My Heart to Keep: A Maxwell Family Saga - Book Four

by Alexander, S. B.

  “Let’s take a walk,” Coach said, swiping a hand over his shiny bald head.

  The summer heat had been brutal with high humidity and a heat index that was off the charts.

  “How was camp? Coach Green tells me you were great.”

  We ambled down along the perimeter of the farm and settled near the small building Mr. Thompson used to sell Christmas trees.

  “Did he also tell you he wants me to play for him?”

  “He did. And you should consider his offer, son.”

  I angled my head. “You don’t want me playing for you?”

  He looked past me briefly. “I do. Look, Coach Green has the best connections with scouts and colleges. He even has friends in high places. Plus, the school will be good for you. You’ll do nothing but study, attend classes, and train.”

  I knew he was looking out for my best interests, yet I couldn’t help but feel a pang of hurt in my gut. “I like the school.”

  Coach Dean tucked his hands into his pants pockets, studying me. “But? What are you afraid of?”

  I squinted at the setting sun. “Leaving my mom. Quinn.”

  He gripped my shoulder. “As you should be. But think about yourself. What do you want, Maiken? I mean, look into your crystal ball. What do you see for yourself? Not for anyone else, but for you. Don’t worry about me, your mom, Quinn, or anyone. I want you to dig deep and find what’s going to make you happy.”

  My eyes burned as tears filled them. What I wanted I could never have. I wanted my dad there, having the same conversation with me that Coach and I were having. If he were there, he would be asking me the same thing.

  “I want to play for a Division I school. I want my dad to be proud of me. I want my mom to be as well. I want a family in the future. I want to play in the NBA. Most of all, I need Quinn in my life.”

  He smiled like a proud dad. “Then pour your heart and soul into the game. Through your hard work and dedication, everything else will follow—family, girlfriend, NBA.”

  “You sound so sure.”

  He chuckled as he started back toward the farm store. “You’ve been through a lot, son. It’s time you focus on you.”

  “You think Greenridge will help me do that?” My gut said yes. But I wasn’t so sure about my heart.

  “The academy will remove all the noise surrounding you and allow you to zero in on your talent. Think of it as basketball camp for an entire year.”

  The four weeks at camp was comparable to military boot camp, or I suspected as much given what Dad had explained about his time in boot camp. Regardless, a regimen-like camp for a whole year would get me in tip-top shape to play ball. Maybe then I would have several options when it came to a full ride to a Division I school.

  We stopped outside the farm store.

  “I better get inside,” Coach said.

  Mr. Thompson poked his head out. “We’re about to start.” Then he looked at me as if he knew my question. “Quinn is down in the barn or maybe feeding the pigs.”

  “Sir,” I said to Mr. Thompson. “I didn’t drink that night.” I’d been wanting to get that off my chest.

  Mr. Thompson cracked a smile. “I know, son.”

  It was weird to see him smile. I wasn’t complaining, though. “Thank you.”

  “Let me know what you decide,” Coach Dean said before he moseyed inside.

  My head spun as I headed down to the barn. Do I go? Or not?

  Go. You know you want to.

  But what if Quinn decides she doesn’t want to wait for me? Or what if some boy snags her attention this year?

  I was near the barn when her sweet and flowery voice slithered into my ears. Basketball and decisions could wait.

  “Beast, get back in your pen,” Quinn ordered the pig.

  I laughed as I watched her wrangle the fat animal into the pig pen across the way.

  She spun on her heel. “You’re home.” Then she ran like she was in the fifty-yard dash and launched herself at me.

  I caught her, steadying us so we wouldn’t fall.

  She peppered kisses on my cheeks, forehead, nose, then mouth. She lingered for a long minute on my lips. “I’ve missed you.”

  Well now, maybe I should go away more often.

  She slid down my body, the friction causing my jeans to tighten. “When did you get back? How come you didn’t call me?”

  I seated my hand on her lower back, making darn sure she didn’t move an inch, not because of my boner, but because I missed the heck out of her. I missed the feel of her against me. I missed her bright smile, her big amber eyes, and her butterscotch hair. But most of all, I missed kissing her.

  I crashed my mouth to hers and took, tasted, and devoured. She melted into me like butter on warm toast. When her tongue clashed with mine, I forgot where I was, and frankly, I didn’t care that I was standing in the middle of her farm for anyone to see.

  Her dad could pry me off her, or try, but I wasn’t letting her go, not in this minute, hour, or lifetime.

  My breathing was all over the place. My hands were in her hair, on her butt, her body, and her arms before cupping her face. “I’ve missed you terribly.”

  She whimpered before pulling me over to the side of the pig pen where no one could see, not even her mom if she was watching from the house.

  She shoved me against the building, giggling. “Let’s resume where we left off on the night of my party.”

  Holy shit!

  “Um… Your brothers?” Liam hadn’t left for college yet, and I doubted Carter had either.

  “They’re at the gun club.”

  My muscles loosened.

  She fumbled with my belt.

  “You’re not drunk?” I knew she wasn’t, but she’d never been this forward sober.

  She rolled her eyes, unzipped my jeans, and was about to slip her hands inside when I stopped her.

  Confusion filled her eyes. “What’s wrong?”

  I circled my fingers around her wrists before bringing them up to my chest. “We need to talk.” I couldn’t let her take advantage of me then tell her I was leaving.

  Beast snorted as he came around the corner of the building.

  Quinn giggled. “This pig is the bane of my existence.”

  Beast pushed his snout into my leg as though he were giving me a warning. Don’t you dare hurt my girl.

  A laugh broke out in my head at the absurdity of what I was thinking about a darn pig.

  Quinn tapped Beast on the butt. “Come on. You need to eat.”

  Beast followed her as she guided him into the pen with the other pigs.

  I was right behind them with a smile from ear to ear. It was amazing to see how animals responded to her. I still wasn’t ready to ride a horse, but I didn’t have a problem with pigs.

  Once Beast was in, Quinn locked the gate. “Where were we?”

  “Talk,” I said.

  She pouted, and that plump bottom lip jutted out. “You’re going to Greenridge, aren’t you?”

  “Honestly, up until I walked down here, I kept changing my mind. But after talking to Coach Dean…” I tugged her to me. “Please understand.”

  Tears pooled in her pretty eyes. “It hurts.”

  I caught a tear as it escaped. “I know. I need to do this. You can come up to visit me, and I’ll come home when I can. Plus, I’ll be home for the holidays. And you can throw yourself at me and do whatever you want.”

  Tears cascaded down her cheeks as she giggled. “Whatever I want, huh?”

  I bobbed my head, my groin responding.

  She slumped her shoulders. “Senior year won’t be the same. We can’t sneak into our little hideaway and steal a kiss or cop a feel.”

  My phone buzzed in my pocket. I suspected it was Mom. She wanted me to babysit my younger siblings while she got some work done. She was working on an important case.

  But when I took out my phone, Noah’s name lit up my screen.

  I raised my finger to Quinn and mouthed, “One m
inute.” Then I slid the icon on the phone to answer. “Hey, man. Can I call you back in a bit? I’m with my girl.”

  “Sure, but make sure you do. I have something I need to talk to you about.” He sounded serious.

  “Give me an hour,” I said before hanging up.

  “Who was that?”

  “A friend from camp.” I’d wanted to introduce her to Noah when she visited me at Greenridge, but Noah had a family emergency he’d needed to deal with.

  Quinn rubbed the toe of her shoe in the dirt. “When do you leave?”

  “Friday.”

  “What? Like in three days? Why so soon?”

  “Greenridge starts a week earlier than Kensington.” I held out my hand. “Come here.”

  She shook her head. “I can’t.”

  I felt as if she’d just stuck a knife in my chest. “Why not?”

  She pouted. “Because I won’t let go.”

  I wrapped my arms around her anyway. “We’ll talk on the phone. We’ll text all the time, and we can even FaceTime. You know, we might be doing just that anyway when we go to college.”

  She tensed against me. “I thought we had one more year before we went our separate ways.”

  “Maybe we’ll both get accepted to the same college,” I said, unsure of myself.

  She gave me one of her shy and sexy smiles. Man, she looked like a farm goddess. Strands of her hair were wild around her face, her nose was red, her cheeks were flushed, and her cleavage was on display in her ratty V-neck tank top. “Maybe. You know, we should have sex before you go.”

  I choked.

  She eased away. “What? You don’t want to?”

  My mouth instantly went bone dry. “Fuck yeah.”

  “So what’s with the panicked look?”

  “I get the feeling you want to have sex because I’m leaving. I don’t want to rush into it. Sex is a big step for both of us, Quinn.”

  She twisted her lips. “I know. I still have to talk to my mom about the pill anyway.”

  That was another reason she hadn’t been ready to take the plunge.

  I stepped closer to her. “So we’re good?”

  She stuck out her tongue at me, her shyness bleeding through the redness in her cheeks. “Yes.”

  I heaved a sigh, even though it was going to be excruciatingly difficult to say goodbye to her.

  My sweaty skin trapped pieces of my hair to my neck and forehead. The weather for late August was disgustingly humid. We didn’t have air conditioning, so the nights had been unbearable. Momma and I had found ourselves on the front porch, lying on one of two swings, which both had comfy cushions and pillows, hoping to catch a cool breeze on most nights, but none came. Daddy and my brothers didn’t seem to mind and slept through the heat.

  I was ready for ten feet of snow and subzero temperatures. The heat coupled with Maiken leaving for Greenridge had me irritated and antsy beyond belief.

  He’d been gone for four long days, and I couldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t sleep, and I couldn’t even eat. Celia had tried to cheer me up, but nothing was working. It hadn’t even helped when Daddy lifted my punishment.

  Things around me were changing, and I didn’t like it one bit. I’d lost my boyfriend to a private school. Liam had left for NC State the day before, and Carter was returning to Boston in a matter of minutes. Then I would be the only one at home.

  Momma had cried last night and again that morning when Liam hugged her before getting into the car with Daddy. I even cried as we waved when they drove away.

  “I’m not sure I’ll survive when you leave next year,” Momma had said. “I’m losing all my babies. The house feels empty already.”

  I rocked on the porch swing, staring out at Carter’s beat-up truck, wondering what Maiken was doing at that moment. His classes had started the day before, and he hardly had time for much with schoolwork and practice.

  The screen door creaked open. “Quinn.” Momma still sounded sad. “Why don’t you help me with dinner?”

  Blinking, I tore my gaze away from the chipped red paint of Carter’s truck and regarded Momma. “I’m not hungry.”

  She wiped her hands on her apron, giving me a pitiful look. “Have you called Maiken?”

  “We texted.” No amount of texts or phone calls would erase the pain I felt or the loneliness setting in. “Momma, what if I never see him again? What if Maiken doesn’t want to go out with me anymore? What if he finds another girlfriend there?”

  She smoothed a hand over her dark-brown hair as she sat on the edge of the swing next to me. “Oh, honey. If the love between you two is strong, then no one can break that bond, not even another girl.”

  “It hurts too much. Sometimes I can’t breathe.”

  She rubbed my leg. “He’s your first love, and those are the most painful, but they’re also very special. Why don’t you call Celia and invite her to spend the night? It will help to take your mind off Maiken.”

  Sniffling, I pulled away. “I might just take Apple out.” My horse always seemed to put me in better spirits.

  Momma curled strands of my hair behind my ear. “I think that’s a good idea.”

  Carter came out with a suitcase in one hand and his phone in the other. “I’m leaving now. See you then.”

  Momma rose. “Why so soon?” Her voice was even sadder than before.

  Carter set his suitcase down on the wooden planks of the porch. “Brianna and I want to get a head start before traffic picks up for the Cape.”

  My mom kissed Carter on the cheek then gave him a hug. “You be careful. I want you to text me that you made it safely. Understood?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  She breezed back into the house.

  “Still brooding?” Carter asked. He was decked out in shorts, flip-flops, and a Boston University T-shirt, looking tanned, relaxed, and eager to see his girl.

  I stuck him with my middle finger as a bucketload of jealousy soured my stomach. He was going to see his girlfriend and have a great time at the Cape while I was stuck at home with chores and loneliness.

  Jeez, Quinn. Pity much?

  “My advice, for what it’s worth—play the field, sis. Date. Have fun.”

  I rolled my eyes. “You don’t understand love, do you? And having fun? You saw how that went down at my party.” Plus, I couldn’t date. Maiken and I hadn’t broken up, although it felt like we had.

  Carter stalked closer before resting his butt on the railing. “I’m not saying get shit-faced. You can go to a party without getting drunk. Besides, aren’t you still set on making valedictorian?”

  I knitted my eyebrows. “Of course. What does that have to do with Maiken or having fun?”

  “Between doing my job and Liam’s on the farm and studying, you won’t have time to see any boys, let alone Maiken if he were here.”

  “You’re just a bag of fun. Not.” Although he had a point. Until Daddy hired someone to help out, it was little ole me and Daddy. Momma would help, but she had her hands full with the farm store.

  “If you need anything, Quinn, call me. You hear me? I’ll be there for you.” Sincerity threaded through every word.

  I snorted. “You’ve never been there for me before unless you were scaring away boys. So what changed? Are you looking for a reason to not go back to school?” He’d told me he was thinking of quitting.

  “Not at all. In fact, I’ve decided to give it one more year before I make my decision on whether or not to continue.”

  “My advice is to get your degree.”

  He hiked a shoulder. “I gotta run. Brianna is waiting.” He closed the distance between us and kissed me on the forehead. “Be good.”

  I laughed. “Maybe I won’t this year.”

  “It’s your funeral.” He chuckled as he headed to his truck.

  I envied my brother. I wanted to pack a bag and drive up to Greenridge.

  Carter beeped the horn and waved as he drove off.

  My phone rang beside me, and Celia’
s name lit up the screen.

  “Want to spend the night?” I rushed out. Loneliness was setting in like a bad virus, seeping into every vein, making me feel ill and sad.

  “Look out at the top of your driveway,” Celia said.

  I squealed as she drove slowly down and parked in the spot Carter had just vacated. I hung up, vaulted off the swing, and ran down the porch steps.

  Celia had barely gotten out of her car before I threw myself at her. She smelled of the beach and coconuts.

  “Were you tanning?” I asked.

  Her arms went around me. “I was earlier.”

  I held on to her like she was my lifeline. In a lot of ways, she was. I only had Celia now.

  “Quinn, you’re hurting me.” She giggled. “I’m not leaving you.”

  My body vibrated. I was on the brink of bawling for, like, the millionth time since Maiken had left.

  Celia leaned against her car, looking as pretty as ever with tanned skin, cute red-painted toes, flowers on top of her flip-flops, and her hair up in a bun. Big hoop earrings complemented the beach vibe she was exuding. “It’s time for you to stop pining over Maiken. Tessa’s having a pool party tonight. It’s her end-of-summer bash. Let’s convince your mom to let you go.”

  I scrunched my nose. “Are you kidding me? My mom will tie me up before she lets me go to another party.”

  Her button nose wrinkled. “You’re not grounded anymore. Right?”

  “My dad lifted my punishment last week. Still, I’m afraid to ask.”

  She pushed off her car. “Let’s ask your mom together. You’ll thank me later when we’re jumping in Tessa’s pool. This heat is unbearable.”

  A refreshing swim might do the trick. I chewed a nail as I followed my bestie into the house. “Mom?”

  “In the kitchen.” Mom’s voice competed with the sound of the TV in the family room.

  Celia walked in before me. “Hi, Mrs. Thompson.”

  Mom stirred a pot of spaghetti sauce. “Celia, honey. How are you?” She set the wooden spoon down on the counter.

  “I’m good. Mrs. Thompson, do you mind if Quinn accompanies me to Tessa’s pool party?”

  Mom rounded her gaze to me so fast I thought her head would spin off.

  “I won’t drink,” I quickly added. “I promise.”