Grey_The Infatuation

by Allison White

  “I refuse to be your plaything because you can’t get over your ex,” I cut him off and look at him, disbelieving what he really expects me to do. Be a girl he plays with while still maintaining his whorish reputation of not being locked down by that very girl. It’s sick.

  “She hurt me pretty bad, Liv,” he says. I can’t tell if he’s tearing up or if it’s the water seeping through his long eyelashes, which is growing colder with each second of this dreadful conversation. “I was barely able to function after she and I split.”

  “And you’re hurting me right now,” I say and sigh. I take a deep breath and look away from his intense gaze. He tips my head back and smiles at me.

  “Why do you need us to have a title so bad?”

  “I just want the satisfaction of knowing what we are if I’m going to be as open to you as I was last night,” I tell him. “But if you don’t think I’m enough for that…that’s fine. I’ll just leave.”

  Why am I saying this? I don’t want to leave him. I want to wrap my arms around him and kiss him and wave this entire conversation away as if it never existed. But a big part of me knows that I have to confront him on this or I’ll never be able to live with myself.

  I sidestep him and pull back the curtain, but he pulls me right back and closes his eyes to gather his thoughts. It physically kills me to see him this way. This…heartbroken. But I can’t take back the words that have already been said or are about to be said. I can’t protect him. I can only protect myself, and I hate it. I hate myself for hurting him this way. But it is necessary. I am worth putting him through this.

  “Grey.” I turn from his touch, but he forces me to look into his swirling dark eyes. “There’s no point in this if we aren’t anything. I want something real.”

  “And last night wasn’t real?” He looks up and furrows his brows.

  “Yes, but—”

  “Then give me a chance,” he pleads, cutting me off. I let him and stare into his eyes. “I—I’m still affected by something that happened years ago. And it’s silly and stupid. But I can’t help it. It—it fucked with me, and I can’t move on knowing that I can hurt you too. All I’m asking is for you to give me one chance. Just one. I may not be ready now, but trust me enough that I will only stay true to you and you only.” He presses his forehead against mine and closes his eyes as if to brace for impact. My impact, I guess.

  I cup his face and let the tears drip down my face, mingling with the freezing water pelting our bodies. I spread my fingers over the stubble growing over his jawline and across his high cheekbones. I take the moment to assess every curve, the dimples embedded in his cheeks, to the small scar resting above his right eyebrow, in case this is the last time I see it.

  I am stuck. My mind is practically begging for me to think rationally and weigh his probable faux plea for a chance and the high chance that he will hurt me. Again. It’s trying to tell me that he just subliminally told me that he’s still hung up on the past and most likely won’t be able to really commit to any kind of relationship. I usually listen to my mind because it has been right almost all of the time in every situation I’ve ever encountered.

  But how can I when I can lose this beautiful man in front of me?

  Screw my mind, I want you.

  “Okay.” My voice is barely audible.

  His body perks up, and his eyes fly open, with the cutest and brightest smile I honestly wish I could take a picture of. Too bad my phone is in the other room and isn’t waterproof. He grips my waist and gently holds my chin in his hand.

  “Seriously?” He sounds really shocked.

  “Yes,” I say and frown. “What did you think I’d say?”

  He freezes but keeps his smile and nervously laughs. “I thought you would have said no and left me heartbroken.”

  Trust me, I was considering it…

  “Well, be grateful I said okay.”

  “There’s my mean girl,” he whispers with a wide smile before leaning down to press his lips against mine, but I put a finger against mine so he kisses my knuckle.

  “Can we get out of here, though? My body is a sack of raisins now, and it is freaking freezing.” I cover my chest and jitter side to side. He laughs and nods and reaches over to turn off the faucet.

  While he’s facing away from me, I slap his ass, like he did to me ten minutes ago. Payback’s a bitch, I say cockily in my head.

  He gasps and whips around to glare at me jokingly. “Did you just—?” I slowly nod, and he growls and nods to the curtain. “You better run before I catch you. I’ll even give you a head start. Five seconds. One…two…three…”

  Squealing, I hop out of the shower, grab a towel, and quickly wrap it around me in case David’s still here and run to Grey’s room. He catches me the moment I do and hoists me into the air. The towel falls, and he and I perk up our eyebrows. As if we are connected, I wink at him and gasp, then squeal in shock when he pushes me back on the bed. Our morning is spent with my lively giggles and annoying-ass jokes, and my heart overruling my mind in joy for once.

  I don’t follow my heart over my mind often, so I’m praying this works out and doesn’t end with me getting my heart crushed. But as I gaze down at this hauntingly exquisite man making even more marks on my chest and he looks back up at me with the most exuberant smile on this earth, I have a pretty good feeling that won’t be the case. And if it is…then I won’t mind getting ruined by this alluring vandal.

  Chapter Eight

  “Do you have any plans for today?” I ask Grey as I sit up in his bed. My legs are still buzzing and my breath is trying to catch up with my body after what just occurred. I think we need to slow down, or my legs will convert into Jell-O sticks.

  He runs his hand through his disheveled hair and shakes his head.

  “No, why?”

  I shrug and bend to pick up my bra he excitedly flung to the ground. An image of his feverish smile and the white blur passing my peripheral vision creates a smile to curve my lips.

  “No reason,” I say and glance at his unreadable expression. He’s pulling on a new pair of gray boxers. “I just don’t have anything going on besides studying, but I want to take a little tiny break for today. The only one I could catch by now is Psych, and even then, we’ve already missed a good thirty minutes.”

  I’m not blaming him or anything. To be honest, I didn’t really feel in the mood to go anyway. Not when he could teach me a thing or two on how to have my eyes roll back in my head.

  This is shocking; I’ve become a sex bunny, and I haven’t even had sex yet. And I’m blowing off school? Who am I becoming?

  “I guess we can just hang out…” he says with noticeable amusement and hesitance. “I’ll break out the neighbor’s Netflix and we can chill.” He winks at me, and I laugh.

  “I know what that means, so no. At least, not for a while.” I smile sheepishly and look away.

  “Oh, just you wait. You’re gonna be waiting days for your pussy to re-adjust with me,” he brazenly says.

  I groan in revulsion and press my palms against my ears. His laugh is muffled, and he leans over the bed to peck my lips.

  “You are so juvenile,” I say against his lips.

  “You’re juvenile,” he says with a tilted smile. “I’m up for some burritos. Want some? They’re, like, a few minutes away, so it won’t take long.” He stands and tugs on a crisp white t-shirt, stepping out of the room.

  “No, thanks.” Spanish food does not agree with me, and I don’t even want to risk embarrassing myself in front of him. Not this early into our whatever-this-is relationship.

  After clipping on my bra, I hold my underwear in my hands and stare at them in disgust. I didn’t really think this whole “staying over” thing through. To be fair, I didn’t think I would be sleeping at his place after our date. It was a total surprise, which means I didn’t pack a bag of fresh clothes. I’m fine with wearing the bra and the dress and the one heel. But what I am not fine with wearing is…this. I was so
aked from the rain, and that mixed with the crazy arousal Grey flushed through me that led straight to these bad boys, it does not make a good combo.

  “Before you order anything, we have to stop by the dorms,” I call out, gingerly stepping into my dress. I let out an air of frustration as I stare at the one shoe, it’s sister lying somewhere in the road, broken and lonely.

  “Why?” He steps back in and tips my chin to look up at him. “I have you here now. I’m not letting you leave,” he says and kisses me. The sparks between us will never settle. In fact, I’m sure it grows and grows each time we touch.

  But I pull back and shake my head. “I’m not staying there. I want to be here. But I need to change.”

  He glances down at my dress and the sad heel, then back to me, nodding. “Okay, so why are you still holding your panties?” He raises a questioning eyebrow at the underwear in my right hand.

  I shyly look away and curve my hair behind my ears. The look of mischief on his face, from the shining in his eyes and the crook of his lips, is palpable.

  “They’re a bit…indisposed at the moment,” I say, and he chokes back a laugh. Barely. “It’s not funny. I just need to get new clothes. I can either walk or—”

  “All right, all right. Don’t get your panties in a twist,” he says and gasps. “Wait, but you aren’t wearing any.” He waggles his eyebrows with a horribly teasing smile that reddens me in the face.

  “You sicken me.” I poke his stomach and walk away, but he takes my hand and spins me around. I can’t help but let out cheerful bits of laughter. I land against his chest, and he gently brushes back a chunk of my wild hair.

  Along with panties and fresh socks, I definitely need a brush. I cannot walk around with hair like this.

  “And you confuse me,” he says with a sigh. “You giggle like I wasn’t between your legs ten minutes ago.”

  “This is exactly what I was talking about,” I say and raise a brow with a mocking smile.

  He rolls his eyes and nods to the open door. “Let’s go before I change my mind and keep you here for an eternity.”

  “That doesn’t sound healthy,” I joke, narrowing my eyes. “And I need shoes.” I point at my bare feet.

  “I have just the thing for you.” I don’t like the glint in his eyes. He holds up a finger to wait, but it’s not like I’m going anywhere. He walks over to a door on the other side of the bed and comes back with a pair of peach flats. I eye it with confusion. “Left over from a…companion.”

  Oh…

  “Oh,” I voice my thoughts.

  “Don’t worry, it’s not infected or anything. Plus, it’s small and you’re small. Take it or you can lug around in my boots. And as cute and hilarious as that sounds, I don’t want you tripping with every step you take.”

  I stare at the flats. I have a pair like these…the girl had taste.

  “Fine,” I give in and gingerly take the shoes from him. He smiles as I drop them and slip my feet in without taking my eyes off of him.

  He tugs at my hand, and we exit the building, walking up to his car in all its black glory. He looks ridiculously cool as he struts over to the driver’s seat, slipping on a pair of sunglasses and pushing his dark, still ruffled, hair back. I look away before he can catch me staring, though. God only knows that’d boost his ego, and I know it’s already through the roof. I get into the car.

  Speaking of which, I really need one of my own. I hate having to depend on other people. It looks like I’ll be spending time with Grey, here at his house, but eventually I’m going to want to go back or grab something and come back. Plus, I’m eighteen and spending my first year at college. It was inevitable that I would travel around town, like to pick up my medicine or to go shopping. And apparently, to visit and leave my…significant other’s place…? I hate that I can’t give him a clear name—us a clear name—and have to dance around for a title. But back to the point—I need a car.

  “Do you know any good car dealerships around?” I ask as I clip on my seatbelt.

  “Yeah, why? Thinking of getting one?” He glances at me briefly before pulling out onto the road.

  “Yes, but it’d have to be after Thanksgiving break,” I tell him. “There’s no point in getting it now if it’s going to be sitting by itself for five days.”

  He nods and holds up a finger. “Question: Do you have a secret job I don’t know about?”

  “No, but my father practically begged me to get me one last year. I didn’t see a reason for it because I never went anywhere, but now—”

  “Oh, shit, you are a rich little princesa,” he cuts me off and barks out a laugh. It sends chills down my spine, and it’s not just because I’m only wearing a short dress.

  I slide down in my seat and let out an embarrassing groan. “Don’t hate me.”

  “Why would I hate you?” He laughs and looks over at me.

  “Because I don’t need to have a job to get a car.”

  “So?” He shrugs and waves a hand at me. “I don’t call you princess without a reason, babe. I knew you were one when I first laid eyes on you.”

  “Don’t remind me,” I mutter, remembering how much I despised him when I first saw him and how much that loathing grew ten times more when he began calling me “princess.” It’s funny how much I detested the nickname, but now every time I hear it, it’s like someone shocks my heart and sends it into overdrive.

  I look over at him and admire the way he looks so cheeky and obnoxious the way he whips his mouth back in an ear-biting grin.

  The rest of the car ride is silent, save for the radio on low, but it is a serene silence that I accept with open arms.

  When he pulls into the dorm’s parking lot, I promise to not take long and exit the car. He pulls me back in and presses his sweet lips to mine. After letting a chuckle slip past my greedy lips, I jog into the building. I avoid the weirded-out stares by the people hanging out in the lounge room and casually walking around the first floor. It looks like I’m doing the dreaded walk of shame. Only difference is there’s no shame. If anything, for me, it should be called the walk of bliss.

  I insert my key into my door and say while entering the room, “I’m coming in!” just in case Julia and Jaimie are here doing the unthinkable.

  I first see Jaimie, who is upside down on my bed, her black hair hanging down, a magazine held up to her face. But when she hears me, she pulls the magazine away, gasps, and sits upright, slightly wobbling from the fast action.

  “Same clothes she left in. One heel in hand. Crazy hair,” she states and gasps even larger than the first time. “Bambi got laid last night, didn’t she?” she exclaims and throws her arms in the air.

  “Not rea—”

  “Come here, you naughty thing!” she screams at the top of her lungs and jumps off the bed to tackle me with a hug. She squeezes me so tightly, I’m afraid my head will pop off like a bobblehead getting squeezed by a python. Fearing her fangs will unleash and plunge into me, I lean my head back and assure her I didn’t lose my virginity. Right after I tell her I might lose my life if she doesn’t loosen her grip.

  “You’re. Killing…me,” I grit out and cough for air for emphasis.

  “Oh, whoops!” She pulls away and blushes bright red. “Sorry. But you fucking popped that cherry! Whacked away those cobwebs!”

  I hold a hand up before she can make any more incredibly insulting analogies.

  “I didn’t lose my…nothing happened like that last night,” I tell her, stumbling over my words a little.

  Her face drops.

  “Phooey.” She pouts like a child, and I roll my eyes. What is up with her and anticipating me losing my virginity?

  I walk over to my dresser and get a pair of pale pink underwear to put on. “So what did you to get up to last night?” she asks, and I bite my lip to hold back a giggle. This boy has me wrapped so tightly around his finger, it’s insane.

  “Nothing,” I tell her as I unzip my dress and let it fall to the ground. I step ou
t of it, fold it, and place it in my hamper. I glance at her leaning on my study desk with an unbelieving, amused look. Before I can show her that I lied, I turn my heated face away and say as I step into a pair of jeans, “Why do you care, anyway?”

  “Just curious…” Wait for it…I pull on a white V-neck as she adds, “I’m totally lying, but can you blame me? Grey, the brooding asshole, falls for you, the wittle cute Bambi out of the hundred—” I frown, and she waves a hand, nervously laughing. “I mean, the few girls he’s banged, and bam! You two are a thing. And a frisky little thing at that. I see those marks on your neck and chest—don’t try to cover them up, either.”

  I gape at her, trying to form words. “What we do is none of your—”

  “Oh, don’t even try that.” She guffaws with a wave of a hand, as if batting away my ridiculous words. “You might as well just tell me all about last night.”

  I shake my head and turn around. “I won’t, because nothing happened.” I unzip my backpack and put in my stack of books on the floor. I have a feeling I’ll be sleeping over at Grey’s again. The thought sends a bowtie to wrap around my stomach and sends a smile on my face. I stand and put in another shirt, a cardigan, and a pair of socks. I take a pair out now and zip my bag before sitting on my bed.

  “Those hickies aren’t singing the same tune as you,” she sing-songs, and I look up at her as I tie my black high-top Converse. “Tell me about your freakish night with that asshole!” she moans and shakes her leg out in frustration. I stand and swing my bag over my shoulder.

  “Maybe later,” I say and hoist the bag up my back. I pick up my hairbrush laying on the dresser and begin brushing my crazy curly hair.

  “After your total sleepover with a piece of hunk?” she says.

  “Where’s Julia?” I try to change the subject.

  “She’s re-taking some test. Don’t change the subject, you tricky girl!”

  I face her and sigh. “I’ve gotta go.” I walk over to the door. “But I’ll talk to you later.” I head out and hear her scream.

  “You better! You have my number!”