Mrs. Invisible

by Christina Hagmann

  “Really?” Emma asked, studying her face in the mirror. She gave a little shake of her head. “Next outfit,” she said abruptly as she ran back into the closet to change.

  “Uh, Mrs. Stevens?” Jackie called into the closet. “I think you might be running late.”

  “Jackie, it has been so long since I went out with my friends, but I know this, they are all perpetually late. They are so used to making men and women wait for them, they would not know what it is like to have children waiting for them. I used to be that way too. But when you have a kid screaming to leave, you tend to be on time.” Emma peered out the closet door. “Unless they have to use the bathroom.”

  “I like that one,” Jackie said, smiling. Emma had put on a sparkly black form-fitting top that complimented her figure. Instead of a dress or a skirt, Emma chose a dark rinse jean that accentuated her hips.

  “You think?” she asked, spinning in the mirror. She finished the outfit off with some strappy stilettos, walking across the room, pretending to air kiss and wave at people. Jackie giggled at her.

  “Geez, I don’t think I’ll be able to wear these shoes all night.” She looked in disappointment at her feet as she took a few steps. “Ouch.”

  “You have to, Mrs. Stevens!” Jackie gushed. “The outfit is perfect! Your friends will be so jealous.” She gave a devious grin.

  “Well, I don’t want my friends to be jealous.” Emma looked in the mirror and spun around again. “Who am I kidding? Yes, I do.” Emma leaned down and grabbed Jackie’s hand, and they broke out in laughter.

  After putting the finishing touches on her outfit Emma walked Jackie to the door.

  They stood in the foyer, the younger girl turning to Emma. “Make sure you go out and have a good time. You spend so much time trying to be the best mother. You deserve this.” Jackie leaned in and gave her a quick hug before pulling the door shut behind her.

  Emma smiled halfheartedly at the door. It was true. That was one thing about her. She always wanted to be the best. The best daughter. The best at school. The best wife, and then the best mother. Maybe that was where she lost herself. Who determined what was best?

  Emma went back through the house and entered the garage. She climbed behind the wheel of her Lexus and opened the garage door. She sat there, taking deep breaths.

  She looked at herself in the mirror. She didn’t normally wear eyeliner so even though she had just put on a little; it was very obvious to her. Tugging at the satin material of her top, she felt like a kid playing dress-up. What was wrong with her? She used to be fearless and now she was nervous about going out for drinks with some of her oldest friends.

  “Come on Emma, you can do it,” she whispered to herself in the rearview mirror. “You’re not an old lady yet.” She put her doubts out of her mind and left the comfort of her home.

  After cranking her music and singing the entire trip to her friend’s house, she was in a lighter mood. Jane lived in a sprawling Tuscan style villa in the hills of Dream City. Much more luxurious than Emma’s cute Cape Cod style home. But Jane always loved the finer things.

  The house was lit up and there were already vehicles in the driveway. Her heels clicked up the stone walkway as she made her way up the arched front door of Jane’s house.

  Not sure if she should knock or just walk in, the decision was made for her when the door opened and her friend, Charla, stood before her.

  “Oh, wow, Emma!” Charla squealed, thrusting herself forward to scoop Emma up in a big hug. “You look amazing.”

  “Hey, Charla.” Emma answered. Taking a step back once she released her. “You look amazing too.”

  Charla screamed back into the house. “Hey, Jane! Look who’s here!” Charla called out in her deep Tennessee accent that Emma always found charming despite the harsh words that often came out of Charla’s mouth.

  “Emma!” Jane screamed, coming around the corner. She stopped dead in her tracks. “Wow, you look great!” Emma felt the red rise flush from her neck to her cheeks. “Come in! Come in!” Jane waved her arms frantically. “I’ve got some hors d’oeuvres and cocktails ready to go in the kitchen.”

  “Oh, god, Jane. I think the word snacks better describes your little cheese and sausage tray. Hors d'oeuvres. What kind of fancy mumbo jumbo?” Charla rolled her eyes as her voice trailed off.

  “Get off my back, Charla, “Jane said with a smile. “Anyway, ladies, we have one hour until our ride shows up. Let’s get our drinks on!” Jane pulled the ladies into the house and down the hallway to the kitchen.

  Up tempo instrumental music flowed through the bright space as Emma let her shoulders relax a bit. Every surface was bare and immaculate. It was like a fancy hotel, but Jane didn’t do the cleaning, she had a cleaning lady for that.

  From the first time Emma met Jane, Jane knew she didn’t want kids, but she was an amazing “aunt” to Liam. That being said, Jane had a taste for the finer things in life, and she could afford it.

  Denise was waiting at the high-top glass table. “Hey, Emma!” Denise called, getting up to give Emma a one-armed hug. Denise was the quiet one of the group, but she followed big mouthed Charla around, and she said enough for the two of them.

  After greeting each other, the women joined Denise at the table. They fell into the easy flow of conversation, catching up on the events of the past five years like no time had gone by. They talked about family, jobs, and Emma tried not to say too much, but much to her dismay, the talk turned to Trevor. She hated when they talked science stuff, but it was understandable, considering that was how they all met.

  “So, Emma, I heard about Trevor’s new project, totally trippy, right?” Charla wagged her eyebrows at Emma.

  “I haven’t heard.” Emma looked down at her plate, picking at the food Jane placed in front of her.

  Charla nearly choked on her champagne. “Wait, Trevor really doesn’t tell you?” Even though Emma knew Charla meant nothing by it, her words felt pointed.

  Emma took a sip of her drink before speaking. “He takes the confidentiality agreement he signs seriously.” Plus, Emma knew she’d just be jealous if she heard what Trevor was working on. It stung to know that Charla, who was also in the nano field, would know more about what Trevor was doing than Emma would. Emma felt her cheeks flush and the mood in the room dulled.

  “God Charla, fail to be a big-mouthed bitch.” Jane shoved Charla off the stool and turned to Emma. “Don’t worry, babe. You have bigger things to think about than what your husband is doing.” Jane reached out and squeezed Emma’s hand while shooting Charla a dubious look.

  Charla shrugged and mouthed “what?”

  After that, the conversation turned toward lighter topics: Jane’s latest conquests, Denise’s ever-growing brood of children, Charla’s constant flirting with anyone who wasn’t her wife. Time passed so quickly when the four of them were together.

  When Jane finally stood and announced their ride was there, Emma felt a little bubbly with the couple of drinks she’d had. They all retreated to the foyer and grabbed their coats; Charla carried her drink with her.

  “You’re not taking that with you, are you?” Denise raised her eyebrows at Charla.

  “Damn straight. I’m not wasting a perfectly acceptable drink.” Charla tipped back another gulp of her martini.

  “Are we ready for a night to remember?” Jane called. The girls laughed as they walked out the front door to the limo awaiting, their heels clicking on the stone.

  “If it goes right, I won’t remember a thing!” Charla’s words were followed by a peal of laughter.

  That was when Emma noticed the limo. “What is that?” She nearly choked.

  “Oh, no one told you?” Charla giggled, the waves of her drink threatening to crest over the rim of her glass.

  “Oh my gosh, I’m so embarrassed!” Emma called out, her face turning red. “A limo?” The rest of the ladies laughed in delight. They all knew Emma never enjoyed ostentatious displays. They pushed Emma down the sid
ewalk and into the night.

  There were more drinks waiting in the limo as Emma tried to help herself to some water. “Uh, uh, Hun.” Charla waggled a finger at her. “You will let loose tonight.”

  Emma sighed and accepted the glass offered to her. “Is anyone going to tell me where we’re going?”

  “Driver, can you crank the music up?” Charla lifted her chin, calling to the driver who nodded at them. She turned back to Emma. “What was that, dear?”

  “I asked where we are going.” Emma rolled her eyes. The music grew louder as Emma asked the question again.

  Jane raised her hand. “Me! Me! Call on me!” She bounced in her seat, her ample breasts threatening to spill out of her low-cut top.

  Charla pointed at Jane, “Yes, dear? You in the back?”

  Jane straightened her dress as though preparing to give a speech. “Um, Mrs. Stevens, we’re only going to the newest, sexiest club.” She paused, attempting to build suspense before shouting, “Club Indigo!”

  Charla stomped her feet and squealed, while Denise’s jaw dropped.

  Emma gave them a blank look. They all stared at her, waiting for a reaction.

  Finally, Emma spoke. “Um, what’s Club Indigo?” She sipped her drink and cringed. It was almost all alcohol.

  “You damn nut!” Charla called. “I've even heard of this place, and I don’t even live here.”

  Denise added. “It’s only the coolest place in like any city. There are always celebrities popping in.” Denise turned to Charla. “Maybe we’ll see someone famous.” She grinned.

  “One can only hope.” Charla tipped her head back and finished her drink in one gulp.

  It was a forty minute drive to the downtown club. The girls chattered the whole way there while Jane and Charla snapped selfies and group photos to post on Instagram. The conversation stayed light as they reminisced about some of their wild nights out in college.

  In no time, they pulled up to a notoriously exclusive club. Jane got out first and weaved through the crowd to the doorman. The rest of the girls followed and arrived in time to hear Jane’s whispered conversation with the doorman, who let them right in.

  Jane looked back as Emma raised her eyebrows at her friend. “What?” Jane shrugged. “I know people.” She grabbed Emma by the arm and broke out in giggles as the four women sauntered through the dimly lit entryway. Emma noticed her friends light up with the pulse and activity of nightlife. Emma didn’t share their enthusiasm. She fidgeted with her top, pulling it back up over her chest.

  Chapter 4 Club Indigo

  Charla found a table with a clear view of most of the club, but after being seated for a moment, she bounced back up and called out over the heavy beat of the bass. “Let’s hit the dance floor!” Charla grabbed Denise by the arm and they both turned to look at the group expectantly.

  Behind Charla, Emma watched the Northern Lights swirl above the crowd in an array of blues, greens, and purples. Music pumped from some mysterious place and the bodies on the floor fused together in fluid motion.

  Emma swallowed. The air felt thin, as though she wouldn’t be able to catch her breath. Her vision grew fuzzy around the edges as her knees weakened.

  When Jane saw the look on her face, she moved over to Emma’s side.

  “We’ll sit this one out,” Jane called and waved the rest of the girls off. Jane steered her friend over to a high-top table and pulled out the chair. “Emma, you look a little pale. Why don’t you have a seat?”

  Emma perched on the cushioned stool. “Do I look that bad?” She brought her hand to her chest.

  “No, no, honey. You just looked like you might pass out.” Jane shot her a sincere smile as Emma surveyed the room. There were many young girls dressed in little to nothing. It relieved Emma that her bit of cleavage didn’t hold a candle to the body parts that some of these other girls were showing.

  “Come on Emma, aren’t you having fun?” Jane asked, reaching for Emma’s forearm that rested on the glossy black table.

  “Yeah, it’s great,” Emma answered, smiling.

  “That wasn’t convincing.” Jane put a hand on her hip, cocking it forward.

  “I know,” Emma glanced around the room and then down at herself. “Is it weird that I feel old?”

  “Yes!” Jane shouted, spitting out her drink. “I mean, it doesn’t help that you have a husband who is a decade older than you, but you are a year younger than me and I’m not old!” Jane swiveled her head, shooting daggers at all the young girls around her.

  Emma gave Jane a pathetic smile. “No, you’re not. But I’m a mom,” Emma said, shrugging hopelessly, “and I’m married. And I don’t get out much, not like this.” She motioned to the groups of smiling faces and shiny white teeth around them.

  Jane stood. “That’s all the more reason for you to get out and have a good time. You work harder than all of us.” Jane waved at the rest of their friends, who were shaking their booties on the dance floor.

  “Oh, you girls work hard. You all have glamorous jobs and I’m stuck at home cleaning the toilets.” Emma looked at her fingernails. She’d gotten a manicure for this big night out. It seemed silly now.

  The music slowed and Charla and Denise rushed back to the table to take a sip from their drinks.

  “Emma,” Jane said, leaning forward and looking serious for once. “You have just as much responsibility as the rest of us and more than some. You are responsible for a life and for raising that little boy. You are an amazing mother.”

  Charla leaned over. “What are you guys talking about?” She lifted her martini glass to her mouth and took a sip.

  Jane answered. “Oh, just how amazing it is that Emma is raising Liam and letting her husband be a brilliant scientist.” Jane beamed at Emma, but Emma’s eyes darted to Charla.

  Charla raised a brow. “But...” Charla started before snapping her mouth shut. Jane shot Charla a look that flashed red warning signs.

  “But what?” Emma asked. Sitting forward in her chair.

  Charla put her drink down and shrugged. “I mean, you used to be such a feminist.” Denise looked to the dance floor, trying to avoid being involved in the conversation.

  “Charla, do you know what a feminist is?” Jane interrupted. “It means you have the same opportunities that men do, not that you have to prove yourself in some way. You don’t have to be a ball busting lesbian.” Jane pointed her drink at Charla.

  “Oh, piss off, Jane. I just think it’s unfair that Emma, one of the smartest people I know, let her career take a back seat over Trevor’s career. Because of a kid?” Charla glanced at Emma. “No offense, Emma, but I have a kid and it hasn’t stopped me.” She crossed her arms.

  Emma looked down at her hands that folded into each other. She knew that was what it looked like. She wasn’t even made at Charla for voicing the words.

  Jane continued. “Not everyone can find little Susie Homemaker to take care of them, Charla.” The music grew loud and fast, and Denise shuffled from foot to foot. People crowded to the dance floor once more.

  “Jane, my wife is successful in her own right. She has her own blog and her own line of organic baby food.” Charla turned to Emma. “That’s it, you should start a blog.” Charla clapped her hands together.

  Jane wasn’t budging. “She’s a scientist, not a blogger.”

  Charla stood and rolled her eyes at Jane. “Well, right now she’s neither of those things.”

  Emma bit her lip. It was harsh, but she was only saying what Emma herself had been thinking. It was the reason she sent Liam away. It was the reason she’d given Trevor the ultimatum. She needed more, and if Trevor wasn’t going to respect that, she’d needed to respect herself enough to demand it.

  Jane slammed her glass down on the table top, making barely a noise in the crowded club. “Charla, can you say one thing without putting your foot in your mouth? Damn. Come on, Emma, let’s go get drinks.” Jane glared at Charla as she got up and grabbed Emma by the arm.

&nbs
p; Emma got up and let Jane steer her toward the bar and away from their friends.

  “Thanks, Jane.” Emma reached out and gripped her friend’s arm. “I appreciate you doing this for me. I feel better already.”

  “I’m sorry about Charla. She has no tact.” Jane was now yelling as they made their way through the glistening gyrating bodies populating the dance floor.

  Emma pulled her friend to a stop. She nearly yelled in her friend’s ear. “No, I wasn’t being sarcastic. I mean it. I know I sometimes shut you out, even when I have nothing going on. You always bring me back to the real world.”

  Jane tilted her head and leaned into Emma, wrapping her in a tight hug. When she released her, she yelled over the pumping bass of a rap song.

  “Oh, silly girl. I’m not doing this for you! I mean, you’re a blast to hang out with, don’t get me wrong, but also, as an extremely hot married woman, you attract a particular amount of attention from gorgeous guys.” Jane motioned over her shoulder where a group of guys sat in a nearby booth. One nodded at them and shot them a smile. Jane waggled her fingers back and spoke out of the corner of her mouth. “I figure that when they find out you’re taken, I’ll help them get through the devastation.”

  Emma playfully smacked Jane. “Jane, you have no problem picking up guys.” Emma reached in Jane’s purse and grabbed her cell phone out. Jane twirled too slowly and took a swipe at Emma as she backed away, bumping into a girl who was dancing nearby.

  “Sorry!” Emma called, laughing as she turned back to Jane.

  “Hey, give that back!” Jane called as Emma turned it on and held it out of reach with both hands.

  Emma squinted as she entered the correct passcode. Giving her friend a knowing look, she quickly paged through to Jane’s contact list. “Aaron, Adam, Ben, Frank, Hank, James, Jim.” She giggled as Jane snatched the phone back.

  “So what? I have a lot of guy friends.” She stuffed her cell phone back into her purse, and put her hand on her hip while raising an eyebrow.