Chapter Thirty-eight
Austin stepped away from Laney and got in the truck without a word. He backed away, waving, and left the lot before I spoke. "Have a good morning?"
My teeth clenched so tight, I might crack a tooth. I didn't try to touch her yet. I wasn't sure I could think straight if I did. And we needed to talk.
"It was fine. Have you eaten? We didn't get lunch, so I'm starved."
I shook my head no and offered her my hand. She looked at it for a second too long, so I withdrew my hand, feeling a bit rejected. I swallowed down the lump in my throat and stuffed my hands in my pockets.
"Japanese okay?" I asked. When she nodded, we walked toward the Japanese restaurant across from the arcade.
I asked for a regular table. I loved hibachi. But it's loud and not at all private. Once we were seated, I sighed. "We still have today together. Austin should give me extra time since he keeps getting between us."
"I don't want to drag this out any longer. I don't want the two of you fighting over me. Damn, you almost dislocated my shoulder yanking on me yesterday!"
"I apologized for that already. Do you want me on my knees groveling? What more can I say beyond I'm sorry. It won't happen again. I never meant to hurt you." I buried my face in my hands. Fuck. I sounded like some abusive asshole just making excuses. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt Laney. I swallowed down a big lump in my throat. When I spoke again, my voice was low. "I knew I'd screw this up."
"I'm not trying to rub your nose in your mistake. But it can never happen again. You can't grab me and yank me around like that. Ever."
I looked up then, my emotions a mess. "It won't."
"Well, alright then."
We ate quietly. I paid. When I reached for her hand, this time she let me take it. I unlocked the Jeep and turned her into my arms. "I thought I'd show you where I spend a lot of time when I'm here in Free Will." My lips were on hers before she could ask where that was or protest my actions. A wolf-whistle from someone across the parking lot kept me from deepening the kiss. "You make me forget where I am, Laney. A man could get lost in your kisses and never even mind."
I pointed the Jeep north and we drove to the outskirts of town. I pulled into an empty gravel lot to park. "I never understood why more people didn't come up here. But for someone who always liked having a lot of solitary time, I've been grateful that Free Will chose to ignore this place."
Spring's always been my favorite season with all the blooming plants, the chirps of baby birds, temperatures warming up. It was a wonderful day to be out enjoying nature. We headed down a partially washed out path.
Laney slid down a little embankment, straight into me.
"If you want to be in my arms that bad, all you have to do is ask. You don't have to tackle me," I murmured. I laid on the ground beneath her, but I was fine with how we landed.
Chapter Thirty-nine
One of his hands slid under my T-shirt to caress my back. The roughness of his hands sent shivers up my spine. The dappled light filtering through the canopy of spring leaves flickered as the wind blew, almost like candlelight. The firm muscles of his chest beneath my hands felt like home. I bent my head down toward his, and he rose up to meet me. Our lips met in a gentle brush at first, before deepening into a slow and sensual dance. Not urgent, not even sexual at that moment, but intimate all the same. This kiss was raw, emotional.
I loved this.
I loved him. It was not just lust. I was in love with Jake. He was the one I have dreamed of finding. The salt to my pepper, the Papaw to my Granny.
The thought flickered through my mind to tell him he was my only choice, but the passion in his kiss swept it away. I should tell him that I'd been his from that first kiss, that he'd ruined me for all others. But I clung to him and savored his taste. I enjoyed the sensation of his lips on mine.
He broke the kiss and I nuzzled my face into his chest. I concentrated on holding back a sob. It's not even been two weeks. Was it even possible to fall in love that fast? I'd never believed so before. But, what else could this be? The utter bliss when his lips meet mine, the euphoric rush I got when his hand brushed against me, could only be love. If he didn't return my feelings, this love left me vulnerable.
Jake not wanting me would hurt so much more than when Austin cheated. If Granny's plan didn't work, if he didn't care about me enough to fight, my heart would break. My breath caught in my throat and I swiped at my eyes to keep the tears from falling.
"Hey, are you crying? Did you hurt yourself when we fell?" Jake rolled us so that I was on my back, with him leaning over me. The concern in his eyes was too much. I sobbed, and laughed, shaking my head no, all at the same time. His look of concern morphed into one of confusion. I'm sure he thought I was crazy.
He tried again, "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, just a realization that took me by surprise, that's all." Was I ready to tell him I love him? He hadn't said it yet. Yeah, he seemed upset when he thought I might pick Austin, but the word love had never been mentioned. Not love, not falling in love, nothing of the like. His friends had said it, but they could just be teasing him. I couldn't trust that as absolute truth.
What if I said it, and he laughed? No, he wouldn't laugh. Jake was seriously in to me. I knew that. It's the strength of his commitment I was unsure of.
He tugged a lock of my hair, grinning at me. When our eyes met, he looked straight to my soul. "What's that? Did you realize that my brother is an idiot, and you can't live without me?"
"Something like that," I whispered.
He kissed me again. "Good, I would hate to think we weren't on the same page. I'm crazy about you, Laney."
Crazy about me? Well, it's not an admission of love, but I'd take it.
Extracting his limbs from mine, Jake stood and dusted himself off. He helped me up off the ground, and we continued down the path toward who knows what. He'd never said where he's taking me. The path split, and he followed the path to the right. The narrow path wasn't wide enough for us to walk side by side, so I fell in behind him. Couldn't say that I minded, the view from back here was damn yummy.
Those jeans he wore, I needed to find him a dozen more pair. I wondered if I could convince his boss that Jake could only wear these jeans from now on. Because, oh my goodness, did they make his ass look fine!
"The path will widen up here in a sec," he called back over his shoulder.
"It's fine if it doesn't, I'm loving the view."
He jerked to a stop and spun to look at me. The smile on his face made me glad I voiced that thought aloud. "Yeah?" he finally asked.
"Oh yeah. I'm buying stock in whatever company makes those jeans."
He snorted before turning back down the path. By the time we reach the widened part of the path, I was smack dab in the middle of a luscious daydream that involved getting him out of those jeans. The blush on my face when he turned around gave me away. The self-confident grin made me even hotter for him.
I couldn't tell you which of us moved, but we came together. Our lips pressed together, bodies close, and passion overtook us. His tongue danced against mine, and everything around us disappeared. He was my entire world in that moment.
Ragged breathing drowned out the chirping birds. Jake moaned against my lips, and his hands slid down me. Grasping my behind in his hands, he lifted me up against him. On tiptoe, I pressed as close to him as I can. Lust lapped at me like a flame, and I burned for him.
He pulled back, his voice hoarse as he told me there was somewhere a bit more private a few minutes from here. Grabbing my hand, he almost drug me down the path. Unsteady legs carried me along with him.
I felt naughty for even thinking about what I hoped would happen when we found that privacy. I'd always been the good girl, always following the rules. But today, given the chance, I was going to be bad. And I planned to be good at it.
We came up to a small lake, more of a pond really. A walkway with a covered bridge crossed over the stream of wat
er feeding into the lake. He tugged me toward the walkway. That bridge must be what he had in mind.
When we got up on the bridge, he let go of my hand and rushed into the interior of the bridge. The light coming through disappeared, and I called out in concern.
"Just latching the door."
"They latch?" Oh, please let me have heard that right!
He nodded and yanked me up against him. "Come inside, so I can latch this one. Won't stop anyone real determined, but at least we'll hear them if they try to get in."
I moved inside and allowed him to pull the doors closed. Wood rubbing against wood seemed erotic. Darkness crowded the small space, tiny bursts of light peeking through here and there. The inky blackness of the interior completely engulfed Jake's face, but his hands grasp my hips.
Lifting me into his arms, he pressed me up against the wall of the bridge. His breathing quickened, and we were so close that it's as if he pulled the air straight from my lungs. Arms around his neck, I brought our lips together. The minty taste of his gum invaded my mouth, along with his tongue. Spearmint would forever be a reminder of this moment.
I wriggled until I could pull my shirt free. His hands didn't fumble when he unfastened my bra or when he boosted me higher and took my nipple in his mouth. The scratch of the wood against my back became a delicious contrast to the soft, gentle touch of his lips.
I urged him to be rougher. I begged for more. He obliged. When he sat me down to take off his shirt, I stripped. My pants were off and I was undoing his by the time his shirt hit the floor.
There was no doubt in his mind that I wanted this—there couldn't be. My hands slid inside those fantastic jeans and shoved them ruthlessly from his hips. I dropped to my knees in front of him and helped him free his legs from his pants. When I kissed my way up his leg, he groaned my name.
When I took him into my mouth, he cried out. The salty taste of his skin aroused me even more. Moisture dripped from me. Jake tangled his fist in my hair and tugged me upright. Once I regained my feet, he murmured, "You are driving me crazy."
Good, now he knew how I felt all week.
He bent down and rummaged around for his pants. Pulling his wallet out, he got us protected.
Words were no longer necessary. Pleas for more, gasps of pleasure devolved into grunts and moans as he shoved me against the wall and thrust into me. It only took a few delicious motions of his hips to push me over the edge. My nails scratched his back when I clung to him, riding the waves of my orgasm. His movements became erratic. When he reached his peak, he growled out what I swear was "I love you."
He held me, still pressed against the rough oak wall while we regained our breath, his forehead a sweaty weight upon mine. "Damn, Laney," was all he could get out. His legs quivered as he struggled to stand there.
Maybe I should have protested and kept things from going this far today. But damn it, if this was my last day with Jake, so be it. I would savor each moment, each kiss, each embrace.
I buried my face in his neck and inhaled deeply. I tried to memorize the scent of his skin. I don't think he understood the power he held over me. If he rejected me tomorrow, I might shatter and be nothing more than memories blowing like leaves in the spring breeze.
He leaned away from me and dug around looking for something. His phone lit up and we used it as a flashlight to redress by. Silence surrounded us. After he dressed, Jake moved to unlatch the doors.
"I bet we aren't the only ones to have that idea," he said, a wide grin on his face. He pulled me into his arms again, "You okay with maybe hanging out here for a while? Alone time sounds good."
My nod of agreement earned me a tight hug. There were a few benches surrounding the pond. Jake led me over to one. He flopped down on it and drug me on top of him. He held me close with one arm, the other flung up over his eyes.
"Have you made your decision yet?" he choked out his question without looking at me.
I had, but I wanted to be sure it's the right one.
When I answered, I kept my answer neutral, "Not entirely. I'm still on the fence." His muscles hardened with tension beneath me. Was it cruel to do this? To not tell him he would be my choice, if I knew he wanted more than a fling. My resolve nearly broke at his sigh. That helpless exhale of breath made my heart ache.
"I shouldn't ask, but are you leaning my way at least?"
"I..."
Voices and laughter carried over the breeze to us, stalling our conversation. A group of hikers came down the path toward us. I sat up and wondered if my appearance screamed 'Jake just fucked the shit out of me in that covered bridge over there.'
He reached up and smoothed my hair some, so I must have. "You ready to head back?"
Hell no, but we should. Time was moving too fast. This could be it—my last moments with Jake. Oh, to slow the ticking clock, even for a moment. Since I hadn't developed magical abilities in the last few hours, I nodded to him and we started back toward the trail.
He called a generic greeting to the other hikers, but led me by without engaging them in conversation. "You want me to lead again? Or you remember the way?"
"You go first. Maybe I want to stare at your ass in those jeans a little longer." No maybe about it. His sexy grin, and the mischievous glint in his eyes, sent waves of desire crashing over me once more. Eyes darkening, nostrils flaring, Jake picked up on it. I was in his arms, his lips on mine, before I could blink. On tiptoe, I wriggled close to him, my hand clamping down on the back of his neck, pulling his head closer to mine. A whistle from across the clearing brought us back to reality. He ended the kiss and I buried my face in his chest in embarrassed laughter. He released me with a chuckle, and started up the narrow path.
Between that kiss, and the delicious jean-clad ass in front of me, it's surprising I could form coherent thoughts when we got back to the Jeep. A missed call from my mom, and a worried text, awaited my attention.
Mom: Are we going to see you this visit? You ok? Granny said you're upset.
"I need to spend some time with my parents. They haven't really seen me yet. Would you mind?"
He sighed, and I knew he had hoped we could be alone. But he said it was fine and smiled at me, a sad, little smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. The silence in the car became almost unbearable. My guilt nearly overwhelmed me when I allowed myself to contemplate what this was doing to him.
Chapter Forty
Jake took a sharp turn into the high school parking lot. Coming to an abrupt stop, he slammed the Jeep into park. Hand tangling in my hair, he drug me toward him. His lips crashed into mine. The console between us dug into my side, but it didn't keep me from leaning as close to him as I could. When we broke apart, we both gasped for air.
He rested his forehead against mine. "I don't want to lose this. I want more. I'm not ready to give you up, Laney. Please," he whispered.
My heart pounded against the cage of my ribs, threatening to break free and fly away. Was he about to tell me how he really felt? Was I going to find out what I need to know without having to force it?
He released me and threw the car into gear without another word.
What the hell? That's it? My wishful heart excited too easily. Jake wasn't about to spout off a confession of love. Nope. Just saying he wanted more isn't love. It could still be entirely about the mind-blowing sex.
I needed to know that it's more than sex between us.
We pulled up at Free Will Bridal and he walked in holding my hand. My parents invited him to join us for dinner after they closed up, but he declined. What? I'd thought he was going to spend tonight with me.
"You need some time to make your choice." He shook his head and gave a disbelieving sort of laugh. "And, God help me, I'm going to do my damnedest to accept it. I've told you I want more. But I can't decide for you."
He leaned in close enough I could see the flecks of gold in his eyes, the single freckle next to his left nostril. I inhaled sharply when his hot breath rushed over my cheek. His mouth
settled over mine and moved in gentle, addictive motions. When he traced his tongue along my upper lip, I melted. His strong arms held me tight to his chest, supporting me since my knees refused. He deepened the kiss, his tongue twirling around mine.
A needy moan reached my ears, and I realized too late it came from me. My arms came up to wrap around his neck, and I shifted trying to satisfy the ache within me. His taste intoxicated me. He pulled me in like a moth to a flame and I couldn't get enough. I would never get enough.
My dad cleared his throat and called, "That's enough." I considered patricide for the first time in my life. Didn't he understand this could be our last kiss?
At my dad's words, Jake softened the kiss. It became, not a kiss of passion, but one of reluctant farewell. He released his grip on me and whispered in my ear, "Goodbye, love. It's up to you now if this goes any further." He then turned and walked out the door.
"Well, that was, uh, interesting to see," my mom said. I raised an eyebrow at her, interesting how? She continued, "I don't recall seeing Austin kiss you with such intensity."
"That would be because he didn't. Ever," I replied. It's true. Austin had never kissed me with such passion, such intensity. Not even when we were intimate...
"You made up your mind yet?" Dad asked. I glanced over at him, and the little smirk on his face had me rolling my eyes.
"I don't know. What if I pick Jake and find out he only wants, you know... sex? That's what I'm worried about, Daddy." Saying the word sex in a sentence to my dad—so freaking awkward.
"He came to the hospital to visit your sick Granny after only a week. Darling, I am positive he wants more than physical satisfaction." Mom's matter-of-fact opinion made sense. I felt a bit more positive that tomorrow would go as I hoped. When my dad voiced a similar opinion, I couldn't help but smile.
We made it through dinner without any further embarrassing conversations. My parents both seemed to get that I didn't want to discuss Jake and Austin, so they kept the conversation away from them and told me about the new spring lines, how they were searching for a new part-timer for the boutique, and the typical small town gossip.
Free Pass (Free Will Book 1) Page 14
