Balance (The Neumarian Chronicles)

by Ciara Knight

  He massaged my thigh and we sat quiet for several moments. “We’ll make it out. I know we will.”

  “Ryder?” I took in a long breath. “We won’t. I know someone will die.”

  Ryder looked up at me. “What do you mean?”

  “My mother’s prophecy. In the beginning, there was a chance Penton was the one that would die.”

  “Yes, but he didn’t.” Ryder wrapped his arms around my waist.

  “But someone will. I just don’t know who. I assumed it was Penton because he’s the closest friend to the Triune. Mother’s been right about everything else. Well, except the part where I’m not there at the final battle.”

  Ryder stiffened. “What are you talking about?”

  I brushed his hair away from his eyes and smiled. “It’s nothing. I realized in my dream I wasn’t at the final battle, but Father said that’s because the statistics changed. Mother’s prophecy was based on the current information and all sorts of crazy statistics her Neumarian brain calculated. After her death, things changed and she wasn’t here to alter her premonition based on those changes. Father thinks I wasn’t in the dream because I was supposed to die, but since that didn’t happen, the future changed.”

  Ryder stood, pulling me up with him, his eyes wide, his chest rising and falling with vigor. “But we’re not there yet. I can’t remember our plans, not with this block in my head, but there is still a great distance to Acadia.”

  He pulled me tight against him. “This can’t be happening. I won’t lose you. I can’t. You’re the one who was destined to survive. I always thought…”

  I slid from his arms and cupped his face. “You always thought you’d be the one to die and I’d live. It’s the same for me. I would rather die so you could live.”

  Surprise filled me as unshed tears welled in his eyes. In all this time, I’d never seen him cry. The man of pure strength was melting from grief in my arms.

  He cupped the nape of my neck then froze. Turning me to face away from him, he lifted my hair. I cringed, knowing how he felt about implants.

  “Don’t do that,” he rasped.

  “What?”

  “It’s not ugly, just a beautiful extension of who you are.” His lips brushed over the implant, the most sensitive part of my body, and a zap of pleasure shot down my arms and legs. As he continued his exploration of the back of my neck, I moaned and dropped my head.

  “Does it hurt at all?” he breathed into my ear while his fingers massaged under the device.

  “No,” I sighed. “It’s just ultra-sensitive, as if it’s connected to every nerve ending in my body.”

  His lips danced feather light kisses down my neck, across the implant and up to my other ear. “If tonight is all I get, I want to know every inch of you.”

  His words ignited my body. My eyes fluttered closed as his hands caressed my skin. It wasn’t just the implant that was sensitive, it was every inch of me. Each kiss, touch, or breath sent me to another level of pleasure, the way only Ryder achieved.

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  I eased out of Ryder’s arms, my body feeling sated and relaxed. My mind—well, that was something else. Sadness at the knowledge of what was to come, the expected loss of life, and terror we would fail consumed me. Only after I’d slipped into my uniform, jammed on my boots, and secured my weapons in my holster did l lean down and brush my lips over his. “It’s time.”

  He sat up and tugged me flush to him, his mouth covering mine. “I love you.”

  “I know.” We’d gone through hell and come out stronger for it. But our love didn’t change a thing. One or both of us might be dead within the next twenty-four hours. “Promise me something,” I said, pressing a kiss to the hollow of his neck.

  “Anything.”

  “When this is over, repeat what you did last night.”

  His hands shook and I knew he didn’t want me to leave. This man, who was a born protector, had to leave the woman he loved to an unknown fate. His one consolation, he didn’t know our plans, or the extent of the danger. He not only didn’t remember our discussions and battle plans from the day before, but Father had also blocked all memory of Helvetia’s people and our base in the Highlands from Raeth and his minds.

  “With pleasure,” he choked. “Now go, before I—”

  “Change your mind and drag me off to a secret location and have your wicked way with me?”

  He gifted me with a heart-melting smile. “Absolutely.” Stepping back, he said, “Go.”

  My feet felt anchored to the floor, my heart pleading not to leave him. “Keep my image and love in the forefront of your mind.” At his forlorn expression, I had to keep from throwing myself back into his arm. “It’s important, Ryder. No matter what happens or what Mandesa tries to tell you, my husband, you have to remember me and our love.”

  “As if I could forget. Now, go.”

  Stifling a sob, I nodded and rushed from the room. As I approached the rally point, I spotted Bendar, not McCormick. A second later, Father exited an office and pulled me into a hug. McCormick’s going with his troops. Take Bendar with you. The shuttle’s fueled and waiting. He pulled away, his expression as heartbreaking as Ryder’s. How do I let you go?

  Remind yourself it’s for the greater good. Through our connection, I felt the war raging within him at my leaving and our insane plan. I suspected the only reason he didn’t throw me in the brig in an attempt to keep me safe was Penton stepping in front of him.

  General, I have one request.

  What’s that, son?

  If I do make it out of this, Raeth and I’d like you to marry us.

  Father nodded. Count on it.

  Standing on my tiptoes, I smacked the back of Penton’s head. Dumbass, you should’ve married her last night.

  Raeth glided to us with a determined gait. I agree. You refused to marry me because you’re worried you’ll die and for some reason you think if we aren’t married it won’t devastate me. For a genius, you’re sometimes as dumb as a bucket of cogs and wheels. You own my heart and soul, Penton. That means we’re already married. So understand this, husband, if you die, I’ll kill you.

  Um, Raeth? If I’m dead, you can’t kill me.

  Then I’ll find you and make your afterlife hell. She grabbed the front of his uniform and yanked his face down to hers, planting one hell of a kiss on his lips. When she released him and stalked off, he would’ve toppled over if Father hadn’t propped him up against the wall.

  Dang, that’s some girl you’ve got there, Father chuckled.

  “Yes. Yes, she is,” Penton murmured.

  I recommend you survive, I suggested.

  Grinning, he pulled his gaze from Raeth as she disappeared down a side corridor. Right. Otherwise, she might find a way to bring me back just to kill me if I don’t.

  I’m sure of it. I looped my arm through his as we followed Father and Bendar.

  Bendar elbowed Father. Unfortunately, given his height, he connected with Father’s leg mid-thigh. Never such forward woman before.

  I blame Mandesa, Father said.

  At my snort, they paused and stared at me with identical arched eyebrows. Men. When they weren’t being patronizing, they assumed no responsibility for female outrage. Who are you men going to blame after we defeat Mandesa? Us?

  Naturally, they answered simultaneously.

  Penton and I were still chuckling as we exited the building and slinked down an alley to the east docking bay.

  As we got closer, I took in the bombed out structure. Where’s the shuttle? I asked Father.

  You can only get there by an underground train. Bendar knows the way. Once you get back to the base, take my winged experiment as we discussed.

  I know, Dad. Land near the desert and the refugees will hide it. From there, I make contact with those providing the disruption, and ensure we have a shot at making it out of this alive.

  Correct. The Artereses’ shuttle lands at first light. The underground city’s provide
d transportation. Be in position by then.

  What about you? When do you arrive?

  After Raeth and Ryder. Want to throw-off the general and Mandesa. You’ll receive intel via a messenger in Acadia. Mags. She’s in the position, awaiting contact.

  Mags? The corners of my lips tugged into a smile. How I longed to see that crazy old lady again.

  I thought you’d be pleased. Father winked. Remember to release your attack as Mandesa’s ships rise. Between your force, the rebellion’s, and the sleeper third wing, we should neutralize most of her military. What we don’t, Penton’s gas will.

  I nodded. I’ll make you proud, Dad.

  You already do. Now go, before someone sees you.

  Bendar hobbled to the stairway and led Penton and I down two flights of stairs to a track with a small rail car. More of a platform with an engine.

  With our mental connection severed, no one spoke, communicating only through body language and gestures. Bendar handed us each a pair of googles. We put them on and boarded the flatbed.

  Penton sat cross-legged, bracing himself between the engine and Bendar on a seat bolted to the wooden slat floor. I wedged in on the other side of Penton and held on, praying it wouldn’t be as rough as the old gunrunning car we’d taken in Middle Europe.

  The engine sputtered to life, shaking the floorboards. It rocked, sputtered then finally the car rolled slowly forward. An old man with a cane went faster.

  Bendar glanced back. “Ha, not like before.”

  We both relaxed, stood, and clutched the back of Bendar’s seat. “We could make faster time walking,” I muttered.

  “Yes, but rats big. One big as me.” Bendar shook his arms, rolled his spine left and right then opened the throttle.

  Gradually, we picked up speed, but not enough to warrant hanging on for dear life. I shivered as we chugged into a dark, dank tunnel.

  “Any undead down here?” Penton asked.

  Damn him. Why’d he have to mention the undead?

  “Nope, jus’ rats.”

  Bendar’s comment didn’t instill any confidence. I narrowed my gaze, squinting at a crunching noise a few meters away. “I wonder why I don’t find that comforting.”

  As the car crawled along, the rats out racing us, I thought about finally reuniting with Mags. If anyone could help win this war, it was that feisty old woman with her big guns. I felt confident our plan was solid. We had trusted, seasoned troops. We had intel pouring in from people who went unnoticed. And we had the element of surprise with my attack force. Nothing could stop us.

  An hour later, we rolled into a bay, lights flickering on without command. Slick, clean walls surrounded us.

  “Use secret launch often,” Bendar mumbled.

  “For once, we managed to make it from one place to another without incident,” I said with a grin.

  Penton nodded, but remained quiet. He offered his hand to help me down from the platform then helped Bendar, and we followed him to a hatch. “You think I’m wrong for not marrying her, don’t you, Semara?”

  “Yes. You only have today. None of us know if we’ll have tomorrow. Even if there wasn’t a war, life is unpredictable. Over the past year, I learned to grab happiness when and where I can.”

  Bendar keyed in a code, spun the wheel, and opened the hatch into a small, four man sea and air shuttle. “Raeth right. Semara right. You stupid,” the small man said, glancing up at Penton.

  “Bendar,” I said, trying but failing to hold back my laughter as Penton stared at him stunned.

  “He asked,” Bendar muttered, waddling to the co-pilot’s seat.

  Sliding into the pilot’s chair, I scanned the controls then reached for the ignition button.

  Bendar grasped my hand. “Best not. Use float.” He pointed out the back window.

  I located two ships. They were small and insignificant, but that didn’t mean they weren’t a threat to us. “Spy ships?”

  He nodded. “They’ve been traveling up and down the coast all night.”

  “So, Mandesa will know the moment our underwater support launches. I’m sure it’s the same for the air, too.”

  Penton cleared his throat. “I’m worried we’re making a mistake. The Triune should’ve remained together.”

  “I’ve thought the same thing. It didn’t matter if they took all three of us out together or just one. It’s the same either way, the Triune would no longer exist. But this time’s different. Mandesa expects Ryder and Raeth to come to her. They’ll be inside with protection and able to help once we attack. That leaves each of us free to handle our part.” Keeping my gaze on the front window, I waited for some larger fish to swim near the shuttle then disengaged the docking clamps and floated away with them. “And if I know Mandesa, which I do, she thinks because she’s got two of us, we can’t take her down. She’s wrong.”

  “No perfect plan, only do best can.” Bendar patted my shoulder. “You born to do this. You make…Mother proud.” He choked on his words. “I protect you entire life, not stop now.”

  “Mother would be proud of you, too, Bendar.”

  He smiled and leaned back in his seat. “In middle of channel, we surface and fly to new plane. Rest now.”

  Anxiety and trepidation gnawed at me. “I doubt we can. We can’t get our minds to stop working.” Sighing, I squeezed Bendar’s shoulder. It was now or never. I needed to know why. “Mandesa was my mother’s sister. But how could two children raised together be so different? Isn’t there any good in her, Bendar?”

  He shook his head. “No. She want Father. Jealous of Mother. Turns to hate and loses rest of mind. Attack happen, she lose beauty. Now, outside match inside. Ugly.”

  “From what my dreams have shown me and what little Father’s said, she’s been insane since childhood. Her biological parents broke her before she was adopted. Or maybe she was born that way.”

  “Both,” Bendar mumbled.

  Slowly, we bobbed to the surface, riding the current for almost an hour before I turned on the viewfinder and sonar. “Nothing in sight.” I engaged the engines and rose high enough out of the water to skim the surface before turning inland and streaking toward our base.

  Chapter Thirty

  Right on time, we entered the city through the sewer system. I hated sewers. The smell was enough to bring me to my knees. Our masks couldn’t filter out the stench, just the dangerous gases.

  “Sewer close to contact?” Bendar asked.

  “I hope,” I muttered. “Seriously, Penton? Why the sewers?”

  “We’ll get there soon. And I chose this way because everything dumps into a central waste system and there’re service tunnels that branch out from it. We’re coming up on the one we’ll take.”

  “How’d you learn about the service tunnels?”

  “I used them to travel home from the city when I’d steal food for family and friends”

  I glanced at him. “You’re lucky you still have both hands. Guess you didn’t ever get caught.”

  “I did. Once.” Penton rubbed his left wrist. “A guard had me tied down. He’d lifted his sword to amputate my hand, but a council woman stopped him. Stated that she had a special plan to use me to teach others not to steal.”

  “What did she do?” I asked.

  “Gave me food and water and then sent me home. The next day, a boy’s body was strung up high in the square, burned to a crisp.”

  Nausea reared its vile head. “Who was she?”

  Penton inhaled harshly. “Rolanda.” He shook his head, his expression one of self-loathing. “The instant I heard about it, I stormed into her house, making all kinds of accusations. But once I learned the truth, I felt ashamed. I still do every time I remember that day.”

  “What about the boy?”

  “He was a young slave who’d died clearing mines from the old field.”

  Relief filled me. Rolanda had taken so many risks for the cause, including helping Raeth, Ryder and I escape Acadia East. “It’s a miracle Mandesa ha
sn’t discovered her duplicity.”

  Penton nodded. “She’s a true supporter of the Triune and honors her son by helping the rebellion.”

  “Her son?”

  “He was a doctor. He devoted himself to helping refugees and the underground city. He was killed by a drunk guard who didn’t know Karl was a member of a council family and didn’t like his response to an order to stay out of the camp.”

  My stomach clinched. “If Mandesa wins and we survive, we’ll have to take Rolanda with us. Because the queen won’t stop until she’s destroyed everyone who’s ever helped us. And given Rolanda’s loss, she’ll top the extermination list.”

  Penton shot me a warning look. “We’ve got more urgent things to worry about right now. The queen flushes the sewers at least once every hour. And from the smell, I’d say it should flood any minute.”

  “Flood?” I squeaked.

  “Yeah. Acadia’s right off the Atlantic. Guess where she gets the water.”

  Bendar pushed me from behind. “Hear water. Go. Go, Go!”

  “Move it,” I shouted, sprinting the fifteen meters to the service tunnel Penton indicated.

  Once inside, we stripped off our waterproof waders and tossed them back into the sewer. As we shut and sealed the door, sea water roared past us. “Finally.” I removed my mask. Big mistake. My nose and lungs instantly burned. Gagging, I bent over and vomited. Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand, I quickly resettled my mask. “That’s wretched. I thought the flooding would clean it out.”

  “Doesn’t,” Penton said with a shrug. “Nothing gets rid of that smell. Can’t believe I ever got used to it, either. I used the tunnels like people do sidewalks. I’d scurry through them like a rat.”

  “Without a mask?”

  “Who had a mask?” He huffed. “Not me.”

  Bendar patted his arm. “Come far, kid.”

  “Not far enough.” Penton motioned us into the next section. After several hundred meters, he took us up a service stairwell then Penton pointed to a door. “That’s our exit. It opens in an alley down from Rolanda’s house. Be ready for anything.”