Silent Night

by Danielle Steel

  Chapter 16

  The house that Whitney had rented at Lake Tahoe was even better than she remembered from when she drove up to see it, along with several others. It was a big beautiful old home that belonged to a family whose children had grown up and now had children of their own, according to the realtor. They still used it in August, but had decided to rent it in July for the first time. There were six bedrooms, a bunk room on the top floor, enough bathrooms for everyone, a huge living room and dining room downstairs on the main floor with fireplaces tall enough to stand in, wooden beams and paneling throughout the house, and a big slightly old-fashioned kitchen where you could prepare meals for an army. There was an outdoor barbecue. And down the slope at the edge of the lake, there was a boathouse with two speedboats in it, a sleek modern one and an old wooden Riva that had been impeccably cared for. There was a jet ski, and a long dock that jutted out into the water.

  The whole property was ringed with beautiful old trees, and there was a tennis court behind the house that had been built fairly recently for teenaged grandchildren. A small guest cottage with two bedrooms was next to it, away from the hubbub of the main house. It had everything they could have wanted, more bedrooms than they needed, and it was all impeccably maintained. Emma was thrilled when she saw it, and ran from room to room trying to decide which one to sleep in. The master bedroom had a big carved antique wooden bed, and an enormous bathroom. Emma chose the bedroom next to it, with twin beds covered in pink floral chintzes, a dressing table with a matching skirt, and more pink floral fabric at the windows. It looked very English.

  They’d stopped to buy groceries on the way, and after they put them away, Whitney made sandwiches for them, and after she put the dishes in the dishwasher, they walked down to the lake to explore the boathouse, and Emma jumped up and down when she saw the jet ski.

  “Can I use it?” she asked Whitney, who looked at it nervously, remembering Amy’s warning not to overprotect her.

  “Have you ever used one?”

  “I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I can’t remember.” Whitney smiled at her answer.

  “Maybe we should use it together. They can be powerful, and dangerous.” She knew there were frequent accidents on the lake in the summer, and she didn’t want to be careless. “And I want you to wear a life preserver whenever you’re down at the lake,” she added, “until you learn to swim again.” She noticed that there were half a dozen bicycles leaning against the wall, with helmets on pegs above them. They’d been told that there were tennis rackets in the garage, and the realtor had said that there were public stables nearby, if they liked to ride. Whitney hadn’t ridden since she and Paige were children, and she didn’t want to start again now at her age. It had been too long, and she’d never been a terrific rider.

  They sat on the dock after they’d looked around, and dangled their feet in the water. It was freezing cold. The water at Lake Tahoe was always freezing, and swimming was always invigorating. They went back up to the house after that, and put their bathing suits on, and then came back, and Whitney got a life jacket from the boathouse and made Emma put it on.

  “It’s too small, Aunt Whit,” Emma complained. “It’s squeezing me.”

  “Then go grab a bigger one. You’re not going in without one.”

  “I’m not two years old, you know,” she grumbled over her shoulder and came back a minute later with a slightly larger one over her bathing suit. They got into the water together, and they both screamed at first at how cold the water was, and Emma said her feet had tingles. They floated around together close to the dock, and were shivering when they got out. Whitney toweled her off as they both giggled about how cold it was. They lay in the sun for a while on dry towels, and at the end of the afternoon, they went back up to the house. Bailey called to see how they were and asked if they needed him to bring anything they’d forgotten. He was going to leave at five in the morning and hoped to be there by three in the afternoon. It was a long drive from L.A. Whitney had left even earlier. Emma had slept most of the way.

  They were cooking an early dinner of hamburgers when he called them, and Whitney sounded relaxed and happy.

  “The house is perfect,” she told him. “Bring your bathing suit, you don’t need your tennis racket, they have some here. We found bicycles in the boathouse. Wait till you see it!” She sounded as happy as Emma. They were planning to stay there for a month, and Bailey was coming up for four days over the long weekend. They had checked out the guest house on their way back from the lake. It looked like a little English cottage in a fairy tale.

  “Maybe I’ll try to leave a little earlier,” he said, “so we can swim when I get there.”

  “They have a jet ski too,” Whitney added. “Do you know how to drive one?”

  “Of course. I’m a pro. I can’t wait to see you both.” Whitney was excited to see him too. For all her nervousness about embarking on a relationship with him, they had gotten used to seeing each other almost every day, and she was excited about spending the four-day weekend with him. “I’ll get there as soon as I can,” he promised. “If they have a barbecue, I’ll make dinner tomorrow, and maybe we can go night fishing sometime. We might even be able to catch crayfish right from the dock.” Everything he suggested sounded like fun to Whitney. They talked about it over dinner after he hung up.

  “Can I go night fishing with him?” Emma asked.

  “Sure,” Whitney said, without giving it further thought. She knew Bailey wouldn’t do anything dangerous with her. She’d be in good hands with him, even on the jet ski. It was going to be nice having a man there to help them. Brett had come up with them too and had friends staying nearby.

  Whitney thought of Chad as she did the dishes after dinner. This was an entirely different experience from his luxurious yacht with the huge crew but it felt more like a real vacation, with lots of space to move around in. She was glad she had rented it. It reminded her too of vacations she had taken with their parents, with big comfortable houses they had rented in various locations when she and Paige were little and their mother was between films. They had even gone to Africa on safari once, under very luxurious circumstances, when they were in their teens. Their mother had hated it and been frightened of animals and snakes the whole time, but the girls and their father had loved it.

  Emma slept peacefully after their swim in the lake, and Whitney woke early the next morning, and put two vases of flowers from the garden in the cottage for Bailey, and then came back and made breakfast for Emma when she woke up. She made pancakes and bacon, and then they walked back to the lake, and lay in the sun on the dock again, with Emma in her life jacket.

  Bailey left L.A. two hours earlier than he said he would, and reached the house at one, just as Emma and Whitney were finishing lunch. Emma let out a squeal of delight when she saw him, and gave him a tour of the whole place, including the boathouse, the jet ski, and the dock. Then she showed him his cottage, which Whitney had left open for him. He admired the well-kept tennis court on their way to the house, where Whitney had been organizing what they were going to have for dinner.

  “The old Riva they have in the boathouse is a beauty,” he said admiringly, as he kissed her when Emma went upstairs to get something in her bedroom. “Thank you for having me up here. My grandparents had a house like this on a lake in Wisconsin. We used to go up there every summer, until my brother’s accident. I loved it.” The house Whitney had rented had a wonderful old-fashioned feeling to it, and everything was in mint condition. The family who owned it obviously loved it.

  “How about a swim in the lake?” he suggested when Emma reappeared.

  She looked glum for a moment. “Aunt Whit says I have to wear a life jacket till I learn how to swim again.”

  “That sounds sensible. Then let’s get started right away so I can get you up on water skis before the end of the month,” he said, and Emma clapp
ed her hands with glee. He was hoping to be invited back for at least one more weekend, or several.

  “Will you take me on the jet ski?” He looked to Whitney for his cue, and she nodded.

  The three of them went down to the dock. Emma put the life vest on, and Bailey dove smoothly into the water, swam underwater for a few minutes, and came up spluttering with the cold.

  “It’s even colder than I remembered from the last time I was here,” he said and climbed out to lie in the sunshine with them, and a few minutes later, he took Emma in swimming and kept a firm grip on her life jacket, and Whitney joined them, but they didn’t stay in long.

  “Can we do the jet ski now?” Emma wanted to do everything with him.

  “How about doing that tomorrow? Why don’t we drive the boat around before dinner?” He took the Riva out with great care a little while later, made sure that there was gas in it, and then drove along the shore to take a look. They all enjoyed it. And he wiped it down and covered it carefully when they brought it back. “That is an absolute gem,” he said to Whitney.

  As the sun was setting, they went up to the house and started dinner. Brett was at her friends’ that night. Bailey lit the barbecue, and Whitney had chicken and steaks ready for him to cook. Then he went to his cottage to change and put on jeans and a sweater as it started to get chilly. Whitney sent Emma to her room to get a sweater too.

  It felt like a family being together. Whitney was enjoying it thoroughly and so was Emma. She liked having a man around to do things with, and had had too little of it in her lifetime, since Paige’s romances were always brief, and never with men who were interested in children. Bailey was having fun with them, and was suggesting they go fishing the next day and check out the dock for crayfish that night, with a net, some bait, and a flashlight to attract them.

  “How do you know all these things?” Whitney asked him as he prepared a tray of the meat for dinner.

  “I’m a guy. Guys know about things like barbecues and fishing,” he teased her, leaned over to kiss her, and Emma saw it and giggled, but she didn’t disapprove. “And tomorrow the jet ski, I promise.” He wanted to get in everything that Emma wanted to do, and still manage to spend time with Whitney. But there would be plenty of time at night when Emma was asleep.

  The steaks and chicken he grilled for them that night were delicious, and Whitney made baked potatoes and corn on the cob to go with them. Then Bailey put together s’mores for dessert from some groceries he had brought himself, and they ate them outdoors near the open fireplace. Emma got the gooey marshmallows and melted chocolate all over her face. She looked like she was in heaven, and Whitney had one too.

  “Oohhh, these are so good,” Emma said, helping herself to a third one, and Bailey laughed watching her.

  “Did you ever go to camp, Em?” he asked her casually, and she laughed at him.

  “Are you kidding? I was on a TV show for two years. I had to learn lines every day, and during the hiatus, I had drama coach and voice lessons, and tap, hip-hop, and ballet.” She remembered it all now. “There was no way I could have gone to camp. My mom wouldn’t have let me.”

  “Maybe next year,” Bailey commented with a glance at Whitney, who didn’t respond. Amy had made him the same speech about not overprotecting Emma.

  “Could I go to camp, Aunt Whit?” Emma asked hopefully, and Whitney looked vague about it.

  “We’ll see, a year is a long time away,” was all she said, and Bailey questioned her when Emma went inside for a minute.

  “You don’t want her to go to camp?”

  “I don’t want her to get hurt again. She could have an accident at camp. We just got her back in one piece. I don’t want anything happening to her.” He nodded, and understood.

  “She’s having a ball here,” he said as he put an arm around Whitney’s shoulders and she thanked him for the delicious dinner. She was enjoying having him there too. “I’m the master of the barbecue. And the jet ski.” Whitney looked nervous when he said it, but didn’t respond.

  They told ghost stories at the outdoor fireplace until Whitney sent Emma to bed, and went to tuck her in, and then she came back and sat outside with Bailey for a long time enjoying the sounds of the night and the glorious sight of the moon over the lake. It was an incredibly romantic spot, and he kissed her longingly. He didn’t comment on the fact that she had assigned him to the cottage and not her room. He understood why, because of Emma. It would have been too awkward to do otherwise.

  He kissed her again before he went to bed, and when he walked into the main house in the morning, Whitney had made waffles, and there was a plate of crisp bacon on the table. She had learned to cook simple meals in the past year.

  “What’s our plan this morning?” he asked as he finished breakfast and thanked her. “Fishing or jet ski?”

  “Jet ski!” Emma said immediately, and he looked at Whitney, who nodded with a sigh.

  “Just be careful, and hang on to Bailey extra tight,” she told her niece. She watched from the dock when he took the jet ski out of the boathouse a little while later, and Whitney could see that he was being extra cautious and didn’t go at full speed with Emma sitting behind him. He only went faster after she had gotten off, and then he took it out for a spin on his own and had some fun with it. Whitney was grateful that he was careful with her. That afternoon he took Emma fishing for a while, before they all went swimming together, and the water was colder than ever.

  They made hamburgers and hot dogs on the barbecue that night, and Emma watched a movie and fell asleep with a bowl of popcorn sitting next to her that Bailey made her, after he made some s’mores again.

  “You’re going to spoil her forever,” Whitney said, cuddled up next to him under the stars, sharing a blanket. “You’re a tough act to follow,” she added contentedly.

  “That’s the whole point. This way, she’ll beg you to have me up every weekend. Next time I think I might fly to Reno. It would be quicker.” It had been a long drive.

  “I love having you here,” Whitney admitted. There was something so easy and comfortable about being with him. He was such a warm, kind person, and incredibly patient with Emma.

  “She didn’t have much of a childhood before the accident,” he commented, “the life of a child star.”

  “My sister was the original stage mother. But we didn’t have much of a childhood either. We were always meeting our mother somewhere that she was making a movie and couldn’t be with us, or being chased around by paparazzi. I hated it. Paige loved it, she loved basking in our mother’s glory…and then Emma’s.”

  “Do you think Emma will miss it?”

  “I hope not,” she said with considerable feeling. “I want her to have a better life than that. Paige and I used to argue about it. I just don’t think it’s a good life for a kid, either as an actor, or the child of one. It’s not a healthy life. People dream about it, but they don’t know what it’s really like.”

  “It’s so different from the way I grew up in the Midwest. Everything you did sounds so glamorous. I feel like a bumpkin compared to you. You must think I’m a real rube.”

  “Of course not, you’re a doctor. And that life isn’t glamorous. It may sound that way from the outside, but it’s not. It’s too much pressure as a kid, and even more as an adult. Everything’s for show, while the press chases you around. Nothing about it is real. It’s why I never wanted to have kids, or even get married. I’m not sure what I think about my mother anymore. I don’t know if she loved her life with my father, letting him make all her decisions for her. Or if she hated it and dementia was her only way out. It’s hard to understand other people’s relationships. I can’t even figure out my own.” He smiled when she said it. But she seemed more at peace than she had before. “I hated the fact that Paige dragged Emma into show business. She had her modeling at six months, and auditioning for parts a
t six.”

  “Emma has a better life now, thanks to you,” he said quietly. “Is that really why you never married?”

  She paused before she answered. “It just seemed too complicated to me. My father ran my mother’s life as though she were a child. He made every decision for her, what movies she was in, what parts she played, what she wore, how she did her hair, who her friends were, what the press saw, what they didn’t. He controlled every moment of her day and world. That’s what marriage meant to me when I was growing up. I never wanted someone to do that to me.” She had said it before and he could see that it had marked her deeply.

  “I’ve been afraid of that all my life, that a man would try to control me the way my father controlled her.”

  “Are you afraid of that with me?” he asked her for the first time, and she nodded. She wanted to be honest with him about her fears, so he would understand her hesitations. “I’d never do that to you, Whitney. That’s not what I want to share with someone. Marriage is a partnership, not a dictatorship.”

  “People say that, and then things get out of control. I never wanted to take that chance.” Which explained why she’d chosen men like Chad who kept their distance and never got involved too deeply. Bailey was different. He was right up close, which felt frightening at times, and so appealing at others.

  “So you stay alone forever? Or you keep people at arm’s length? That doesn’t sound like a happy life either. In fact, it sounds like a sad existence to me,” he said gently.

  “The other way is worse,” she said quietly, and he knew what he was up against. He had sensed it since he’d met her, from things she said.

  “Would you ever want to live with me?” She was startled by his question, but it was the crux of it for her.