Delver Magic: Book 04 - Nightmare's Shadow

by Jeff Inlo

  Again, Ryson had no answer.

  "No, I can't do that," Enin continued. "I must be prepared to move at a moment's notice to counteract whatever Baannat attempts. I may need to assist the elves in Dark Spruce or the humans here in Connel. I must be ready to deal with any number of contingencies. Remember, Baannat not only controls the dark creatures, he reenergized himself with vast quantities of magical energy."

  Enin offered Ryson one choice, but it was false hope, and the wizard knew it before he even made the suggestion. "In all honesty, you have one other alternative. If you are absolutely determined to remain with your wife, you would have to bring Linda with you into the desert. Think on that carefully. Who would you really be serving? Where do you really think she will be the safest? In the mountains under the protection of cliff behemoths or in the Lacobian where I am sure Baannat will attack in great force... a terrible force if he believes you two are together."

  Linda immediately saw the implications of Enin's offer and she saw the danger to her husband. Believing Ryson might let his emotions get the better of him, she spoke up before he could answer.

  "Ry, you have to go to the desert... and you have to go alone."

  "You agree with him?" Ryson asked, not hiding his shock.

  "How are you going to feel if you discover the algors were attacked while you were trying to protect me? What if they're all killed? What if Baannat takes control of the desert? Will you be able to forgive yourself? Will you be able to forgive me?"

  Ryson, however, could only look at it from the opposite position.

  "I won't be able to forgive myself if something happens to you."

  "Isn't it really my choice?"

  "Actually, no. It's our choice," Ryson replied.

  Linda nodded.

  "You're right. I'm sorry. It is our choice. In all honesty, I want to be with you. I almost want to say—right now—let me come with you to the desert. We can be together. It almost makes sense... almost. The problem is I'm going to distract you if I'm with you. We'll probably both get killed. Am I wrong? And be honest with me."

  "I don't know." Ryson allowed.

  "So what does that leave us?"

  "I'm not sure."

  Linda turned to the wizard.

  "Enin, how long will I have to wait out in the mountains?"

  "I do not believe time is something we have in great quantity. The fact that Baannat ordered the goblins to set fire to Dark Spruce tells me he wants to act quickly. If he does not take the desert by the end of the growing season, I believe he will lose the opportunity."

  "Okay, so not very long. I can live with that—time in the mountains protected by cliff behemoths." Linda then considered the plan in full and voiced another question. "You said I was to go by horse. Couldn't you just cast one of your spells and send me there much faster?"

  Enin shook his head.

  "I would have to accompany you, and I don't think that's wise. More importantly, I don't want to leave an energy trail to where you are going. Although Baannat remains somewhat a mystery to me, I must treat him as the powerful wizard he once was. You are a unique individual and placing you in a magical stream for transportation might be the same as drawing a map for him. I don't want to do that."

  "So it's a journey by horseback." Linda then turned her attention back to Ryson. "You can protect me for that. I know you can. You can get me to the cliff behemoths and then do what you have to do. You go warn the algors, get them to accept the dwarves as allies. A few days or more in the desert for you to help them. Then, you come back for me. Is that really such a bad plan?"

  For Ryson, it was a bad plan. He was being forced down a path he did not wish to travel, forced away from Linda. But apparently, he was the only one that saw it that way. He looked into the eyes of the three people he trusted most, and he knew what they thought.

  "No, I guess it's not."

  That was all Ryson could say, all he would say at the moment, but it seemed as if his life was taking more than an unfortunate turn. He was feeling punished for some crime he did not commit and the discouraging circumstances were quickly breeding a deep bitterness.

  Chapter 15

  "Does it ever bother you?" Ryson asked his wife as he guided her horse through the northern branch of Dark Spruce Forest.

  Linda knew her husband wasn't simply attempting small talk to pass the time, but dwelling on the inescapable seemed a pointless exercise.

  "It always bothers me, but what can you do about it?"

  "I'm not sure if we can do anything, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't talk about it."

  "We talk about it all the time."

  "We haven't talked about this yet."

  "You mean me going to the mountains?"

  The Colad Mountains.

  Ryson could see portions of the majestic range during certain points of their journey. The northern branch of Dark Spruce was one of the thinner sections of the forest, but the foliage and abundance of new growth thrived throughout the trees—enough to block a clear view of the horizon, especially during the growing season. Healthy, light green leaves grew in abundance and filled every open space, taking in as much sunlight as possible. Every now and then, however, Ryson cut through a small clearing or crossed the heights of a plateau and a clear line of sight formed to the north. The mountains overwhelmed the landscape. The scenic beauty that surrounded them offered a stark contrast to the thoughts and fears that overwhelmed the delver.

  "That and all the rest," Ryson finally responded. "I mean it's like here we go all over again."

  "Yeah, that pretty much sums it up," Linda agreed. "Baannat's back. We didn't get much of a break, did we?"

  "No, and that's why I'm asking. Aren't you tired of it? Sometimes I think it just doesn't get any better. If anything, it's getting worse."

  "Some things are worse, some things are better. It's all how you look at it."

  "You can be the eternal optimist if you want, but at some point reality has to set in."

  "And what's reality to you?"

  It was not his intention to frighten his wife, but the seriousness of their situation clearly weighed upon him, left him grasping for answers. Searching for answers was part of being a delver, but these were not the kind of questions that inspired a delver to explore. Ryson faced issues of an internal matter, questions about his place in the land and the consequences of his actions.

  "It isn't just that Baannat is back. He wants you and me dead. And why? Because we got involved with him before. We stopped him, but not for good. Now, we're going to pay for it. That's reality and it's hard to be optimistic when you consider what we're facing. It's not about monsters or magic. It's about something evil wanting very much to kill us."

  Linda didn't know what to say to that. It was true. It was scary. And it was almost painful to consider.

  "What's bothering me the most is it doesn't seem to matter," Ryson explained.

  "What do you mean? What doesn't matter?"

  "What we do. I don't know how else to say it. Why did we even go through all that agony with Baannat to stop him the first time? It didn't work. We're right back where we started and now he wants to get even. Why did we do it?"

  "We didn't have a choice."

  "Maybe we did."

  Linda shook her head.

  "I don't think so. He wasn't going to be satisfied until he destroyed everything in his way. Enin knew he had to fight Baannat, and he needed us to help."

  "And so we did what we had to do," Ryson followed. "We did what we thought was necessary. I know what you're saying, but I still think we had a choice. We could have stayed out of it."

  "I don't think you could have. I know Enin said it was your destiny, but it goes beyond that. Staying out of it was never an option. That's not you, and I think deep down you know that's true."

  "I'm not sure of anything at the moment. You're probably right about me not being able to stay out of it then. I did what I thought I was supposed to do. That's what it's
about, right? We do the best we can... do what we think we should. There's only one problem. I'm starting to think it doesn't matter."

  "Of course it matters. You did what was right. That's what guided you then and it's what guides you now. It's what makes you what you are."

  "Great, and what does it get us? Hunted. Maybe I should try being something else."

  "Don't talk like that."

  "Why not? I'm not looking for some great reward. I never have, but is it too much to ask that maybe I don't get thrown into the fire every single time? Godson, what do I have to do? I try to do the right thing. I try to help people, and now it all seems to get thrown back in my face. I don't want this to sound like I'm feeling sorry for myself, but I'm trying to understand it. And in all honesty, I can't."

  "So you think you don't deserve this?"

  "You think I do?" Ryson sounded a bit surprised.

  "Not at all. You absolutely don't deserve it, but I hope you're not saying that you want life to be fair, because we know what that gets us."

  "No, I don't expect it to be fair, but is it too much to ask that certain things actually mean something? If they don't, then why do we bother? And if they do, why are we back where we started? Only now, it seems like things are much worse. I think that's what's really bothering me."

  Finding Ryson's assertions almost alarming, Linda pointed out what she believed to be true.

  "What we do matters a great deal, especially when we do what's right. You know, in the bar I hear a lot of talk. People say what's right and what's wrong and what they're going to do, but that's only talk. It matters more what you do, and I see that in people. You more than anyone. I'm even surprised you're thinking this way. Of course it matters what we do. Look at what you've done. You saved so many people. You saved all of Uton."

  Ryson didn't want to discount his wife's opinion. He understood she was doing more than complimenting him. She was revealing her pride in what he had done, but pride would only go so far. It wasn't going to save them against Baannat, and rather than simply accept her praise, he dwelled upon his own misgivings.

  "Yeah, I saved Uton; first by destroying a sphere and then helping to kill an evil slink ghoul. Seems like the ghoul didn't want to stay dead. And the magic from the sphere is now being used against all of us. Maybe Heteera was really wrong."

  Linda didn't follow the connection to the sorceress who had come to her in order to obtain Ryson's help.

  "She made a mistake. I wouldn't blame her."

  "That's not what I'm talking about. She was more worried about the magic. She wanted to stop the dark creatures from entering the land in order to show how the magic has helped us. I'm not sure it's helping us at all."

  "What about Enin?" Linda pointed out.

  "Baannat wants him dead, too."

  "That's not Enin's fault."

  "This isn't about fault. It's about understanding what all this is for. I'm not trying to figure out the purpose of life or anything like that. I'm just wondering if any of this really matters. Actually, the truth is I don't even care if it matters. I'm tired."

  Linda could sense the desperation growing in her husband. She knew it probably had more to do with her being in danger than anything else, but she could also see the frustration.

  In a way, she couldn't argue with Ryson. He put his life on the line many times. He risked everything for every race in the land. Yes, he was becoming a legend, but he didn't want the glory, or the price that came with it. He just wanted peace and a chance to enjoy life. He wasn't getting either.

  As they continued on their journey, she realized how lonely their surroundings had become. A few abandoned outposts dotted the trails, but it seemed that only the most brazen—or perhaps most foolish adventurers—utilized these paths. New growth from the forest claimed almost every passageway. Ryson's skills guided them, but it felt as if they were now the only inhabitants in the land.

  "What are you really thinking?" Linda asked in order to keep the silence from overtaking them.

  Ryson appeared to look around, as if to ensure they were truly alone. When he spoke, it was just above a whisper, just loud enough for Linda, and no one else, to hear.

  "Maybe we should just take off to the north. Forget the mountains, forget the cliff behemoths. Let's just lose ourselves."

  Linda was almost tempted to agree. Let the land sort out its own problems, but deep down she knew it wasn't that easy. Where could they go? Where would they really be safe from a maniacal wizard returned from the dead? How would Ryson live with the fact he turned his back on others? Perhaps more importantly, how would she feel about him if that's what he truly wanted?

  She almost didn't want to ask the question, but there was no way to avoid it.

  "You really think that's the best choice?"

  "I'm not sure, but I think it's better than us being separated."

  Linda appreciated the sentiment, agreed with it, but only to a point. There were others to consider.

  "And what about the algors?"

  "Will I really do them any good?"

  "So you would just leave them to Baannat?"

  And here, Ryson made his case. It wasn't just about him. It was about how the rules seemed to stack against him no matter what he did.

  "Maybe I'm not leaving them, maybe I'm really doing them a favor. I'm looking back at everything I've done. Some say I've saved Uton, just like you did. But where has it gotten us? All of us? The sphere was going to destroy the land. Well, now Baannat is going to destroy the land. Seems like we're back at square one. I'm not sure I've saved anything. I think I just keep moving things in a circle."

  "So we remove ourselves from the circle. That's what you want?"

  "Maybe."

  He heaved a heavy sigh and then continued with a weary voice.

  "You're asking me about the algors. Well, why are the algors in danger? Mostly because of me. Seems like the algors keep getting punished for things that I've done. I pulled them into entering Sanctum. They got blamed for a dwarf prince getting killed in there, so the dwarves attacked them, killed thousands."

  "That wasn't your fault or the algors' fault."

  "You keep talking about fault. It's not about fault. It's about what matters. I'm starting to think nothing matters and maybe we should just accept it and get out of here as fast as we can."

  Linda looked into Ryson's eyes. She could see the uncertainty now. She knew he didn't like the idea of leaving her, but she now realized it went far beyond that as well. He was questioning everything he had ever done—every brave action, every selfless deed, everything that made her so very proud to be with him.

  "We can't," she said with a certainty that surprised the delver.

  "We can do anything," he responded almost defensively.

  "No, we can't. You can't become something you're not. If you do, it really will be the end. The end of us, the end of you, the end of everything that brought us together... that keeps us together. I know this isn't about fear, but I think you're losing yourself, and that's what really scares me, more than being hunted by Baannat."

  Ryson almost grimaced. He knew she was right. He was questioning himself, questioning what he believed in because he didn't know what that meant anymore. He was, however, tired—very tired. Tired of fighting battles and wars beyond his reckoning. He was a delver, not some legendary warrior. He wanted simplicity. He was curious in nature, not bold and daring. He wanted to spend the day exploring and then come home to Linda. He wanted an end to the struggles.

  Struggles.

  That was what Lief said they faced, but deep down he knew it went further than that. Ingar's sphere wanted to destroy everything, wanted to end the struggle—the struggle between good and evil, right and wrong, life and death. He destroyed the sphere and the struggle continued. Was he now sorry?

  "I guess I really am just tired," Ryson suggested.

  Linda almost accepted that as the end of the discussion, but she couldn't. He wasn't letting go of his d
oubts and he had nothing to take hold of for hope. As she looked upon him, she noticed the two short war blades sheathed to his hips, blades that Sy had given him to replace what he had lost. The Sword of Decree that he carried on his back was noticeably absent.

  "You miss your sword, don't you?"

  "Miss it?"

  "Yes. I'm not saying you depended on it, but it did have a way to point you in the right direction. In the back of your mind, you knew it was there for you. You don't have it with you anymore. It's a hole."

  "A hole?"

  Linda just nodded.

  "I think it's more than just the sword..." Ryson began, but then a series of shrieks distracted him.

  He knew immediately what they faced, but he had been taken unaware. He had lost focus and they were now in grave danger.

  "Tree rakers!" he yelled over the growing clamor. "Get hold of the reins."

  Linda tightened her grip and pulled to slow the frightened horse, but to no avail.

  The branches of nearby trees began to swing violently as the screams of the rakers grew louder and more violent. The horse bolted in fear and chose the only apparent path.

  "No, not that way!" Ryson shouted. "Pull him back."

  Linda pulled on the bridle with all her strength, but the horse would not relinquish.

  "He's not stopping!"

  "He must have the bit in his teeth!" the delver called out. "Hold on!"

  Moving at incredible speed, Ryson ran along side of the stallion and took hold of the bridle strap at the horse's cheek. He pulled as he ran, but the horse was too strong and too frightened.

  The path ahead narrowed continuously. Thick branches whipped at Ryson's body as he ran through the brush. He ignored the pain, but he could not ignore their plight.

  "Not good!"

  The delver understood the trap. He had dealt with tree rakers before. The worked in packs. Too slow to hunt like wolves, they waited in ambush instead. They set a trap of a single path that appeared to offer a way to freedom, but in fact was no true escape. Using shrieks and startling movements, tree rakers herded frightened pray down a narrow passage. The trail, however, would lead to a dead-end and the rakers would close in from behind.