by Leah Brooke
Shaking her head, her mother got to her feet, moving slowly around the small cabin. “I’d give anything to have the love of one man, and you’ve got three. A home of your own.”
Wiping away a tear, her mother nodded. “I’ll take some of that gold, if you don’t mind. I’m real happy that you’ve got security.” Grinning, she shook her head again, appearing more relaxed than Sarah had even seen her look. “Three husbands. Amazing. You’ve got three men to look after you and keep you safe—three strong, fearless men who’d risk their life for you.”
Sarah gulped, glancing toward the window. “I know. It’s a little scary.”
It was also very humbling.
Her mother smiled and lowered herself to sit on the bed next to her. “You should have seen them. They were so scared.”
Sarah traced a pattern on the sheet. “I thought they wanted me to leave. Phoenix got shot because of me. I thought they blamed me for bringing trouble to the ranch.”
Her mother surprised her by throwing her head back and laughing. “Doesn’t look to me like they’re the type to hide behind a woman’s skirts. Nope. Those men’ll meet trouble head on and enjoy the hell out of it.”
She’d never forget how they’d looked when they’d ridden off to confront Willy and his gang, and knew that her mother was right. Blowing out a breath, she moved to a more comfortable position. “They looked so hard and cold when they rode out, like completely different men.” Smiling, she leaned back with a sigh, missing her husbands. At least one of them had been with her at all times since she’d been shot, and had only started leaving her alone to spend some time with her mother, Savannah, and Maggie. “They’ve been nothing but gentle with me. I never dreamed they could be so dangerous. I heard what they did to Willy and his men.”
“Without even breaking a sweat. None of them started sweating until they saw you fall.” Her mother smiled, turning from where she’d been staring out the window. Although the bruises on her face had faded, Sarah knew she’d never forget them.
“Oh, baby, every man I’ve met since coming here is dangerous—the good kind of dangerous.” Laughing softly, her mother braced herself against the wall, sighing as she leaned her head against the window. Her laughter stopped, but she wore a satisfied smile and a faraway look in her eyes that kept Sarah silent. “Such good men, and so kind to women. Even to me.”
Struck by the look of peace and contentment that seemed to erase the harsh lines on her mother’s face, Sarah just watched her, amazed that her mother looked at least ten years younger. She’d never seen her mother look so beautiful.
Her mother stood in silence for several long minutes before turning, her smile widening. “To know that you’re happy and settled means the world to me. If your offer’s still open, I have a chance to start over. It’s more than I could have ever hoped for—for both of us.”
Straightening, she smiled again as if she couldn’t stop smiling, moving to the bed and sitting next to Sarah. She took Sarah’s hand in hers in a motherly gesture that brought back happy memories that Sarah had long ago forgotten.
As a little girl, she’d play with her mother’s sparkly jewelry and colorful feathers that she wore in her hair, while her mother looked on with a smile, a smile she hadn’t seen in too many years.
Until now.
“Your men are real men—strong enough to handle any trouble that comes along, and secure enough in themselves to let you see how much they love you. I’ve heard about men like them all my life, but I’ve never met any. To know that you’re surrounded by them, and have three of them who would die—or kill—for you makes anything seem possible. A new life for both of us.”
Patting Sarah’s hand, her mother rose again as if the excitement shining in her eyes made it impossible for her to sit still. “California! Thank you so much for makin’ it possible for me to start over. Now that you’re on the mend, I’m gonna go. Your men have put up with me long enough, and Duke said he’s goin’ to town tomorrow for more supplies. I heard Mrs. Tyler talking her husbands into goin’ to town, too.”
Shaking her head, her mother clasped her hands and laughed again. “Both of those men gave in to her and agreed to take her and the baby to town with Duke. I think they want to show off the baby. I’ll tell you, girl, you sure ended up in an amazing place.”
Chapter Fifteen
Sitting on the small front porch of the cabin she shared with her husbands, Sarah thought about her mother’s words as she looked up from the skirt she’d started hemming.
The sight of Phoenix approaching, brushing dirt from his chaps, filled her with a longing that seemed to grow stronger each day.
As soon as she lifted her face, he smiled at her, a grin that made her pulse leap even from several yards away.
Smiling, she sat back and admired his purposeful walk, her smile falling when he suddenly frowned.
“Are you allowed to be out here?” He took the stairs to the small porch two at a time to crouch beside her chair. “Shouldn’t you be in bed?”
Setting her sewing aside, she reached out a hand to him, her heart lurching when he took it in his and sat at her feet. “The doctor said that I’m doing fine, and that he wants me to start moving more. He said fresh air would do me good. Besides, I’m bored and I want to see what’s going on. I’ve been watching you trying to break that horse all morning. Are you all right?”
His hand slid up her leg to the exact spot the bullet had struck her thigh. “I’m fine. How about you? What did the doc say exactly?”
His tone and the warning gleam in his eyes told her that she’d better not lie to him.
She leaned forward, thrilled at his kiss, but humbled when he laid his head gently on her lap. Running her fingers through his hair, she smiled. “He said that I’m healing nicely. He wants me to move more now so I can build up my strength. Being in bed for so long has made me weak and stiff.”
Feeling guilty, she kept stroking his hair, loving the silky texture against her fingers.
He hadn’t been the same since the shooting, becoming quieter and more thoughtful. Even though he’d teased her out of her grouchiness while she’d been healing, there’d been an angry glint in his eyes from time to time, one that made her feel even guiltier.
Smiling faintly, she sighed, wishing she could get him to play again. “I’m sorry. I’m sure you, Hawke, and Blade must be disappointed.”
Lifting his head, Phoenix turned to face her, frowning again. “Disappointed?”
Sarah’s face burned. “Because we haven’t been able to—you know—for over a month. I feel better now, so if you want to—”
“Are you out of your mind?” Phoenix jumped to his feet. “You’ve barely healed enough to get out of bed, and you think we’re gonna jump you?” Slashing a hand through the air, he started pacing. “Christ, woman! You could drive a saint crazy.”
A deep voice came from around the corner. “And you’re not exactly a saint. Hell, none of us is. What’s the problem?” Hawke approached from the other side of the cabin, pausing in front of the porch steps with his hands on his hips, frowning at her. “What the hell are you doing out of bed?”
“The doctor said—”
“The doctor said that he wanted you to get some fresh air and to move, but until you gain your strength, only if one of us is with you. Just getting dressed would have required quite a bit of moving around that you shouldn’t have done on your own.” His tone had an edge she didn’t quite trust, one that had her shifting restlessly in her seat.
Gulping, she shrugged, hiding a wince when it tugged at her shoulder. “I was careful.”
Phoenix folded his arms across his chest and leaned back against the railing. “I thought we’d discussed the fact that you’re going to be more careful in the future.”
“I am going to be more careful. Look at you! When you got shot in the shoulder, you couldn’t stand to be fussed over and made to stay put. I’ve had a month of it! I’m bored. I want to be outside. I want to get
back to my life. I hate feeling like an invalid and I won’t let you keep treating me like I am. I want my husbands back. I want to make love again. I hate being a burden!”
Phoenix smiled and turned to share a look with Hawke over his shoulder. “She’s feeling better.”
Hawke nodded once, his eyes hardening. “I’m glad. She still has a way to go, though. But I’m going to tell you right now, Sarah Royal, that if you ever pull a damned fool stunt like that again, I’ll turn you over my knee and whip your ass until you can’t sit down!”
Sarah watched him turn and walk away, stunned by his violent response. “He’s mad at me.”
Phoenix nodded and lowered himself to the top step with a sigh. “We all were, because you scared the hell out of us. We were mad at you for putting yourself in danger. Mad at you for not trusting us to deal with Willy.” Leaning back against the post, he held her gaze. “Mad at ourselves for not getting to you in time. So furious at Willy and his gang that we wanted to kill them again.”
Touching her knee, he sighed again. “We never thought we’d have a woman in our lives. I liked to play too much to be tied down to one woman. Blade’s too possessive. Hawke had a chip on his shoulder a mile wide, and didn’t think any woman could ever love a man as hard and cold as he was.”
Smiling, he took her hand, lifting his gaze to hers. “And then you came along. You trusted Hawke from the very beginning. The first day we met you, you huddled against him, as if he could save you from the world. You didn’t flinch away from his touch, and you kept looking in his direction every time you felt uneasy.” He laughed softly. “You still do. Even though you know damned well that he loves you, you’re shaken because he’s mad at you.”
Staring out after Hawke, Phoenix sighed again. “Having the responsibility of a wife made playing seem so childish.” Grinning, he turned back to her. “Don’t get me wrong. I love playing with you, but seeing you get shot shook me real bad. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my life. You got shot because I wasn’t fast enough on the trigger.”
Sarah smiled and squeezed his hand, humbled by his admission. “Now you know how I felt when you got shot because of me. If you hadn’t moved as fast as you did, you could have been killed.” Her chest tightened and, blinking back tears, she squeezed his hand again. “I couldn’t have lived with that.”
Phoenix smiled and lifted her hand to his lips. “But I can take care of myself. You’re defenseless here. It’s our job to take care of you.” Straightening, he turned as if sensing something, grinning at Blade’s approach. “Uh-oh. Here comes Blade. He’s changed a lot since we married you, too. Now that he has a woman he can possess, it seems like he can’t get enough. When you were shot, he examined you every day. He sat and stared at you the way Hawke did, as if they could will you to get better.”
Shaking his head, Phoenix watched his brother cross the large yard, his long strides eating up the ground. “Blade’s been obsessed with checking you out, and wants to know every mark on you. Hell, he took the cloth out of your mother’s hand when she was trying to bathe you.” Laughing softly, he patted her hand. “Told her flat out that she was being too rough, and took over the job himself.”
Leaning close, he lowered his voice. “Betcha the first thing he asks is why the hell you’re out of bed.”
* * * *
Blade strode toward Sarah, alarmed to find her sitting on the front porch. Sparing a glare for his smiling brother, he took the stairs two at a time, searching Sarah’s features for any sign of pain or fatigue—something that had become a habit. She looked exhausted, the dark circles under her eyes and too-pale features alarming him. The way she moved spoke volumes about her weakness. “What the hell are you doing out of bed?”
Phoenix grinned and rose to his feet. “Told you. I’m gonna go join Hawke at the well and get cleaned up a little before dinner. Take it easy on her, Blade. She got checked out by the doc.”
Blade’s dark brow went up. “And you think I don’t know that?” Bending, he gathered her against him, and straightened, holding her securely against his chest. “I make it my business to know everything about her.”
The last few weeks had been scary as hell and he spent every available minute watching her, so afraid that he would lose her.
Her fever seemed to last forever, and had kept him and his brothers awake at night, fearing she’d die in her sleep if they didn’t watch her.
When it finally broke, he and Hawke had bathed the sweat from her and then he’d gone outside, crying for the first time in his adult life.
Leaning her head against Blade’s shoulder, she smiled up at him, so light and delicate in his arms that it unnerved him. “Now that Phoenix wears moccasins instead of cowboy boots, he thinks it’s funny as hell to sneak up on me.”
Blade gave her the smile he knew she expected and strode to the bed. “We’re all used to being as quiet as possible so we didn’t wake you. I want to see how you’re healing.”
Mindful of her injuries, he flattened his hand on her thigh and started to raise her skirt, stilling when she laid a hand over his to stop his progress. “Blade, please don’t.”
His stomach clenched, the thought that she’d changed her mind about him during her recovery scaring him to his bones.
She’d taught him that he could love so deeply.
He didn’t think he’d ever find a woman who’d tie herself to a half-breed and embrace living in the middle of nowhere the way Sarah had.
His need for her grew, and went far beyond just physical. The closeness he’d established with her had fed a need inside him he hadn’t even known he’d had.
She was everything he’d ever wanted in a woman—more than he could have ever dreamed of—wrapped in one adorable, desirable package.
And so frighteningly delicate.
The slight flare of panic in her eyes was like a kick to the gut.
She’d never objected to his touch before, and his heart clenched because she did now.
If she’d decided she didn’t want him anymore, he didn’t know how he’d survive it.
Chapter Sixteen
Sarah’s face burned under Blade’s steady stare, and smoothed her hand over his in apology. “It’s ugly.”
Blade blinked, the tension she hadn’t noticed before easing from his body.
Although she didn’t understand the relief in his eyes, his slow smile took her breath away.
Turning his hand to take hers, he held her gaze, his eyes glittering with emotion. “Nothing about you could ever be anything but beautiful to me.”
“You’re just being nice.” Not allowing herself to believe him, she averted her gaze, staring toward the window. “I was already damaged. This just makes it worse.”
“Oh, love.” Pressing her gently back against the pillows, he knelt on the floor beside her. “How could you ever think that?”
She involuntarily leaned into his touch when he pushed her hair back. “I’ve seen the way you, Hawke, and Phoenix look at my scars. You stare at them and then you get this look on your faces and turn away as if you can’t bear to see them.”
Blade wore the same expression now. “And you think it’s because we think they’re so ugly that we can’t stand to look at them?”
“Yes. I under—” She snapped her mouth closed as he slashed a hand through the air and surged to his feet.
Blade’s features hardened even more as he began to pace, his long braid flying with every turn. “You understand nothing! We failed! Do you understand that?” He strode back and forth across the small room, scrubbing his hand over his face. “We were supposed to keep you safe. We were supposed to protect you.”
Stunned by his outburst, Sarah sat up again. “But you did protect me. You came to rescue me, and took care of me.”
“Yes. But, you got hurt. Seeing those scars just reminds us that we didn’t do our job. We didn’t protect you.” Rushing to her side, he knelt beside her, the glitter of emotion in his eyes leaving her staring
up at him in stunned silence.
Shoving her skirt out of the way, he pressed his lips to her now healed wound, gathering her against him. “You could have died.” His arms tightened around her as he pressed his face against her belly. “We came so close to losing you. I love you, and I almost lost you.”
Shocked that his voice broke, Sarah blinked back tears. Running her hand over his sleek hair, she smiled. “You love me?”
Blade lifted his head, his eyes shimmering with unshed tears. He blinked, and they disappeared, only to be replaced with an incredulous look of disbelief. “Of course, I love you. Did getting shot addle your brains?” Rising to his feet, Blade started pacing again.
“How the hell could you not know that I love you?” He spun again, confronting Hawke as he came through the door. “How the hell can she think that we think her scars are ugly?”
Hawke’s brows went up, his gaze zeroing in on hers. “Oh?”
Phoenix came through the door right behind Hawke, frowning at Blade before turning to her. “She thinks that? Has she seen the scars on us?”
Shrugging, Sarah picked at a thread on the sheet covering her. “That’s different. You’re men. I saw the way you looked at them—”
Hawke came closer, his hair dripping wet from where he’d obviously dunked it to cool off again. “And you thought it was because we thought they were ugly?” Shaking his head, he shared a look with his brothers. “It looks like we’ve failed her again.”
To her surprise, Hawke stripped the sheet from the bed, and with a gentleness she hadn’t expected, and an efficiency he’d obviously gained in the past several weeks, stripped her out of her clothes.
Meeting her gaze, he pressed her back against the pillows again and lowered his head. “I’ll show you how ugly I think your scars are.”
