Chapter Four
Ali felt the blood drain from her face. Her legs suddenly went weak, and she had to sit down. Sinking into the chair beside the bed, she struggled to compose herself.
“Get married…?”
Jake Hawkins was proposing marriage? To her?
“I didn’t think the idea of marrying me was so offensive,” Jake began. “I know I got pretty banged up in the accident—”
“No, Jake,” Ali interrupted. “It isn’t that. It’s just…” Her gaze locked on his mesmerizing bedroom eyes, and her pulse started to race. He could be scarred from head to toe, and she would think he was the most handsome man she’d ever seen. “You caught me off guard,” she managed to say. “I had no idea this was the reason you called me here tonight.”
Jake grabbed hold of the metal bar over his head, and struggled to sit up straighter. “It makes sense.”
None of this was making any sense. She laughed nervously, not wanting even to think about marrying this man. That had been yesterday’s dream. “Maybe to you.”
He raised a hand. “Just listen to me for a minute.”
She folded her arms defensively.
“Now that I’m back, everyone will know I’m Joanie’s father. The gossip would eventually die down if you and I married. I want to be around and help raise Joanie. You could even quit work and stay home.”
Quit work. Stay home. Jake hadn’t said anything about love. Ali shook her head. Of course not. Jake didn’t love her. He’d never loved her. The only reason he was even considering this crazy idea was that she was the mother of his child. And what kind of marriage would that be?
Angry, she stood and strode over to the window. From her vantage point on the fourth floor, Ali concentrated on the brightly lit parking lot below, counting the cars lined up side by side. After a moment, she drew a breath and released it, then turned around and walked back to the bed.
“Don’t you think the people in this town are going to gossip no matter what we do?” she asked.
Jake’s jaw clenched. “Ali, I don’t want my daughter to grow up with the stigma of being illegitimate.” His voice held authority. “I want my daughter to have my name. She should be Joanie Hawkins. The only way to make it right is for us to get married.”
“Will you stop calling her your daughter?” she shouted. “Joanie is ours.”
He glared at her. “You’re the one who forgot that fact.”
Jake’s words pierced her heart, but she knew he was right. And she had no business hollering at him. The man was recovering from a serious accident. “I’ll have your name put on Joanie’s birth certificate.”
“It’s not enough,” he argued. “I want my daughter to have a full-time father.”
What Jake said was true, but she couldn’t marry him. It wouldn’t last. Not when he didn’t love her. Not when he loved Darcie. And Ali refused to be second.
“I believe it’s best if we think this over before rushing into anything. You have a long recuperation ahead of you, Jake. And there’s the surgery on your leg.”
Jake reached for Ali’s hand and drew her closer, making her sit beside him on the bed. A warmth shot through her as her gaze met his bare chest adorned with only strips of white bandage. She glanced lower, fairly certain that he was naked under the sheet that covered his body.
“What are you afraid of, Ali?” His tone held a hint of sarcasm. “Or are you waiting to see if I’ll be able to walk before you give me an answer.”
She gasped, then her shock turned to anger. “You have no right to say that to me, Jake Hawkins. I was the one here, by your bedside, trying to bring you back. I never once turned away from your injuries. How dare you accuse me of thinking…” She stopped, fighting tears. No, she wasn’t going to cry. “I better go.” Grabbing her coat and purse, she ignored Jake’s plea to stop and rushed out of the room.
“Ali, wait. Come back.” Jake cursed as excruciating pain shot up his elevated leg. He grabbed his left thigh and threw his head back against the pillow, waiting for the throbbing to stop, knowing he deserved the agony for what he’d said to Ali.
About five minutes later, Margo Wells came into the room. He remembered the nurse as being Ali’s good friend from school.
“How about a painkiller to help you sleep?” she offered, holding out the small paper cup.
“No, thanks.” He didn’t want to dull his senses.
“Okay, but sleep will do you good. If you’re worried about drifting back into a coma, the pills can’t—”
“I told you, I don’t want any medicine,” he said abruptly. “It’s my pain, I’ll handle it.”
Margo shrugged as if she were used to handling mulish patients. “Fine. If you need anything later, just ring the nurses’ station and someone will bring you the pills.” The petite nurse walked to the door.
Jake called to her, “You’re leaving?”
Margo glanced at her watch. “My shift’s over in about an hour.”
“Could you do me a favor?”
Margo’s eyes narrowed.
“Could you go and see if Ali is okay? When she left here, she was a little upset.” Jake couldn’t help but remember the pained look in Ali’s emerald eyes. He also couldn’t forget how his body reacted when she’d been so close to him on the bed.
He turned his attention back to Margo. “As you can see,” he said, spreading his arms, “I can’t go after her.”
“Jake Hawkins, you can’t even go to the bathroom without help,” she chided.
“Okay, you made your point.”
They both smiled.
“Look, Margo. I’m sorry. It’s just so frustrating lying here.” Hell, he’d spent six years in the army with rigorous training and had never been injured. This helpless feeling was driving him nuts. He didn’t even want to think about never regaining the full use of his leg. What the hell would he do? And what about his memory? The day of the accident was a total blank. He rubbed his thigh. What business did he have asking Ali to marry him? he thought grimly.
Margo folded her arms over her chest. “Jake, you should count your blessings that you’re alive.”
“Yeah, I know.” He’d blown it. “So you’ll stop by and see if Ali is okay?”
Margo nodded.
“And give my daughter a kiss for me?”
She rolled her eyes. “You are such a charmer, Jake Hawkins.”
“Then will you put in a good word for me with both my girls?”
“I’m not Jake Hawkins’s…anything,” Ali told her friend as she laid Joanie down on the dressing table and worked to get her daughter’s kicking feet into her pajamas.
“If you could have seen the look on his face, Ali,” Margo said. “He was panicked. He still can’t remember anything about the accident.”
“And that’s a good reason for me to accept his proposal?”
Margo’s eyes widened. “Jake asked you to marry him?”
Ali refused to look at her friend. Margo knew too much about her feelings for Jake. Instead she blew a raspberry on her daughter’s stomach. “It was just because of Joanie. I told him no, of course.”
“Couldn’t you at least say you’d think about it?”
Ali finished snapping her daughter’s pajamas. “What’s to think about? It’s a sad state of affairs when my first marriage proposal is from a man who’s been out of a coma less than forty-eight hours.”
“Ali, you’ve never even made love to another man. Could that be because you’ve been in love with Jake Hawkins since you were fourteen?”
“Not anymore,” she denied adamantly. “I grew up a lot this past year. I stopped believing in fairy tales. Besides, Jake only proposed because he’s afraid he’ll never see his daughter. I’ve assured him that he can see her anytime he wants.” Ali carried Joanie to her crib and placed a kiss on her cheek.
Margo followed, adding a kiss to Joanie’s other cheek. “So you’re not even going to think about his proposal?”
“There was no proposal, Margo,”
she said in a whisper. “It was a spur-of-the-moment…insane idea on Jake’s part. He looked shocked even as he said it.” Ali watched as Joanie rolled onto her stomach, snuggled under the blanket and closed her eyes.
Flicking off the lights in the small pink nursery, Ali led Margo down the hall toward the stairs.
Her friend sighed. “But wouldn’t it be a dream come true if you two were married?”
Ali stopped and glared at the woman. “Wasn’t it you who cursed Jake for leaving me? And during every labor pain you threatened to call his father to ask where you could locate Jake.”
“Well, he’s here now,” Margo assured her. “And you should take advantage of it.”
“Margo, he’s in the hospital. I think I’ll give him a few weeks before I ask him to baby-sit, or hand him a bill for back child support.”
Margo smacked Ali on the arm. “That’s not what I meant. I meant that if Jake Hawkins wants to marry you, I don’t think you should dismiss the idea.”
Ali started to protest, but Margo raised her hand. “Just think about it. He’s Joanie’s father and wants to be a part of his daughter’s life. He’s good-looking and—” her friend wiggled her eyebrows “—I hear he’s incredible in bed.”
Ali’s face flamed. How could she have ever told her friend that? “Like I have a wealth of experience in that department.”
“You don’t need any experience to know what you like.”
Ali could never forget her and Jake’s night together, but she needed more than memories. “But I do need love, Margo,” she said sadly. “And I have a daughter to think about. If things go wrong between Jake and me, our daughter will suffer. Darcie and I lived through that with our parents. Darcie…”
They both paused at the head of the stairs. Margo finally spoke. “Stop with the guilt, will you? Your sister was the one who left Jake. She has no claim on him.”
Ali knew that wasn’t true. Darcie would always have a claim on Jake’s heart.
Jake had to relent and took a painkiller to stop the throbbing in his leg. But the pill hadn’t eased his headache, or the anxiety about Ali.
Why hadn’t she been to visit him the past two days? And what about Joanie? He needed to see his daughter, to get to know her.
The door to his room opened, and his father came in.
Cliff Hawkins looked tired today. The lines around his eyes were more noticeable. There was a sadness in his father’s expression that was completely different from the usual arrogant look that Cliff Hawkins had. Jake still didn’t trust him, though. He braced himself for the barrage of questions, or worse, the argument that always ended most of their meetings.
“How are you feeling today, son?” Cliff smiled. “You remembering anything?”
“No.” Jake raised the bed. “But I’d like to know what they’re going to do about my leg. If I’m going to have surgery, I’ll need to be moved to a military hospital.”
“No!” his father protested. “You’ll get better care here. I’ve called in a specialist from Chicago. He’s flying in this afternoon.”
Jake was surprised. “I can’t afford a specialist. Besides, the army has their own surgeons.”
“I’m paying for it,” Cliff said. “I want to make sure you’re walking around again. You have a daughter to keep up with now.”
Jake didn’t know how to handle his father’s concern. This man’s motives seemed totally selfless. “Well, whoever does the operation, I want it over with soon.” He sighed, remembering the phone call he’d made to his commanding officer that morning, informing the soldier of his medical condition. Jake wasn’t even sure of the status of his leg. Until he was, he’d been given extended medical leave.
“Dr. Hostler will be here around three. He’s one of the best orthopedic surgeons in the country.”
“Only the best for Cliff Hawkins’s son,” Jake remarked sarcastically.
Cliff stiffened. “Son, I’ve always tried to do the best for you.”
“Sure. After you’re finished with Hawk Industries. Winning bids, filling contracts and making computer components were always your top priority. Mom and I always had to take a back seat to the plant.”
“Damn it, Jake. Why do you keep dredging this up? I had to make a living. If I hadn’t gone after those bids, the people in this town would have suffered. Other factories across the country were shutting down because they didn’t have work. Hawk’s employed a few hundred people who needed jobs.”
It had always been the same argument with his father. They would never agree on what was important. But Jake knew if Cliff had put his family first, his mother might be alive today. Carol Hawkins’s loneliness had driven her to the bottle…and eventually to her death. Jake vowed he would never let his own daughter go through what he had. Joanie was going to know that her father loved her. Somehow. Some way.
“Dad, do you think you can arrange it so that Ali can be here this afternoon?”
Cliff pursed his lips. “I don’t see how it will hurt.”
“Then you’ll call her?”
His father looked at him with confusion.
“She’s a little angry with me. I think it would be best if I apologize. I also need to see Joanie.” He looked directly at his father. “You think the doctor can be persuaded to let her visit me again?”
A slow smile crossed Cliff’s face. “Wouldn’t mind seeing the little one myself. But you should contact Ali yourself.” His father’s dark eyes lit up. “Maybe a small bouquet of flowers to get her attention.”
“I think for what I did,” Jake said, “I’ll need a big bouquet.”
When Ali returned from her lunch break, she found a huge vase of yellow roses on her desk. Now she knew why the deputies had been grinning when she walked through the door.
With a trembling hand, she dug out the card and began to read.
Ali,
I’m sorry for being a jerk. Forgive me. Would you please come by the hospital? I miss you.
Jake.
Ali sank down into her chair, as if the strength had been sapped from her legs. She knew she had been purposely avoiding Jake the past few days, but she wanted to let him know he couldn’t just have her whenever he snapped his fingers.
Ali had always been the true-blue twin, the one whom everyone could count on. Well, she wasn’t going to let Jake get away with treating her as he had. Of course, he wasn’t going to go away. The fact was, he was going to be a permanent influence in her and Joanie’s lives. And Ali had to figure out a way to work through their problems.
“Hey, it sure smells good in here.”
Ali turned to find Ray Benson in the doorway.
“That guy must be nuts over you to send roses in November.”
“Maybe he’s just plain nuts,” Ali said unable to meet the sheriff’s eyes.
Ray walked into the small glass-enclosed cubicle and took the seat across from Ali’s desk. “I would think flowers would put a bigger smile on your face.”
Ali loved Ray Benson, as did half the town of Webster. He had fought in Vietnam and came home a war hero. He had been a good friend of her grandfather, and a big help to Gran June when her husband died. Ray had also given Ali a job when she needed one. He’d even let her off work when Joanie had gotten sick, and never questioned her when she asked for extra time off to spend at the hospital with Jake.
“The roses come with strings,” she confessed.
“Well, then, just set him straight. You make the rules, Ali, and if the guy doesn’t like it, you send him to me.” Ray winked and stood up. “But I have no doubt that you can handle Jake Hawkins without too much trouble.”
Ali’s mouth opened, then she closed it. She knew it was useless to deny her connection with Jake. Both he and his father were going to tell the whole town about Joanie.
“Thank you, Ray. I’ll tell him.”
Just then a call came in, and Ali put on her headset as the sheriff left the room. She pressed the button on the phone. “Webster County Sheriff’s
Office.”
“Promise not to hang up on me,” a familiar voice said in a husky tone. Ali immediately felt a rush at hearing Jake’s voice.
“Tell me why I shouldn’t.”
“Because I just spent a fortune on flowers and more importantly I’m the father of your child. But mostly because I’m sorry for saying the things I said to you.”
Oh, yes, he was weakening her defenses. “What did you say your name was again?” she said teasingly.
“You know exactly who this is. But if you come by the hospital, I can give you a more personal hint…that I’m sure will stimulate your memory.”
Ali couldn’t catch her breath; her heart was racing like crazy. She looked up at one of the deputies who was watching her, and quickly glanced away. “Look, Jake, I have to get back to work.”
“Not until you promise to stop by and see me. Alone.”
“Jake, I’ve got to go.”
“Say you’ll come by. I want to see you.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll stop by tonight. We’ll talk.”
“Thanks, Ali-cat. I’ll be looking forward to tonight.”
Ali closed her eyes at the endearment. “I’ve got to go, Jake. Goodbye.” She hung up the phone, knowing she was in big trouble if she didn’t figure out a way to keep her distance.
Jake waited, not very patiently, for visiting hours to start. At 7:20, still no Ali. Damn, he knew she wasn’t coming. He picked up the remote and began flipping through the channels on the television. By the time he circled them all twice, the door to his room opened. He held his breath when Ali walked in.
He swallowed hard as she silently made her way to his bedside. She was dressed in a dark maroon sweater that highlighted her red hair and green eyes. White wool slacks enhanced her long legs.
“Okay, Jake,” she began. “I’m here. What did you want to talk about?”
He smiled at her, hoping to coax an answering smile from her. No such luck. “Well, first I want to apologize. I was rude the other day. You’ve had a lot to deal with, and I haven’t been very patient. I’ve never thanked you for having my child. It would have been so easy to get rid of her—”
Baby, Our Baby! Page 6
