Unmasked (Revealed #1)

by Alice Raine

  Once the bath was full and bubbly Sean climbed in and wafted his hand to indicate that I should get in and sit between his legs. As I sank down into the relaxing water, Sean pulled me backwards so I was resting on his chest with my hands laid on his strong thighs, and his arms around my waist.

  ‘Is the water OK? Not too hot?’ he murmured by my ear, and I nodded. It was perfect, and I could immediately feel my earlier anxiety about his imminent departure seeping away. We’d be fine. Of course we would. It was only a few months that we’d be apart.

  We soaked for half an hour in companionable silence before Sean encouraged me to sit forwards so he could begin washing my hair for me. I smiled to myself as he began his quiet task, humming to himself happily as he trailed his fingers through it repeatedly to lather it up, rinse it, and apply a conditioner. This was still a regular occurrence when Sean was here. He’d insist on washing and drying both my body and hair at every opportunity that he got. At this rate, after another month I’d have completely forgotten how to clean myself.

  If Sean had his way I’d never be allowed to wash or brush my own hair, because he really was quite obsessed with it. Especially when it was super long, like it was at the moment. He loved to burrow his face into my neck and inhale, and I frequently woke up to find him stroking it reverently. On more than one occasion he had also twisted great swathes of it around his fists whilst we were making love, which I had to say was incredibly erotic.

  Earlier this week, I had finally won one small battle, and I now got to return the bathing favour by loading up Sean’s sponge and scrubbing him down, a task I had thoroughly enjoyed. I did the same today. Once he had finished tending to me I turned and straddled his lap, taking his sponge and starting to wash across the flat planes of his chest. To be honest, when he lay there willingly for me like that, looking completely content and watching my every move with a small smile, I could totally see why he enjoyed doing it to me, because the satisfaction I gained from such a simple task was immense.

  Once we were both squeaky clean and Sean had dried me off thoroughly, we wandered back into the bedroom and began to dress, both of us selecting clothes from the hangers in my wardrobe where Sean now had a section to one side.

  Our relationship might still be ridiculously new, but Sean had practically moved himself into my house over the last few weeks. Initially, when we’d reunited and knew we would have at least five weeks together before he flew off, Sean had tried to persuade me to stay with him, which I would have loved to, of course, because his house was beautiful, but it was too far for me to travel to school every day. Once I’d told him that I’d only be able to visit him at weekends he had mumbled about it being ‘completely unacceptable’ and had sat looking miserable until I’d laughed and jokingly suggested that he stay with me instead. Without uttering a word, he had stared at me for a minute or so, a faint smile twitching on his lips, then disappeared off in his car only to arrive back a few hours later with several bags of clothes and belongings from his house. Just like that, he’d moved in. Well, I had offered, I just hadn’t actually expected him to take me up on it. Not that I was complaining; it had been lovely having him here.

  Once we were dressed, Sean looked at me unhappily and pulled out one of his holdalls with a sad smile. ‘I guess I better pack some of this stuff to take with me. Can I leave a few things here?’

  ‘Of course.’ My voice was squeaky, my throat already closing up at the thought of him going. I was going to miss him so much. Watching as he folded his smarter clothes to pack, I saw him leave a pile of T-shirts and some jeans in the cupboard. Amongst the clothes being left behind was his favourite ‘round the house’ T-shirt – a slightly faded but much loved Pearl Jam shirt – and I immediately knew that I would be wearing it in bed tonight to help ease the loss of him.

  ‘I’m actually going to have to get going pretty soon, babe, because I need to pop across to my house to pack the rest of my things and get to the airport for four.’ He sounded casual and unperturbed by this statement, but I was already missing him, and he hadn’t even left yet. Was he not upset by the prospect of two months apart?

  ‘OK.’ Once again, my voice was tight with emotion, but this time Sean must have noticed because he turned to me, his own eyes looking a bit glassy, then dropped the holdall from his hand and dragged me into his arms. Ah, this was better. A proper emotional goodbye so I knew I wasn’t the only one with wildly out of control feelings. My arms looped tightly around his waist as his face descended into my hair, drawing in a long, deep inhale, before his lips claimed mine in a fiercely hungry kiss that instantly had me melting against him and groaning loudly.

  His tongue swept around my mouth with its usual lazy skill, exploring, teasing, and dancing with mine as if he was making sure to get a thorough final touch to remember me by. After well and truly claiming my mouth, Sean leant back and rubbed the tips of our noses together, but I noticed that his eyes were squeezed shut. Perhaps the thought of his imminent departure was upsetting him just as much as me.

  ‘God, Allie, I’m going to miss you so fucking much.’ His eyes popped open, and seeing his beautiful blues combined with the raw emotion in his voice finally tipped me over the edge as my eyes brimmed over and several tears rolled down my cheeks. Lifting a hand, Sean gently wiped them away with his thumb, a sad smile gracing his lips. ‘Hey, no tears, my gorgeous girl. You’ll be busy with school, and I’ll be hectic with work, so time will fly by. We’ll be back together before you know it.’

  I really hoped that was true, because he hadn’t even left yet and I was already falling apart inside.

  NINETEEN

  Sean

  Forget any ideas of being the strong, confident male in our relationship; it was less than two minutes after leaving Allie’s house and me was a complete mess. Banging a hand on the steering wheel in frustration, I winced as my knuckles hit awkwardly and began to throb straight away. At least I had managed to hold it together in front of her, I suppose. She was the one who mattered. She’d been brave about my departure, but seeing those few tears escape from her eyes had nearly killed me.

  It was almost impossible for me to comprehend the strength of the bond between Allie and I. I’d never felt anything like it before. Of course I’d experienced attraction, lust, and desire over the years, but this thing with Allie was … simply all-consuming. A connection so intoxicating that it made me feel and act in ways I never had before. I felt like I was discovering a whole new side to myself, and I was loving every minute of it.

  The primal need to care for her and protect her, however, was driving me crazy and starting to make me totally irrational. How could I keep her safe when I was on a whole other continent? I felt my breathing quicken just at the thought, as panic began to seep into my system. Deep down I knew she didn’t need me to keep her safe; Allie was an independent, feisty, sensible girl, but there was some deeply ingrained part of me that felt the overwhelming need to do it. Maybe it was lingering thoughts of Elena’s accident causing these feelings in me. Or perhaps the age gap making me feel so protective over her?

  The stressful thought of being apart from her for so long was almost enough to make me consider hiring someone to keep an eye on her for me … but Allie would no doubt go ballistic if I did that. It would certainly put my mind at ease, though, so I didn’t discount the idea entirely.

  Clenching my jaw, I resisted the urge to turn the car around and go back to her, but the further I drove from her house, the more I could feel panic rising inside me, smothering my sensibilities and clouding my vision. Classic panic attack symptoms. Fuck. I hated how feeble I felt when I had these attacks, but I seemed to have no control over them since Allie had walked into my life. No amount of muscle or brawn could cover the fact that I had this incredible weakness where she was concerned.

  Pulling the car over to the edge of the road, I flung my head back on the headrest and drew in several deep, long breaths as my fingers rhythmically clenched and unclenched on the st
eering wheel. I couldn’t believe I wouldn’t see her again for over two months. That was an absolute eternity. Fuck. I needed to get some control over the way I felt about her, and quick, otherwise I was going to have a complete meltdown at the side of the road and do something insane.

  Like quit my job.

  My eyebrows rose at that thought. It wasn’t like I needed the money. The series of action films I’d done in my early career had actually made me enough money to easily live on for the rest of my life. I could quit now and never have another financial worry ever again. With the way I felt right now, it was a seriously tempting notion. I wasn’t entirely convinced that Allie would be thrilled at having my neurotic arse at her side twenty-four seven though. In fact, I was so completely infatuated by her that I’d probably end up pushing her away with the overwhelming strength of my feelings.

  When I looked at it that way, perhaps it was best if I went back to work. I was so out of my depth with regards to how strongly I felt for her that actually, the distance could work in my favour and help me normalise my emotions a bit, level off the way I acted so possessively around her, and set us up for a more stable long-term relationship.

  Long-term was good, that was what I wanted. And needed, with Allie.

  Nodding my head decisively, I rubbed at my sore knuckles and then rolled my neck to relax the tense muscles bunching there. OK. I could do this, I could leave her in the UK and head off back to America and back to work. It was the right thing to do. Besides, it was only temporary.

  As I focused on slowing my breathing I winced as I thought again about the way I had taken her this morning so roughly, and not even with protection. I felt like an utter shit, because truthfully, I had remembered my lack of a condom just before I came, but some crazy, primitive part of me had wanted, no, needed, to somehow mark Allie as mine before I left, so I hadn’t pulled out. That made me a prize bastard, didn’t it? It was fucking crazy the way she made me act. I was fucking crazy. God, Allie deserved so much better than me.

  Had I wanted to get her pregnant? Wincing, I shook my head and ran a hand through my hair. Maybe. Who knew? I barely felt like my head was screwed on straight anymore. Huffing out a sharp breath, I shook my head, hoping to shake some sense back into it. From her statement of ‘I’ll get it sorted’ I assumed she meant the morning after pill, so pregnancy didn’t look like it would be a probability. As crazy as it seemed, I couldn’t decide how I felt about that.

  As much as I wanted to hide away and try to clear my head where Allie was concerned, I couldn’t. In fact, if I sat here at the side of the road for much longer, then I’d be in serious danger of missing my flight this afternoon.

  Reluctantly starting the car again I pulled out into traffic, still with my mind stuffy and full of images and feelings relating to my girl, but suddenly a scowl fell onto my brows as I thought about my impending trip. First a flight to London where I would kill a few hours and then eleven plus hours cramped on a fucking plane back to the sun and supposed glitz of LA.

  In my early career, I had loved the excitement of days like this; packing up my suitcase and flying off to the glamour and easy living lifestyle that America offered to young actors like me. I literally wanted for nothing when I was there, whatever I requested would be promptly delivered: speciality food, made-to-order drinks, women … you name it. I could get it if I wanted it. Not that I took advantage of these perks of my job – not any more, anyway.

  As well as flying back to America, I would be travelling back to Savannah Hilton, my co-star, and one of the most demanding women I had ever met in the business. I had no doubt that she frequently took advantage of her famous status, as she was prone to throwing tantrums at the drop of a hat whenever she didn’t get her own way.

  Seeing as she was also on a constant quest to get me to sleep with her I was sure she’d be just thrilled to hear that I now had a girlfriend. Sighing, I shook my head and tried to focus on the road ahead. That would be an interesting conversation, that was for sure.

  TWENTY

  Allie

  I stared at the dark curtains of my bedroom, wondering how long it would be until I could see any faint tinges of morning light seeping through them. Hours probably. I daren’t even look at the clock yet. It was probably only one or two o’clock in the morning, which would mean a depressingly long time until I needed to get up. Releasing a long, weary breath, I ran a hand over my face, trying to push away the feeling of exhaustion clinging to my skin.

  After Sean had left yesterday I had kept myself busy planning some of my modules for school and had ended up staying up late in the hope that exhaustion might help me sleep. It hadn’t. I’d barely slept a wink and was already awake again.

  After spending huge amounts of time with Sean over the past four and a bit weeks, I’d quickly become accustomed to his presence in my house, and as a result, yesterday afternoon and evening had seemed eerily quiet, not to mention depressingly snuggle-free. He might be a little over the top with his constant contact and caring, but I already dreadfully missed the attention from Sean. And now, there would be no being woken up twenty minutes before the alarm for a cuddle or sexy time either. All in all, my life had become rather boring, rather quickly.

  Even wearing Sean’s T-shirt all afternoon hadn’t really helped much, apart from to distract me from work because I kept sniffing at the fabric like some weird, scent-obsessed stalker. In bed, I’d continued the trend and buried my face in the pillow he’d used, inhaling the lovely, spicy, smoky smell that remained, but instead of helping me get to sleep it just seemed to remind me of his absence.

  Blurgh. This was rubbish. Flopping onto my back I wondered if Sean was having any of the same withdrawal symptoms. Probably not, he was no doubt too busy sliding back into his star-studded lifestyle of cameras, screaming fans, and sunshine. Although, actually, given how long the flight time was, he was probably still on the plane. Sighing, I sat up, finally giving up all attempts at sleep and decided to get a coffee to drink in bed.

  This morning was so early that it really called for an extra pick-me-up, so I opted to grind some fresh beans for my coffee to make it a little more special. Poking my nose into the bag of Columbian beans, I pulled in a deep breath, the familiar smell immediately making me smile. These were the same brand that Sean used, purchased by him last week when my supply had dwindled from the presence of two coffee junkies co-habiting in my little house. As it was Sean’s favourite, I knew that it was also going to be the brand I bought from now on.

  Once I had brewed and poured my morning coffee kick I climbed back upstairs, snuggled myself against the head board, cradled my mug in my hands, and finally risked a look at the clock.

  Five in the morning. Ugh. And it was February half-term this week too, so I didn’t even need to get up for work, which was just typical. Unfortunately, it wasn’t just missing Sean that was keeping me awake, because although he might be far away for the time being, he had left me with one thing to remind me of him, hadn’t he? Which unfortunately meant a very embarrassing trip to the doctor’s was on the cards for me today.

  Grimacing, I sipped my coffee and tried to slow my nervous heartbeat. I couldn’t believe that I was going to have to go and get the morning after pill. Just the thought of having to say it out loud to Dr Massey filled me with dread and made my stomach churn. I’d never needed one in the past, and the thought of having to go today just made me feel careless, stupid, and juvenile. Wasn’t this what uneducated, drunken teenagers did?

  I was getting myself too worked up about it, and could really do with a supportive voice to help calm me, but Sean was on a plane, Cait was back in America, and Sarah probably wasn’t even up yet. Doing a brief count I realised that, actually, with the time difference it was only nine at night in LA, so chances were that Cait would still be up.

  Grabbing my iPad, I loaded Skype and saw the small green icon next to Cait’s name, indicating that she was indeed online. I wasn’t sure I’d ever been so pleased to see a
green blob in my life, and wasted no time in pressing the button for video call and shuffling myself more upright.

  After an impatient wait while the call tried to connect I finally saw the screen flicker to life as Cait’s jerky image appeared on screen, her chestnut hair looking like a wild mass around her face until the screen settled and she came properly into focus.

  ‘Howdy, stranger!’ she greeted with a grin that immediately made me feel a bit better. ‘I didn’t think we were set for a Skype today, but I’ll never turn down a chance to chat to my favourite bestie.’

  ‘Hi, babes, no, we weren’t, but I’ve gotten myself in a bit of a pickle and wanted some reassurance.’

  Cait frowned, tucked her hair behind her ears, and nodded. ‘Hang on, I’m in the communal lounge, let me move somewhere a bit quieter.’

  I watched as the video bounced around as Cait and her phone obviously walked somewhere else, before the screen righted itself and I saw her now sitting in front of a large bookcase, a look of concern on her pretty face. ‘What’s up?’

  Oh God. Now it had actually come to the point where I had to say it out loud, this call suddenly didn’t seem like such a good idea. Maybe I should have used the simple call option, then at least Cait wouldn’t have been able to see the flush of mortification now spreading on my cheeks.

  ‘I, um … well … what do you know about the morning after pill?’ I blurted.

  Watching Cait’s eyebrows rise in surprise, I cringed, fully expecting to see a judgemental look on my friend’s face, but was almost immediately surprised when she burst out laughing instead. ‘Seriously? You’re asking me this question? The girl who doesn’t date?’ Joining her in a small smile I immediately realised my mistake. As my best friend, Cait could give me fantastic reassurance and support, but since her experience with Greg the twat she had lived a completely celibate life, so she was hardly the most knowledgeable when it came to issues relating to sex. To be honest, I’d been so desperate for a friendly face that it hadn’t even occurred to me.