Born Again

by Rena Marks

  “You wouldn’t mind?” she asked, as if it was too much to hope for.

  “No, of course not. We could have pizza, talk about our pasts, kiss and cuddle on your sofa.” He grinned. “You could change into something oh-so comfortable, like a big ole man-sized t-shirt with nothing underneath…”

  She laughed. “Pervert.”

  “Maybe. Go change and I’ll order the pizza.”

  Sara went into the bedroom and, just to razz him, wore a huge white t-shirt with skimpy red shorts that she used to exercise in. When she returned, Beau had removed his jacket and folded up his sleeves, sitting on her sofa flipping through the channels.

  “Anything good on?” she asked.

  “Nope.” He flipped off the television and used the remote to turn on the stereo instead. Soft classical music filtered through the room, as he responded to her clothing. “Trying to drive me out of my mind?”

  “You said something ‘oh-so comfortable’,” she reminded him.

  She sat next to him on the sofa, long lean legs curved underneath her.

  “I know when the pizza arrives you’ll stay right here out of sight. I don’t want some punk checking you out,” he said possessively.

  Maybe it was Francesca sharing her past with Aric’s ex-wife, but Sara suddenly wanted to know all about Beau’s life, too.

  “Have you ever been married?” she asked abruptly.

  He nodded, slowly.

  She blinked in surprise, suddenly feeling an irrational jealousy over a woman she hadn’t even known existed.

  “You were married once before?” she asked again.

  “I was married, yes. It was long ago and not a regular wedding ceremony that would be recognized today, but in our hearts, we were truly married. Soul mates.”

  “What happened?”

  “She fell in love with another man.”

  The horror on Sara’s face was evident. “Your soul mate fell in love with someone else?”

  “It was my own fault. I was too involved with my…family and I neglected her. To make up for it, I allowed her to spend time with another man, one that I trusted to watch over her, a bodyguard of sorts. She fell hard for him, but I pushed her to it.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “Like I said, it was my own fault. I pushed her into the arms of another, tricked her into it actually. I paid him to seduce her into my…religion.” Beau paused long enough for Sara to realize that the word was a replacement for a secret he still wasn’t telling her. “My deception backfired. Instead he seduced her for himself. Now I realize she still loved me, but I couldn’t see it at the time. I was too hurt, allowing my ego to rule my emotions. I was angry, frustrated, jealous, and I frightened her. There are no excuses for my behavior. But that’s all long ago in the past. Now, your turn. Tell me of your old relationships.”

  “My life is boring, really. I’ve had very few boyfriends and very bad luck with those. They always seem to turn psychotic on me.”

  “Psychotic?”

  “Yes,” she said earnestly. “I don’t know what it is. I used to think it had something to do with my psychic abilities, although I don’t know what. A guy starts out nice and then gets violent.”

  “Violent? Have you been struck?” he asked, fury in his voice.

  Sara actually had wanted to casually bring up the fact that she was psychic, but Beau focused on the one thing she didn’t want to highlight.

  “No, no,” she soothed, her hand reaching out to stroke his clenched fist. “They just seem to fight a lot with others suddenly. Around me. Pick fights in bars, stuff like that.”

  She never mentioned that she could also tell exactly how they felt about her. Exactly how they planned to get into her pants.

  He relaxed, but barely. “But no one has struck you?”

  “No, no one has ever struck me.” She smiled at him gently, her dimples popping into her cheeks.

  “You’ve never had a serious relationship?”

  “Not really. You and Aric are the most serious relationships I’ve ever had.”

  “You met us on the same day?” he asked carefully.

  “Yes.”

  “Do you prefer one of us to the other?”

  “No, I care about both of you equally.”

  “You’re sleeping with both of us,” he stated flatly.

  Oh, Lord. There was really nothing she could say to soothe his feelings. They were so very different, in looks and personality, yet she connected with both of them in different ways. She couldn’t suddenly become a born-again virgin and halt all sexual aspects of her relationships, even if she wanted to.

  What answer could she give that wouldn’t make the situation worse? She couldn’t deny enjoying Aric, but that didn’t mean that she enjoyed Beau less. Just differently. Would Beau stop caring for her when he found out how deeply she wanted each man and that she had no intentions of changing?

  “Yes. Does that bother you?” Her own voice had reached a cautious, flat tone. Would this be it? Would his jealousy force the choice of which man she’d be with? Instead, Beau drew back from the conversation, as if he knew how easily she’d run to Aric if he pushed the issue.

  “Of course. But I’ll have to live with it, won’t I?” he said lightly and feathered a thumb on the inside of her wrist.

  “I’m sorry.”

  He brought her hand up to his lips. “Don’t be. Just be with me now.”

  Sara encircled his neck with her arms. “I will. I missed you. I’m glad we have tomorrow night too.”

  He lightly kissed the top of her nose. “Me too.”

  The bell rang and Beau jumped up to answer it. “Stay,” he instructed and strode halfway across the room to the door. Looking back over his shoulder at her, he came back toward her and draped his jacket over her bare legs, grinned and went back to the door.

  He opened it enough just to have the pizza slide through and he thrust a handful of bills through the door, then returned with the steaming box.

  Sara laughed at his antics.

  “I’ll get us drinks and plates,” he said, putting the box down on the coffee table before her.

  He headed toward the kitchen and Sara leaned back. This was so nice, having someone take care of her. How had she lived her lonely existence for so long? Suddenly, she couldn’t imagine life without either Aric or Beau. She wanted them both in her life and couldn’t imagine having to choose one over the other.

  He returned in a flash to serve the pizza.

  “I haven’t had this in so long,” Sara moaned, taking the first bite. The gooey, melted cheese was sensory overload.

  “The next time you spend the night at my house, we can order it in again,” he said and looked up to catch her reaction.

  Sara caught it and raised her eyebrows. “Are you staying the night then?”

  Beau grinned, his mood playful once more. “Why, thanks for inviting me. I’d love to stay.”

  Sara laughed at his antics.

  “Okay,” she agreed. “You can stay. But only because you’re so hot,” she said, eyeing his muscles through his clothing. “Oh, you didn’t bring anything to wear, either.”

  “Nope. I’ll have to sleep naked.”

  She laughed outright at his foolishness. “Well, you’re a guest in my house. The least I can do is be naked with you.”

  When the pizza was finished, they flipped through the television channels.

  Sara lay across Beau’s lap and was so comfortable she began to nod off. It was the last thing she remembered.

  Beau smiled wryly and smoothed the hair across her brow. She was exhausted. He lifted her gently, cradling her against his chest and carried her to the bed.

  Still she slept. Carefully, he reached under her t-shirt which had twisted around her waist and pulled her panties down.

  God, that was a mistake. A growl nearly erupted from his throat at the sight of her. Slowly he pulled the large shirt from her head, exposing full, beautiful breasts.

  He was al
most weak with need for her, the creamy, luscious woman curled on the cotton sheets. He stripped himself bare and lay down with her, pulling her body onto him.

  It was the only way he could sleep, his huge erection pressed against her soft belly.

  * * * * *

  The alarm rang softly, birds chirping in the room.

  “You have got to be kidding me,” Beau muttered.

  Sara laughed softly against his smooth, bodybuilder’s chest. “I like birds. I like to wake up at the same time, every day.”

  “Baby, normal people wake up to ringing. Or loud music. Not birds.”

  “It’s a soft, relaxing way to wake,” she insisted and slipped from the sheets. She padded nude to the shower, as unselfconscious as Beau always was.

  Beau watched every curve of her luscious body, then followed her into the shower, smiling after grabbing another condom.

  He startled her when he slid the sheer curtain aside and stepped in close behind her. He reached for the bar of soap in her hands and soaped her body slowly, washing every silky inch of her. Suds covered her body, from her shoulder blades which he’d lovingly kneaded, to her breasts with the nipples peeking out from the bubbles. He thoroughly covered himself in soap also and then lifted her slender thigh with his big hand. He set her foot on the raised seat in the shower stall and was instantly hard from the sight of his tanned hand possessively covering her slim thigh.

  He slid his erection deep inside her from behind. She was swollen and slippery, obviously anticipating this since he bathed her. He wanted to growl deep inside, but he couldn’t allow himself that luxury. It was too close to the full moon, he’d lose control.

  He kept his strokes slow and measured, not wanting her to know how frantic he became during this time of the month.

  Sara moaned and tried to thrust back at him, encouraging him to move faster. He held her hips still in his palms and rocked even more slowly into her.

  “Shh, baby, just enjoy,” he murmured near her ear.

  When she held still, he rewarded her by tracing her clitoris with his large fingers. They parted a trail through her silky soft, feminine flesh and when he grasped the bud with his thumb and forefinger, she exploded, grinding her hard nipples against the shower tiles.

  She quivered against him while he let himself release into her fully, possessively. His throbbing cock emptied itself with a burst followed by quick jerks and he sucked on the side of her neck.

  He gently pulled from her body and turned her to the spray, allowing the water to gently massage any sore muscles on her legs. He disposed of the condom then soaped them each again and then rinsed.

  Flipping off the water, he grabbed for the thick, fluffy towels and wrapped her first. She was soft and dazed and he felt smug satisfaction that he could give her that much pleasure.

  He wrapped his own towel across his hips. His hotter body temperature would dry him off in a few minutes, but he wanted her comfortable first.

  Rubbing her gently, he steered her toward the dressing counter. “Dry your hair. I’ll make breakfast,” he said, kissing the shell of her ear and making her quiver in her sensitive state.

  He left the steamy bathroom to make breakfast with the towel still around his hips.

  Sara dried her hair as fast as she could, since she had a hot man in her kitchen fixing breakfast for her. She left the bathroom fifteen minutes later and dressed quickly, finding Beau setting plates on the table.

  “Mmm, pancakes. My favorite, how did you know?” she said after quickly kissing him.

  “Wild guess,” he said wryly. “I myself find them disgusting. I have bacon, sausage and eggs.”

  “What’s on the agenda for today?”

  “I have a conference call at four, so I’ll head home later. Then I’ll pick you up for the theater at six, okay?”

  “Lovely.” She grinned and bit into her breakfast.

  It was hard when he left for his phone call and Sara realized it was those pesky abilities poking through. She ought to do a reading when he left to see what she could learn, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to.

  She felt devastated when he left her apartment and her place suddenly seemed empty and lonely.

  Maybe that was it. His presence warmed and enlivened her life and now it was back the way it had been previously.

  But not for long, she consoled herself. He’d be back in a few hours and tomorrow she had Aric. This might just work out after all.

  She sat down to read the paper and noticed in the weather section that the skies were finally clear. And it was close to a full moon.

  Why in the world would she care about that? Sara’s heart raced as she realized she consciously sought out the knowledge of when the full moon arrived. She’d never cared before and she had no reason to care now.

  The thoughts scared and comforted her, in a strange way, like she was grateful for the full coming. Such odd, conflicting emotions had her once again glancing at her tarot cards.

  And deciding against them.

  For the first time in her life, she felt uneasy with her abilities.

  Chapter Seven

  Sara finished dressing and headed toward the kitchen to wait for Beau. Their date was wonderful the night before and she looked forward to the theater with him tonight. And then, tomorrow was her night with Aric and Raphael and Francesca. A night of steamy, erotic, hot and heavy sex that she was looking forward to. Not that she didn’t look forward to sex with Beau, but there was no way he’d join in on a foursome.

  A soft knock at the door sounded and Sara opened it to find Aric instead of Beau.

  “Hi,” she greeted, raising her face for a kiss. “This is a surprise. Come in, I’ll fix a glass of wine.”

  Something gleamed in his eyes before he stepped over the threshold. He followed her into the kitchen, where she poured two glasses of wine.

  “Aren’t you going out with Beau tonight?” he asked.

  “Yes. He’ll be here in twenty minutes or so.” She smoothed her soft green gown with her fingers. “I think I may be overdressed.”

  “You always look lovely.”

  “Thank you. Now, what’s the real reason you’re here?”

  “I just wanted to see how you felt about Francesca and Rafe now that we’ve gotten so…close.”

  “I’m fine. Francesca and I have become friends. I really like her, Aric,” she said, her face turned up earnestly. “I don’t have a lot of friends, but I know I’m going to be sad when they leave for Romania again.”

  “They return quite frequently.”

  “So she said, but still…”

  He laughed at her distress. “Come here, let me comfort you.”

  She went willingly into his arms and he rested his chin on her head. He twined a lock of her hair between his finger and she smelled the clean scent of her lemon shampoo. She wondered if he could smell it, too.

  “What the hell are you doing here?”

  She’d left the front door slightly ajar and Beau stood in the doorframe, his face dark and glowering.

  “Beau,” Aric said.

  Beau entered the apartment, a tight scowl on his face.

  “Beau,” Sara cajoled, a hand on his arm. “It’s nothing, really.”

  “What is he doing here?”

  “You can ask me. I’m standing right here.”

  “I did ask you, asshole.”

  They were in each other’s faces.

  “Stop it,” Sara said. “Beau, Aric just stopped by for a second. He knew I was going out with you.”

  “Did you still plan to go out with me?”

  Her jaw dropped. “Of course I did.”

  “Let her be,” Aric commanded and Beau’s face darkened. “I merely stopped by to check on her.”

  Beau was angry enough to strike out at Aric and now that she thought of it, Aric didn’t look so calm himself. The same violence was there under his polished façade, as if he itched for a fight as much as Beau did.

  Did she never learn? S
he attracted violence and that was why she’d always stayed away from permanent relationships, preferring instead short casual flings. How could she have forgotten that in these heavenly few days?

  “Wait,” Sara said. “Maybe,” she said slowly, “maybe this isn’t working out after all. This relationship, I mean. I think the two of you need to leave, give me some time alone to think.”

  “Sara,” Aric started, but she interrupted.

  “No, really.”

  “What about the theater?” Beau asked.

  “I’m sorry. I’ll have a miserable time, so I’m sorry you wasted the tickets.”

  “You said you’d come over tomorrow after work,” Aric reminded her.

  “I’m canceling. Both of you, please leave.”

  Beau was about to say something else, but when Aric saw the look on her face, he cut him off. “No, let her be. She’s right, she does need time. Let’s leave. You and I need to have a few words alone anyway.”

  Sara locked her door behind them and walked into her bedroom, where she sobbed as she undressed. It was great while it lasted. But how could she have been so stupid? To have pushed such a simple fact of how she bred violence to the back of her mind. It was why she was alone and always had been. Not only did she have the weird ability to feel things, but she seemed to attract and nurture the violence in people. Maybe she should have picked one man from the beginning instead of trying for them both. Still, who knows what would have happened?

  It was hard to breathe around the lump in her throat and her eyes felt sore and swollen with the tears she’d shed. Her beautiful green gown was hanging in the closet and she’d only worn it for half an hour. Still, that gorgeous dress would always remind her of Aric, for that was the gown she’d brought from his place.

  She knew what she had to do. The good times were over. It couldn’t go past this point.

  Sara curled into the middle of the bed, naked and alone, a torrent of hot tears trailing down her cheeks. Silent, this time, because her sobs were done.

  * * * * *

  The next day wasn’t much better. Her eyes were red-rimmed and during the midmorning, Sara confided to a coworker that she had man troubles.