Dad Today, Groom Tomorrow

by Holly Jacobs

  “Oh,” the other two women chorused.

  “Now, I’m not going to ask you two for any more particulars,” Pearly assured them, “but I will say, you should have told us.”

  “I—”

  “So when’s the wedding?” Pearly asked.

  “Wedding?” Louisa choked. “There’s not going to be a wedding. Joe’s here because of Aaron. Nothing more, nothing less.”

  “And that kiss?” Pearly asked, slyly.

  “It was just…It didn’t mean…”

  Joe waited, hoping Louisa could explain away that kiss, because he couldn’t. He didn’t have a clue why he’d kissed her.

  What they had so long ago was over. All that was left was their bond through their son. But that type of bond didn’t require kissing, and Joe felt as if he definitely did require kissing…kissing Louisa again soon.

  “Well then, girls,” Pearly said, rubbing her hands together with obvious anticipation, “we might not have fixed our Louisa up, but it would appear that the Perry Square Business Association is about to have another party to welcome her boyfriend to town.”

  “We’ve got the pizza party coming up. We can introduce her boyfriend around then,” Mabel said. “Then when they get married, we’ll have a good and proper reception for them.”

  “Joe’s not my boyfriend. And there’s not going to be a reception or a wedding,” Louisa said, though the three women were busy chattering to themselves and were ignoring her.

  “Weddings seem to be becoming a habit.” Josie emphasized the statement by blowing a huge bubble with her gum, then snapping it loudly. “I wonder when Mr. Right will find me?” She sighed.

  “There’s not going to be a wedding,” Lou said, louder this time.

  “Well, I’ve got my Elmer,” Mabel said. “We’re going out again this weekend.”

  “Speaking of that,” said Pearly to Mabel. “Did you know about this and not tell us?”

  “No. Elmer doesn’t gossip, more’s the pity,” Mabel said. “I’m sure he knew Louisa would tell us in her own time.”

  “All right,” Josie said with a nod. “So, about a reception. You know these things take time to plan.”

  “There won’t be a reception,” Louisa said with force. “There won’t be a reception because there’s not going to be a wedding. Joe and I don’t feel like that about each other.”

  “So, you kiss men you don’t care about?” Pearly asked.

  “No. I…we…Joe, help me out, would you?”

  “Ladies, it’s such a pleasure to meet Louisa’s friends,” he said, rather diplomatically.

  Then suddenly, out of the blue, he heard himself say, “And Louisa’s right, there’s not going to be a wedding, but not because she wasn’t asked.”

  He couldn’t believe he said it, but the reaction of the three women was almost worth the angry look that Louisa shot him.

  “You asked her to marry you?” Josie said with a huge sigh. “That’s so romantic.”

  “Oh, honey, that’s sweet,” Mabel crooned.

  “Joe!” Louisa yelled.

  “Oh, I’m going to get Elmer for not filling me in on any of this,” Mabel muttered.

  Pearly was the only quiet one. She stood there studying Joe. “So, you asked her to marry you?”

  “Yes. I should have done it years ago. Well, actually, I did ask her years ago, but I made a mistake. A big one. Maybe if I’d been smarter then, we wouldn’t have wasted all this time.”

  “Smart man,” Pearly said with an approving nod.

  “Not a smart man, a dead man,” Louisa muttered.

  “Are you going to come to our pizza party and let me introduce you around?” Pearly, ignoring Louisa’s obvious distress, asked Joe.

  “I’ll be there. I’d love to meet the rest of Louisa’s friends.”

  “But—” Louisa’s protest was silenced when Pearly pulled her into a warm embrace.

  “Now, the boy has the right idea. Even if you said no, and won’t marry him, he should know your friends. After all, as Aaron’s father, he’ll be a part of your lives even without a marriage.”

  “And a reception,” Josie added. “I really like receptions.”

  “But—”

  “Did I ever tell you of my cousin Fancy Mae Stump?” Pearly asked.

  Josie and Mabel both groaned.

  Louisa shook her head. “No. I’m pretty sure I’d remember a name like Fancy Mae Stump.”

  “Well, Fancy Mae had a fancy name, but unfortunately she had a rather stumplike quality. All the Stumps—they were my mother’s cousin’s kids—were short and stocky. We always thought their mama gave them such pretty names to make up for the fact they were destined for stumpyness.”

  “Oh, no, here she goes again,” Josie muttered, then blew the biggest bubble that Joe had ever seen, popping it as a sort of punctuation to her sentence.

  Pearly shot the redhead an annoyed glare, cleared her throat loudly, then continued. “Now, where was I?”

  “Fancy Mae,” Mabel supplied.

  “Right. Well, Fancy Mae met Milton Hedges at a barn dance at the Coopers’ farm one summer.” She stopped a moment, then said, “Did I ever tell you about the Coopers’ prize hog, Garner?”

  “No, but you know the rule, one story at a time,” Josie said. “As a matter of fact, the new rule should be one story a day…that’s all anyone should have to bear.”

  “Bear? Why I’ll have you know—”

  “Fancy Mae,” Mabel said, interrupting the potential squabble.

  “Yes, well she met Milton and danced with him all night but didn’t seem to realize he was interested in her. She told my mama that he probably was just pleased to find a woman willing to overlook the wart on the end of his nose.”

  Looking pleased with herself, Pearly folded her arms over her chest and looked back and forth between Joe and Louisa.

  Finally Louisa said, “Uh, Pearly, I know you always have a moral to your stories, and maybe I’m being dense, but I don’t see this one’s.”

  “Why, it’s as plain as the wart on the end of Milton’s face…he didn’t dance with Fancy Mae because she was convenient, or even willing. He danced with her because he liked her. After he convinced her that he really liked her despite her stumpyness, they both realized that the likin’ wasn’t all there was, there was lovin’ too. They married and had a bunch of warty, stumpy kids and you never did see such a happy family.”

  “For pity’s sake, Pearly, no one sees a moral in that,” Josie said.

  Pearly sighed a put-upon sigh and said, “Louisa’s Joe wasn’t just kissin’ her ’cause they were old friends, or even because they have a son. Why, it’s as clear as the wart on—”

  “—Milton Hedges’s nose that they still have feelings for each other,” Mabel finished for Pearly and punctuated the sentence with a huge sort of girly gaga sigh that would have sounded more at home coming from a teenager than from a woman so many years his senior.

  Pearly smiled, obviously pleased. “Right you are.”

  She turned to Joe and Louisa, “Talk to you soon. Nice meeting you, Joe. I’m looking forward to getting to know you.”

  “Uh, same here, ladies,” Joe said weakly.

  He felt as if he’d been caught up in a whirlwind, and as the three swept out of the store, he felt himself fall back to earth with a thud.

  “And that,” Louisa said weakly, “was the heart of the Perry Square Business Association. Your arrival will be up and down the square in less time than it takes me to wrap a box of candy.”

  “I’m part of your life now, Louisa. Your friends would have to know sometime.”

  “Yes,” she said without much enthusiasm.

  “Does it bother you?”

  “Of course not,” she said quickly, almost too quickly.

  “Because you don’t look happy.”

  “I’m a private person, I don’t—” She stopped short and then changed the subject. “You were going to talk to me about something—something
that sounded serious—before they walked in.”

  “Yes, I was. Come on, let’s sit down.” He led her to the couch she kept over by the cards.

  He let her sit down first, then sat right next to her, rather than on the other end of the couch.

  If he’d sat down first, he knew his thigh wouldn’t be pressed against hers right now. She’d be as far away as possible.

  Maybe it was time to change that.

  Aaron was still his primary concern, but the more time he spent with Louisa, the more he realized that he still wanted her. And that desire grew with each passing day. It pressed against his chest making it hard to breathe when she was around.

  And yet, how could he want someone he couldn’t trust?

  “You wanted to ask me something?” she prompted.

  He forced himself to concentrate on the question at hand. Later, when he was away from her and could think, he’d reflect on this need and how to address it.

  “It’s about Aaron,” he said. “One of the kids in his class commented on the fact that my name is Delacamp, and his is Clancy. I’d like to have his last name legally changed. He’s a Delacamp.”

  “I didn’t want to suggest it, but I’ve thought about it,” she said.

  That surprised him. “You’ve thought about it?”

  “Joe, I didn’t give him a name for a week after he was born because I couldn’t decide what was right. What was fair. Finally I used my last name just because I thought it would be easier for him.”

  “I thought you wanted to forget he was a Delacamp, just like you’d forgotten me,” he admitted.

  “I never forgot you, Joe. Believe what you will of me, but don’t believe that. I thought about you every day. I wondered about you. I almost called you so many times.”

  “Then why didn’t you? I was beating myself up worrying about you, wondering what I’d done. And then, as the pain receded, there was anger. I was furious that you’d left me like that, without a word.”

  “I’m so sorry, Joe.” She laid a hand gently on his forearm. “We keep coming back to this. We keep circling back to the past, to the whys and the recriminations. I am so sorry. There’s no excuse. I was young. I was scared.”

  That small touch made him hungry for more, but instead of pulling her into his arms, he managed to ask the question that had been plaguing him. “Did you really think I’d desert you and the baby?”

  “No. No, I was more afraid that you wouldn’t, and that you’d resent us a little more each day. That the resentment would grow and that one day you’re going to realize what I’d known all along—that I wasn’t good enough for you, that I didn’t belong with you and never would, no matter what I did. You would think I’d trapped you and that I’d ruined your life and shattered your dreams.”

  “You were my dream,” he practically whispered, once again trying to reassure her.

  “But in the end, I might have been your nightmare. I was too afraid to let that happen, so I ran. And I am sorry.”

  He was about to argue, to let her know that would never have happened, but she held up her hand.

  “Joe,” she said, her voice clogged with emotion. “I can’t talk about this anymore right now. About Aaron’s last name—I think we need to leave it up to him, but I think it would be good.”

  “Then we’ll talk to him. Together,” he said.

  They would talk to their son, but Louisa wouldn’t talk to him.

  She got up and left the showroom, disappearing into the back area. He didn’t follow her.

  Not good enough?

  Is that really how she’d felt?

  That day Elmer had mentioned how he’d kept Louisa hidden away and hadn’t included her in family events. He thought she hadn’t wanted to be included, but looking back, he could see how she might interpret it as a sign that she was inferior, something to be kept out of sight.

  How could he explain that he’d wanted to keep her separate from his family, from that world, not because he was ashamed of her but because she was too good for them?

  What a mess.

  With sudden clarity he realized he wanted more than to live on the fringes of Louisa and Aaron’s life.

  He wanted so much more.

  What he’d felt for Louisa all those years ago hadn’t died at all. What he felt now wasn’t exactly the same. Back then he’d loved her with all the intensity of a young man just coming into his prime.

  And now? What he felt was different. He wasn’t sure just what it was, but it was something.

  He loved the way she was with Aaron.

  He’d walked in on her talking to Elmer a couple of times, and she’d sounded like the old Louisa…laughing, bubbling over with enthusiasm for their son, for her store.

  He wanted her to talk to him like that.

  He’d made the first step in gaining his son’s affections, but he hadn’t made much of any progress with his son’s mother.

  He hadn’t even realized that he wanted to make progress until now, until this moment. But there it was, so clear and intense he couldn’t believe he’d missed it before.

  He cared about Louisa.

  It wasn’t just some leftover feelings from their past. It was something new and different. It was something he wanted to explore.

  Slowly he was chipping away at her, discovering things he’d never realized back in Lyonsville. But he still wanted better answers than she’d given him, because maybe if he understood, he could trust her again.

  And maybe, maybe, if he could trust her, they could start something new, something real.

  Chapter Five

  “Do you have plans this afternoon?” Joe asked Louisa Saturday at breakfast.

  It was his breakfast, she reflected. For the rest of the world, it was somewhere between lunch and dinner.

  Three weeks.

  He lived with Elmer…well, at least slept at Elmer’s. But the rest of the time he was here.

  She was getting used to having him around and couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or not.

  “No. Not real plans. Saturdays are when Aaron and I try to get all the household chores done and take care of the shopping and stuff. We did everything except the vacuuming. Why?”

  She’d hoped by now things would be less awkward. And maybe they were, at least between Joe and Aaron. But she felt things were decidedly more awkward between her and Joe.

  He made her…nervous.

  Every time she turned around, there he was. Since that kiss at her store, he hadn’t touched her and she was…relieved. Of course that little sizzling sense of attraction she felt for him was just some leftover girlhood crush. Or maybe it was simply a grown woman’s attraction to a good-looking man.

  She could deal with it. And she was relieved that he hadn’t kissed her again.

  The fact that she’d dreamed about that kiss—dreamed about it every night—meant nothing.

  She realized Joe was speaking as she sat fantasizing about kissing him.

  “…and I’d like to go.”

  “I’m sorry.” She’d missed what he’d said entirely. “Where did you want to go?”

  “The peninsula. I know it’s too late in the season for swimming, but it’s warm enough to just spend the day on the beach. I think it might be fun.” He paused and then added, “I haven’t been there yet and I’d like the first time I go to be with you.”

  Louisa’s initial reaction was a sort of quick affirmative. His comment about going with her gave her a warm, melty sort of feeling.

  And because she wanted to say yes, she’d have to say no.

  Absolutely not.

  She had enough memories of the past bombarding her. She didn’t want to deal with a dream from the past, as well. Going to the peninsula with Joe was so close to what they’d dreamed of, and yet the situation they were in was miles away from what they’d planned.

  After that dart had landed on Erie they’d read everything they could find on the city, and of course that included information about
Presque Isle State Park. It comprised a natural peninsula that stretched out into Lake Erie and provided the city with its bay. She could quote the facts, list them all, and still the fact remained—she didn’t want to go with Joe.

  “Are you sure you want to go today? It’s already almost four and it gets dark so much earlier these days,” she said, hoping he’d change is mind.

  “It’s just in time for a dinner picnic. We can watch the sunset. Besides, I don’t think Erie has many more nice weekends coming its way, does it?”

  “No,” she said, knowing her fate was sealed.

  “So? I think Aaron would enjoy it, don’t you?” he pressed.

  Yeah, sure Aaron would enjoy it. But would she?

  “Yes, he would.” She knew when to admit defeat. “We spent a great deal of time there during the summer. It was kind of you to think of inviting us.”

  “I wasn’t being kind, Lou,” Joe said. There was the faintest hint of annoyance in his tone.

  “I didn’t mean to upset you,” she said.

  “You didn’t,” he said, then stopped. “Okay, maybe you did a little.” He smiled.

  Louisa felt some of the tension in her chest ease at the sight of his slightly crooked grin.

  “It’s just,” he continued, “I want us to be a family, not just three people sharing a living space. Doing things together. That’s what a family does.”

  “Not mine.” Unless you counted the times she went with her mom to find her father and drag him home. That was what constituted the Clancy family togetherness.

  “Nor mine. But I’m pretty sure I read it someplace. Or maybe I saw it on some talk show.”

  It was a truce and Lou accepted it with a laugh. “Ah, you watch talk shows?” She tsked. “It’s a terrible vice.”

  “Before I came here, there were a lot of hours to fill. Talk shows kept me company.”

  She touched his hand. “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. I’m here now. And I want to see if the talk shows are right about families, that spending time together can be fun.”

  He turned his hand and stroked the inside of her palm.

  She pulled her hand away as if his touch burned.