Melting Into You (Due South Book 2)

by Tracey Alvarez

  “Jerome—Jerome-the-cheat. He bought me a ring and he told me—the slimy bastard—he’d pay for me to go to university, since I got pregnant at twenty and never went. He said he’d take care of me.” Her mood flipped a one-eighty, and a solitary tear leaked from her eye.

  “You want a man to take care of you?”

  “Is that so bad? Simon always called me his princess,” she said. “Simon loved doing everything for me.”

  Bloody hell! Ben pressed his lips together to prevent the top one from curling.

  Marci slumped onto the bar stool and did the hair-toss-eyelash-flutter combination, her gaze zeroing in on him again, as if she was a scientist examining mold in a petri dish. “You know…We could get married—kind of a you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours deal. You’d stay Jade’s daddy, and I’d get someone to take care of me.”

  If blood could literally freeze, his would be shredding his veins and arteries with jagged chunks of ice.

  Marry Marci?

  He dragged a hand out of his pocket and raked it through his hair. Opened his mouth. Shut it. Opened it again. “What?”

  She pointed the pink nail at him, then at herself. “You, me, Jade. We’d be a family.”

  His head spun at the unexpected turns in this conversation. They’d be a family? Holy hell. Had the hair dye seeped into Marci’s skull and burned out half her brain cells?

  “You don’t want to marry me and live in Oban—you don’t even like me, and you hate Stewart Island.”

  “Oh, we wouldn’t live on Stewart Island, you big dummy.” She giggled, the high-pitched, nasally sound made him want to puncture his eardrums with a rusty screwdriver. “We’d live in Auckland and you’d get a decent job.”

  Resting her chin on her palm, she leaned forward. “And I like you well enough, cutie—men who talk a lot are overrated in my book. Your sullen, verbally constipated thing? Perfect. You’d take care of Jade the way Simon used to, while I go to university.” Another giggle, this time infused with suggestiveness. “I’d do things to you in the bedroom that’d make you want to be a house-husband.”

  The idea of sleeping with this blonde-haired piranha made his nuts crawl up inside his body. Ben sucked in a deep breath.

  Be reasonable. Be calm. Don’t punch a hole through the fridge door.

  Maybe he was a big dummy, but he had smarts enough not to tackle the issue of sex with her. Insulting Marci’s ego wouldn’t be in his best interests. “I have a decent job.”

  “Running tourists around to stare at sharks? Picking your nose while a bunch of men go fishing? You’d get a real job in Auckland.”

  “A real job, like a pencil-pushing drone in a government department? Or an accountant?”

  She thrust out her chest and folded her arms. “Better pencil-pushing than ladling chum into the sea.”

  He leaned a hip on the counter, tried to wrangle the multitude of thoughts stampeding through his brain. “I couldn’t do a desk job full time, it’d drive me insane. I’m dyslexic, Marci, like our daughter.” Funny how saying the words out loud now drained them of the insidious power they’d had over him for decades.

  Marci’s lips pinched tight. “Jade is not dumb.”

  Six months ago, the implication that dyslexia equaled lower intelligence would’ve nettled his temper. Now? Not so much. He had a gutsy little fighter as a daughter and a positive reflection of himself through Kezia’s eyes.

  “She’s smart and talented, and she’s also dyslexic. She’s been tested, and I’ve gotten her help.”

  Marci made a derogative noise in her throat and drummed her nails on the countertop. “I’ll get a second opinion in Auckland. I doubt she’s dyslexic at all.” She tossed her hair again. “We’ll leave on the Sunday-evening ferry. Jade can still have her birthday sleepover tomorrow—see? I’m not a monster.”

  “You can’t be serious.” Asking him to choose between his daughter, his life and family in Oban. And Kezia.

  He’d never given marriage much thought; he’d never wanted a bar of it. Tied to one woman with even more responsibilities loaded on his plate? Ah, pass, and sod off. Then he’d found Kezia, and being with her seemed less like a responsibility and more like an opportunity. An opportunity to be happier than he’d ever dreamed.

  Except caught up in this mess was a little girl who called him daddy.

  “A good lawyer isn’t cheap. You could sell up everything and you’d still lose. Jade’s coming with me, but because I can see you care for her, I’m giving you the option of continuing to be her daddy.”

  Lawyer. Call his lawyer. Ah, shit. Ben didn’t dare check his watch, because Friday evening with a fine weekend forecast? His lawyer would’ve already left his office and headed for the mountains with his snowboard.

  His palms sweated and he swiped them down his jeans. Humor her then, dumbass. Humor her to buy some time to sort out this fucked-up-beyond-all-recognition problem.

  Ben peeled his lips into a smile. “I’m sure we can work something out.”

  Marci shrugged and slid off the bar stool. “Good. You have until Sunday to make up your mind—Jade?” She called as she sauntered to the hallway door. “Show me your pretty bags, baby. I hope you used lots and lots of glitter.”

  He stalked out of the kitchen and onto his deck. Sucking in gulps of brine-scented air, he stared over the choppy whitecaps to the The Mollymawk. The boat his father always wanted Stewart Island Dive to have—the boat that almost cost him his home and business earlier in the year. The boat he’d sacrifice in an instant if it meant keeping Jade.

  But keeping Jade just got complicated.

  “Ben!”

  He whirled at Marci’s shrill voice.

  She stood hipshot in the doorway, her plucked eyebrows drawn together. “Jade’s not in her room.”

  “Have you checked—?”

  Yet another hair toss and eye roll. “Of course I checked the other rooms, I’m not thick.”

  Thick-skinned, maybe. A thin stream of smoke spiraled out of Kezia’s chimney further down the hill.

  Oh, hell. Kezia. Ben sighed, and he was pretty sure something splintered inside him. Something now irreparably broken. “I know where she’s gone.”

  Chapter 16

  Kezia had just checked the tray of baking cheese scones when Jade and Sparky burst into her kitchen in a bawling, barking frenzy.

  Zoe rushed over to wrap an arm around Jade’s shoulders. “What’s the matter, Jadey?”

  Kezia glanced at the still swinging door. “Cara, does your mum or dad know you’re here?”

  Sparky stuck close to her mistress’s ankles as Zoe led Jade farther into the kitchen. The dog’s normal hyper-wagging tail was tucked low between her legs, so Kezia didn’t have the heart to order her outside.

  Tears still trickled down Jade’s cheeks, and she shook her head. “They were”—her chest heaved—“fighting.” A watery gulp. “About…me!”

  Jade let out a raw, pain-filled cry that fisted around Kezia’s heartstrings.

  No one—no one—hurt one of her bambine.

  Kezia sat at the dining table and gently tugged Jade into her lap. The girl curled close, like a small animal seeking shelter, and wept. Smoothing silky stands of Jade’s hair, Kezia murmured to her in Italian.

  Zoe darted away and then returned with the tissue box. She pulled out two. “Here you go. They’re nice soft ones that won’t make your nose red.”

  Jade blew her nose and sat up. “I’m too big to sit on your knee.”

  “Rubbish.” Kezia hugged her again. “You’re never too big to need someone to hold you while you get the sad out.”

  Jade sniffed and slanted a glance at her. “It’s not all out though.” She scrunched the tissues into sodden balls. “Mum’s taking me back to Auckland with her—but I don’t wanna go, I don’t!”

  Hurt for Ben, hurt for the Harlands, and hurt for her and Zoe punched into Kezia, stealing her breath. Wrench Jade away from her family? Allow her to leave with the carel
ess woman who’d abandoned her? Her heart howled, and she tightened her grip on Jade—then she realized the howl wasn’t only in her heart. Zoe had burst into noisy, sympathetic sobs, and Sparky pointed her muzzle to the ceiling, adding to the chorus.

  Kezia held out her other arm, and Zoe flung herself against her. The three of them clung together like shipwreck survivors, floating aimlessly with no rescue on the horizon. What could she say? I’ll fix this, Jade. I won’t let anyone take you away from your daddy, from your family. Empty words. A promise she badly wanted to make but couldn’t.

  “I’m sorry, Jade. We’ll miss you so much, and I know your Gran and aunties will too. And your daddy will miss you most of all—” Kezia’s voice cracked.

  Tough-guy persona aside, Ben would be shattered at losing his daughter.

  Jade hiccupped and scrubbed her wrist under her nose. “No, that’s the only good thing. Dad’s coming with us. He and Mum are getting married.”

  The meaning of the girl’s words disintegrated into empty syllables for a moment, then boomeranged, slamming into her—clawing, shredding, hollowing her out. Oh, dear God in heaven, no! Kezia squeezed her eyes shut and her stomach went into free-fall.

  Ben knocked on Kezia’s front door, hoping for an anvil to drop out of the sky or a stray lightning bolt to strike him down. Anything to put him out of his misery.

  What in the hell was he going to say?

  The door swung open, and time stopped ticking past. The kaka perched on the fence ceased squawking, the distant hiss of the sea faded. His tongue glued itself to the roof of his mouth, and he simply stared. Even with a sprinkling of flour in her curls, Kezia was still so goddamned beautiful he wanted nothing more than to snatch her up and hold on. He’d beg to be her teddy bear or chew-toy—whatever she needed. Whatever he had to do to figure things out.

  “I called your house. Marci answered.” Her hand resting on the door edge tightened. “I told her Jade was safe here, and she said you were already on your way.”

  “Yep.” A rerun of his brilliant conversational skills.

  He glanced over his shoulder. The kaka cocked its head, watching him, watching his whole world unravel.

  “The girls are out back feeding burned scones to the birds.”

  His pulse jumped. “You don’t burn things.”

  “No.” Her smile was tight, thin, and so unlike her normal heart-in-her-eyes grin that he forgot to breathe. “Finding out my lover is going to marry someone else distracted me.”

  “Jade heard. Shit.”

  “She heard enough to run to me with a broken heart about leaving Oban. Part of me wasn’t surprised.” She cocked her head, much like the kaka—curious, indifferent. Yet he couldn’t believe she didn’t care, not with her red-rimmed eyes and fence-post straight spine. “Now, you and Marci getting married? That I never saw coming.”

  “Well. She blindsided me too, I’m not—”

  She held up a palm. “You don’t have to explain.”

  “I do.” He considered it crucial that she understand he didn’t want Marci. That even the idea of sharing any part of his life and future with her, made him nauseated.

  Ben cleared the distance between them and grabbed her hand. “I didn’t ask Marci to marry me.”

  Her dark eyes widened and her breathing hitched.

  “She suggested it after telling me her so-called fiancé screwed her over for the boss’s daughter.”

  “She’s trying to make this man jealous?”

  “I don’t know. I hadn’t thought of that. She says she wants a man to take care of her and Jade while she studies full-time.” He stroked her hand, his thumb tracing delicate bones under chilled skin. “I tried ringing my lawyer on the way down. His answering service picked up, so I’ll have to wait until Monday. I’ll fight her, but it’s a crapshoot being awarded full custody…” Shaking his head, his gaze slipped to his scuffed boots.

  “You’d have to prove Marci’s an unfit mother. That’s tough.”

  “Yeah. And I hate the thought of Jade being in that woman’s care alone until I can get a court hearing.”

  “You can’t let her revert to that stricken little girl she was three months ago.”

  “No.”

  She squeezed his hand. “I’ll help with the lawyer fees.”

  His head jerked up.

  “We’ll find the best law—”

  He pulled out of her grasp and stepped back. “No, Goddammit. I can’t accept your charity again.”

  “Offering to help you and Jade is not charity, pig-headed man! Think of it as a loan if you have to.”

  “A loan I’ll never be able to repay. No.” He shook his head. “I won’t let you dip into Callum’s life insurance, especially when there’s no guarantee I’ll win. It’s Zoe’s money. Zoe’s. I won’t touch it.”

  At her wide eyes and trembling chin, Ben took Kezia’s hand again. “I don’t mean to be harsh. But I’ll take care of this. Jade’s my responsibility.”

  “So, what will you do now?” She sucked in a deep breath and straightened her shoulders.

  “I have no fucking idea.” Put his house on the market and hope for a buyer? Sell The Mollymawk, his only means of making a viable income on Stewart Island. But without his dive business, his days living in Oban were numbered.

  “Will you consider marrying her?”

  Seismic tremors ran through her words, cracking open a canyon between their feet. The canyon yawned open, a future filled with nothingness. No laughter, no warmth, no incredible sex that he now knew wasn’t just sex, but making love. No Kezia, no Zoe.

  Ben closed his eyes. Saw his too-silent, solemn little girl hiding from him in the garden. Saw her refusing to eat chocolate because her mother told her she’d get fat. Then he saw Jade perched on his back giggling as he completed ten push-ups and pretended to collapse. Saw them playing Secret Ninja and Cluedo and hide n’ seek, where he’d always find her first because his daughter never stopped laughing.

  Put her needs before your wants.

  Half-assed plans, worries, utter chaos screamed through his brain. He was stumbling along a shaky tightrope over that canyon, and he couldn’t seem to find his balance.

  “Who the hell knows what’ll happen? Maybe as a last resort.” The words tore from him, ruthlessly cut from his guts like a surgeon removing a cancerous growth.

  Kezia yanked away from him, throwing up her palms. “Gesù! How can you possibly think marrying her will work?”

  “I’d make it work, if it came to that. For Jade.” Couldn’t she understand there were no easy choices here? That he was being stretched in ten different directions, trapped in a pressure-cooking-time-bomb?

  “How could you let your daughter see you marry a woman you care nothing for? It’s wrong. Marriage is about love. Commitment. Partnership. Trust.”

  “Kezia—”

  She was right. Everything about marrying Marci was wrong. He was drowning in the wrongness, clutching at straws. Goddamn it, he had to consider every option though, no matter how sickening.

  “I can’t deal with this right now. Since it’s your decision, your responsibility, you need to sort this out with Marci.”

  “Kezia—I…” he tried again, but the girls appeared in the hallway behind her and the words choked in his throat.

  Jade’s gaze leaped to his, her brow crinkling. She froze and Zoe moved ahead of her—defending her against the wrath-of-Ben they probably both expected.

  “Hey, kiddo. Figured you’d be here.” He made sure his voice contained no trace of annoyance.

  “You’re not mad?” Jade squeaked from behind Zoe’s shoulder.

  “Nah. I knew you wouldn’t have gone far.” He ran a hand over his jaw and grimaced, catching a whiff of himself. Yeah, nervous sweat reeked. God, he needed a hot shower, a handful of aspirin—and a miracle.

  “Listen, we need to get going. You’ve got goodie bags to finish, and I’m not getting glitter all over my fingers doing them for you.”

&nb
sp; Jade smiled a wobbly smile. “I can still have a party?”

  Ben glanced at Kezia, but she’d turned away, the tiny sliver of her profile giving no indication of her thoughts. “Sure. You think I’m going to eat two pounds of cocktail sausages, six bags of potato chips, and a case of fizzy drinks by myself?”

  “And cupcakes,” said Zoe. “Don’t forget me and Mamma are making cupcakes. Everything’s better with cupcakes.”

  His head hurt, his eyes hurt, his chest hurt and he doubted any kind of cupcake would help. He gamely fixed a smile to his mouth. “Yeah, and cupcakes. C’mon then, Jade. Let’s go home.”

  Kezia stopped Jade for a quick hug, but she wouldn’t look at him as the girl stepped outside. They walked to the gate, and Sparky bounded around the side of the house. Jade clipped on her leash and picked her up.

  “Dad,” she said, as they trudged uphill.

  “Mmm?”

  “Wouldn’t you rather marry Kezia than Mum?” She kept her eyes downcast, her nose resting on the dog’s head.

  Sparky panted like a maniac and licked her chops, staring glassily ahead. A dog’s life was so much simpler.

  “It’s complicated.”

  Jade huffed out an impatient sigh. “Grown-ups always say ‘it’s complicated’ if they don’t want to answer a question.”

  “True.”

  She stopped in front of one of the neighbor’s fences, lowered Sparky to the ground, and looked him dead in the eyes. “You don’t like Mum the way you like Kezia.”

  Ben crouched in front of her. “I don’t really know your mum that well.”

  “So why do you want to marry her then?”

  He couldn’t tell her the truth. Some burdens a kid shouldn’t ever have to carry. “It’s complicated.”

  “Dad!”

  “Nobody’s marrying anybody at the moment. We’re trying to work something out—what’s best for you.”

  Jade folded her arms and stood hipshot, a cocky stance betrayed by her shiny eyes. “Do you want me to go back to Auckland with Mum?”

  “I don’t want you out of my sight for a second. I want to be there nagging you to brush your teeth. I want to tell you to get your dog off my bed, and I want to enjoy the continuing improvement of your coffee-making skills. You’ve grown on me, kiddo.”