Cruise Chaos: A Humorous Cruise Ship Cozy Mystery (Cruise Ship Cozy Mysteries Book 3)

by A. R. Winters

  Cruise Chaos

  A.R. Winters

  Cruise Chaos

  Copyright 2019 by A. R. Winters

  www.arwinters.com

  This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only.

  This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, events or locales is purely coincidental.

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Untitled

  Sneak Peak: A Berry Deadly Welcome

  Chapter Two

  Chapter 1

  Working on a cruise liner was always an adventure, because each day managed to bring something new and unexpected.

  This was especially true on the morning before we launched from our home port of New Orleans, because I didn’t even know what my job would be on this voyage.

  “Hey there, Miss Cruise Director!” shouted Cece, my loud-mouthed friend who worked in housekeeping.

  We’d just boarded the ship and I was in the staff mess hall, nursing a cup of mediocre coffee while sitting on an orange bench seat at one of the plastic picnic tables that filled the dining facility.

  Cece slid into the seat opposite me, her fingers wrapped around a cup of her own not-quite-good coffee.

  “I’m not the cruise director.” I placed the coffee down on the table. “I only just applied for the position. It’ll take weeks for HR to make their final choice.”

  Cece huffed a dramatic sigh. “What a shame. I was hoping you’d be able to get me a cool new job. So are you still doing social media?”

  She was referring to my old position as the ship’s social media manager. I spent my time finding the most interesting things on the ship, taking pictures of them, and throwing said pictures onto the ship’s social media channels.

  “I don’t know.” I tapped my fingers against the side of my mug nervously. “I’ve got a meeting in a minute with someone called Kelly Cline. Have you heard of her?”

  Cece shook her head. “Nope. Must be new. Where are you meeting her?”

  I frowned and pulled up the text message I’d received again. “B248. That mean anything to you?”

  “Yep.” Cece leaned back in her seat and closed her eyes like she was about to take a nap, so I kicked the toe of her shoe with mine.

  “Hey!”

  “Don’t tune out on me. What’s in B248?”

  Cece leaned forward, rubbing her foot and checking her shoe for scuff marks.

  “Girl, you should know. You’ve been there enough times. It’s the cruise director’s office.”

  Ugh! I should have known that, but the offices in the administrative wing of the ship were normally referred to by their use, not their designated number. That was my excuse and I was sticking to it.

  “Oh, great. So I guess we do get a new cruise director this trip.”

  “Of course. The ship would sink without a cruise director. Literally.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh at that. The last two cruises would have been a lot smoother had there been no cruise director at all.

  “Yeah, right. I better go meet this Kelly Cline and see what she’s like.”

  Cece nodded. “Ask her if she’s a criminal.”

  “I’m not going to ask the new cruise director if she’s a criminal, Cece! I’ve got to make a good impression.”

  She shrugged. “Suit yourself. Might save some time.”

  With a smile on my face, I left the mess hall went to find this new cruise director.

  It was a beautiful morning, so I walked along one of the outside decks for most of the route to the cruise director’s office. The air was slightly cool. It smelled salty and fresh and, with the aid of the early morning sun, made me feel that the world was full of promise and possibilities.

  With the passengers still not onboard and most of the crew somewhere inside the ship, it was almost as if I had the whole ocean liner to myself. With a final deep, calming breath of ocean air, I headed back into the ship near B248.

  Inside, the air was notably cooler and smelled of metal and fresh paint. The section of the ship that contained the cruise director’s office was located just above the water line, a better position than where my cabin was located in the bowels of the ship.

  The office door was open already when I arrived, and as I approached, I got the distinct impression of a busy bumble bee. Kelly Cline was a slight, pale-skinned young woman who looked close to my age, with long black hair and a bright yellow dress. She had on dark lipstick, purple nail polish, and a pair of sunflower-yellow heels that, despite adding a couple of inches to her height, still brought the top of her head close to the level of my chin.

  Kelly was standing in the middle of the room with a cell phone pressed against her ear, and I could see behind her that the desk phone was sitting off the hook, with the receiver on the desk as if she had placed someone on hold manually.

  When I arrived, I found myself hovering in the doorway. She was talking loudly on the phone and I didn’t want to knock or buzz to interrupt, but I also didn’t want to march in uninvited. I hadn’t even met her yet.

  “Yes, yes, yes, and definitely yes. Okay… If you think that’s best… yes… in about an hour… you too.”

  The hand holding the phone dropped to her side, and she acknowledged my presence with a friendly smile.

  “Hi!” she said.

  “Hi. I’m here for a meeting…?”

  Kelly’s smile faltered for a moment and my nerves began to creep in before she smiled again, seemingly twice as bright as before.

  “Oh! Adrienne?”

  “That’s right.”

  “Could you give me two seconds?” she looked at me expectantly. Normally when people ask that, they don’t wait for acknowledgment—they just assume you’ll wait. But Kelly kept an expectant look on her face until I responded.

  “Sure. No problem.”

  “Thanks!” Kelly immediately turned around and picked up the phone on her desk.

  “Hello? Hello? Hello?” She frowned, leaning over to the far side of the desk to put the receiver back in its cradle. “They must have hung up.”

  Kelly turned around and hopped up to sit on the edge of the desk, facing toward me, legs swinging and heels kicking. I smiled back at her. She was certainly a welcome change from the last two cruise directors. She might actually be… nice?

  “So. Adrienne.” She gave me an expectant look to make sure she had my name right. I nodded at her. “Are you all set?”

  I shrugged my shoulders. “Sure. I guess I’m still on the same job as before? Social Media Manager?”

  Kelly’s smile faltered just a little, before bouncing back.

  “Hmm. Hol
d on. Let me check something.”

  Kelly hopped off the desk and hurried behind it, taking a seat in the chair and reaching for the computer mouse. She stared intently at the computer screen, clicking every so often.

  The phone rang again, and Kelly’s smile drooped as she glared at it. On the third ring, her smile recovered and she answered the call.

  “Hello? … Yes, do you mind holding for just a moment? … Thank you.” Kelly stared down at the phone’s control panel for a few seconds before shrugging and placing the receiver back on the desk.

  Mouse clicks filled the air again for a moment, and then she lifted both hands up and slammed them on the desk with such force that I jumped a little.

  “Oh, shoot! Shoot, Adrienne! Shoot!”

  “I’m sorry…?” I stepped back toward the doorway.

  Kelly stood up again, hurried around the desk so fast it was almost a run, and came to a stop in front of me with both her hands pressed into the sides of her head, grabbing fistfuls of her hair. “Adrienne! Shoot!”

  Not knowing what else to do, I flashed her a nervous smile.

  “I didn’t send you the email! I just checked—I didn’t send it!”

  I let out a breath that I hadn’t realized I’d been holding.

  “That’s okay. Can you just catch me up on what it said? Email, conversation, it’s all the same. I’m sure it’s no big deal.”

  Kelly released her grip on her hair and let her hands fall back by her sides, a smile, though smaller than before, returning.

  “Really?”

  “Really,” I said in my most reassuring tone. “It’s fine.”

  “Oh, good. I’d hate for you to be angry at me, even if I’ll only be here temporarily.”

  “Temporarily?”

  Kelly nodded. “I’m acting cruise director just for this trip, while HR recruits a full-time replacement. You’re in the running, aren’t you?”

  “Well, maybe. I did apply, but I may not have enough experience yet though.”

  Kelly’s smile returned in full force. “You’ll get some good experience this cruise!”

  “Oh?” Was this about the email she forgot to send me?

  Kelly nodded. “You see, you’ve been put in charge of the special event for this cruise.”

  “Special event?” I tried not to look too concerned.

  Our previous cruise had a special event involving a celebrity chef, and it went only marginally more smoothly than the Titanic’s first cruise.

  “The murder!”

  “What!?” I’d just about had my fill of murders.

  Kelly frowned. “Oh, you don’t even know about that? Like, not at all?”

  I shook my head. Surely there hadn’t been a murder already. We hadn’t even boarded the passengers yet!

  “The last cruise director arranged it all. It’s a murder mystery event. Fifty of our passengers have special tickets to be a part of it. That’s what the email I meant to send you was about. HR told me to tell you that you’ve been given the position of Asec.”

  “Of… what?”

  “Acting Special Event Coordinator. Asec.”

  “Wait, wait, wait,” I said, holding up my palm. “The ship’s holding a murder mystery event, and I’m in charge of it? And I’m finding out about this… just now?”

  “Right! I’m so glad you said you weren’t mad though. Some people would be really irked finding out at the last minute, wouldn’t they?”

  Yes, some people would.

  This person.

  But I did tell her it wasn’t a big deal, and she did seem to be awfully busy. It seemed almost cruel to be angry at her. Really, HR should have contacted me themselves instead of doing it via the temporary cruise director.

  “So what do I have to do?”

  Kelly stood there staring off into space for a moment. I began to wonder if I’d actually asked her the question or if I’d imagined it.

  Finally, she responded.

  “Do?”

  “Well, yes. Is there some information about the event? A brochure? Where is it going to be held? You know, stuff like that.”

  “Oh.” Kelly frowned in thought, and then suddenly her face lit up again. “There’s a file! Over here! Wait!”

  She spun around and hurried behind the desk, yanked open a drawer, and pulled out a big, thick manila envelope. On the front was scrawled Beverly’s Murder Mystery.

  “It’s all in here. I think. I hope so, anyway!” Kelly scuttled back around the table, her legs a clip-clopping whir of heels as she hurried along. “There you go. If you’ve got any questions, my door is always open.” She frowned again. “I can’t find the key,” she explained.

  With a grin, I reached out and gently lifted the ID badge that hung from a lanyard around her neck.

  “Here. This is the key. It’s electronic.”

  “Oh! Wonderful! Well, for you, my door will always be open, anyway.”

  “Thanks. And do you know where the events are taking place?”

  Kelly bit her lip in thought. “In the conference suite, I think. Conference Room A is going to be a library, Conference Room B is a lounge, and so on. I think it’s in the envelope. If not, you could ask a passenger. I’m sure they’ve been sent all the information.”

  I had to bite my tongue. Was she really suggesting I ask a passenger where the event I was managing would be taking place? Only on a Swan cruise… I thought, shaking my head to myself.

  “Is something the matter?” Kelly peered at my shaking head, a look of dire concern on her face.

  “Oh, no. I’m sure everything will be fine. What’s my job title again?”

  “Acting Special Event Coordinator. Asec.”

  “Right. Okay. I’ll have a look at this and let you know if I have any questions.” I held the manila envelope up against my chest.

  “Okay, great! If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask. I won’t know the answer, but don’t hesitate anyway!”

  I grinned at her and she smiled back at me, but I couldn’t tell whether she was actually trying to be funny or just being honest with me. It didn’t really matter.

  “Hello?” called a husky male voice from the doorway.

  We both turned to look. There was a middle-aged deliveryman with a metal dolly and what looked to be a bookcase balanced on it.

  “Oh, library books?” asked Kelly.

  “And shelves, ma’am,” said the man.

  “Adrienne here will direct you,” she said to the man. She tapped the envelope I was holding. “Check in there. That stuff’s gotta go the library for the murder mystery. It’s part of the set.”

  “O…kay?” I said, backing up a few steps. This wasn’t exactly how I imagined my day was going to begin.

  “Sorry to rush you, but I’ve got someone on hold and a trillion things to catch up on. But don’t hesitate to call if you need any help.”

  Kelly was already turning away, and she quickly clip-clopped back behind her desk where she reached for the phone receiver that was still sitting there, waiting for her.

  “But—”

  “Don’t hesitate!” she interrupted, before reaching down for the phone.

  What could I do? Nothing but my best. And if that wasn’t good enough, well, I’d fake it ‘til I made it.

  I went to Kelly’s door and smiled at the delivery man.

  “I just need to double-check where this goes,” I said, opening the envelope and pulling out a stack of papers.

  “You should have thought of that before I lugged all this up here, shouldn’t you?”

  Smile and nod, smile and nod. Of course I should have. With my psychic powers and magic intuition.

  Scanning through the papers, I found what I was looking for: an itinerary with all the locations listed.

  “Right. This needs to go to Conference Room B.”

  “Where’s that?” asked the man, scratching his head.

  “Umm, just a sec…”

  Chapter 2

  “Help! He
lp! Help!” was how I greeted Sam, my best friend and roommate, when I returned to our cabin.

  She was lying on the top bunk staring at her phone when I entered. Her blonde bobbed hair rose from her pillow at the sound.

  She pushed herself up into a sitting position on her bed and looked down at me with an inquiring smile on her chubby cheeks.

  “What’s up?”

  I stalked inside, a frown on my face, though I wasn’t really sure if I was annoyed or excited. I like to plan things out in advance, so the whole murder-mystery thrown-in-my-face thing was quite distressing. But I also enjoy a challenge.

  Our cabin was small and spartan. However, the light in there was so dim, if you wrapped yourself up in a blanket and closed your eyes, it could have an air of metallic coziness.

  We had metal bunk beds attached to the left-hand wall, and on the right was a tiny closet divided into two smaller halves, one for each of us, as well as a metal protrusion from the wall which acted as a desk and an uncomfortable chair to go with it. A small doorway next to it led to our teeny tiny bathroom.

  “What’s up is that I’ve got a new job, apparently. But the new cruise director forgot to tell me.”

  “Ooh, what’s the job? And how did she forget to tell you? Is she new to this or something?”

  “I don’t think so. I think she was just overwhelmed, buzzing around her office like a bee in a bottle and didn’t seem to know what was going on.” I held up my manila envelope. “She gave me this. It explains everything.”

  Sam climbed down from her top bunk and sat down on the edge of mine.

  “The job?” she prodded.

  “Oh. Well, I’m the new asec.”