An Indecent Longing

by Stephanie Julian

  Dumbstruck, Ian’s brain misfired several times before he could speak again. “Are you fucking serious?”

  “Yes, I am. So, you wanna tell me what the fuck is going on or do you wanna tell me to shut the fuck up and mind my own business?”

  Ian considered his options for a few seconds. “She spent the night at our house.”

  The silence from Adam’s end was deafening for a second. Then he started to laugh. “I’ll be damned. I owe Tristan money.”

  Before Ian could think of a response to that, Adam continued.

  “So I take it you’re okay with the job? I mean, Tris and I could—”

  “No. She’s ours.”

  Adam’s quiet laughter came through the phone. “Gotcha. No problem. Just wanted to make sure Antonoff wasn’t fucking with us for some reason.”

  No, they were fucking Karel’s doctor. Big difference. “Did he give you any specifics?”

  “Yeah, but here’s the kicker. He said you’d know why. Then he said you should contact him. I’ll text you his number.”

  “Okay.”

  “Hey, Ian.”

  “Yeah?”

  Adam paused for a beat. “Careful with Antonoff. He’s…a different kind of criminal. Much more focused and much more attached to his people than you’d think. You’d almost think he cared about them.”

  And Dorrie was one of his people.

  That fast rush of rage he always had when anyone mentioned Antonoff didn’t surface immediately, and it baffled Ian.

  “Do you have any idea why someone would be targeting his people?”

  “No. Haven’t heard anything but I haven’t really been listening.”

  What Adam didn’t say was he hadn’t been listening since his dad and his uncle had sold the Philly “business” to Antonoff and headed back to Russia.

  “Okay. Guess I better make the call.”

  Adam didn’t immediately sign off. “Listen, Ian. I know you have some history with Antonoff. And good reason to hate the guy’s guts. Don’t let it cloud your judgment. The guy is absolutely one of the smartest men you will ever meet and he can spot bullshit from a mile away. Treat him like you would any other client and keep your emotions out of your dealings with him.”

  Yeah, that was going to be an issue. But since they were dealing with Dorrie’s safety, he’d make it work. For her.

  “Thanks for the heads-up, Adam. I’ll talk to you later.”

  He disconnected and got the text with Antonoff’s number seconds later. Before he had the chance to even think about what he was going to say, Ian made the call.

  The man himself picked up on the second ring.

  “Mr. Keller, thank you for calling. I assume Adam filled you in.”

  No bullshit, no small talk. Less time for Antonoff to piss him off.

  “Yes, he did. Ben and I will take the job.”

  Ian wondered if the bastard was smiling. But he heard no amusement in the man’s voice when he answered.

  “Thank you.”

  “What can you tell me about the threat?”

  “Nothing at this point. And that’s not because I don’t want you to have the information. It’s because I don’t have enough information to give you. You know who I am, Mr. Keller. I receive threats on a daily basis. Typically, they’re directed at me or at my daughter. This is the first time Dorrie’s been targeted. Trust me when I say I will find out by whom, and when I do, I’ll take care of it. Anything pertinent to Dorrie’s safety will be passed on to you. Your reputation precedes you. I expect Dorrie to be well protected.”

  He wondered if Antonoff was talking about his military reputation or the one he’d acquired later. Guess it didn’t matter. All Antonoff needed to know was that Ian and Ben would do whatever it took to keep her safe.

  “Dorrie is under my protection,” Antonoff continued. “When someone threatens her, they threaten me. And I don’t take threats well. Nothing happens to her.”

  Ian bristled at the implication that Ian wouldn’t do whatever it took to make sure Dorrie was safe. “Nothing will. Ben and I are good at our jobs.”

  “I know. I also know you have a personal relationship with Dorrie, which is part of the reason I’ve hired you. She’s not comfortable with new people. For her sake, you’d better be as good as Adam says you are. I’ll deal with Adam for your fee—”

  “No. No money for this.”

  Ian thought he heard Antonoff huff out a laugh but he couldn’t be sure. “There will be money. If you don’t want to know the particulars, don’t ask Adam. You can work out the details with Dorrie. But if anyone makes a move on her, I need to know. I’ve already been briefed on last night’s abduction attempt. If it happens again, I need to know immediately. Have a good day, Mr. Keller.”

  The call cut off in his ear and Ian slowly lowered the phone and set it on the counter in front of him.

  Holy shit.

  A thousand different thoughts floated around his head but two kept surfacing.

  Dorrie was theirs to protect. And they were now working for Antonoff.

  The first made him want to beat his chest. The second… Well, that made him twitchy but he’d deal with it because…well, Dorrie was theirs.

  Did Antonoff know she’d spent last night in bed with him and Ben? And what the hell would it matter? It wasn’t like Antonoff was her father.

  “Ben!”

  Abandoning his coffee, Ian stalked out into the living room and yelled up the stairs again.

  “Ben! Where the hell are you? Get down here.”

  Seconds later, Ian heard Ben’s footsteps pounding down the steps.

  “Why the fuck are you yell—”

  “I just got off the phone with Antonoff. He hired us to guard Dorrie.”

  “Get the fuck out.”

  His cousin’s stunned expression made Ian grin. “Not kidding. He must have had someone following her last night.”

  Ben shook his head, as if trying to get his brain to function. “Damn. That means—”

  “Yeah. He knows she nearly got snatched last night.”

  “Then he also knows she spent the night here.”

  Ian shrugged. “I don’t see why who she’s sleeping with makes any difference to him.”

  Ben didn’t look convinced, though he seemed to shake it off. “No, I guess you’re right. It does mean he knew there was a threat, though.”

  “I know. We’ll figure that out later. Now, we need to call Dorrie and figure out logistics. We’ll keep her here and—”

  “Dude.” Ian heard the laughter in Ben’s voice. “She’s not a hostage.”

  Ian had the almost overwhelming urge to punch his cousin, just barely managed to keep it in check. “That’s not what I’m saying. I meant that she’ll be safer here.”

  “And if she doesn’t want to stay here?”

  Ian shook his head. “Then you’ll just have to charm her into it.”

  *

  “It’s Ian.”

  Dorrie stared at the number on her phone as it rang a second time, her finger hovering over the little green answer symbol. She and Risa had retreated to Risa’s bedroom soon after her dad had dropped the bombshell about Ian and Ben.

  They’d had a few minutes to talk but their conversation had consisted mostly of Risa saying, “Oh my god, you had sex with both of them?”

  “Aren’t you going to answer it?”

  Dorrie looked into Risa’s eyes. “Of course. I just… This is going to change everything.”

  “It doesn’t have to. You just need to assert yourself a little more. Don’t let them manage you.”

  Her mouth twisted in a grimace. “You haven’t met them. Ben can charm birds out of trees and Ian could give a Dom pointers.”

  Risa blinked. “Do you actually know what a Dom is?”

  Dorrie rolled her eyes. “Of course I know what a Dom is. I mean, I’ve never actually met one but you gave me that romance series last year about dominance and submission.”

  “I didn
’t know you’d actually read them.” Risa began to smile. “What did you think of them?”

  “You really want to discuss what I thought of a couple of books? Now?”

  Risa shrugged. “Call me curious.”

  “Nosy is more like it.”

  “Humor me. What did you think of them?”

  Her nose wrinkled. “I thought they were interesting but the lifestyle doesn’t appeal to me.”

  “But you did find something about it appealing?”

  Something in her sister’s voice made Dorrie take a closer look at Risa. “I found the story fascinating but I can’t see myself ever being put in those positions. I would never allow a man to put a collar on me and I can’t imagine enjoying being tied up.”

  “You don’t find anything…appealing about being unable to move, not even if you struggle?”

  “No…but you do, don’t you?”

  Risa looked away, as if embarrassed. Dorrie had never seen her sister embarrassed about anything.

  “Hey.” Dorrie grabbed Risa’s hand when she didn’t answer and continued to stare at the wall. “Nothing you can say will ever make me think less of you. You know that, right?”

  Risa looked back at her now, her gaze narrowed. “Do you ever just want to throw your hands in the air and say fuck it, I’m done? Just take me and tie me up and make me come until I can’t scream anymore?”

  “Honestly? No. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t want that.” Dorrie paused, waiting for Risa to say something. When she didn’t, Dorrie tugged on her hand. “Do you seriously think I would judge you for that?”

  Shaking her head, Risa squeezed Dorrie’s hand. “No. Of course not. It’s just…”

  “Just what?” Another pause. “Ris, come on. After last night, do you really think I’m going to say anything other than, if it makes you happy and doesn’t do any harm, why don’t you go for it?”

  “Because if anyone found out, it wouldn’t be me I’d be worried about.”

  “You’re talking about Blank, aren’t you?”

  A longer pause this time. “Maybe…not just Blank.”

  Dorrie didn’t think her eyes could widen any more. “What?”

  “Maybe you’re not the only one who has feelings for two men.”

  “I thought…I mean, I only knew you had feelings for Blank because you told me. You never seem interested in anyone. Are you going to tell me who?”

  Risa shook her head. “It’s never going to go anywhere. And if I say it out loud, I’ll have to deal with the fact that I’ll never have what I want.”

  Dorrie wanted to press but Risa looked heartsick, an expression she’d never seen on her sister’s face before.

  “Oh Ris—”

  “No.” Risa held up her free hand and clutched tighter at Dorrie’s with the other. “I don’t want to talk about it. At all. I can’t.”

  The pain in Risa’s voice made Dorrie’s heart hurt in sympathy but she totally understood. Still…

  “I’ve never known you to give up on something you want. It’s just not who you are.”

  “And sometimes you have to know when to give up and find another obsession.”

  Dorrie didn’t know what to say to that.

  “Now,” Risa continued. “You have a phone call to return. And I think you might be stalling.”

  Maybe. Probably. “I’m not sure having and losing them is any better than never having them.”

  Risa studied her closely. “Are your feelings for them that serious?”

  She shook her head. “It’s only been two days.”

  Her sister’s eyebrows rose. “You’ve been lusting after Ian for months.”

  “Yes, but…”

  “But what?”

  “I can’t let myself fall that hard because I’m not sure I could pick up the pieces when it all falls apart.”

  “Now you sound like me. And who says it’s going to fall apart?”

  “I can’t ever tell them who I really am. I don’t want to build a relationship on a fundamental lie. Ben and I had one date. Ian and Ben and I shared a few hours in bed together. I’m not even sure they want a repeat performance. And now Dad hired them as my guards. Maybe they think they’re getting paid to sleep with me.”

  “Whoa.” Risa held her hands up. “Now you’re just working yourself into a frenzy. Don’t. Okay? Just…stop.”

  “I can’t. I still don’t know why Ian cut me off in the first place. I don’t know what Ben sees in me. Maybe they have a thing for awkward brunettes. Maybe it’s all some elaborate joke. Maybe—”

  “Maybe you’ve gone off the deep end.” Risa’s wry tone made Dorrie suck in a deep breath. “That’s enough of that. You’re making me paranoid.”

  “Well, then, welcome to the club.”

  “Oh now stop. When did you become such a drama queen?”

  “About ten o’clock this morning when I realized there were two men waiting for me after my game and neither of them was Blank.” She looked at her watch. “Shit. I’ve got to go. I told Blank I’d release him today but I need to see him first. So now I have to call Ian and Ben to pick me up. I can’t believe they agreed to this. A few days ago, Ian didn’t want anything to do with me and now he’s going to be by my side twenty-four-seven. It makes no sense.”

  “It does if he cares about you.”

  Dorrie hadn’t let herself think about that. “I need to go. Blank’s probably climbing the walls.”

  Risa’s mouth curved. “I’m surprised he stayed as long as he did.”

  Dorrie didn’t point out that Blank’s injuries had been severe.

  Pulling up the call log, she stared at it for a few seconds before sighing.

  “Do you want me to do it?” Risa asked.

  Dorrie rolled her eyes. They both knew that wasn’t going to happen.

  “Then suck it up, buttercup.” Risa leaned back into her chair, her expression pure challenge. “Make the call.”

  “I am so going to laugh when you’re the one in this position.”

  “Oh hon.” Risa shook her head. “I am never going to be in your position. It’s just not going to happen.”

  *

  Ben pulled to a stop in front of Dorrie’s office building, not surprised when Ian had his door open before the car stopped moving.

  Ian was pissed, probably because Dorrie had called Ben—not Ian—to say she’d meet them here. One of Antonoff’s men would deliver her and wouldn’t leave until they arrived.

  “I’ll check to see if she’s upstairs.” Ian held the door open long enough to speak. “She’s not answering my texts. If she gets here before I get back, bring her in and I’ll meet you upstairs.”

  Then Ian slammed the door shut and took off before Ben had a chance to answer. When Ian was gone, Ben finally released the breath he’d been holding.

  Ian was wound tighter than a ballerina’s bun, and if his cousin didn’t chill, Ben was going to punch him. He’d gladly pay the consequences for a few minutes of peace.

  Shit, maybe this wasn’t the best idea. Maybe they were too close to her to protect her. But when he thought about anyone else guarding Dorrie, his eye started to twitch. And he knew Ian would’ve agreed no matter what Ben had decided.

  Realistically, though… Probably the worst idea ever.

  They’d slept with her last night and today they were supposed to make sure some unknown threat didn’t snatch her because he wanted leverage against the crime lord who paid her bills.

  Hell, the writers of Law & Order would’ve rejected this storyline as too unbelievable.

  Resting his hand on the steering wheel, he settled into a more comfortable position and cased the area. He didn’t expect to see anything out of the ordinary, but he knew never to make assumptions. They usually came back to bite you in the ass.

  Seconds later, a car pulled up behind him. The driver got out and went around to the passenger side, where he reached in to help Dorrie out of the backseat.

  Ben recognized the drive
r from this morning but now he saw the way Dorrie smiled at him. As if they were friends. It made his teeth clench.

  Well, damn. Look at that. Maybe he was as bad as Ian.

  Without moving, he watched Dorrie exchange a few words with the guy, who walked her into the building and disappeared. The guy returned a few seconds later.

  And headed straight for Ben’s Patriot.

  Ben waited until the guy knocked on the passenger window before he unlocked the doors so the guy could get in.

  At a few inches over six foot with the build of a runner, he didn’t immediately identify as Russian thug, even with the nose that’d been broken at least once and the faint scar on his cheek.

  And his blue eyes held an open warmth Ben hadn’t expected.

  A second later, he held out his hand. “Gennady Marcov.”

  No hint of an accent. If he hadn’t mentioned his name, Ben might not have pegged him as one of Antonoff’s men.

  He took his hand. “Ben Shaw.”

  “I understand you and Keller are taking on Dorrie until Blank’s back in shape.”

  Fuck that. It wouldn’t only be until Blank was back.

  And now who do you sound like?

  “Yeah. I take it you work for Antonoff.”

  The guy didn’t respond. Stupid question anyway. “Dorrie and I have been friends for a very long time. I would hate for anything to happen to her. If you need help, you call me.” He pulled a card out of his pants pocket and handed it over.

  Ben took it, but only to be polite. Then he smiled so the guy knew it. “Thanks. I’ll keep it handy.”

  The guy’s smile widened. “Yeah, I’m sure you will. A little advice? Anything happens to her, you better hope you get caught in the crossfire. Have a good one.”

  Marcov got out of the car, shut the door behind him then walked up the street to his car.

  Jesus, what the fuck did we get into here?

  And did it really matter?

  Ben had realized this morning that Ian loved Dorrie. The guy might never admit it but Ben knew his cousin. The way he looked at her, the way he touched her, his entire body language when he was with her. Ian loved her, no doubt in Ben’s mind.

  So where does that leave me?

  Damn good question. And one he couldn’t answer. And how about this one?