No Touch Zone (Saints of Love Book 2)
Page 13
The idea that this party would be lame just because it’s for Willow actually pisses me off. But Wyatt doesn’t mean any harm by it. In his eyes, his sister is a book worm, a nerd. And he’s more than happy for that. It means less guys that he has to fend off of her.
If he only knew the truth, he’d be knocking my teeth out right now instead of hugging me and thanking me. If the stars ever aligned and I became the kind of man she needed, I’d tell him in an instant if it meant having a shot at keeping her. But since we all know that will never happen, for obvious reasons, there isn’t any point. And I certainly don’t try to correct him.
“Don’t thank me.” I jerk my thumb at the twenty elderly women trying to drop it low on the dance floor. “Thank them. They always liven things up.”
“Yeah, they do.” Wyatt chuckles. “Remind me to thank them later.”
We talk for a little while about our plans for the next few weeks. All of us leave on Monday, heading to Florida for preseason training. I usually dread this time of year because it means that my free time is officially coming to an end. It feels weird to me that I’m actually looking forward to it this time. I’m more than a little anxious to put some distance between Willow and myself.
I need a break from this town and from seeing her every day. It will do us both some good and give her time to prepare for her wedding while I prepare myself to get over her.
We’re interrupted a few minutes later by Declan.
“Your little old ladies are dirty, Masters.” He shakes his head. “One of them grabbed my junk.”
“I told you, you’re welcome.” Irma marches up behind him and rolls her eyes. “You forgot to say thank you, hot stuff. That was the appropriate response, by the way, for a rub and a tug.”
As Declan’s face flames, all that I can do is shake my head.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Irma?” My arms flap at my sides. “We almost made it through a night without crossing any lines, but you couldn’t let that happen, could you? Did you actually stick your hand down his pants?”
“Well, I tried.” She folds her arms across her chest and glares at Declan. “Who wears underpants that tight? I’d need scissors to get those away from your skin. I understand, because you’re packing. I suppose that a dick that size does need support. But next time, do an old woman a favor would you? Just let it hang.”
“I’m so sorry.” I stare at my teammate, who looks completely violated. “I am so fucking sorry.”
18
Willow
I have no idea why I’m here. I shouldn’t be, that’s for sure. My mother didn’t teach me too many things growing up, mostly because she was too drunk to even function most days, but she did teach me one thing, and I’ve always kept it dear to my heart.
If you have to lie about something, then you shouldn’t be doing it.
I broke that rule today when I told BJ that I needed to go shopping for some new scrubs for my residency that starts in a few days. It’s a big fat lie, but it was the only one that I could come up with on such short notice.
I’ve been telling myself that it’s just because I need to clear the air between us before he leaves. I need to apologize to him for all of the mean things that I’ve said and done and thank him one last time for all that he’s done for me.
Lord knows, I haven’t deserved his kindness. I’ve treated Jude like shit every chance that I’ve had, and in return, he’s only been nicer to me. He’s done more for me in the last month than anyone has my entire life, aside from my brother, of course.
I’m starting a residency soon that I thought I didn’t have a shot at. And while it’s not my first choice, it’s a step in the right direction, and it’s one ladder rung closer to officially being the doctor that I want to be.
Yes. I’m here just to say thank you. There are no other reasons, I have no hidden agenda.
Yeah right. You just want to see him one more time.
Before I can change my mind, I ring his doorbell. Luckily, he answers quickly, because the longer that I stand here on his front porch, the more that my resolve fades.
“Willow?” As the door swings open, and Jude stares out at me in shock, my heart does a flip in my chest. He’s obviously fresh out of the shower. There are still a few beads of water running down his chest, trickling dangerously close to the waist band of his jeans, which is the last place that I need to focus on. But it’s hard when he’s half naked and standing in front of me. With his muscles on full display, and the colorful tattoos that cover his skin right in front of my eyes, lust for the man floods my veins. So much in fact, that I have to take a step back before I pounce the guy. “What are you doing here?”
“I…” My words are lost. He doesn’t invite me inside, which is a damn good thing. The last thing that I need to do is walk inside of his house. I have no doubts that the only way I’d be walking out is with a delicious ache in between my legs, courtesy of Jude Masters and his impressive package. It’s better if I stand out here in the cold and cool down before I do something that I know that I’ll regret.
“I came here to say thank you, Jude.” It’s easier to force my words out when there is some distance between us. “I really wanted to tell you that before you left. You showed me a lot of kindness, more than I deserved. And I never really gave you a proper thank you.”
His eyes darken, and as they do, my pulse races. Good God, this man has a profound effect on me. I want to tell myself that it’s because I haven’t had sex since him. I’m just bound up, unable to find a release. But even that would be a lie. I haven’t had sex with my fiancé because I’m worried that after Jude, BJ isn’t going to measure up anymore.
I know that seems silly, because he’s always rocked my world in bed. But that was before Jude Masters. And when Jude told me that he’d wrecked me, even though I didn’t want to admit it, I was fairly certain that he was right.
Now, I’m absolutely positive.
“Willow, I don’t know what kind of thank you would be proper, but if you’re intending to thank me, I’m going to have to pass. You’re nearly a married woman, and I follow the bro code religiously.”
“Get your mind out of the gutter, Masters.” I roll my eyes, even though my ego takes a hit from his quick dismissal. “I just wanted to say thanks. I start my residency this week, and it’s all because of you. If you wouldn’t have helped me, I’d be completely out of luck. I really appreciate you. And I wanted you to know that before you left.”
He doesn’t say anything in response. He just stares at me for what feels like forever, before his eyes travel down to my left hand. When they land on the rock still blinging on my finger, his entire demeanor changes. The playful Jude is back, as if he pulled one mask off and put another one on. He’s damn good at that, I’ve noticed.
“Thanks. I, ah.” The way that he licks his lips makes desire pool in between my legs for the man. I remember exactly what it felt like to have that tongue in that exact same spot, and honestly, it makes me ache with need. I immediately shove those thoughts aside. “I got the save the date for your wedding, and I’m not sure that I can make it. I just wanted you to know, that it’s not because of what happened between us, it’s just that it’s right in the middle of preseason training, you know? And it’s frowned upon to miss any days.”
“Oh.” It shouldn’t sting the way that it does, but dammit, I hate that my wedding isn’t important to him. Why the fuck would it be, Willow? You’re marrying someone else.
“But, yeah. Thanks for stopping by, and, good luck with your residency. I’m sure that you’ll do great.” He’s trying to dismiss me, and I get that. Unfortunately, even though my brain is telling my feet to move, they don’t seem to be getting the message. They stay firmly planted on the ground.
“I’m sure you’ll do great at spring training. Try not to get yourself in any trouble down there. I’m sure the babes in Florida are going to be on you like bees on honey.”
More silence. Jude just nods his head.r />
He’s too nice of a guy to shut the door in my face, but it’s obvious that he wants me to leave. I’m sure I look like a fool, standing here, but I just can’t seem to walk away from the guy. I know in my heart that this is it. This will be the last time that Jude and I are alone. It has to be, honestly. He’s my sweetest sin, and I am a natural born sinner. At least, where Jude is concerned, I am. The temptation when I’m near him is just too strong, and I despise cheaters. I don’t ever want to be one, because BJ deserves more than that. He deserves all of me, not the little shreds left after Jude wrecks me one last time.
But even still, I hate saying goodbye to him. It feels so damn wrong, even though, I have no doubt that it’s the right thing to do. How many times does he have to tell me that he’s not the guy that I end up with in the end? Too many, obviously.
My stupid head just can’t seem to get the memo, and my heart can’t catch up, either.
“Jude, are we good?” I swallow past the lump in my throat, staring into his eyes, desperate for the truth. “And I mean, actually good? I feel like I did you wrong, and it isn’t a good feeling. I mean, I feel like a major slut for the way that things went down. Sleeping with you in the morning, and then taking my fiancé back at night seems like an awfully horrible thing to do.”
When his face softens, I know in my heart that we’re going to be ok. Jude isn’t holding a grudge against me, and that takes some of the weight off of my shoulders.
“Willow.” A half smile tugs at the corner of his lips. “Of course, we’re good. You’re doing the right thing, you know. BJ is the guy that you’re supposed to end up with. He loves you a whole bunch. It’s totally obvious. He’s the guy that you end up with in the end, sweetheart, and you and I both know that. I’m just the guy that you had fun with a few times. I’m not your forever, and you really shouldn’t be here.”
“Why is that?” Why I’m even asking, is beyond me. I already know why. Jude is a one nighter. He’s a fun time, and a good lay. Anything more than that, and he’s a heartbreaker. I only wish that I had protected mine from him, because I knew all along that he wouldn’t want me around forever.
“Don’t do this, Willow.” The way that he sighs and runs his hand down his face makes my heart clench. It’s almost painful to watch, because he looks so torn. I wish that he could see the side of him that I do. The sweet, amazing guy, who spends his time with elderly women and then makes magic happen in the bedroom at night.
Jude Masters is the whole package. The only problem is, he’s everyone’s whole package. And he could never be just mine. “I’ve already told you why. I’m not a relationship guy. Spending any more time with me will only break your heart. Now seriously, you’ve got to go. Go home to your fiancé, Willow. Go now, before something happens that we’ll both regret.”
19
Jude
Preseason training always kicks my ass. At least, the first month or two of it does. Coach says that it’s because we act like animals during our time off. We drink too much, we party too much, and we don’t spend enough time keeping our bodies in shape.
While I’ll never admit it, he’s right. And even though I tell myself that next year I’ll do better, and next year, I’ll stay in shape, even I know that it’s bullshit. The second this season ends, I’ll go right back to my old ways.
Some things never change.
Every bit of me aches as I make my way off of the field. As the hot Florida sun beats down on my back, the last bit of fluid in my system leaks out. My muscles hurt so deeply, that it feels as if my bones are cracking with each step towards the locker room. I may only be twenty eight, but football makes me feel like I’m pushing fifty. Each year, I feel older, and each year, my body aches even more.
I don’t mind feeling like this during the season, because games are my jam. I love the rush of the plays, the excitement over the wins, and the feeling in the pit of my stomach when I cross into the end zone with the ball in my hand is unlike anything that I’ve ever felt before.
Except for being inside Willow. That feels better than any touchdown I’ve ever had in my entire career.
I turn the shower on full blast, setting the temperature to the coldest available. Every time she enters my mind, I do this exact thing. A cold shower always rids my mind of the images of her. Sometimes it’s hard, especially when I hear Wyatt talking about her wedding. But I have no doubt that her marrying someone else is the right thing, and that makes it easier.
I know that in time, I’ll get over her. How long, I can’t be sure, but someday, it’ll happen.
I may be a wrinkly old man by the time that day comes, but hell, I’m still looking forward to it.
I stand in the shower until the pain in my muscles starts to subside and the vision of her leaves my mind. All too soon though, it returns, from just the sound of her name.
“Willow’s in town tonight.” Wyatt beams as he tosses me a towel. “You want to hang out with us? We’re going to have dinner around six.”
A lump immediately forms in my throat over the thought of being anywhere near her. I shake my head right away.
“Nah, bro. I don’t want to encroach on your time with your baby sis. Tell her I said hey, though. And that I hope things are going good for her.”
“You sure? She wouldn’t mind. She doesn’t hate you like she used to.” He laughs, but all that I can do is force the fakest fucking smile that I can muster.
“Well, that’s good. She used to really hate my guts.”
“Yeah.” Wyatt shrugs. “She just didn’t like all of the fucking and all of the babes. I actually get it now, you know? It had to be weird for her to see that shit all of the time. I’m kind of over it myself.”
“You?” This shocks the hell out of me. “You’re the king of the babes. You’re seriously done partying?”
The way that he shrugs makes me take notice. And I almost wonder if it’s because Wyatt met someone. I have a hard time imagining him settling down, but then again, Willow getting married might have opened his eyes to a different kind of lifestyle.
“I mean, I don’t know. It’s just starting to get old, that’s all. Drinking makes me feel like shit these days and having women ready to do anything that I ask is just getting old. It’s not like I want to up and get married or anything, but I don’t know. I guess I’m just growing up.”
“Well, I’m not ditching out on you, Jude, so no worries there, buddy.” Declan scoffs at Wyatt and lifts his chin at me. “I’ll take your entire female contact list off of your hands, Wyatt. And I’ll plow through them all, one by one, just for you. Sharing is caring, after all.”
He and Wyatt go back and forth for a while, which takes both of their attention off of me. I slip some clothes on and toss my bag over my shoulder. I call out my goodbyes to them both, but neither one of them hear me. Which is completely fine. I’m planning on heading right to the condo that I rented for the next few months and spending the rest of the night soaking my aching body in the hot tub, trying hard not to think about the fact that Willow is now in the same zip code as me, still wearing another man’s ring.
“Are you guys behaving?”
Irma and Martha both nod into the phone. Face timing with them is pretty hilarious, since neither one of them have much of a grasp on it and always hold the iPad too close to their faces, so mostly, I’m talking to their noses.
“Of course, we are.” Gigi shoves her head in front of the camera, but all that I can see is her turkey neck. “Why wouldn’t we be?”
I fight to keep my eyes from rolling and just simply shake my head.
“Gee, girls, I don’t know. Probably because you all are freaking nuts?” I hate to even admit it, but I miss all of their crazy asses. Even though they drive me crazy on a daily basis with all of their stunts, they at least keep life interesting. Since I’ve stopped partying all together, my life here in Florida has become downright boring. I look forward to our nightly skyping, so that I can at least see them, or more fitting
, their noses, and hear their voices.
“That new nurse you hired is mighty easy on the eyes, Juju.” Martha grins wide, but all that I can see is her dentures. The camera is so close to her face that her lips aren’t even visible. “He’s got a real nice behind. Did you pick him for that reason?”
“Tell them to stop smacking him on the butt, Jude!” Jose calls out from somewhere in the room. “He’s already talking about quitting.”
“Ladies.” I can’t even force myself to sound angry. At this point, what’s the use? Plus, being away from them makes dealing with their shenanigans a lot easier. And honestly, hearing about them makes me miss them more. “You really gotta chill, alright? Be nice to the new nurse, and don’t smack his ass. If you keep it up, I’m going to hire all women. How would you like that?”
“You wouldn’t.” The iPad is finally pulled back, and I can see Gigi’s wide eyes. “That’s low, Juju. That’s lower than low. We enjoy our man candy.”
“Oh, for goodness sake.” Jose mutters, “It’s never going to end.”
Since I can’t be there to keep the women in line, I had to hire some extra help. There is an extra nurse on staff, which gives Jose a much needed break, and I hired three nurses’ aides, who the ladies adore. Ciara has become the real MVP, checking in every day with them and making sure that things run smoothly. That’s the part that I get the most complaints about. But the ladies should be happy right now, since Ciara is on her way here to Florida.
I have a meeting tomorrow morning with a men’s deodorant company, who would like me to be their spokesperson. Usually I don’t do hygiene products, but the money was damn good, and plus, I actually use the product already. It’s basically a win in my book. But I need Ciara by my side to make sure that the deal goes smoothly. At five foot one, she looks sweet and demure, but buried underneath her beautiful, petite frame is a vicious shark. She’ll make sure to squeeze every penny out of them. I can always count on her to have my back.