No. It’s all ours. But Grandmother said to tell you that it was on the house.”

  “I love Olga. So, you guys just happen to have personal rocket launchers lying around the Romanian embassy?”

  “Yes. Don’t you?”

  “Honestly? Yes.” Maybe every embassy in town was armed to the teeth. The Israelis and Bahrainis certainly were. Or maybe it was just the embassies we hung with. “And you were bringing it with you to come have tea with us?”

  “Yes. Len said there was something wrong with Crystal and that I should assume she was an android. Therefore, I came, as you Americans like to say, armed for bear.”

  “Trust me, I am not complaining. So, is anyone else planning to come rescue us? Just asking and all that.”

  Adriana shook her head as she took her helmet off. “I don’t know. I was focused on finding you and then tailing you so that I wouldn’t be noticed. I have no cellular service here, though, so I assume we’re being scrambled or dampened in this area.”

  “Yeah, that’s my guess, too. I was able to keep my phone on while we were driving, but I have nothing here, either. So, we work under the assumption that if a bigger cavalry is on the way, it’s going to take them time to find us.”

  “Possibly much time. It was hard for me to tell, by the way, but I believe that I lost coverage sooner than when I arrived here. I believe I lost it once I was near to your car.”

  “Fantastic. Maybe once we’re farther from the car we’ll get service again, but I never count on things working out that well. Okay, so, are we sure all the androids are destroyed?”

  “There were twelve that had Mister White and Abigail surrounded,” Adriana said. “And I’ve destroyed all of them.” She nodded toward the android carnage in the clearing. Recounted. Yep, there were twelve android heads, or what was left of them.

  “Go team. We took care of our thirteen. So that means that, with the first ones we hopefully put out of commission, we got them all. But what about the Kendroid?”

  White shook his head. “We haven’t seen him, and believe me, we looked.”

  “Though we didn’t get far,” Abigail added. “We checked all these containers first, since Uncle Richard felt they’d be prime holding cells.”

  “I’d agree. But no?”

  “Not for a long time.” White looked ill and Abigail shuddered.

  “Put it this way,” she said. “Uncle Richard was right, but they were used decades ago. Our prisoners aren’t in them. Thank God.”

  “Yeah, I think I’ll pass on taking a look-see.”

  “Should we go back to the car and get our phones?” Lizzie asked.

  Checked my phone. “Nope, still have no coverage here, and per Adriana, we probably want to get farther from the car, not closer.” Was about to suggest we try to determine w
here the cellular blockage or scrambling or whatever was coming from, in case it wasn’t coming from the limo, when my music changed to “All the Pretty Ones” by the Exies. Clearly this was a hint. Looked around. “Have you seen the Poofs or Peregrines?”

  Before anyone could answer, heard a whole lot of squawking and bird screaming coming from the other side of these containers.

  Didn’t hesitate, just ran for the sound of my Peregrines in trouble.

  CHAPTER 57

  RAN INTO THE AREA littered with android parts, but no Peregrines were in evidence, or Poofs for that matter.

  However, the screeching was still going on, but as I listened, it was clear that it wasn’t coming from one area, but from all over. And it was echoing, which made determining where the birds were more difficult. Stopped running and tried to focus.

  The others reached me quickly. “I hear them,” Mahin said. “But they don’t sound like they’re in any one area.”

  “That means we have to split up.” We all looked at each other. No one was excited by this idea.

  “Hyperspeed handles so many things,” White said as he took Lizzie’s hand. Abigail grabbed Mahin and Adriana.

  My music switched to Cher’s “Living in a House Divided.” Chose not to argue or question Algar’s musical choices right now. “Look, the Peregrines are either in trouble or they’ve found something. I’m with you on the idea that we should use hyperspeed. I just think that we should split up. And, since we’re already in teams, let’s go with that.”

  “You don’t have a partner.” White took my hand. “Two teams is fine. But no one goes off alone here,” he said firmly.

  “I agree,” Adriana said. “I’d prefer we all stay together, but I agree that the birds seem very upset. We’ll take everything to the west, you take the building ahead of us and everything to the east.”

  “Ah . . .”

  “We’re taking all the buildings near the basketball courts. You go the other way.”

  “Gotcha.”

  “How do we stay in touch?” Lizzie asked nervously.

  Adriana dug into her backpack and pulled out two walkie-talkies. “These should work. They’re already set to the right channel to communicate.” She handed one to Lizzie and kept the other for herself. Then she took out two flashlights and gave me one and Mahin the other, after which she put her helmet into the backpack.

  “Room in there now that you used all your ammo?”

  She smiled. “Of course. We like to be efficient.” She took Abigail’s hand again and they zipped off toward the left.

  Examined the building ahead of us. It was another brick building, though nowhere near as large as the main building we’d had so much “fun” in. Probably a quarter of the size, if that. Only one story, decrepit like every other building I’d seen since we’d arrived.

  “Remember that the invisible helicarrier is around here somewhere,” I said to White.

  “Yes, we spotted where we believe it is based on the flattened foliage. We considered trying to see if we could feel it, but since it’s truly invisible and we have no idea what we’d be touching, discretion became the better part of valor.”

  “So it’s not cloaked with what Centaurion normally uses?”

  “No, it’s not. Which, since it’s from Vatusus, isn’t that much of a surprise, though I’ll admit to disappointment.”

  “Can all A-Cs see through the Invisibility Shields?”

  White gave me a look that said he felt I might be overtired. “Not the ones used for the vehicles. Not normally, at any rate. Those shields are a more concentrated form of the cloaking we use. Why?”

  “I think I know how Crystal Maurer got into the White House at o-dark-thirty this morning.”

  “Does it matter for this situation?”

  “I have no idea.”

  “Good to know. At any rate, duty awaits. Shall we?”

  Lizzie and I both nodded, and we took off at the slow version of hyperspeed, I presumed to avoid slamming ourselves into the helicarrier, and headed for our first target. White circumnavigated us carefully and took us far wider than probably necessary to avoid the helicarrier, but who was I to complain?

  The doors were open, so we went in.

  To discover, as “Haunting the Chapel” by Slayer came on, that we’d indeed found the chapel. There was graffiti and lots of dust, but it wasn’t nearly as destroyed as the main building. We searched quickly but found nothing, though there were a couple pairs of shoes here and there. Still heard the Peregrines squawking, but they sounded farther away now.

  “I don’t think any kind of God was ever here,” Lizzie said quietly.

  “Too true,” White replied. As the former Supreme Pontifex, I had a feeling that he, even more than the rest of us, found this entire place upsetting on a deeply personal level. “May they all be in the embrace of a loving deity now.”

  We left, and now it was time to choose where we went next. There were buildings across the street, so we went to them. The one directly across from the chapel was two stories. The doors were ajar, though they did say that there was No Trespassing. We chose to ignore that and ran inside.

  It was dark in here, not that there weren’t windows and such, but if the main building had been murky and foreboding, this one took those elements up to eleven. Couldn’t hear any birds as well once we were inside, but we did a fast run through the place just to be sure. This building was easily two-thirds the size of the main one but it contained no Peregrines.

  Besides all the horrific elements we’d seen already, this one had even more hospital-type stuff, though it was loaded with shoes, too. Wondered if there was some horrible reason for it and had to figure there was. Maybe the ghosts kept the shoes around so they could escape or something esoteric and creepy like that.

  Bottom line, though, was that we’d either found the infirmary or this place had really been the Home for Aspiring Dr. Mengele Wannabes. Had a feeling that I should bet on both, especially when Van Halen’s “Somebody Get Me A Doctor” came on my airwaves.

  There were stairs going up and down. We went down first. The basement appeared to be more medical and what I was pretty sure was a morgue. It was in horrific shape, and parts were impassable. Didn’t know whether to be grateful or not that Adriana had given us a flashlight. Was hugely happy we were going through it at full hyperspeed.

  Nothing other than old horrors discovered, we headed upstairs. Most of this floor was just the usual decay, debris, garbage, and shoes, but there was a big room on one side that, when I entered, was really reminiscent of all the Labs of Horror I’d seen in the past few years.

  The walls looked thicker, as if they were reinforced, and there was weird medical machinery, what looked like a small assembly line, and what looked like a freestanding room or giant freezer or similar.

  “What do you think?” White asked.

  “I think we open that freezer and get prepared for what we’ll find.”

  White nodded, let go of me and Lizzie—who I shoved behind me—and pulled the door open.

  Nothing leaped out at us, and I took a careful look inside. There were a lot of what looked like standing coffins, only they were made of glass. They were all open and empty. Counted. There were twenty.

  “Looks familiar, doesn’t it, Missus Martini?”

  “Yeah, similar to the cloning lab we found under Gaultier, but it’s not quite the same. My guess is this is where the androids sleep or rest or are programmed or whatever when they’re made. But I don’t think this is where they hang once they get clothes.” My music changed to “Déjà Vu” by Iron Maiden. Decided Algar was enjoying himself again.

  White cocked his head. “There’s something else . . . familiar about this.”

  “What?”

  He shook his head. “I can’t remember what it is. The tickle of memory feels quite . . .
old.”

  “Well, it’ll come to you, I’m sure.”

  “Think we’ll find something like this but made for twelve?” Lizzie asked.

  “Not sure. Honestly, I think that once they get clothes they go elsewhere. But since there are no androids, hostages, or Peregrines, it’s time to check out another Cabin in the Woods and see what we luck into.”

  As we were ready to leave, Lizzie looked out the far window. “Is that civilization?” She pointed off to our left, where there was a flash of something that didn’t look brick.

  “I suggest we find out,” White said. We linked up and headed downstairs and out. It was still cruddy outside, but so much less horrible than inside.

  “Hey, it’s totes quiet again,” Lizzie pointed out. “What’s happened to the Peregrines?”

  “I’m going to hope that Adriana’s team found them and that they’re okay.”

  “We should still continue to search, however, regardless of the Peregrines’ potential situation,” White said. “Or shall we see if we can get help?”

  Social Distortion’s “Prison Bound” hit my airwaves. “I wonder if that’s a detention center or something.”

  “Meaning we can get help,” White suggested.

  Lizzie grimaced. “There’s no way we’re supposed to be here, not after what Mahin said about this place. You know what they’ll do if we ask for help.”

  “No, I don’t,” White said. “What will they do?”

  She shrugged. “Tell us we aren’t supposed to be here, lock us up, and wait for our parents to come get us. Totes metaphorically speaking, of course.”

  “Of course. Lizzie’s right, though, I think. Let’s see if we can find our hostages first. I don’t really know how we’re going to explain that we think there’s an invisible helicarrier sitting here without causing some kind of incident that’s only going to hurt Jeff’s presidency.”

  “While us trotting around in an abandoned mental asylum won’t cause any problems, I’m sure.” White’s sarcasm knob was going well past eleven.