Past Lives

by Kirsten Bij't Vuur

  'John says they didn't come yet, what could have kept them? You can take him through the portal, can't you? He'll be back to godhood, and heal himself?'

  That was a good idea, and they sped to the cellar, where John was still waiting, head through the portal.

  'You go through, Paul, and take him from that side, I'll lift him from here,'

  John said.

  'But time moves differently over there, I may come back too late to be with Melissa when she gets the baby. I hope she'll forgive me.' And Paul started to hand Lukas' still form to John, who thought the better of it and said:

  'You are right, I'll go with him. Hand him to me, and pray for me, please. In Hermes' house with him and his sister on the way.'

  Chapter 30

  And with that, John was through the portal in a second, his hands coming back in to take Lukas' legs. Paul let his most beloved friend disappear into the portal without him, kept on this side by his duties to his wife, but that didn't stop him from sticking his head through to see what was happening.

  He saw both Lukas and John sitting on the mosaic floor dazedly, the power of their worshippers filling them to the brim.

  Paul cried out in relief, and Lukas looked at him, face still ravaged, but in less pain already, blisters receding. He held on to John, who was in some kind of trouble, folding on to himself.

  At that moment, Hermes arrived, and seeing his son in a terrible state, a thin figure that he felt to be Dionysus bent over next to him, and he totally misread the situation and readied a full load of power to hit him with.

  Paul cried out again: 'No, Hermes, he's saving Lukas, but something is happening to him!'

  Fortunately, Hermes understood, and let the power go, bending over the two new arrivals.

  Lukas managed to talk to his father, and Paul could see his beloved trying to help John, but without luck.

  'Stuff him back in here!' he yelled, certain Hera had played some trick upon the poor guy, waiting for him to come through the portal without permission.

  Hermes did what Paul asked, and Paul hoped silently that bringing him back would stop whatever was happening to him.

  Catching his small friend in his arms, and pulling him through the portal, Paul laid his still body on the bare floor, where Melissa bent over it, and urged Paul: 'Leave him to me, see to Lukas.'

  Paul did so, and was just in time to see Aphrodite arrive. She bent over Lukas with an expression of shock and intense love, then took him in her arms gently and lighted up. She cradled him and kissed him, until Hermes walked to her and talked to her. Then he came back to the portal and said: 'He will be all right. Why didn't you come through, and what in the name of hell

  was Dionysus doing here, fully loaded?'

  John. Lukas was fine, but John might be dying. Paul cried out: 'I'll explain later, we need Aphrodite, right now, through the portal.'

  He pulled back and saw his fears confirmed, Melissa was crying now, holding John's still form in her arms, shaking her head at him.

  'I have no idea what she did to him, he's still alive, but totally out of reach, I dare not follow him without anchor, his mind is vast, I'd get lost.'

  Putting a hand on her shoulder, Paul said: 'I'm with you, go get him back.'

  With a solid link to the now, Melissa dared touch John's mind, and she found herself alone in a vast emptiness. She could feel Paul's mind on her own, and looked around her with sight, a method that had proven effective in the past.

  She saw a tiny light far below her, and imagined herself in Hermes' arms once more, speeding towards it, faster than anything on this world. Within a heartbeat, she had caught up with it. It was indeed John's being, but he was fleeing from something.

  As she caught up with him, she recognized it, and whilst it was horrible to her, it must be the worst thing ever to John, and she knew for certain now that Hera was the one who sent it to him, for she had been the one to remove it from the original owner.

  They were Rhoda's memories, of her torture at the hands of Ishtar and her minions, beyond sickening, beyond imagination, her torture of Paul, nearly as sickening, but worse to Melissa because she had never know how bad it had been, though Lukas had. The burning out of Rhoda's Gift by Aphrodite, later to be proven unjustly. And for all of this, John was taking full responsibility, letting himself be taken to the depths of oblivion, curling up in acceptance of the guilt. He was willing himself to death, he could not bear this load, and he was slowly pulling Melissa in with him.

  Melissa denied it, denied his feelings that all of this was his fault, and his fault alone. He had not tortured the girl, he had not laid a hand on Paul, and he had not burned out his niece's Gift.

  He had been the catalyst, but the evil had come from another. His sin was weakness, not evil.

  She was a good talker, but her strength was limited, this was Lukas'

  speciality, not hers. She faltered, and Paul was moving to pull her out, afraid for her life, though she did not want to give up on the friend who had become

  dear to them, who had taken his guilt upon himself and tried to face it as well as he could. He was now losing the battle, and Hera was getting her revenge for nothing worse than his existence.

  Paul was about to pull Melissa out, afraid to lose her to the despair in John's mind, when he felt a familiar touch on his mind. Lukas, and he was strong once more. Soon, a hand on his shoulder followed the touch on his mind, and whilst he stayed behind and anchored, Lukas sped to aid Melissa.

  And after him, Hermes followed, not using Paul's anchor at all, and Aphrodite, also secure in her own power. But they were not gods on this world, why did they keep forgetting that?

  Paul flung a warning to Lukas, who caught Aphrodite's essence, just as Paul caught Hermes'.

  The three of them quickly caught up with Melissa and John, and against their reasoning and combined power, Hera's phantom could not win.

  The vast minds of Hermes and Aphrodite saw through the situation at once, and with a few kind words they convinced John to not resist being taken back to the tiny cellar in Victorian London.

  Holding on to John, they let Paul take them to the now.

  It was a tight fit in the cellar, but the first thing Paul did was check Melissa, who had born the brunt of the vicious attack on John, and who was evidently exhausted beyond the physical. She would have a raging case of reaction-sickness in a minute, and who knows what that might do to their baby.

  Paul was wondering if he could manage to carry her up the stairs, when Hermes picked her up tenderly, and easily lifted her up those narrow, dangerous steps. Paul did not regret being slower, he was strong but he couldn't compete with a god. This was safer for her.

  Lukas was on his feet, supporting John, and Aphrodite was doing something to the portal, lighting up brightly. They were up the stairs last, and Paul lost no time filling a pot with hot water and the mixture from the red jar.

  Frances had allowed Melissa to take it recently, so he guessed it was safe for a pregnant woman.

  Hermes had placed Melissa on the sofa, and was kneeling beside her, stroking her hair, watching her with concern. But that was not what she wanted, too often had she come back to the wrong person: 'Where is Paul? I want Paul!' she said, and he was with her in an instant.

  'I was getting you some tea, my love, I'm here now,' he said in a voice choked with feeling. It was him she called for after all. Hermes made room for him, and Paul sat by her side, checked her power supply and found it depleted, so he topped it off and poured her tea.

  Now Lukas wanted to be with her as well, and of course Melissa wanted to know how he was, this had all started with him getting sorely wounded after all. He looked reasonably well, the skin of his face and arms was a deep pink instead of its usual shade, and Melissa could see he was in some pain, but his face looked as cute as always, he would not be mutilated by extensive burning, which he would have been if they hadn't gotten him through the portal and to his aunt in time.

  Melissa s
at up, feeling a little less tired, and hugged the two of them all in one, kissing in relief that all had ended well. Or had it? For there was still John, who had risked his life for Lukas, who might not be all right.

  'John?' she asked, and they all turned their heads towards where he sat in one of the chairs, still totally confused at what had happened, a sorry sight but awake and aware. Aphrodite and Hermes were sitting in the other chairs, waiting patiently for an explanation, not forcing anyone to talk just yet.

  They did eye the guy in the chair strangely, for they would not have recognized him if they had relied on their eyes alone. Dionysus had not only changed his name, he was totally changed, no longer fat but very small and rather lean, and his face, framed by longish brown hair, was gaunt and quite apprehensive in the presence of his half-siblings, who had taken his magic and left him on this world.

  As he heard Melissa call out his name, he replied: 'I'm fine, love, you got to me just in time. It was a trap, placed there by Hera, she must have set it to permanently seek for me. She knows where I am now, she may follow us here.'

  That thought clearly caused him fear, but Aphrodite said: 'Don't worry, Dionysus, I've sealed the portal against her, we'll set that situation to rights when we return.

  But first I want to know what happened here, how did Lukas get into such a state, is he in danger?'

  Lukas sat on her lap and kissed her lovingly, to thank her for her healing touch, and to soothe her, saying: 'I'm not in danger, beloved, it was a stupid accident that could have killed Paul and me both, but fortunately didn't. I owe my continuing good looks to John, I guess. That is the name Dionysus uses

  these days.'

  'What happened at the site?' Melissa wanted to know. She looked much better, the tea had revived her, and she was holding Paul possessively. To think she might have lost both him and Lukas was just gruesome.

  'That huge iron boiler, remember it? It was cracked, and had no gauge and no safety-valve,' Paul told her, 'I was trying to see whether it could be salvaged, when it collapsed and sprayed Lukas with boiling water. I was spared because I was standing on a ladder.

  John rushed to the portal to get Aphrodite, whilst I revived Lukas to get him to heal himself out of danger, then I took him home. I didn't dare enter the portal for fear of getting back too late for the birth, I couldn't just leave you, so John went, and nearly died for his trouble.

  Thank you so much, John, for risking all.'

  John looked rather forlorn, lost in the memories that had been pushed upon him by Hera's spell. He realized now that the others were right, that not all the responsibility was his, but still he felt very guilty and sickened at the detail of what had happened.

  Paul caught John looking at him, and beckoned him to come closer. He knew the man had had a terrific shock, and took him in his arms. 'You're thinking of what was done to me, you saw all the gory detail. It was a terrible ordeal, John, and I hope the one who was truly responsible got her due, but I have forgiven you and I want you to let Lukas take those memories from you or detach yourself from them if you can.

  There is no gain in living in the past, it is time for you to let the past go.

  You have a right to be happy again, and if your old world denies you that, we will help you get it here.'

  Hermes looked at Aphrodite, who nodded at him, and Hermes said: 'I apologize for following Lykos into your mind, John. I was afraid to lose my friends, and took steps to retrieve them.

  I saw a lot of your memories, and I wonder, why didn't father ever tell me we were half-brothers? Why didn't you?'

  'I didn't dare tell you, since father hadn't. I thought he was ashamed of me, didn't care about me, he left me to be hunted by his spouse for years.

  Being denied my heritage may have caused me to act as I did. Or maybe it didn't. I know I was weak.'

  John was as hard on himself as always, and Paul felt a real urge to soothe

  him, make him see he was worth loving.

  'I also saw everything that happened to you here. George warned me against it, I didn't listen to him. I'm very sorry about what we put you through, though I know you do not even blame us for having nearly killed you.'

  John observed: 'I know you meant well, you truly thought you were giving me a second chance, and eventually I did get it. I don't think I would have changed if your plans had worked out, I needed to really suffer to become a better man.'

  Hermes nodded, and said: 'That is the final thing we saw, you really have changed, and therefore our sister and me have decided to speak up for you to our father, and plead him to reinstate you as the god Dionysus. I notice you have already gotten your powers back, how did you manage that?'

  John did look glad to hear that was to be reinstated, but he seemed totally unable to picture himself as Dionysus anymore. He had truly become John, a man leading a small, uncomplicated life with friends, and plants, and love.

  He answered Hermes' question first: 'When Lukas had found me by accident, days away from death, he took me to see Frances' greenhouse, and we met George. He recognized me immediately and felt really bad for having lost track of me. To make up for what I had been through, he wanted to return my magic, and with Melissa's help they managed.'

  The look Hermes gave Melissa was one of disappointment, and he asked, with judgement in his face and tone: 'You and George removed a punishment I had put on someone for the crimes he committed against the people you love most of all?'

  Pregnant or not, Melissa's eyes shot fire, and she retorted: 'You made a big mistake, Hermes, ignoring George's advice. You dumped a helpless man in the middle of London in winter, with nothing to live on, to be chilled to the bone for months, beaten, raped and finally to die of hunger and lack of love.

  You should have seen John as Lukas found him, days away from death, skin over bone, afraid of his own shadow. And still he thought he deserved that treatment. He only wanted to have his magic back to feel safe again, and to help Frances save the coffee-plants she had raised.

  Wait until you see George, he loves you, you know that, but you were wrong and you'd better admit it. I'm glad we gave John his magic back, it was the right thing to do, and in a few years we will be drinking Frances' coffee every day.'

  Hermes clearly didn't expect her to attack him, and he looked positively crestfallen: 'So George is mad at me, too? I'll have some making up to do.'

  That seemed to cheer him up, and he said: 'I am impressed he managed to do it, I thought it was devilishly clever of me how I had constructed that spell.'

  'You didn't just will it to be, then?' Melissa asked, anger forgotten.

  'No, I have learned some things from you people, I thought I had done quite a nice job. But George beat me at my own game.'

  'Actually, father,' Lukas said proudly, 'Melissa did. She saw through it, Tristan did the subtle work, and Paul the reconstruction. It was a beautiful project.'

  'Are you still angry at me, Melissa?' Hermes asked with an irresistible grin, 'if I admit I was wrong? Can I have a kiss? You are more beautiful than ever.'

  He got up and kneeled before her, his beautiful face gazing up at her in supplication.

  She could not resist that gesture, took him by his jaws firmly and kissed him deeply. His expression was one of pure bliss, and he did not say a word for a full minute afterwards.

  Then he asked: 'May I touch your beautiful belly, feel my grandchild move beneath my hands?'

  She nodded, and said graciously: 'You may, I'm curious what our baby will think of you.'

  And as he laid his hands on her large belly, the baby did react instantly, finding Hermes' hands to move against.

  Hermes was delighted, and spoke, clearly to the baby: 'If you come soon, I will be here to meet you.'

  Then he hugged Paul in greeting, and his son, and finally he asked:

  'Despite everything, will you give your brother a hug, John?'

  And the smaller man smiled and put his arms around his brother tightly, for the first time in
centuries.

  'Will you come back to your own world?' Hermes asked him.

  John looked torn, and replied: 'I don't know yet, Hermes. I have often dreamed of living on a vineyard with Hailee, raising a brood of children, but I don't feel like Dionysus anymore. She might not even recognize me like this, maybe she'll find me repulsive.

  And I like being safe, I always felt hunted with Hera out for my blood, and I felt threatened by you as well, especially with Lukas about to come into

  his own. I realized he'd get his Gift one day, and a strong one, it was the same with me.

  I love him, I know I cannot claim him, but I don't want to be a world away from him either.'

  Melissa thought it was time for some drinks and some food, so she ruffled Hermes' hair and got up, and went into the kitchen to make coffee and tea.

  Lukas came after her to help, but first he held out his arms to her, saying:

  'Come to me love, I know you must have felt fear, seeing me like that, and nearly losing John.'

  She fell into his arms and let herself be comforted, then checked his eyes for signs of pain. 'It does hurt, beloved, but not as much as the thought of leaving you two behind. Can I sit in your lap later, to deal with my own shock?'

  'Please do, Lukas, I want you close to me. Can you take care of the coffee and tea, I don't feel so good standing up, I need to sit down.'

  As she came back into the living-room, John and Hermes were back into their chairs, and Paul got up and helped her to the sofa: 'I'm sorry, love, I should have taken care of that. Let me help Lukas, you sit down.'

  Glad to be back on the sofa, Melissa guessed Paul and Lukas would do some private hugging, too, and they did stay in the kitchen rather a long time.

  Aphrodite decided to taste coffee for the first time, and she really liked it.

  John had learned to appreciate the taste, even their own cheap brand, so Melissa was the only one drinking tea.

  'Could we grow this in Greece, John?' the goddess asked, the name almost naturally fitting this new incarnation of the tubby god she had disliked intensely.

  A bit apprehensive at being spoken to by the powerful goddess, having felt her disapproval at his constant state of intoxication and his pathos as long as he could remember, he only had to find the nerve to speak to her, for of course he had spent a lot of time on answering that question to himself, and he had long since decided he would like to try to grow it in his vineyard it if he ever returned. So he replied: 'I'm quite certain I could, even the special variety Frances imports. The bushes require a lot of heat, which we have plenty of, and they take a long time to grow, but we're trying to speed up their growth with magic and it seems to be working.'