Zoobreak

by Gordon Korman

  How could he explain that to the school nurse?

  She had a theory. “It’s almost as if you’re trying to sleep, but something is preventing you from letting go. Are you having bad dreams? I distinctly heard you say ‘ouch.’ ”

  “Well, I’m definitely not sleeping, so it can’t be dreams.”

  The nurse probed further. “How is your sleep at night?”

  Ben shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m asleep at the time.” But the truth was, the nights were okay, since Ferret Face slept then, too. The ferret liked to crawl all the way to the end of the bed and sleep under Ben’s feet. It was actually pretty comfortable — if you could ignore the fact that the room was starting to smell like All Aboard Animals. Mom had been giving him gentle reminders lately about using deodorant.

  The nurse sighed. “Well, if this continues, I’m going to have to get in touch with your pediatrician.”

  Ben swallowed hard. His doctor might not be as smart as the sleep experts at the DuPont Youth Academy for Sleep Science, but he would probably notice a ferret living inside his patient’s shirt.

  He could feel the walls of the Health Office closing in on him. He had to talk to Griffin.

  “Ah-choo!”

  Logan’s sneeze was completely unconvincing. He grimaced in annoyance. He was never going to get that allergy commercial if he couldn’t come up with a better sneeze than that. And then Logan Kellerman would never get to be as famous as Ferris Atwater, Jr., already was.

  Practice!

  “Ah-choo! Ah-choo! Ah-choo!”

  He was sneezing so loudly that he almost missed his mother’s scream. By the time he ran downstairs, she was on the phone, wide-eyed and ranting:

  “It’s the biggest rat I’ve ever seen in my life! Right in my basement! There’s no way those little mousetraps are going to work on this monster! Bring a shotgun!”

  Heart sinking, Logan opened the door and peered down the cellar stairs. It was too dark to make out much detail, but the beaver’s eyes burned up out of the gloom, red and wild.

  He had a giddy vision of the coverall-clad exterminator coming up out of the basement. “Mrs. Kellerman, you don’t have rats; you’ve got beavers. And turtles and salamanders and frogs. In fact, you’ve got a lot of stuff that disappeared off that zoo boat. And your son bears a striking resemblance to Ferris Atwater, Jr.!”

  This called for drastic action. As soon as his mom hung up the phone and left the room, he pounced on the handset and hit redial.

  “Cedarville Pest Control,” came a voice on the other end.

  “Hi. Did you just get a call from the Kellerman house, 414 DeWitt? I’m calling to cancel. It was all a misunderstanding. It wasn’t a rat. It was a stuffed otter. Sorry for the mix-up. Don’t come.”

  Man, that was close! Logan didn’t want to think about what might have happened if he hadn’t been home.

  But an hour later, he was experimenting with different combinations of pepper and smelling salts, looking for the perfect sneeze, when he heard his mother on the phone again.

  “Where are you people? You said right away! … Cancel? Of course I didn’t cancel! Why would I cancel? There’s a rat downstairs that could eat my children! Come now!”

  And when Logan called to nix the appointment yet again, the exterminator was so angry that he vowed he would refuse to come to the Kellerman house even if there was a T. rex chewing on the roof shingles.

  Logan let out a breath. He was safe — for now. But there were other exterminators in other towns. Mom wasn’t going to let this lie. They had to get rid of the animals. And fast!

  Cleopatra was the first to sense that something was not right. She danced nervously around the kitchen, swinging on the cabinet knobs, chattering in agitation.

  “What is it, Cleo?” Savannah asked. “What’s wrong?”

  Ding-dong.

  The monkey jumped into Savannah’s arms and clung there, trembling.

  “Come on, sweetie, we’ll see who it is.”

  She threw the front door wide open. There stood Mr. Nastase and Klaus.

  “I knew it!” the zookeeper exclaimed in triumph. “I knew I’d find Eleanor here!”

  Savannah slammed the door in their faces. “Dad!”

  In a split second, Mr. Drysdale was at her side. He opened the door again. “Is there any reason why you two are trespassing on our property?”

  “That monkey was stolen from my zoo!” Mr. Nastase said coldly.

  “I’ll tell you what you told our lawyer a couple of weeks ago,” said Mr. Drysdale. “All capuchins look alike, and you can’t prove this one is yours. My daughter’s pet was lost, and now she’s home. That’s all that matters here.”

  “Your daughter is a criminal,” the zookeeper accused. “She was part of a group of juvenile delinquents who broke into my zoo and stole forty valuable animals!”

  Mr. Drysdale was blown away. “Who do you think she is — Jesse James? Savannah and her friends are eleven years old! They’re no more capable of pulling off what happened at your zoo than they are of flying to the moon!”

  “The kid who attacked me was half the size of her,” rumbled Klaus.

  “Look,” said Mr. Drysdale, “we’re animal lovers. We have a lot of pets. But don’t you think I’d notice if there were forty extras around?”

  “That depends” — Mr. Nastase’s mustache was nearly two parallel lines — “on how hard you look at what’s right under your nose!” He reached for the capuchin in Savannah’s arms.

  Cleopatra let out a shriek of terror.

  With a woof that shook the very foundations of the house, a large, dark shape leaped over the fence from the backyard. By the time Luthor’s big paws hit the grass, he was in full flight, bounding up the front walk to come to the aid of his dearest friend.

  Klaus caught sight of the Doberman first. He picked up Mr. Nastase and hoisted him away from the front door. A heartbeat later, Luthor landed on that very spot.

  “Run, boss!”

  The two took off out of the yard and down the street. If Savannah hadn’t called off her dog, Luthor would have pursued them to the ends of the earth.

  The zookeeper and his security man were still running when they reached their rental car. They threw themselves inside and locked the doors.

  “Thank you for that quick thinking, Klaus!” Mr. Nastase panted. “I can’t believe they sicced that monster on us!”

  “I think the monkey did that!” Klaus gasped. “It was her voice that brought the dog.”

  Still shaken, the zookeeper opened his window. The angry barking had stopped. “The coast is clear.”

  Klaus looked puzzled. “I thought Eleanor would be happy to be rescued. But she seemed pretty comfortable with the kid.”

  Mr. Nastase was disgusted. “A dumb animal is comfortable with anybody who feeds it.”

  “We used to feed her,” Klaus pointed out, “but she sure didn’t like it when you got too close. Those people have it wrong, huh? You definitely didn’t steal her?”

  “Of course not. I bought her from a reputable animal dealer.”

  “Yeah, but how did the dealer get her?” Klaus probed.

  The zookeeper was annoyed. “Your job, Klaus, is security — which you might have done better, since all our exhibits are gone. You let me worry about the animals. I know everything there is to know about each and every one of them.”

  From the waterfowl pond in the park next to the Drysdale home, the loon yodeled its distinctive mournful call.

  “Filthy pigeons,” Mr. Nastase commented. “Rats with wings.”

  24

  When Griffin arrived at school the next morning, the sight that met his eyes nearly stopped his heart. There, seated in the glassed-in outer office, was Mr. Nastase.

  Oh, no!

  Since the zoobreak, the one thing that had been going in their favor was the fact that the search for the missing animals was taking place in Connecticut. But now Mr. Nasty had found Cedarville. And Dr. Alford and her bab
oons were not due back for another eight days.

  Don’t panic, Griffin told himself. It’s just him; no cops. He doesn’t know anything for sure.

  When he found the note in his locker, he was certain it was his summons to the office for a face-to-face grilling by the zookeeper. But it wasn’t from the principal. He unfolded the paper and read:

  EMERGENCY MEETING!

  THE BALLROOM! NOW!

  The ballroom was Coach Nimitz’s graveyard for all the broken balls and equipment he couldn’t bring himself to throw in the garbage. Griffin headed down the hallway behind the gym and slipped into the storage room. They were all there, up to their knees in flattened sports gear — Savannah, Pitch, Logan, Melissa, and Ben.

  Griffin addressed his best friend first. “I was wondering why I didn’t see you on the way to school.”

  Ben looked contrite. “Sorry to gang up on you, Griffin, but everybody agrees. We’ve got to get rid of the animals before it’s too late.”

  Griffin nodded in resignation. “I was going to call a meeting anyway. Mr. Nasty is in the principal’s office.”

  “Forget that!” Savannah was close to the edge. “He was at my house yesterday! Griffin, he knows!”

  “He suspects,” Griffin amended. “But remember — that’s Nastase in the office, not the police. He doesn’t want the cops nosing around because he doesn’t want it to come out that he stole Cleopatra in the first place.”

  “Are you saying that we’re safe?” Pitch asked incredulously.

  “No,” Griffin admitted. “When he finds out exactly where the animals are, and who’s got them, that’s when he’ll go to the cops — when it’s an open-and-shut case and we’re the crooks, not him. That means there’s still time.”

  “No!” The word was spoken with such force that no one believed it had come from quiet, shy Melissa. “Please! No more time! My baby brother is afraid of stuffed animals because one of them moved! My mother found an egg in my slippers! It can’t go on!”

  “Amen to that!” said Logan. “I can’t call every exterminator on Long Island and tell them my mother’s crazy!”

  “We got our electric bill,” Ben put in. “It was over seven hundred dollars! My family’s going broke just to keep the sauna running for the chuckwalla!”

  “Our garage is starting to smell like a barn,” Pitch complained.

  “I hear you,” Griffin said sadly. “I’m having problems, too, you know. The meerkat tunneled into Mrs. Abernathy’s vegetable garden. Lucky for us the cops thought she was reporting a ‘mere cat’ rather than a ‘meerkat.’ That was a close one.”

  “Well, what are you going to do about it?” Pitch demanded. “Sooner or later we’re going to run out of these lucky breaks.”

  “We need a plan,” Griffin concluded. “Something that gets the animals out of our hair and into a safe place until Dr. Alford comes back from baboon shopping.”

  Savannah was depressed. “It sounds great, but it’s not so simple. These are living creatures. They need to be cared for, fed, and exercised. The predators have to be separated from the prey. They make noises and smells. We’ll never find a place like that.”

  “Not without starting our own zoo,” Pitch agreed glumly.

  And suddenly, The Man With The Plan was living up to his name.

  “That’s it!” he exclaimed. “A second zoobreak! We broke them out of one zoo — we’ll break them into another! We’ll take them to the Long Island Zoo, and they’ll be waiting there when Dr. Alford gets back!”

  Ben was appalled. “Are you crazy? That’s no little paddleboat with cages they bought at Wal-Mart! That’s a real zoo with real security!”

  Savannah looked thoughtful and hopeful at the same time. “You know — I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but Dr. Alford once took me there when it was shut down for the night. The buildings are locked electronically.” She looked meaningfully at Melissa. “It’s all run by computer from the main office.”

  “I’ll do anything!” Melissa promised. “Just so I can have my bedroom back!”

  “And my basement,” Logan put in.

  “And my garage,” added Pitch.

  Ben was bitter. “You don’t think I want my sauna back? And to wear a shirt that doesn’t have a ferret in it? But this is crazy! You push the wrong button, and you could send a herd of elephants stampeding down the Long Island Expressway!”

  “We’ll be careful,” Savannah promised. “Don’t you see? This is the best idea in the world! We’re saved!”

  “Not yet,” Pitch said grimly. “How are we going to get there? That zoo must be ten miles away. We can’t bike there carrying all the animals. And it’s not near the water, so a boat doesn’t help us.”

  A slow smile replaced Griffin’s worried expression — the smile that said the new plan was beginning to take shape.

  Mr. Nastase and Klaus were sharing a Formica table at Mr. Pizza Guy when the waitress set a basket down between them.

  “What’s this?” the zookeeper asked, frowning.

  “Cheezie Stix.”

  “We didn’t order anything else,” Klaus told her.

  She grinned. “Compliments of the young gentleman at the counter.”

  Darren Vader swiveled on his stool and fired off a snappy salute.

  “Man,” said Klaus under his breath, “is this kid for real?”

  Darren left the counter and joined them at their table, helping himself to a Cheezie Stik as he sat down. “Darren Vader,” he introduced himself. “I have a business proposition. I set out an owl trap a couple of days ago. Interested to see if I caught anything?”

  Klaus’s hand shot up from beneath the table, grabbed Darren’s elbow, and squeezed. “You’re some piece of work, trying to sell us back our own animals!”

  “Hey, that hurts!”

  Mr. Nastase leaned into the boy’s face. “Now I have a proposition for you. Why don’t we go down to the police station, and you tell them what other traps you’ve set?”

  Darren gulped. “It’s just the owl! Honest!”

  Mr. Nastase’s civilized veneer faded as his temper rose. “I wasn’t born yesterday, kid! I know you’re mixed up with Savannah Drysdale and Ferris Atwater, Jr., and the gang of delinquents who emptied my zoo!”

  “I’m not!” Darren quavered.

  Klaus squeezed harder.

  “Okay, I was part of the team at first, but I didn’t go! I couldn’t get out that night! I really did use an owl trap! I bought it on eBay! I’ll show you the receipt!”

  “I’ve got a better idea, Darren Vader,” said the zookeeper. “You can show me the owl. And then you can tell me where to find the rest of my animals.”

  “Aren’t you going to pay me anything?” Darren pleaded.

  “Certainly,” Mr. Nastase agreed. “If you help me get my zoo back, I will reward you by not telling the police that you’re the one who robbed my place of business.”

  Darren was horrified. “But I’m innocent!”

  “Possibly. But who will believe it when they see you have my owl?”

  “That’s not fair!” Darren wailed.

  “Life isn’t fair,” the zookeeper commiserated. “But it can be bearable — if you cooperate.”

  Poor Darren could not understand how things had gone so terribly wrong. He had come here with a valuable owl to sell, and Mr. Nastase had managed to turn everything against him. All he could do was nod miserably. He didn’t dare speak for fear he would dig himself an even deeper hole.

  Mr. Nastase nibbled triumphantly on a Cheezie Stik. “You’ve got twenty-four hours to find out where your former associates are hiding my animals.” He smacked his lips. “These are really good.”

  25

  OPERATION ZOOBREAK II

  DATE: Wednesday, April 15

  TIME: midnight sharp

  INSTRUCTIONS: bring cargo, SECURELY PACKED, to the meeting point for transport to Long Island Zoo

  There was a knock at the door. “Ben?” came Mr. Slovak�
�s voice. “Can I come in?”

  “Just a minute, Dad.” Ben stuffed Ferret Face into his closet along with his printout of tomorrow night’s plan. He opened the door to admit his father. “What’s up?”

  “I have some news.” Mr. Slovak’s expression was solemn. “DuPont Academy just called. There’s a place opening up for you in ten days.”

  Ben had known this was coming, but he hadn’t expected to be so devastated by the reality. He told himself he ought to be happy. He was going to be safe in New Jersey, where there were no zoobreaks, either into or out of captivity. He should have been relieved that at least the suspense was over — no more sword dangling above his head. Instead, all he thought about was a boarding school he didn’t want to go to, far away from everything he knew and cared about, far away from his best friend. Being shanghaied into his second zoobreak in a week now seemed like a minor inconvenience compared with that.

  He took a deep breath. “Okay. So what do I have to do?”

  “Nothing right away,” Mr. Slovak replied sympathetically. “I just wanted to let you know it was coming. And by the way, the school nurse called. She says your nap habits have changed, and she wants you to see Dr. Patterson.”

  Ben sighed. “Sure, why not?” After tomorrow night, Ferret Face would be history, and he would be back to normal … or, at least, normal for a kid with narcolepsy.

  When his father left, Ben opened the closet door. “All right, Ferret Face. The coast is clear.” He stared. The ferret was chewing on the plan for Zoobreak II! He made a grab for the paper, but the agile creature darted underneath his hand and out into the bedroom.

  “Give me that!” he hissed. He took a flying leap onto his bed, but the ferret scooted just out of his grasp. It scrambled across the pillow and jumped back down to the carpet. As it passed the open window, a strong breeze tore the page from its mouth and tossed it into the yard.

  “Now look what you’ve done!” A live plan blowing around the neighborhood — Griffin would have a heart attack.