Watching Over Her

by Terry Towers

  As she walked away, I glared at her back, though it wasn’t necessarily her that I was upset with. I was more upset with my own carelessness. I’d thought it would be safe enough to venture out in public together as a couple with being more than one hundred miles from the base. Who’d have thought someone would see us – to recognize both me and her? What were the chances? Evidently, not so astronomical. All I’d wanted was a weekend with Olivia that wasn’t all skullduggery and sneaking around. One where we could freely be a couple without consequence. It would have been more prudent just to spend another weekend in my apartment ordering in and vegging in front of the television, even though I knew she was as tired of having to hide away there as I was.

  ~*~ TT ~*~

  I wasn’t entirely surprised when the major asked to see me two days later. In the back of my mind, I’d been expecting Carrie to report me to the C.O., and I’d been quietly dreading it, while trying to work out a response. Should I deny it and assert that I was strictly her tutor? Should I defend our relationship? Share my intentions? Olivia wasn’t just some fuck buddy, she mattered to me. Asking her to move in with me hadn’t been a spur-of-the-moment ask, I’d been tossing the idea around in my head for several days prior. I’d never been with a woman who matched the person I was so wonderfully. However, in the end, as I stepped into his office, I hadn’t decided on a firm strategy and was just going to improvise.

  Giving the major a salute, I waited for him to offer me a seat, which he immediately did. Sitting down, my back straight and eyes looking directly ahead, I asked, “What can I do for you, Sir?”

  “It’s about what you’ve already done.” Major Vanburen rubbed the bridge of his nose. He and Olivia shared the same hair and eye color, but little in the way of facial features aside from that. I’d never seen any pictures of her biological mother, but I could only guess that was where she’d gotten her good looks.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Olivia seems to have gotten over that Michael Ackles asshole. She’s not moping around the house. She hasn’t mentioned his name in weeks and she seems happy. Not to mention you’ve helped get her out of the shitter with that math class. You did a fine job, Sergeant, thank you.”

  “It wasn’t a job. You were right, she just needed a friend and a little help understanding the material in a course she wasn’t prepared for.” I tried to keep my tone neutral, not to reveal anything.

  “Like I say, the fact that she’s also getting through that class is a bonus, Sergeant. I think she’s finally got herself straightened out.”

  “That’s good to hear, Sir.”

  Major Vanburen sighed, sounding weary. “That being said, I think it’s time you stopped being so friendly with her.”

  I swallowed the lump that was beginning to form in my throat. “Why, Sir?”

  “I may be getting old and don’t claim to have a firm handle on the innermost feelings of my daughter, but I’m also not a complete idiot. It’s come to my attention that my daughter might be feeling more than friendly for you, son.” He leaned back in his chair, and it hissed when the hydraulic mechanism caught. Putting up a hand, he added, “That’s not an accusation. I know you wouldn’t betray my trust and take advantage of a young girl who is emotionally vulnerable, but it strikes me that Olivia could end up getting hurt in this situation too. That’s the last thing I want. I didn’t even think about that when I asked you to show her a little courteous male attention, that she’d misinterpret that attention. The pitfalls of raising a teenaged girl, I suppose.”

  Olivia was hardly a young girl. I resented that he referred to her as such. Olivia was a smart woman who was attending college and finally learning to live with some independence. To be her own woman.

  “I’ve gotten to know her as we’ve worked together getting her grades up. She’s become a good friend, Major. She’s been through a lot and I would never hurt her.”

  “I’m sure you wouldn’t mean to, but I’ve made my decision. She’s fine on her own with the class and if she needs additional help I’ll find a real tutor for her.”

  I gritted my teeth, keeping myself from saying the sorts of things one shouldn’t and couldn’t to a commanding officer. “I see what you’re saying, but don’t you think it’s going to hurt her feelings if I stop being her friend? She’s just starting to develop relationships.”

  “Those relationships will develop faster without you for her to use as a crutch.”

  What could I do? I had no argument, and the truth wasn’t going to win me any points, especially after the major’s comment about his confidence that I wouldn’t betray him. “We have a tutoring session tonight.”

  “Go ahead and finish up today’s session, but don’t be planning any more study dates. Her overall grade in the class now is a B. Like I just said, if she gets into trouble, we’ll arrange for someone else to help her.”

  “Very well.” I clenched his hands into fists to hide my emotions. “Is there anything else, Sir?”

  “No. Dismissed.” As the major returned to his paperwork, I got to my feet and walked calmly from the room. With deliberate steps, I went into the restroom, turned on the water and dryer to provide noise, and slammed my fist against the wall, unleashing the fury I was feeling onto the brick and feeling a surge of pain race up my wrist and arm. The surge of violence quickly faded, leaving me feeling pained and hollow, as I faced the grim reality of severely curtailed time with Olivia.

  We had no other option if we wanted to be together. We had to fess up and if things went too bad she’d move in with me. I could always request a transfer. Certainly no guarantee I’d get it, but it may be the only alternative.

  ~*~ TT ~*~

  Olivia

  After dinner, as per his request, I stopped by the den where my father was already hard at work with something. My textbooks were in my backpack, but I had no real plans for studying. Popping my head into the room, I said, “Hey, Dad. What’s up?”

  He waved a hand, signaling for me to enter. “Come sit down for a minute, kiddo.”

  Uh oh. It must be bad news if he was using that endearment. “Kiddo” was reserved for the really bad news. With a frown, I sat in the wingback chair near his, by the fireplace. “What’s wrong?”

  Dad sighed. “I think you’ve been spending too much time with just one friend. You need to diversify your interests. You’re in college now, you need to be making new friends there. It’s a fresh start for you.”

  My stomach clenched. “What do you mean?” Did he know about me and Evan? No, he couldn’t, or he wouldn’t be so calm.

  “I just want to see you spending more time with other kids your age. Evan is a nice young man, but you two can’t have enough common interests to sustain a close friendship. It’s not healthy for you.”

  “We have a lot in common. He’s my best friend.” That was certainly true. He was also way more than that, which was a truth my father wouldn’t handle well at all.

  My father sighed again. “Look, Olivia, I just don’t want you to get hurt. I’ve already spoken to Evan earlier today, and he knows how I feel about this. Tonight is your last study session.”

  I shook my head. This couldn’t be happening. “So, I’m just supposed to never see him again?”

  “If there’s some sort of group event then it would be unreasonable for you to not go because he’ll be there. I’m not completely irrational. But the one-on-one sessions at his place will be coming to an end.”

  I frowned. I was eighteen years old! This wasn’t his decision to make! If it weren’t for the fact that he could cause issues for Evan’s career there wouldn’t be any decision to make. “I don’t understand why you’re doing this. You’re the one who said it would be fine to be friends with him.”

  “Friends is okay, but I’m worried you might be thinking about something else. You’ve just gotten out of a relationship that had you in a depression, you don’t need to head down that road again. Evan is a man, you’re still a teenager. You can only ge
t hurt if you get too close to him.”

  Tears swam in my eyes. Evan was part of my every day. I couldn’t go not seeing him. “You’re the one who is hurting me now, Dad.”

  His face settled into an unyielding line. “Better now than later, when it’s worse. You’ll get over it. The way you’re acting right now and by the look on your face I can tell I’ve made the right decision.”

  I wanted to continue arguing, but decided there was no point. From past experience, I knew he expected his commands to be followed and once he’d had his mind settled onto something that was how it was going to be. His unyielding nature was a large chunk of the reason my mother and he got divorced. Generally, I’d fall in line, but not this time. I just wasn’t about to voice that to him – yet. Not until I had all my ducks in a row. Standing up, I pushed my shoulders back and lifted my chin, straightening to my full 5’8. “Fine. Whatever.”

  Without waiting for a response, I turned my back on him and stormed from the study. Anger kept me going until I was close to Evan’s apartment. Tears filled my eyes and streamed down my cheeks, forcing me to slow down to fifteen miles per hour in order to keep driving. Parking outside of his building I sat in the car for a moment, swiping at the blasted tears, grabbing a tissue from the glove compartment, and blowing my nose. I didn’t want Evan to see me in this condition so I gave myself a few minutes to get hold of myself before getting out of the car and slamming the door shut behind me.

  Somehow, I managed to keep it all together long enough to get to the door of his apartment and knock on the door. The moment he opened the door, I threw myself into his arms and the sobbing started all over again. My entire body felt numb as he closed the door behind me and with an arm over my shoulders, guided me into the living room. Sitting on the sofa, I leaned against him, crying against his shoulder until I had no tears left to cry. “What are we going to do now?” I asked in a choked tone, not even explaining why I was upset. There was no need, he knew why.

  Evan sounded grim. “I guess the same thing we’ve been doing – lying and sneaking around. At least until we come up with a better plan.”

  I sighed. “I hate having to do that. I wish we could just have a normal relationship.”

  Evan began to knead the back of my neck and I moaned softly; that was just what I needed. “So do I, but what are the alternatives? We could stop seeing each other, but that’s not even an option in my mind.”

  I shook my head, unable to imagine not having Evan in my life. “Not an option in mine either. I’ll move out first.”

  “I could tell your dad I’m in love with you, but I don’t think that would go over well. We could confront him with the situation and if it affects my career then it is what it is. My job is one part of my life.”

  Shuddering, I shook my head again. “It’s your career. You’ve worked so hard to get where you are. It’s not fair to you to take that risk for me.” I tightened my arms around him. “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if he took our relationship out on you in that way.”

  “Chances are it’ll be harder to tell him if we don’t tell him soon. If we go months, heck, years running around behind his back he’ll be furious by the time it comes to the point where he has to be told.”

  “I just… I’m not sure…”

  “Let’s just go talk to him now and let the chips fall as they may. My career isn’t worth losing the woman I’m in love with.”

  Slowly, I lifted my head from his chest as his words penetrated. “You’re in love with me?”

  He frowned. “Of course.” Evan’s frown deepened, lines forming on his forehead, and he gave a little laugh. “I guess we’ve never said it before, huh?”

  “No, we haven’t.” I felt a mixture of awe and fear as I placed my palms flat against his chest and stared up into his dark eyes. It amazed me that he felt the same way about me as I did about him, but the intensity of my feelings also scared me. My feelings for him were so much stronger than I’d ever felt for Trevor or Michael, and they’d both cut me deep and I’d taken it so hard. What if the same thing happened with Evan? How could I survive the pain? Besides, it was too soon to be feeling this way, wasn’t it? Then again, he’d asked me to move in with him the other day. He wouldn’t have brought it up if he hadn’t been serious.

  His chest expanded under my hands as he took a breath. I could see his affection for me in his eyes, a reflection of what I felt for him. “Well, here it goes then. I love you, Olivia.”

  My lips trembled as I uttered the words that had been on the tip of my tongue so many times now, but I hadn’t the courage to say them before now. “I love you too, Evan.” My heart felt like it was going to explode in my chest as I felt a surge of exhilaration unlike anything I’d ever felt before, but I was also afraid of what it meant for our future.

  Chapter Nine

  Olivia

  The next two months were excruciating, in fact they were the hardest two months of my life, worse even than when I was tending a broken heart over Michael and moved back to California. It was difficult sneaking around to see Evan; our time was usually brief, ending way too quickly. I also hated not being able to see him whenever I wanted. If not for the help of a couple of classmates who soon became a couple of my closest friends, who covered for me on a regular basis, I wouldn’t even get to see him the once or twice a week we managed to squeeze in.

  My confusion had deepened as well. I wanted to be with Evan, but I wasn’t certain about the seriousness he seemed to take for granted. He often spoke about our future, and what we’d do once we came out and into the open with our love. On many levels, his vision of our future appealed to me, but a small part of me remained doubtful. I was experiencing something I never imagined I’d feel. Even though I wanted to be with him with all my heart, I also wanted to experience life before settling down. He hadn’t mentioned getting married or having kids – yet – but that seemed to be the road his mind was beginning to travel.

  Evan was up for a transfer within the next six months. Once transferred, our relationship would be a non-issue since my father would no longer be his C.O. so his personal feelings toward us would no longer be relevant. It could be out in the open and his career wouldn’t suffer. But what if he ended up overseas? It was unlikely, but not impossible; if he got transferred that far we’d be lucky to see each other once per year. How could we sustain a relationship with that kind of absence? On the other hand, I always had the option of changing schools, moving with him, and that would be that.

  With a sigh, I pushed away my heavy thoughts and finished packing my toiletries. I looked up when Stephanie knocked on my door jamb. “Come in.”

  “Are you all set?”

  I nodded. “Thanks again for letting me go to San Francisco with Tia and her mom this weekend.”

  “You’ve earned it, keeping your grades up without a tutor, and getting your life back on track. Your father and I have been so proud.” My stepmother’s words were cheerful, but she had concern in her eyes.

  “It’s been hard.” It was difficult to keep my grades up while hiding my relationship with Evan. Stress had also made it difficult to sleep. Sometimes, I thought the lack of sleep might also be from not having Evan to cuddle against at night. We had only spent the entire night together a handful of times, but I’d grown accustomed to sleeping in his arms in just a short amount of time. Fortunately, I’d have two nights with him this weekend, since he had booked us a room in the same hotel as Tia and her mom.

  “You seem to have a lot on your mind.” Stephanie sat on the corner of my bed. “Is there something you’d like to talk about?”

  It was so tempting to spill everything, to get her input, but I held back. I knew Stephanie wasn’t impressed with the idea of me even being friends with Evan; she’d lose her mind and run back to Dad faster than you could blink with the information. My father and stepmother discussed everything.

  Reluctantly, I shook my head. “No, not really. I guess my first year of college had been
harder than I anticipated; it’s taking some adjustment. Wade and Madison both said they sailed right through their first years, but it isn’t working that way for me. I can blame it on not getting able to select my first-choice courses all I want, but the fact still remains that it’s been a hard adjustment.”

  Stephanie smiled. “They’re full of it, sweetie. They both worked hard and struggled, everyone does. It’s not high school anymore and there’s a lot more expected of students. In fact, I recall your father saying that Madison almost failed one of her classes the first year.”

  I grinned. “It’s hard to imagine Madison failing at anything.”

  “Sure, maybe not now, but she was different as a teenager. You’re a totally different person when you’re eighteen than you are when in your twenties.” My stepmother reached over and touched my arm. “You want different things out of life when you’re in your teens than when you’re already established in your career.”

  Frowning, I wondered if my stepmom was saying something beyond the surface of her words. “Yeah, I guess.”

  “Don’t rush into any hasty decisions at your age, hon. Who or what you want now might change completely by the time you’re twenty-four.”

  Spooked by the specific ages my stepmom mentioned, I mumbled, “Yeah.”

  “Did I ever tell you about my first real, great love?”

  I made a show of going through the motions of sorting my cosmetics, but I had a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. “Um, no. I don’t recall you ever mentioning boyfriends before you met my father.” God, I really didn’t want to be talking to her about this. Her love life prior to Dad was none of my business and I would have preferred to remain in ignorance.

  Stephanie laughed. “My first love was my sociology professor my freshman year at UCLA.”