Stronger

by Blue Ashcroft

  “What’s that?” The bearded giant says, reaching for it. “Yearbook? You a high schooler?”

  I see an out. “Yes.”

  He opens it. “Happy graduation. Looks like not.” He grins at me. He has nice teeth for a pig. On another occasion, maybe I could be more civil, but this just isn’t going well. I reach for it and he holds it up where I can’t reach, a grin on his face. I turn away with a ‘hmph’. I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of jumping for it. I’m not a dog.

  The other man comes forward, lips pressed in a line. He’s tall and thin, with a shaved head and huge arms that bulge out of his oversized sleeveless tee. Classy.

  Omg, Geoff is right. I’m a snob. I’m a snob even in the worst situations. I should be afraid, and yelling for my life, not critiquing someone’s fashion. But they’re so much less threatening than Mike, and maybe I’m numbed to it.

  Geoff’s head appears at the doorway, over the crowd. His eyes are concerned, and he’s obviously not happy to see me here.

  I can’t help feeling relief when I see him. “Oh, I’m here to see someone,” I say to the man approaching. “He’s just over there. I’ll go now.”

  But he blocks me off, and shaved head dude looks much meaner than the bearded giant, who is now watching both of us and slowly lowering the year book.

  “You called me a pig,” he says, reaching for my face. I back up and the motorcycle dude behind me shoves me forward into his hands. He grabs my shoulders and stares down into my face. His eyes are red and a bit bleary looking. Drunk maybe? I struggle against his hands but they’re like iron, so I decide to wait it out. Geoff will be over here soon. Hopefully I can apologize and extricate myself before he’s needed.

  I look back to the doorway, and don’t see Geoff’s face anymore. “I need to go in, I’m meeting someone.”

  “You said you didn’t have a boyfriend,” the man holding me says. “And you don’t just get to talk shit in my face and get away with it.”

  “Hey man, ease up a bit,” the bearded dude says. I’m liking him more and more. Maybe he was just going to fight the other guy because he thought the shaved head dude was going to be disrespectful. “I mean, we still haven’t decided who gets first try.”

  My face pales. What the hell is a first try? My claws come out and I’m all ready to scratch both of their faces off when Geoff finally materializes out of the crowd, walking towards us with a relaxed gait, hands clenching at his sides.

  He walks past thing one, taps thing two on the shoulder, and punches him through the face. Not on, through. Thing two releases my shoulders and flies to the side, into the gravel. I look down in shock and see him come up, spitting mad.

  Geoff doesn’t miss a beat, sliding in smoothly to put an arm around my waist and kiss me hard on the mouth. He pushes me towards the door. “Oh good, you’re finally here, babe.” I rankle at his possession, at being called babe, but he glares at me, silently forcing me to go along with it.

  Like I deserve it, simply for showing up at a place I have every human right to show up at. And I came here just to show him something that would help him too. The nerve. I brush off my arm, and send a last glare at bearded thing one, who’s grinning stupidly and looking away, and thing two, who’s arguing with Geoff about ‘his bitch’.

  Neanderthals. Screw Geoff, I should never have come. I get to the entrance and the crowd moves. Oh, so now it’s different, because I’m with Geoff?

  Logan grabs me through the arm and pulls me in, and I follow him wordlessly to a table in the corner where another guy in a beanie is sitting on a stool drinking a beer.

  “You shouldn’t have done that,” Logan says, going to the window. “Brent, you might need to back him up.”

  “Back who up?” I say, going to the window. “Why?” Thing two is on his feet, pointing his finger in Geoff’s face. He’s taller, but Geoff is bigger, and they’re circling. “What is going on?”

  “It’s a guy thing,” Brent says. “You obviously don’t get guys, or you wouldn’t be here alone at night.”

  “I had to see Geoff,” I say indignantly. “I should be able to go where I want.”

  He shrugs. “Yeah, if you want the consequences. Ooh, Geoff’s gonna kill him.”

  “Kill him?” The thought shakes me out of my feminist indignation. “Why?”

  “Geoff’s kind of a mad dog when he fights. And that guy is just looking for a fight.”

  Uh oh. I watch Geoff and thing two circle, and I don’t like it. “So stupid, fighting over me.”

  “It’s not about you anymore. Sometimes guys just gotta fight.”

  “That’s so stupid,” I say.

  “Agreed,” Logan says demurely. “But it’s how it works.”

  “Why?” I ask, but then Geoff throws a fist at thing two and thing two’s head snaps back hard. “Never mind, don’t answer that, I’ve gotta stop him.”

  “Amy, wait,” Logan calls, but I run out before he can catch me.

  I’m small and can duck through the crowd. I run towards Geoff and it feels like the world is slowing as I see a punch coming straight for my face. I don’t even know who is throwing it. I just know I can’t let Geoff lose control and kill anyone, not when it’s at least partially my fault. I throw up my hands to cover my face but the punch doesn’t come. Instead, Geoff grabs me, pulls me back, and takes the punch to his own face. He shoves me aside as he goes to the ground.

  Thing two grabs for me and I go crazy, scratching at his face like a scratching machine, and he backs up, hands out, looking at the other guys. I make scratching motions at them, too, and thing one starts to laugh.

  How dare he.

  “All right kitty cat, go in with your tom.”

  Oh. My. Gosh. I hate all men!

  Geoff pushes up off his knees and makes as if he’s going to hit thing two. Thing two moves back, shaking his head. Geoff spits in his direction, a manly move for sure, and walks me past thing one, taking a moment to send him a glare.

  “Sorry, man,” thing one says, handing him my book. “Didn’t know she was with someone.”

  I start to speak up, because it shouldn’t matter if I’m with someone, but Geoff silences me with a punishing kiss, and then glares at thing one again. “She is, so remember that, jackass.”

  He pushes me in the door in front of him, and I can tell by Logan and Brent’s faces as they look at Geoff over my shoulder that I’m about to be in trouble.

  Oh, joy.

  Chapter 10

  I walk forward to a stool across from Brent and sit down, keeping my eyes on the floor, not wanting to face Geoff for some reason.

  I’m not the one who should feel bad here, though. I didn’t do anything wrong.

  I peek up timidly to gauge the temperature of the room. Geoff is standing at the head of the pool table, arms tightly folded, a dark glare on his face. When his eyes meet mine, he opens his mouth, then shuts it. Like he doesn’t know what to say, or he’s too angry to say anything.

  His head is bleeding, matting the hair on his right side, but he’s ignoring it. The hit he took for me because I got in the middle of things.

  “You’re bleeding,” I murmur.

  Geoff brings one hand up to touch the side of his head. He pulls it back and looks at the blood on his hand. “Oh.”

  “Let me—” I start to stand, because I want to go to the bar and get a napkin, but his glare pins me back to the stool.

  He grabs a napkin on his own and presses it to his head, eyes still on me.

  Brent takes a drink and looks off to the side. Logan studies Geoff warily. We all just wait.

  Geoff sets down the napkin at the side of the pool table. Ew.

  My lips are still tingling from where he kissed me, rough and possessive. Who knew I’d like it like that? Punishing, hard. He called me his. That was weirdly rewarding.

  Outside people are now just talking and dispersing, and some are straddling bikes, and some are drinking.

  “What were you think
ing?” Geoff asks finally, grabbing a stool of his own and perching on it.

  “I—” I suck in my cheeks. “I had something to show you. Something you’d want to see.”

  He exhales in a growl, rubbing his knees and leaning forward. “It could have waited, you shouldn’t have come here alone at night.”

  “Well, that’s ridiculous. Because I’m a girl?”

  “No, because you’re a moron. I wouldn’t come here alone.”

  “Well, I knew you’d be here.”

  “You should have called me over. This isn’t the right place for you.”

  “Again, because I’m a girl?”

  He frowns and his glare intensifies. He looks hot when he’s pissed. “No, because you have the street smarts of a, a, I don’t know. You have zero street smarts. A girl like Camille, she could have come over. She would have known how to do it. You charged in insulting people.”

  “I—”

  “Geoff, come on, she didn’t know,” Logan says.

  “And you,” Geoff yells, turning to Logan with a much harsher voice than he used on me. “What were you thinking, letting her interfere in my fight?”

  “Well, on the plus side, I could get you that free dinner. We could all go.” Logan comes over to me and puts a hand on my shoulder. “I mean, I’m sure that was scary for Amy too. Shook her up.”

  Geoff’s frown deepens further. It’s like nothing can make him happy right now. “Why did you even come, anyway?”

  I clutch the yearbook, not sure if he even deserves the information I was here to deliver anymore. “I told you, I had something important.”

  He comes forward, stalking like a panther, dark eyes glowing. He points a finger in my face, an offensive move that bring out the bitch in me. “Don’t you ever, EVER interfere in my fights.”

  “Well, my bad. I’m sorry. I guess I should have just let you kill someone and go to jail, before you even find Camille’s rapist.”

  Brent and Logan’s eyes widen at my words.

  Geoff’s face softens a little in confusion. “Kill someone? Why would I have killed someone?”

  Brent coughs. “That was my fault. I said you were gonna kill the guy. I didn’t mean it literally.”

  Geoff turns to the side, giving me his sharp, angular profile. A vein twitches in his neck. “Shit.” He turns back to me, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand in an abashed motion. “Well, I guess I can see how you thought that, given what I said the other night.”

  “You told her about Camille?” Brent asks, setting down his drink and folding his arms to study me closer for the first time. His green eyes look me over in a way that makes me uncomfortable, like he’s seeing too much.

  “Yeah,” Geoff says. “She’s one of Knight’s friends. Camille went to one of her parties.”

  Brent’s eyes widen slightly, and he looks over at Logan, who returns a look I can’t interpret.

  “Anyway, this is guys’ night,” Geoff says. “Can’t I have some time on my own?”

  My heart sinks. I didn’t know I’d just be a burden by coming. I thought he enjoyed hanging out with me as much I as enjoyed hanging out with him.

  “Wow,” Logan says, coming to put an arm around me. “What an ass. I’m willing to ditch guy’s night for you.”

  It makes me smile and keeps the angry tears that were forming from building any further. Brent takes Logan’s cue and comes over, putting his arm around me also.

  “Yeah, what kind of dude would hang out with dudes over a cute chick like this?”

  I blush and push away. “I think you’re all misunderstanding something. I’m not here to ‘hang out’. There’s something I had to show Geoff.”

  I shove the book into Geoff’s arms and try to exit out the front, but Geoff chucks the pool cue to the floor and catches me around the arms, pinning them at my sides.

  “Now hold on a minute, Dollface. I don’t think you want to go out there just yet.”

  I take a deep breath. His grip is like iron, and he can’t tell me what to do. But he is bleeding because of me, so I have to admit he might be right, even though the last thing I want right now is to be in his company.

  Maybe my parents are right about staying where I belong. I hate boxes, but maybe I belong in one. Maybe it’s not as exciting to get out of them as I hoped it would be.

  Geoff lets me go when he sees I’m not going to head out. He rubs my arms once, gently. “You okay Dollface?”

  A coughing noise erupts from Brent and Logan’s direction. The tall, lanky man and the shorter, rougher, beanie-clad man are holding each other, erupting in silent laughter.

  “What?” Geoff says, stomping over.

  “Dollface?” Logan says, wiping away tears. “You’ve got to be joking.”

  “It fits,” Geoff says. “She likes it.”

  “In that case,” Brent says, passing him to put a hand around my waist, “can we call you that?”

  I push his arm off and see approval in Geoff’s face. “No. I don’t think so. Don’t touch me.”

  I’m getting irritated. “Stop treating me like I’m some rare object.”

  “You are a rare object,” Logan says, still composing himself. “I mean, no girls around here would want to walk in alone at night, not through that crowd. What did you say to make them so mad?”

  “I called them, uh, I called them pigs.”

  Logan and Brent burst into laughter again, but Geoff gets a serious look on his face and comes over to me.

  He’s so tall and broad, compared to me, that when he looks down, even when it’s with a patient expression, it’s a little threatening and intimidating. “Dollface, you can’t talk to people like that,” he says, scratching the back of his neck.

  “But they were being pigs. They were going to fight over who talked to me.”

  “So they’re different than you. That’s how they do things maybe.” He scratches his neck again, then realizes he’s doing it and grimaces and stops. “I guess it’s my fault, for letting you call me Neanderthal, but Amy, it’s really offensive.”

  “So I should be gentle with boorish men?”

  “No, but I don’t think you should pick fights with them.”

  “I wasn’t picking a fight.”

  He puts a hand up to his face and closes his eyes while he pinches the bridge of his nose. He sighs. “That’s the thing, you were. Just because people act differently than you, doesn’t mean they don’t have feelings. And the fight thing, that’s mostly posturing. No one even got hurt until you came out and interfered.”

  “Well, I couldn’t let you—”

  “Amy, like you honestly could have stopped me,” he says. “Look, these guys grew up different than you. They didn’t have parents that took them to soccer lessons, or harp lessons. They didn’t have much to do. None of us did. We hung out, watched TV, and yeah, fought sometimes. Money is entertainment, and none of us had much of that.”

  I nod, thinking it over. If he’s like them, then how can he put it so succinctly, see so clearly the difference between them and me? It’s like he’s hiding something.

  “And we don’t deserve to be called names. Not to mention, making people bigger than you, tougher than you, angry is never a good idea. Girl or guy.”

  “I’m sorry,” I say, finally realizing how stupid I’ve been. How much trouble I’ve put Geoff through. “I’ll just go now, if you’ll walk me out.”

  “Okay,” he says gruffly, following me to the door. He slips an arm around my waist and pulls me close.

  “And another thing,” I whisper to him as we go out past a group of glaring men. “Why did it not matter when I said I wasn’t interested, but it does matter if they think I’m with you?”

  He smiles slightly and opens my door for me, keeping me out of sight of the others as I get in. “It’s just a guy thing, Dollface.”

  “Well, I’m sorry I caused you trouble,” I say. I realize I left the yearbook inside, but I guess that’s for the best, because he’ll want
to see it. “My yearbook’s in there. Page 95 should interest you.”

  He raises an eyebrow, then looks like he’s going to say something, but I pull the door closed and start the car. I don’t want to talk to him anymore. I feel confused, and humiliated, and embarrassed by the problems I’ve caused.

  And maybe mostly, I’m hurt that he was so mad that I came, that he had to go out of his way for me. I hadn’t expected that.

  As I pull away, I can see him in the rearview mirror, standing there, a blocky silhouette, folding his arms, dark hair lifting slightly in the wind.

  It’s an image that sticks with me as I drive home.

  Geoff

  “Shit man, that was harsh,” Logan says, running a hand through his thinning dark hair. Poor kid is only in his twenties.

  “Didn’t have to chase her off,” Brent says. “Damn, she was hot. Don’t see many like that around here.”

  “Like what?” I ask, not wanting the answer. I’m grumpy because the adrenaline is starting to wear off. What does she know about adrenaline, about fighting, about anything? How could she get in my way like that? Did she not trust me to even handle a little fight like that? My head aches, and I bring my hand up to see if it’s still bleeding. It is, a bit.

  “Bring her around more often,” Brent says. “I like her.”

  “First tell me what about her is so different from other girls around here.”

  Brent thinks for a minute, setting his drink down on one knee of his ragged jeans. “Innocent. Yeah, really innocent. In a kinda funny way. Don’t get me wrong, I love the chicks around here, but she’s more entertaining. And she’s pretty, too.”

  I bite the inside of my cheek. It’s true but I don’t like other people noticing. I haven’t even gotten her in the sack yet. Given, now that I know her I’m not sure if that’s ever in the cards for us, but that’s probably why I get so angry when Brent and Logan talk about her.

  Or when she gets herself and me into trouble by doing dumb shit. I sigh. She’s so stupid about men that it’s almost scary. No wonder she attracted a creep like Mike.

  No, that’s not fair. No chick deserves that. But creeps can just like sniff that stuff out. Girls who are too nice to say no, girls who are too polite.