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Fashionably Fanged

Page 18

by Robyn Peterman


  “Not a problem,” Tiara promised.

  “I have an announcement,” Sunny shrieked over the sound system. “Everyone on stage immediately. This is a disaster.”

  “Oh, shit. What now?” I asked falling into line with my group.

  “Only one way to find out,” Martha said. “Let’s go hear what the bee-otch has to complain about now.”

  The stage was filled with confused contestants and panic-stricken handlers. We stayed toward the back so no one could come up behind us. Vlad wasn’t expected until the actual show in two days, but none of us were taking chances.

  “No more rehearsal,” Sunny screamed over the mic.

  The sounds of hands slapping over ears would have been almost humorous if the volume of her voice wasn’t so painful. We were Vamps for God’s sake. She didn’t need the mic to start with.

  “The new backer of the entire pageant system has insisted the show go on tonight.”

  “What?” one of the handlers screeched and then passed out cold on the floor.

  Someone dragged her off the stage and threw her into the wings. Lovely.

  “That’s right,” Sunny snapped, pulling on her hair so hard I was sure a clump was going to come out in her hand. “The motherfu… um, the gentleman is putting up millions to keep the tradition alive and kicking. It’s totally not the way I run things, but matters have been taken out of my hands.”

  “Translation,” Tiara whispered. “Vlad paid her a fortune under the table.”

  She was probably correct. What was the damn hurry?

  “Surprised he’s pushing the pageant up,” Gareth murmured. “If this is about Claudia, why doesn’t he just try to kidnap her?”

  Interesting point. Wait. Maybe Vlad was aware that Rachmiel was outed as the Angel he’d worked with and he was running scared. He must want Claudia something awful to go to all this trouble.

  “I was just thinking the same thing,” I told him. “It has to be the pageant itself, along with Claudia. The intel Ethan had said he was addicted to beauty pageants.”

  “Everyone. And I mean everyone will bow down to our new benefactor,” Sunny announced. “He will be arriving in four hours. I’d suggest all of you get ready. Immediately.”

  The busty D’s were running around like headless chickens and freaking out. However, I couldn’t even enjoy the ridiculous sight. My adrenaline had skyrocketed and I was ready to go.

  “He wants the adoration,” Gareth said with disgust. “He’s a narcissist. Vlad wants his ass kissed before he takes Claudia and runs for his worthless life. Stupid.”

  “For him, not for us,” I said. “If he believes Roberto is on to Rachmiel, he’s gotten desperate. He’ll be sloppy.”

  “True,” Gareth agreed. “But I still say he’s a fool.”

  “Gotta agree with you there, Dickie—I mean Ginny,” Jane corrected her gender blunder. “That fucker is so stupid, I’ll bet he thinks Taco Bell is a phone company.”

  She cackled at her joke. I had to admit I even smiled at that one. She was all kinds of whacked, but the old bag was funny.

  Not to be left out, Martha had to add her two cents. “How bout this? He’s so stupid that if the ball of stank worked for M&M’s he’d get fired for throwing out the W’s.”

  “Wait. I’ve got one,” Tiara insisted, hopping up and down. “He’s such a stupid buttsnatch that he’s depriving a village of an idiot somewhere.”

  “Outstanding,” Martha congratulated her.

  “Can I play?” Claudia asked with a giggle.

  “Go for it,” Jane encouraged her.

  “That son of a bitch is so stupid he cooks with Old Spice!”

  “As pleasurable as it is to listen to you ladies blaspheme the bastard, we have plans to make,” Gareth said with a chuckle.

  “And we also have Angels watching,” Martha whispered, nodding her head to the audience.

  She was correct. Azriel and Azbogah were seated in the house watching the shitshow ensue with lazy smiles on their beautiful faces. They also were very obviously checking out the women—and not in an academic way.

  “What in the ever livin’ butt-brigade are Angels doing here?” Tiara demanded. “Are they after Claudia too?”

  “No,” I assured her quickly. “We’re on the same side for the most part. They’re watching us. They want Vlad as well.”

  “Fucker’s quite the popular asshat,” Tiara hissed.

  I nodded and then stiffened with excitement. The timing was perfect. All the contestants were practicing their walks and strutting around the stage like their pants were on fire. Sunny was having verbal smackdowns with about thirty freaked out handlers down stage left. The chaos was to my advantage.

  “Gar…Ginny, give me your bag,” I said, developing the plan as I spoke.

  Gareth handed me his big man-purse that didn’t go with his Diane von Furstenberg dress even a little bit. I peeked inside and grinned.

  “Tiara, Claudia, and Ginny, go to the edge of the stage and practice posing or do something pageant-y like that. I’m going out into the audience. Martha and Jane, go over by Sunny and see if she’s saying anything worth hearing. I don’t want you near Gareth right now—can’t have any connection made. Gareth, you will not attack the Angels when I flirt with them. Am I clear?”

  “No,” he snapped as his eyes went green. “You’re not.”

  “Do you love me?” I asked.

  “You know I do.”

  “Do you trust me?”

  “With my life.”

  “You want to get Vlad?”

  “Redundant question,” he said, squinting at me and trying to figure out what I was up to.

  “Then don’t attack. I need you to stand at the edge of the stage and look hot and hard to get.”

  “Holy shitballs, what the hell are you up to, Boss Lady?” Jane asked with a wide grin.

  “I’m up to no good, but I’m pretty sure it will turn out exactly the way I want it to,” I replied as I separated myself from the group and made my way into the audience.

  At least I hoped it would.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  I approached from behind without them detecting me—so much for the Angels being the top of the food chain. I could have taken their heads without them ever knowing who did it, but the boys were busy. The Angels were far too occupied rating the women and talking about bagging them. They were celestial pigs and that was beyond fabulous with me.

  “What a lovely surprise to see two such handsome, divine studs sitting in the audience,” I whispered from behind them, making both of them jump in surprise. “Must be my lucky day.”

  Whipping their heads around, they relaxed when they recognized me. First dumb move on their part.

  “Ahhh,” Azriel purred as his eyes lit with sexual interest. “It’s the gorgeous one. I was hoping to see you again without that tiresome Vamp in tow.”

  “Yes, well, here I am,” I said, leaning forward so they got a nice view of the girls.

  “So it appears the showdown will happen tonight,” Azbogah said with his eyes glued to my cleavage.

  “I know,” I said with a vapid giggle. “I’m so excited.”

  I bounced in my chair and their heads bounced in rhythm with my jiggling breasts. Pig was too nice a description for these two Heavenly horn-dogs.

  “I was hoping I could ask a favor from you,” I said with another silly giggle. Inwardly I cringed at my stupid girl act, but the boys were buying it.

  “Favors require payments,” Azriel said with a smile that verged on a leer.

  “Of course.” I twisted a curl with my finger and ran my tongue over my lips. I had them right where I wanted them. “But I’d like to make it more interesting.”

  “Go on, pretty Vampyre,” Azbogah said, indulging me with a condescending smile that made it clear he thought I was an idiot.

  Second dumb move on their part…

  “I’ll bet you couldn’t seduce one of the gals on stage and get a promise for a date
after the show tonight,” I challenged casually with a sexy little squeal thrown in for good measure.

  “This is too easy,” Azriel muttered under his breath with a covert glance to Azbogah. “And if I can? Do I get to seduce you too, my lovely thing?”

  I was not his thing. I was no one’s thing. However, I nodded and demurely let my chin drop to my chest. “Yes,” I whispered in a sultry tone.

  “I take it that it would turn you on to watch me with another first?” Azriel suggested, getting excited.

  God, men were so easy. “Yes,” I said softly. “It would make me, um… very aroused.”

  “And let’s just say, for the purpose of the game, that I lose?” Azriel inquired cockily, clearly believing I was a pretty gal without a brain cell in my head.

  “Then you will grant me a favor,” I replied, running my hands down my body.

  “Deal,” he said, ignoring the calculated look Azbogah had thrown my way.

  Azbogah was clearly the smarter one, but I only needed one oversexed idiot to get what I needed.

  “Pick one,” Azriel said, openly adjusting the large erection in his pants. “I can get any of them.”

  “Are you sure?” I asked, egging him on.

  “Positive,” he assured me with a smarmy wink.

  “Azriel,” Azbogah warned only to be ignored by his buddy.

  “Do you like that one?” I asked pointing to Ginny-Gareth. “I think that one is gorgeous.”

  Azriel’s overconfident laugh made me bite down on the inside of my cheek. “Had my eye on that one already. Two minutes,” he promised. “I’ll bag that beauty in two minutes.”

  “Do it,” I squealed and let my girls bounce in agreement.

  The Angel practically flew to the stage to conquer his prey. Holding back my laughter was difficult, but I was still seated with Azbogah.

  “You just set the randy bastard up didn’t you?” he accused with a put upon sigh, staring at me with admiration in his eyes.

  “Yep,” I said, letting go of the vapid girl persona I’d adopted.

  “Are you sure there’s no way in Hell he’ll get that one?” Azbogah asked skeptically. “He is quite the ladies’ man—and he is an Angel.”

  “It’s the ladies’ man part that will be a problem for him,” I explained as I reached into Gareth’s bag with my right hand and pulled out the rope of silver.

  “Interesting,” Azbogah said as we both watched Ginny knee the aggressive Angel in the balls and then land an outstanding punch to his nose. The blood spurted everywhere as Azriel grabbed his face and shrieked.

  I was quite positive that Azriel wanted to smite Ginny-Gareth where he-she stood, but the room was crowded with Vamps who were now all freaking out over the melee on stage.

  “Well, aren’t you as crafty as you are beautiful,” Azbogah commented as he watched his cohort get his ass handed to him.

  “But wait… there’s more. And in three… two… one,” I said as Sunny fucking exploded in a rage and literally flew across the stage and attacked Azriel.

  The Angel was now being pummeled by about thirty pissed off Vampyres. It was every kind of awesome. He had to lay there and take it or else reveal what he was. I knew there was no way in Hell he was allowed to show his wings. Roberto liked his Angels to work undercover and from the tales I’d heard the punishment for revealing oneself was horrifying.

  Azbogah turned away from the beat-down of his partner on the stage and placed his laser sharp focus on me. Titling his head to the side, he grinned. “And what is it that you want?”

  Lifting the silver up, I handed it to him. His look in his eyes was the only evidence he was shocked I could handle the metal—the rest of him stayed very still.

  “Bless this. I need it.”

  “That’s all you wanted?” he asked with a chuckle of disbelief. “You could have gotten this without humiliating Azriel. He won’t take kindly to being made a fool of.”

  “Wasn’t sure with you guys,” I told him with a shrug of indifference and a sinking feeling in my gut. It wasn’t a picnic to be on the bad side of an Angel, but that was the least of my problems right now. “Will you do it?”

  “Don’t seem to have much of a choice seeing as how we lost the bet,” he replied, annoyed. “When do you need it?”

  “Now.”

  “Pushy little Vamp, aren’t you?”

  “That’s one way to put it.”

  “May I ask you a question?” Azbogah inquired.

  “If you bless the silver now, yes you may,” I shot back.

  His laugh of appreciation at my tactics warmed me, but he was a dangerous being, and I knew it. Azbogah could end me with a flick of his fingers. We were on the same side this time luckily for me so I hoped I’d make it out of the conversation in one piece.

  “I will.” He nodded and glanced back at the commotion on the stage.

  Sunny had Azriel by the ear and was marching him out of the auditorium swearing at him profusely. Gareth stood on the stage with his focus glued to me and Azbogah. He’d kept his word about not getting involved, but he was watching like a hawk.

  “Why were you so sure that the female Vamp would deny Azriel?”

  “She doesn’t go for men,” I replied easily.

  “She’s a lesbian?”

  “No. Not at all. She’s a man.”

  Azbogah’s belly laugh drew a few stares, but most eyes were still cemented to the Sunny and Azriel show. He turned and stared at the stunning woman on the stage who was shooting daggers from her eyes. “It’s Gareth,” Azbogah whispered with a hard won respect in his voice. “That bastard will stop at nothing.”

  “First off, he’s not a bastard,” I informed him with a raised brow. “He’s legitimate and he’s mine.”

  “Lucky bas… man,” Azbogah said with a grin, taking the silver into his large hands and closing his eyes.

  He muttered quietly in a language that sounded a bit like Latin with a magically musical flair. He held the silver low to the floor and it glowed brilliantly as the words tumbled melodically from his lips. The air surrounding us crackled and sparked a bit, but the focus was thankfully not on us.

  Azbogah’s magic was mesmerizing and all-enveloping—warm and liquid soft. It would be incredibly easy to get lost in the enchantment of an Angel. I felt sad and empty when he finished. Handing me the silver and grabbing his cell at the same time. He quickly read the message and hissed out a curse.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked, alarmed.

  He glanced at me in assessment for a beat and then smiled a vicious smile. “Roberto has located Rachmiel. Azriel and I are needed. I’d suggest you and your girlfriend get Vlad tonight. Rachmiel is a slippery one and holding onto him to break the curse will be a challenge.”

  My insides buzzed and I tucked the blessed silver back into the bag with care. This was very good news.

  “Thank you,” I told him as he stood to go. “And tell Azriel I’m sorry.”

  “Are you?” he asked with a lopsided grin that made the man breathtaking.

  “Nope, but it sounds good, doesn’t it?”

  “Good luck little Vampyre. May God be with you.”

  On that note, he disappeared into thin air leaving only a small blast of glitter behind.

  One thing down and a whole shitload more to go.

  “I didn’t like watching that one bit,” Gareth growled. “It took all I had not to kill him.”

  “Which one?” I asked with an innocent grin. “Azriel or Azbogah?”

  “Both,” he muttered.

  “Didn’t it feel nice to rack an Angel?” I prodded him.

  Shaking his head and laughing begrudgingly, he narrowed his eyes at me in fun. “Yes, it was very satisfying to place his testicles in his esophagus, but I saw them eyeing your chest. That’s my chest. They are not allowed to ogle it. Ever.”

  “Hush now, boy,” Martha said. “You got your own titties. Venus got that dang silver blessed and that’s gonna burn the mother humping Hel
l out of Vlad. I say she did some fine fucking work.”

  Gareth was speechless at being spoken to that way by Martha, but the old woman was correct—wildly disrespectful—but correct. I did do good work and Gareth did have his own set of temporary girls.

  Biting back my smirk with tremendous effort I told him, “Azriel thought you were hot.”

  “And now I’m simply ill and appalled,” Gareth griped. “My boobs don’t even help.”

  Tiara and Claudia approached and moved our little group to the far side of the stage, away from the still panicky contestants and handlers. From the way the gals were practicing, you’d think the prize was for Queen of the World.

  “Sunny wants Claudia to meet with Vlad before the pageant,” Tiara said in a tight voice.

  The Fairy-Demon-Vampyre was holding on by a thread. I admired her control, but knew it wouldn’t take much for her to snap.

  “Where?” Gareth demanded.

  “In the Green Room,” Claudia whispered.

  “Green Room?” I asked. There were entirely too many terms I didn’t understand.

  “The waiting room,” Jane explained. “It was the huge room with all the couches and a chandelier we passed on the way to the dressing room that you did the nasty with Gareth—I mean, Ginny—in.”

  “She did it with Gareth, not Ginny,” Martha said. “Pretty sure Venus is straight.”

  We all ignored them. If we commented, they’d continue. We had no time for that.

  “What time?” Gareth asked, checking the time on his phone.

  “Six,” Tiara confirmed. “Pageant is supposed to start at seven thirty.”

  “Will Sunny be there?” I asked, trying to get as much intel as possible.

  Tiara shrugged. “She didn’t say. I tried to volunteer to greet him as well and was told absolutely not. Claudia was to go alone.”

  “That sure as Hell won’t be happening,” Gareth said sharply. “Are there windows in the room?”

  “Not sure,” Jane said.

  “Jane and Martha, come with me. We’re going to case the room and all the exits. Venus, stay with Claudia and Tiara, and see if you can get anything else out of Sunny,” Gareth directed as he began to cross the stage with the old coots on his heels.

 

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