Measure of Grace

by Al Lacy

  The other prisoners still gawked at the scene silently.

  “You’re my father, yes, “said Derick, “but that doesn’t make you free of fault. Why don’t you face it? You shouldn’t have beat up on Tom. And what you did to Mama was worse.”

  Stu’s breathing was hot and heavy.

  “It sure was, Papa,” said Diana. “Mama was only trying to protect me from you when you were going to hit me. And she took that violent beating for it. You should be ashamed of yourself for what you did to Mama.”

  Fixing the girl with a deadly glare, Stu hissed, “The day I walk out of here, girl, you’re gonna get the beating of your life. D’you hear me? And Derick, if you try to interfere, you’ll get the beating of your life. I’ve had enough of this insolent back talk! You two are out of line!”

  “But putting Mama in the hospital isn’t out of line?” said Diana.

  “Enough, girl!” said Stu. “You’re in for it. You just wait and see.”

  Diana met his gaze without showing fear. She knew the only reason she had no fear at the moment was because of the bars that separated them.

  “You can give me that look now, girl!” said Stu. “But when I get outta here, I’ll teach you some fear.”

  The thought of his threat changed Diana’s countenance, and he saw a touch of dread capture her eyes.

  “I’m sure you’ve thought of running away from home to escape what’s coming to you, girl. Well, if you ever do, I’ll track you down, and you’ll get a beating like you’ve never imagined. The world isn’t big enough for you to hide from me.”

  The thought of running away from home had just passed through Diana’s mind and when her father so quickly brought it up, it was like she was a trapped animal with no way to escape. Tears welled up in her eyes. She drew a ragged breath and broke down, weeping.

  Derick took her hand and said, “Come on, sis. We’re leaving right now.”

  “You can get away from me at this point, girl,” said Stu, “but I won’t always be locked up. I’ll beat you till you beg me to stop, and when I do, you’re gonna apologize for your insolence. You too, boy!”

  Derick softly pushed a sobbing Diana toward the door, ignoring his father’s latest threat.

  As Derick opened the door, Stu’s big voice thundered, “Payday will come for both of you! I mean it. Especially you, Diana. Just you wait and see!”

  Derick paused, gripping his sister’s hand, looked back, and said, “We came because Diana wanted to see you, Papa. She said you are our father, and we should come and see you. I warned her that you’d cuss her good when you saw her, but she still said we should come because you are our father. Boy, did we make a mistake.”

  Stu’s beefy face was a mask of wrath as the hot breath sawed in and out of his lungs and he glared at them.

  Suddenly, Sergeant Ben Chasen appeared in the hall, having heard Stu’s latest outburst because the hall door was open.

  “What’s going on, here?” he asked, noting Diana’s tears and Stu’s flushed features.

  “Papa’s mad at us,” said Derick. “We came to see him because we wanted to show him respect as our father, but he doesn’t appreciate it. He’s blaming my sister for his being in jail, and he’s making all kinds of threats of how he’s going to give her a real beating when he gets out of here.”

  “You two go on,” said Chasen, stepping out of the way so they could move down the hall.

  With an arm around his weeping sister, Derick hastily guided her toward the door that led to the police department offices.

  Chasen waited till they were through the door, then while the other prisoners looked on, he stepped up to Morrow’s cell. “So you like our jail, eh, Morrow?”

  Stu’s jaw jutted and his neck stiffened. “Whattaya mean?”

  “I heard you threatening both of them … especially Diana. ‘Payday’ was the word you used. If you beat that girl like Derick said you were threatening to—or him, either—you’ll be right back in here. And I remind you of what Chief Perry told you. If Mrs. Morrow presses charges against you for the beating you gave her, you’ll get a year in jail. And with what we know about you now, if you beat those two young people like you were threatening to, you could end up in prison for twenty years. Or longer.”

  Stu only stared at him, breathing hotly.

  Frowning, Chasen said, “Are you listening to me?”

  The big man pivoted, swinging a fist through the air, and sat down on his bunk.

  When Derick and Diana moved outside and walked toward the wagon, which was parked down the street a distance, Diana wiped tears from her eyes and said, “I wish Mama would press charges against him. Maybe in that year he was locked up, we could find a way to move where he couldn’t find us.”

  Derick let a few seconds pass. “He’d find us, sis. You heard his threat about what would happen if you tried to run away. Mama knows he’d find us, too. That’s why she’s afraid to press charges.”

  They reached the wagon, and both horses whinnied at them.

  Derick helped Diana up into the seat, rounded the wagon, and climbed up beside her. She was still crying as he put the team in motion, pulled into traffic, and started down the street.

  Holding the reins with his left hand, Derick took hold of her hand with the other and squeezed it. “This is why I wasn’t keen on the idea of coming to see him, sis. I was sure he’d light into you for talking to Tom.”

  Diana nodded. “So much for trying to show him respect as our father.”

  “Well, at least we tried.”

  “Yes,” she said, sniffling. “We tried.”

  Diana kept sniffling and wiping tears as they passed through Richmond, and when they reached the outskirts and headed into the country, she said, “Derick, I’m really scared. When Papa gets out of jail, he’ll probably beat me to death. With that temper of his, once he gets his hands on me, he won’t stop pounding till I’m dead. If we all left as a family, we’d be easy to find. But if I go alone, since I’m the one he’s really wanting to chastise, I could probably find someplace to hide till he gave up looking for me. Then, of course, I would have to go on through life without ever coming back here.”

  Derick sighed. “I’m afraid that he’ll beat you to death. I see no other choice for you but to run away.”

  Diana thought on it while the wagon bounced along the road between the open fields of tawny grass. “Derick, where do you think I could go so Papa can’t ever find me? I know he said the world isn’t big enough for me to hide from him, but even this country is big enough to hide me, if I can find the right place.”

  Derick rubbed his chin and shook his head. “I’ll have to think on that, sis.”

  “And of course, I’ll have to find a way to make a living, wherever I go,” said Diana, a quiver in her voice. “And the problem is, I don’t have much time to figure out where to go and what to do to make a living. Papa will be out in a month. I’ve got to leave soon. Real soon.”

  “I’ll put my mind to it,” said Derick. “I’ll think of something, I’m sure. There has to be a solution. You sure can’t stay here.”

  “I was thinking about relatives who might take me in,” said Diana, “but that would be the first place Papa would look. Like Uncle Gerald and Aunt Bertha in Minneapolis. Or Uncle Charles and Aunt Evelyn in Atlanta. But it wouldn’t be right to put them in the line of fire of Papa’s temper.”

  “You’re right about that,” said Derick. “It can’t be relatives. And we don’t have friends elsewhere, so that’s out. Besides, if we did, Papa would look there. It has to be somewhere he would never think to look.”

  “Right. Let me think on it. I’ll come up with something.”

  As they drew near the Morrow farm, Diana dried her tears. “Derick, we mustn’t tell Deborah, Daniel, or Dennis about Papa’s threats. We’ll just tell them we went to see him.”

  “Right,” agreed Derick. “There’s no reason at this point to upset them about that. Of course, when the day comes that you l
eave, we’ll have to tell them why you’re going away.”

  Diana nodded. “And we must appear positive about Mama’s condition at all times before them.”

  “Yes. We’ll do that.”

  That night as Diana lay in her bed in the girls’ room, her thoughts went to the escape she must make before her father got out of jail. While Deborah lay sound asleep in the other bed, Diana wiped tears with the sheet and wondered where she could go that her father would never find her, and what she would do to earn herself a living. She would be willing to do washings, or clean houses, or clerk in a store.

  Fear ran its icy fingers through her mind. She wiped more tears and thought of God. She didn’t know much about Him, but she did believe He was up there in heaven looking down on people around the globe.

  While fresh tears scalded her cheeks, she whispered, “God, I think You can hear me if You want to. And I hope You want to. I’ve heard people talk about how much You love us … especially Shamus and Maggie. I—I’m really scared, God. Shamus and Maggie say You know everything, so You know what Papa has done to Mama and Tom. And You know that he would probably beat me to death if I was here when he got out of jail. I … I have to run away. I have to go somewhere he won’t ever be able to find me.”

  Using the sheet once more to mop tears from her face, Diana swallowed hard and whispered, “Dear God, it really hurts to think about leaving. I’ll probably never be able to see Mama, Derick, Deborah, Daniel, or Dennis again.”

  This brought her emotions fully to the surface. She broke down and sobbed, muffling her cries by covering her mouth with the covers. When she was able to bring herself under control, she drew a shuddering breath and whispered, “Please, God. Please help me. I wouldn’t see Mama and my sister and brothers again if Papa killed me, either, so I have to go away. Would You help me to know what to do? Derick is trying to think of something, too. Please help me to be gone before Papa gets out of jail.”

  Diana dabbed at her tears again. “Dear God, I’ve heard Shamus pray at the table when we’ve eaten at their house. I want to do this right. He always prays in Your Son’s name, so I ask these things in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

  The next morning, Martha Morrow and Laura Thomas were talking about the problems the Morrows were facing.

  Laura said, “I don’t want to wear you out by causing you to talk too much, Martha, but if you knew the Lord, He could help in ways that no one else—”

  Laura’s words were cut off by Diana and Derick coming into the room.

  Both greeted Laura, then bent over their mother, kissing her cheek and asking how she was feeling.

  “I’m doing better,” Martha assured them.

  “You look better, Mama,” said Diana.

  “You sure do,” said Derick.

  “Laura has been such a help to me. She’s very encouraging about our problems, and every time I’ve needed a nurse, she’s rung her bell for me.”

  Diana stepped to Laura’s bed and said, “Thank you so much, Mrs. Thomas, for being so kind to Mama.”

  “Yes,” said Derick. “Thank you, ma’am.”

  Laura smiled. “I’m happy to do anything I can. You have a very sweet mother.”

  “And so do your children,” Diana said softly. “That is, if you have children.”

  “I sure do. I have two daughters and a son. Of course, they’re adults and married now, but they’re still little children in my eyes.”

  Diana returned to her brother’s side. Martha looked up into their faces and said, “Are your sister and brothers all right?”

  “They’re fine, Mama,” said Derick. “They told us to tell you that they miss you and love you and are looking forward to the day you can come home.”

  Tears misted Martha’s eyes. “Me too.”

  Derick flicked a glance at his sister. “Do you want me to tell her?”

  “We agreed she has to know right now,” said Diana. “It isn’t right to keep it from her. I’ll let you tell her.”

  “Tell me what?” said Martha.

  Derick took a deep breath, glanced at Laura, and said, “I really don’t like talking about our troubles in front of Mrs. Thomas because it may make her uncomfortable, but you have to know what happened at the jail yesterday, Mama.”

  “Don’t worry about me,” said Laura. “I’m fine. You tell your mother whatever it is she needs to know.”

  Derick gave Laura a thin smile, and was about to speak when Martha said, “Is this something you heard about, or did you two go to the jail when you left here?”

  “We went to the jail because I told Derick I wanted to go,” said Diana. “I felt we should go see Papa because he is our father.”

  “That was kind of you,” said Martha. “So what happened?”

  Derick gave his mother a detailed explanation of the incident at the jail, how their father had blamed Diana for everything that had happened because she was talking to Tom Wymore against his orders; and the threats he had made against Diana.

  “Mama,” he said, his face grim, “I’m afraid Papa is so mad at Diana that if he started beating on her, he wouldn’t quit till she was dead.”

  Martha put a shaky hand on Diana’s arm. “With his temper, he just might do that.”

  “We’ve been talking about it, Mama,” said Derick. “Diana can’t be home when Papa gets out of jail four weeks from now. She’s got to go somewhere he can never find her.”

  Martha’s lips quivered and her brow furrowed. “I hate to see it like this, but I agree. If she’s here when he gets out, it could be real bad.”

  Diana gripped the hand that was on her arm and said, “I’m terrified of what Papa will do to me if I’m here when he gets out of jail, Mama, but how am I going to leave you and my sister and brothers? You need me.”

  “I’m old enough to take care of them, sis,” said Derick.

  “Yes,” agreed Martha. “We’ll make it all right, Diana. We can’t take the chance that your father might beat you to death. We’ve got to come up with a place for you to go.”

  “It’ll have to be a long way from here, Mama,” said Derick. “As I told you, Papa said yesterday that if she tried to run away, he would find her no matter where she went.”

  Diana trembled as raw emotion squeezed her heart. She leaned over the bed, carefully embraced her mother, and said, “Oh, Mama, why does Papa have to be so mean? Why doesn’t he love his family like other men do?”

  “I don’t know, honey,” said Martha, sniffling. “That’s just the way he is. As I’ve told you before, he wasn’t that way when I married him. It was after you were born that he started getting mean, and with each child that came along, he just got worse.”

  Diana kissed her cheek. “Mama, we’d better go. We’re wearing you out. We’ll be back tomorrow.”

  “In the meantime,” said Derick, “we’ll try to come up with an idea for someplace for Diana to go.”

  Once again, both Derick and Diana thanked Laura for being so kind to their mother and left.

  As soon as they had passed through the door, Martha broke down and sobbed.

  Laura was not yet able to get out of bed, but she spoke to Martha in soothing tones, trying to comfort her. When Martha’s weeping subsided, Laura said, “Honey, this is a horrible thing you’ve got to deal with. My pastor could be a real help to you. He’s been out of town for a few days, but he’s due back today, and he said he would be in to see me when he got back. If you’ll let him, I know he can be a comfort to you.”

  Martha managed a smile. “Who is your pastor, Laura?”

  “Sherman Bradford.”

  “Oh, I’ve met him. Our neighbors, Shamus and Maggie O’Hearn, speak highly of him.”

  Laura’s eyes lit up. “My husband and I know Shamus and Maggie quite well, Martha. We often get together for meals.

  Picnics in the summertime. They are dear people. I’m sure you’ve found them good neighbors.”

  “Oh yes. Stu won’t let me see them very often, but—”

>   A distinguished looking man came into the room, carrying a Bible.

  “Pastor!” said Laura. “We were just talking about you. You know Martha Morrow? She lives on a neighboring farm to Shamus and Maggie O’Hearn.”

  Smiling warmly, the preacher said, “Yes, we’ve met. How are you, Mrs. Morrow? You know the O’Hearns well, do you?”

  “Yes, sir. Very well. Both of them have bragged about your preaching. They really love you.”

  “Well, I really love them, too,” said Bradford. “Shamus and Maggie are some of my most faithful members, as are Laura and her husband, Glenn.”

  “Glenn has been here twice since I was put in the room with Laura yesterday,” said Martha. “I like him very much. And, of course, I really like this dear lady very much, too.”

  Moving up to the side of Laura’s bed, the pastor chuckled and said, “I sort of like her, myself. How are you doing, Laura?”

  “Quite well, Pastor,” said Laura. “My doctor says I should be able to go home in another four or five days.”

  “Marvelous! How about my reading you one of the Psalms?”

  “I’d love that. How about Psalm 77? I love them all, but that’s one of my favorites.”

  Bradford opened his Bible and read the requested Psalm to Laura, and Martha took it all in, listening intently.

  When he had finished, Bradford commented on verse 13 and read it again.

  “ ‘Thy way, O God, is in the sanctuary: who is so great a God as our God?’ And the answer is,” he said, smiling, “there is no God like our wonderful God.”

  Bradford prayed with Laura, asking the Lord to heal her quickly for His own glory, and praised Him that she had come through her surgery so well.

  Martha observed the tender moment as Laura’s pastor prayed with her, thinking she had never seen anything like this. She was very much impressed with the pastor’s demeanor. Her opinion—as well as Stu’s—had been that all preachers were in it for the money, and taught their people to be fanatics about the Bible and its contents. Somehow, this man impressed her as being genuine and sincere in what he was doing. He wasn’t acting or speaking in a fanatical manner at all.