Lemon Meringue Pie Murder (Hannah Swensen Mysteries)

by Joanne Fluke

  “You think I’m as dumb as Freddy?” Jed’s laughter rang out. “I’m plugging up the air vent. When your air runs out, you’ll die.”

  Hannah banged on the door with her fists, then she shouted out, “Why are you doing this, Jed? Are you crazy?”

  “Maybe, but that’s better than being dumb. Freddy told me about that present you hid for him and he even confessed what it was. But the stubborn retard wouldn’t tell me where he hid it. Thanks to your big mouth, I know it’s right here.”

  Hannah’s mind flashed on Freddy’s still form in the hospital bed and she shivered. “Did you try to kill Freddy?”

  “’Course I did. He was gonna blab, sooner or later. I poured booze over him so it’d look like he was drunk and he fought with someone, but you and your sister got there too quick. You should’ve let him die in peace. Now I’m going to have to go back to the hospital and finish the job.”

  “The nurses won’t let you near him!” Hannah countered, even though she knew it wasn’t true. If Jed turned on the charm and asked to take a peek at his cousin, the nurses would think he was wonderful for caring so much.

  “The nurses won’t even know I’m there. I unlatched the window before I left. It’ll be easy to sneak into Freddy’s room right after they check on him at midnight. It was real nice of you to notice that respirator. All I have to do is shut it off and it’ll take care of Freddy for good. He’s so stupid he doesn’t deserve to live anyway.”

  Hannah saw red. Jed had been living a lie, pretending to like Freddy and freeloading by living in his house. This con man and killer had taken them all in and she wished she had superhuman powers so that she could tear the cooler door off its hinges and break Jed in two like a matchstick.

  “You know, you were always pretty nice to me, giving me all those free cookies and stuff. I’m starting to feel real bad about locking you in and leaving you to die. If you tell me where you put that shoebox Freddy gave you, I might just give you a break. I could always unplug that vent and they’ll find you in a couple of days. I might even call to tell them where you are. I’m gonna be in a real good mood once I start spending all that cash.”

  Hannah recognized the ploy for what it was. Jed would kill her whether she told him where the shoebox was, or not. But why not tell him, especially since the box was hidden in the perfect place? Hannah picked up the heaviest thing she could find, the bowl of cookie dough she’d just mixed, and moved close to the door. “If I tell you where it is, you’ll let me go?”

  “Sure. Where it is?”

  “Right here in the cooler,” Hannah said, tightening her grip on the metal bowl.

  Jed laughed long and hard. “Nice try, but I don’t believe you. You’re probably holding something heavy right now, getting ready to take a swing at me when I open the door. It’d be nice to have that shoebox and I’ll look around some before I leave, but I can get along without it. Nobody around here will guess it belonged to me once you and Freddy are dead.”

  Hannah pressed her ear to the cooler door and she heard Jed rummaging around in her kitchen, banging cupboard doors. He searched for about five minutes and then she heard the back door open and close behind him.

  A shudder ran through Hannah’s body, from the top of her head down to the tip of her toes. She was trapped and no one would think to look for her here. Why hadn’t she listened to Andrea when she’d urged her to get a cell phone? If she had one, she could call to warn the hospital that Jed was coming to kill Freddy at midnight and she could tell them to send someone to rescue her. But she didn’t have a cell phone and even if she had, it was doubtful that she would have carried it into the cooler with her.

  Hannah did her best to stay calm and consider her options. There weren’t many, but it would take a while for the air to run out and she wasn’t dead yet. Banging on the cooler wall wouldn’t do any good. It was thick and there was no one around to hear her anyway. Nobody ever came down the alley at night except…

  Herb Beeseman! Hannah glanced at her watch. It was ten forty-five and Herb made his rounds at eleven o’clock every night. He wouldn’t be able to hear her if he just drove down the alley, but if the alarm in Granny’s Attic went off, that would get him out of his squad car.

  Hannah did her best to concentrate. She had to make the alarm in Granny’s Attic go off. It was rigged to trigger every time the power failed and it shared a circuit with her freezer and her cooler. If she could figure out a way to short out that circuit, the alarm would sound and Herb would respond. He’d check Granny’s Attic first, but then he’d come into The Cookie Jar. And when he came into her kitchen to check to see that her freezer and cooler were still working, she’d use the metal bowl with the dough she’d just mixed to bang on the cooler door for all she was worth.

  How could she short out the circuit? Hannah glanced around her. She couldn’t get at any switches, but there was an electrical panel near the floor in the back. She got down on her hands and knees to examine it and started to frown. It was held in place by screws and she didn’t have a screwdriver. She spent precious minutes trying to loosen the screws with her fingernails, but the last repairman who’d come to check the cooler had tightened the screws down much too diligently.

  Hannah sat down and sighed. What could a person use for a screwdriver if a person didn’t have a screwdriver? She’d once used a table knife, much to the dismay of her father who’d caught her doing it, but she didn’t have a table knife either. She took a deep breath, let it out again to relax, and that was when she remembered that Rhonda had been stabbed with a knife. Jed had been very anxious to recover that shoebox Freddy had given her and that meant there was something important inside. It had to contain the knife that Jed had used to stab Rhonda!

  Hannah stood up to get the shoebox and sat back down to open it. She was chilled to the bone and her fingers were shaking so hard, she could barely untie the twine. When she lifted the lid and unrolled the old rag that was inside, she let out a cry of pure relief. It was a hunting knife, a long one with a sturdy, wicked-looking blade. She was about to grab it when she realized that the handle was metal and it might have fingerprints on it.

  This consideration didn’t stop Hannah for long. Her situation was growing more desperate by the minute. She grabbed one of the nonskid mats that lined the cooler shelves and used it for a glove. Then she leaned forward and began to loosen the screws that held the cover of the electrical panel in place.

  It took a few minutes, but at last the cover came off and Hannah stared at the array of wires inside. She could pull them loose, but that might not short out the circuit.

  Hannah leaned closer to peer inside the panel. There was a caution sticker on one part, a warning to shut off the power before attempting to replace that part and to use properly insulated tools. Hannah glanced down at the metal blade of the knife. The power was on, and the knife blade wasn’t insulated. That made two out of two warnings she would ignore and it ought to do the trick. Unfortunately, the handle of the knife was also metal and she could fry. On the other hand, she was going to die anyway and it was worth a shot, especially if she wrapped the knife handle in the nonskid mat again.

  Once that was accomplished, Hannah prepared for action. She had to hurry. Herb would be coming down the alley any minute. She took a split second to decide where to plunge the knife and decided to aim for the red sticker that read “Danger.” The cooler light would go out when the circuit blew, so she pushed the mixing bowl right up against the cooler door. Then she turned back to the open panel, took a deep breath, and stabbed.

  The moment the tip of the knife blade hit the danger sticker, a huge ball of light knocked Hannah flat on her back. Despite the fact that she was seeing stars, Hannah sat up, crawled to the door, and listened. The alarm was going off next door. She’d done it and she was still alive! Now all she had to do was wait for Herb and bang on the cooler door when he came into her kitchen.

  It seemed like forever, crouching there in the dark, but at last Hanna
h heard the back door open and she banged on the cooler door as hard as she could. A second later, she heard a mumbled expletive and then a shout.

  “Hannah? Are you in there?”

  “Yes!” Hannah shouted back at the top of her lungs.

  “The handle’s padlocked, but I’ve got bolt cutters in the cruiser. Just sit tight for a minute.”

  Just sit tight? Hannah started to giggle with a mixture of relief and anxiety. What else could she do but sit tight? She giggled as she heard Herb cutting off the padlock, and she giggled when she heard him open the door. She was still giggling when he pulled her to her feet and gathered her into his arms. Then she remembered about Freddy and her giggles stopped abruptly.

  “What happened, Hannah?”

  “Later,” Hannah said, taking a huge gulp of welcome air. “Do you have a police radio in your patrol car?”

  “Sure.”

  “Get through to the sheriff’s department and tell them to post a deputy in Freddy Sawyer’s hospital room. He’s going to be murdered at midnight. Tell them not to let anyone but Doc Knight in or out until they hear from me.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I’m positive. Would a woman who’s been locked inside her own cooler by a stone-cold killer lie to you?”

  Herb looked as if he wanted to ask a million questions, but he turned on his heel and rushed out to his patrol car to make the call. By the time he came back in, Hannah had already called the hospital and Doc Knight had promised to send his biggest orderly to stand guard in Freddy’s room until the deputy arrived. She’d also retrieved the murder weapon and packed it and the nonskid mat in Freddy’s shoebox.

  “Now will you tell me what happened?” Herb asked, staring at Hannah with a mixture of alarm and admiration.

  “I’ll tell you on the way out to the sheriff’s station. I know who killed Rhonda and I need to give them the facts. And I know who has that old bank robbery money, too.”

  “And you want me to drive you out there?”

  “Rhonda’s killer is the one who locked me in my cooler and plugged up the air vent. I think I’m still a little shaky from the cold and the lack of oxygen. Not only that, I had to short out the power with the murder weapon and I got knocked back against the wall.”

  “No problem,” Herb said, holding the door open for her.

  “Good. Mike’s not going to be too happy about the murder weapon. I bent it a little when I used it for a screwdriver and it’s got a burn hole in the blade from shorting out the power. Maybe they can still lift some fingerprints if I didn’t smudge them with the nonskid mat. Are you sure you don’t mind driving me?”

  “Anytime, Hannah.” Herb shook his head as they went out the door. “Let me see if I got this straight. You got locked in the cooler by Rhonda’s killer, you used the murder weapon as a screwdriver and a tool to short out the circuit, you discovered that Freddy was targeted for murder at midnight tonight, and you know who has the loot from that old bank robbery?”

  “That about sums it up. I’m sorry about pulling you away from your rounds, Herb. I owe you, big-time.”

  “Maybe I should listen in at the sheriff’s station. Then you won’t have to explain it all twice.”

  “That’s a good idea. I’ll tell them I want you with me.”

  “Okay, then you already paid me back.” Herb opened the door of his patrol car for Hannah and helped her in.

  “How did I pay you?” Hannah asked, buckling her seat belt and leaning back for the ride.

  “I’ll be there to see the expression on Mike’s face when you explain all this. Believe me, Hannah. You paid me big-time!”

  Chapter

  Thirty

  “Y ou look great, Hannah,” Norman said as Hannah approached the largest table in the dining room at the Lake Eden Inn.

  “Thanks, Norman.” Hannah gave him a warm smile and then she turned to Delores and Carrie. “You’re here early.”

  Delores nodded. “I know. I wanted everything to be perfect.”

  “I’m sure it will be.” Hannah pulled out a chair, but her mother shook her head.

  “Not there, dear. I want you to sit on Norman’s right.”

  Hannah rolled her eyes, but she took the chair her mother indicated. Delores always liked to arrange the seating at her parties, and she was the one who’d invited them for dinner to celebrate the solving of Rhonda’s murder case.

  “Aren’t these flowers gorgeous?” Delores gestured toward the colorful centerpiece of summer flowers. “Herb Beeseman sent them. They must be for you.”

  “For me?” Hannah was puzzled.

  “Of course. You solved Rhonda’s murder. But you really should have brought a gift for Herb. He’s the one who rescued you from that cooler.”

  “I did bring something for Herb,” Hannah defended herself. “He’s been asking for pineapple cookies for ages and I came up with a new cookie bar recipe. They’re called Pineapple Right-Side-Up Bars and they’re in Sally’s kitchen, along with my pizza cutter.”

  Norman looked puzzled. “Your pizza cutter?”

  “It’s something I learned from my college roommate. Cynthia always used a pizza cutter on pans of brownies. It works better than a knife.”

  “Hi, everybody!” Tracey called out, tugging at Andrea’s hand to hurry her along toward the table. She was dressed in a pale blue silk dress with white lace around the sleeves and the hemline. “Look at me. I’m all dressed up for dinner.”

  “And you look just lovely,” Delores said, patting the chair next to her.

  “I know. Daddy told me I’m almost as pretty as Mommy. He’s coming in a minute with Uncle Mike.” Tracey climbed up in the chair next to Delores and grinned at everyone. “Hi, Uncle Norman.”

  Andrea passed by the back of Hannah’s chair on her way around the table, and Hannah pulled her down for a private word. “Tracey’s calling everyone uncle again.”

  “I know. I taught her not to discriminate,” Andrea whispered back and then she straightened up to address the whole table. “How many people are coming?”

  “Twelve,” Delores answered. “All of us, plus Lisa and Herb. And Lonnie is coming with Michelle.”

  “We’re here.” Bill came up to the table with Mike. Both of them were wearing their uniforms and they looked very handsome.

  “Sit right here, Bill.” Delores gestured to a chair next to Andrea. “Mike? Take that place by Hannah.”

  Hannah maintained her pleasant expression, but she resolved to have a talk with her mother about the seating arrangements for these family gatherings. Her mother always sandwiched her in between Norman and Mike, and she was beginning to feel like peanut butter.

  “Did you see Freddy this morning?” Andrea asked her.

  “Yes, I did. I drove out to the hospital right after I delivered my cookies for the church bake sale.” Hannah gave a small smile. Thanks to the layer of plastic wrap on top of her bowl, her dough had been intact and she’d baked her cookies early this morning. If she didn’t tell, no one would ever guess what that batch of Molasses Crackles had been through. “Doc Knight says Freddy’s going to make a full recovery. I was there when they took him off the respirator and the first thing he told us was that Jed had attacked him.”

  “Did he understand why?” Norman asked.

  “He did after we explained it. Freddy said he hoped they’d lock Jed up for good so he couldn’t hurt anyone else.”

  “That shouldn’t be a problem,” Mike said. “We got a full confession. And since we found the stolen money in Jed’s truck, the only question now is who gets to prosecute him first, the Feds or us.”

  “Hi!” Lisa was grinning ear-to-ear as she approached the table with Herb. “I’m sorry we’re late. We stopped at the hospital to see Freddy and he wanted to tell us all about his new job.”

  Herb pulled out a chair for Lisa, then took his place at the table. “Doc Knight found a job for Freddy at the hospital doing maintenance work and taking care of the grounds.”


  “There’s Aunt Michelle!” Tracey said, standing up to wave. “And Uncle Lonnie’s with her.”

  Hannah laughed at the shocked expression on Andrea’s face. It was clear her sister was now regretting teaching Tracey indiscriminate use of the term “uncle.” It wasn’t that Andrea disliked Lonnie, but she’d made it clear that she didn’t approve of Michelle dating anyone in law enforcement. She’d explained that it was all right for Hannah since she was older and more independent, but she felt that Michelle should have a boyfriend with a less demanding job.

  “Isn’t it a beautiful evening?” Lisa asked, looking straight at Hannah and closing one eye in a wink. “I think this is the best night of my life. And there’s even a full moon!”

  Hannah stared hard at Lisa. Something was definitely wrong with her partner. Lisa’s eyes were sparkling, her face was flushed, and she looked as if she’d been awarded the Nobel Prize, the Miss Universe crown, and an Olympic gold medal all at once. If Hannah hadn’t known better, she might have suspected that Lisa was giddy on champagne, but the cork was still in the bottle.

  “Are you okay, Lisa?” Hannah asked.

  “I’ve never been more okay in my life!” Lisa gave a little giggle and reached for her water glass.

  Hannah blinked. Lisa was holding her water glass awkwardly, with her finger held straight out as if it hurt. She was about to ask how she’d injured her hand and whether Doc Knight had given her pain pills when Andrea let out a gasp.

  “Oh, my!” Andrea squealed and rushed over to hug Lisa. “Why didn’t you say something sooner? This is just wonderful!”

  Hannah regarded her sister with total amazement. Had everyone gone crazy? “What’s wonderful?”