Behind His Lens

by R.S. Grey

  I roll my eyes and then narrow them playfully toward her. “Oh God, thanks for the pep talk.”

  “Good luck!” she calls as I laugh and shake my head, walking toward Ryan and Jude. Now that she’s drawn my attention back to my suit, I decide to leave the robe on for the time being. They’ll want to talk to me for a few seconds before we start shooting anyway. I don’t feel like having that conversation in my tiny bikini.

  As my toes dip into the warm sand, my gaze finally meets Jude’s and he smiles wide, stealing my full attention like a camera flash. I’m left blinking toward his brightness before regaining my composure. I offer him a timid smile, taking in the sight of him in a thin vintage cotton shirt and long khaki pants that are rolled up at the bottom, out of the sand. The clothes aren’t overtly sexy, but he fills them out so well with his dangerous muscles and trim lines. I can tell he’s already acquired a nice tan from standing out in the tropical sun. His blue eyes seem even more striking in contrast to his newly warm complexion, and I can’t seem to avert my eyes even as Ryan begins to give instructions about the shoots.

  I nod. Yes, yes, blah, blah, blah… Jude is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.

  “Alright, Charley,” Ryan says, clearing his throat pointedly, and I make an effort to appear as though I’m listening. “I’m not sure how much you saw of Veronica’s shots but yours will be completely different. You’re on the cover. We need a photo that’s going to draw attention and sell magazines. Obviously we won’t display any nudity, but we need these shots to ooze sex appeal…” he pauses, scanning down my legs with such studied intent that I follow his gaze to confirm that my legs are indeed not glowing bright neon or on fire. I fidget awkwardly as he continues. “Although, I don’t think you’ll have any problem with that.”

  Is he flirting with me or is that just the way he usually preps models? His assistant’s baffled stare and Jude’s dominant pose point to the first option, but I can’t focus on that right now. He just wants me to feel confident and sexy, that’s all.

  “Sounds good,” I nod, trying to relax and get into character even though I know Jude is moments away from forcing Ryan’s gaze away from my legs manually.

  His assistant steps forward then and reaches her diminutive hand out. “Let me take your robe for you, Charley,” she offers with a polite smile. She’s so small, maybe five feet on the dot, and I focus on her as I follow her instructions, feeling the hot sun beat down on my newly exposed skin.

  The gold necklace slinks across my flesh as I hand over the robe and turn toward Jude. I can’t blame Bella for staying to watch; he’s practically smoldering, and his entire demeanor changes as he glances over my skimpy bathing suit. The Brazilian bottom is composed of a triangle piece that covers the most important real estate and then two thin strings that tie on both sides. They sit right on my hip and I keep fingering the fabric to ensure that they’re tied securely.

  The bandeau top is thin; a few measly inches covering my chest with a tight twist in the middle that pulls my boobs up and together. Jude’s eyes nearly sear my flesh as they rake down my body and I instantly want to send a “thank you” card to the designer of this bathing suit. Maybe a fruit basket as well.

  “Modest, right?” My lips curl into a private smile as I watch him devour me. Anyone within a ten foot radius could see those blue eyes cloud over in lust. This is more skin than he’s ever seen. That, combined with the realization that he knows what my breasts look like beneath the swimsuit top, makes my cheeks flush and my eyes scan down toward the white sand.

  “Very,” Jude mocks dryly. My head snaps up just in time to see him start to turn and lead us over to the set.

  The other photo shoot I did with him was closed, but since we’re outside, on-location, all of the crew is standing off to the side, either working with lighting and diffusers or running around looking for accessories and swimsuits. I can feel their eyes studying my movements, adding onto the growing mass of fans and paparazzi staring from the other side of the barriers. I know they aren’t staring because I’m famous, they’re merely curious about what all the fuss is about. If I could, I would will them all away. As it is, I’ll need to block them out completely or I’ll freeze up for every shot.

  “Let’s start with some poses in the sand,” Ryan instructs. “And then we’ll move into the water. I think that might be where we get the best shots.”

  I nod, turning toward the camera and taking a deep breath. I shift around in the sand, getting a feel for the way the bikini highlights certain parts of my figure. I lengthen my neck and then my side and before I know it, Jude's clicking away and the shoot is in full swing. The island breeze blows back my soft curls and the sand feels warm and inviting beneath my feet, but I can’t seem to get the crowds out of my head. I’m posing for the camera, but my body feels stiff. Even though I try to keep my gaze over the ocean, I can’t seem to move past everyone’s judgments. Are they wondering why I was picked over everyone else to be on the cover while I’m standing here like a limp noodle?

  “More, Charley! Those arms look dead,” Ryan instructs, trying to liven me up. His critiques don’t help though, they make me even more self-conscious and I have to fight the urge to clam up further. Relax and move.

  Another few shots pass and I know I still haven’t given them anything that’ll sell magazines.

  “No, too robotic. Loosen up,” Ryan huffs, clearly annoyed.

  I smile tightly and shake out my limbs, trying to free my mind, but Ryan’s commands don’t feel right. They make me tense up even more. I roll my neck over my shoulders and take another deep breath, willing the island scenery to calm my nerves. But the bright flowers, palm trees, and vibrant water aren’t enough to distract me.

  “Hey, Charley, look at me.” Jude’s dark voice croons over the waves, and I comply immediately, sweeping my gaze up to him. Looking at him then was like watching my desire unfold. He’s dropped the camera away from his eyes and he’s wearing one of his dimpled smiles across his handsome features. The moment I focus solely on him, my pulse picks up and I start to lose myself in his magnetism. He’s all that matters.

  “You look beautiful. Look at the camera and move for me.” His eyes implore me to follow his commands, and suddenly, the rest of the crew fades away and it’s just him and me. He steps forward, strengthening our connection, until my body softens beneath his gaze.

  My limbs start to move as if he has them wrapped around his finger like a puppeteer. The weight of his intoxicating masculinity melts away my fear as I press my arms together down my side. I know the pose will push my breasts together in an alluring gesture for the camera. Then, I slowly slide my hands down my thighs, staring right at Jude as my fingertips graze the skin below my bikini bottom. He nods and I can just barely make out his devilish grin beneath the camera lens. I keep moving, experimenting with different poses, arching my back, stretching my arms above my head, and angling toward the camera. I rise up onto the balls of my feet so that my legs stretch out gracefully. My back arches sharply and my butt sticks out as I drag my hands through my hair.

  “Much better, Charley!” Ryan yells, but his shallow voice sounds like it’s coming through a tunnel. I’m moving for Jude, no one else.

  The tropical sun pours over us and a bead of sweat runs down my neck, along the valley of my breasts. Jude pauses, pulls the camera away, and eyes me dangerously. It’s the kind of look he’d have before flooring a car down a long dirt road: impulsive and alive.

  “Let’s move to the water,” Jude commands. My cheeks flush under his gaze, and I wonder what he thinks of the photos so far.

  As we step closer to the slow-rolling shore, I shake out my hair and let it fall alluring around my face.

  “Stay facing me,” Jude directs, “and walk slowly back into the water, like you’re inviting me in with you.” I keep my gaze on Jude and do as he says, letting the tropical waters lap up around my feet. With a seductive little wag, I draw him and the camera toward me and he keeps clic
king away, stepping closer and closer. Once my ankles hit the water, I drop down onto my knees and part my thighs alluringly, trying to show off the bikini bottom. I’m hardly an inch or two into the water, but it feels so refreshing against my skin. I sigh happily and dig my toes into the sand.

  “Good, Angel,” he whispers so that only I can hear.

  I love moving for him, and I blossom under his positive appraisal, wanting to please him even more. I want him to remember this image when he’s alone tonight.

  Playing off his confidence in me, I twine one hand through my hair and pull my head back gently while my other hand finds the strings on my bikini bottom. I tug down so that the bottom exposes another inch of my lower hip. The action should look sexy on camera, like I’m right in the moment of seduction— pulling the tiny string on my bikini and revealing everything. For Jude. He licks his bottom lip and I smile seductively into the lens before pulling another inch down.

  “Charley,” he warns quietly, but his husky voice turns me on even more.

  “Good!” Ryan yells from a few feet away, oblivious to Jude’s behavior.

  But I don’t need Ryan’s encouragement anymore. I’m a woman trying to seduce a man and my body knows what to do. I lean back, letting the salty water drench my hair and bathing suit so that the material clings to my skin even more.

  “Stay down like that, Charley,” Jude orders, stepping over my ankles and coming to stand above me. His foot hits my leg beneath the water and the touch electrifies my skin. I follow his instructions, letting my legs fall open a few inches so that he can see the thin material between my legs. I reach back and prop my hands into the sand, supporting my upper body. My back twists and I arch up until I see the muscles tighten in his jaw. I love affecting him like this, especially after how he left things last night. I’m exacting my revenge and driving us both insane. My eyes narrow seductively and my lips part, pleading with Jude to push me back into the sand and take me right here.

  “Damn, Charley,” Ryan huffs.

  I want to push the limits; I want to see how far Jude will let me go. It feels like a high-stakes poker game. Who’s going to fold first? With one hand still stuck in the sand, I reach up with the other and tug down the middle of my bandeau top ever so gently. I wouldn’t have revealed anything, just another millimeter of my skin, but Jude doesn’t let me.

  “Enough,” he snaps, dropping the camera away from his face and revealing his losing hand.

  “What! Are you insane?” Ryan huffs with wide eyes.

  I drop down into the sand and sit frozen, volleying my eyes between the two men.

  “We’ve got everything,” Jude responds sharply.

  Ryan’s arm shoots out to gesture toward me. “She was completely working the camera!” he protests. Jude doesn’t look at him; he’s staring down at me with fire behind his blue eyes. He’s pissed and he’s not even trying to hide it from me.

  “Fine. But there better be some damn good photos on that camera,” Ryan relents, resting his hands on his hips.

  “There are,” Jude snaps roughly, glancing at him and then turning back toward me with frigid ferocity. “Can I talk to you for a second before you head in, Charley?”

  I nod because my body is already conditioned to respond to this man. Not to mention, his tone wouldn’t have allowed any other response. I haven’t even fully processed the situation, and as I glance toward Ryan, his furrowed brows reveal that he’s trying to catch up as well.

  Sinking my fingers into the sand, I push up to stand on shaky legs. I try to brush some of the sand off the back of my thighs. Out of the corner of my lashes, I watch Ryan walk away from us to prepare for the next model, but I still can’t look at Jude. I keep my eyes focused on the grains of white sand spread across my feet like glassy constellations. He’s standing a few inches in front of me. Is he angry with me?

  “Charley, look at me,” he demands.

  My eyes stay focused on a speck of sand stuck to the side of my ankle, at least I know it won’t burn me with its gaze.

  “Please.” His voice is impossible to resist, like licking chocolate off the spoon before you clean the bowl.

  With a deep breath, I raise my eyes until I’m glancing at him from underneath my lashes. The moment I find his ocean blue eyes, I cross my arms over my chest, feeling vulnerable in front of him and suddenly wishing I had my small robe again. His chuckle is pure sin, reminding me that a moment ago I was revealing every ounce of myself for him, but at least he holds his tongue.

  “Is everything okay?” I ask with an unsteady voice, trying to gage his mood.

  He presses his eyelids closed for a moment, and I can tell he’s trying to reel in his emotions.

  “We’ll talk about it later,” he answers simply as his eyes flutter open, revealing stormy blue irises.

  “Some of the models are getting together after the shoot…” I trail off, not sure why I’m even announcing those plans to him— maybe so he won’t have to feel bad if he wants to cancel on me now?

  His jaw clenches. “Is that what you’d like to do?”

  “Um, I’d rather go swimming,” I offer, toeing the line of honesty.

  “You can go swimming with them,” he answers pointedly, and I can tell he’s annoyed.

  Damn him. Damn him for always making me reveal my cards when I just want to hide behind the veil of his desires. I like when he demands and orders. Being near him makes me feel vulnerable, like I’m playing on empty train tracks, but telling him my true feelings is like leaping off a platform toward an oncoming engine.

  “I’d like to go to where you were exploring yesterday, if you’re still up for it?” That’s the best I can do; I can give him the truth, but I have to give him an out to cover my bases.

  He eyes me as if he can see through the cracks in my facade and then unpeels a knowing smile. “I’ll come find you after the shoot wraps.”

  My face lights up, publishing my excitement to the world, but I don’t care. “I’ll grab some food for us since it’ll probably be close to dinner time.”

  “Sounds good. I’ll eat anything you’d like, just make sure you keep that suit on, Charley,” he commands, fleetingly sweeping his gaze down my body. His blue eyes gleam in the Hawaiian sun.

  “I’ll see what I can do,” I quip, winking playfully, glad that the old Jude finally revealed himself once again.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  Charley

  “I didn’t expect him to ask his two friends to join, but it was too late by then! So I just went with the flow.” Victoria eyes scan across to each of us and then she grins wildly. “Let’s just say that every girl should experience that once in her life.” She waggles her eyebrows and all the girls erupt in laughter.

  “Ah! You’re insane,” Bella laughs next to me.

  “Hey, when in Rome.” She shrugs playfully and takes a sip of her martini.

  “You were in Brazil!” Bella shouts, eliciting another round of laughs.

  Bella dragged me down to the hotel bar earlier so I could hangout with the girls while I waited for Jude. He texted me when the shoot wrapped a few minutes ago, but he wanted to head to his room to shower, so I told him he could find me at the bar. After my part of the shoot was over, I cleaned up and threw on a pair of short, faded jean cutoffs and a slinky blue tank top. Yes, of course I left the white bikini on.

  I wasn’t sure where to get our dinner, but when I called the concierge, the hotel offered to bring a picnic up for me. I was nervous about ordering since I have no knowledge of what Jude prefers, but hopefully he’ll be too hungry to care. At least the hotel tucked our food into a small cooler. That way I could hide it in my bohemian bag so none of the girls would ask about it.

  As soon as I finished packing the cooler up and sliding on my strappy sandals, Bella knocked on my door.

  “Have you ever been to Brazil, Charley?” Victoria asks, drawing me back to the present. She tips back her martini until it’s bone dry and I watch her bite the olives off the
toothpick as I shake my head.

  “No, but it’s definitely on my bucket list. Especially after that story,” I joke.

  She smiles wide and cheers, “Yes! I bet you’ll get to go sooner than you think. Especially after your cover. You’ll get booked for all sorts of jobs around the world.”

  I nod, soaking in her words, “I might actually try to lay low for a while.”

  My declaration causes frantic stirring around the table. “What?”— “Why?”— “To build your mysterious vibe?”— “That’s crazy!”

  I shake my head, twisting the cocktail napkin in my hand. “Just for personal reasons.”

  “But there are girls who would kill to be in your position, Charley,” Victoria presses.

  Would they? Have I?

  I don’t know how the conversation became directed at my career decisions, but I’m starting to wonder if I shouldn’t have come with Bella. Thankfully, she notices my discomfort.

  “Victoria! Tell us another one of your stories. Maybe about Vespa Boy? Didn’t you guys sneak into the Eiffel Tower after it closed?” And just like that, the tables back to laughing and the attention is no longer on me. I recline back in my chair and try to immerse myself in Victoria’s story. But a moment later, I feel the energy in the bar change. It’s as if every free electron in my body is being drawn to a positive force. I don’t even have to turn; I know Jude walked into the bar, and my instincts are confirmed when his scent wraps around me like an intoxicating wave. It’s fresh and completely male.

  But before I can turn to see him, I feel his warm hands engulf my shoulders and a pair of lips press against my shoulder blade. Holy hell. His kiss sends fireworks through me and I know he can feel me tremble beneath his hands. He just kissed me in front of all the girls, and as expected, their eyes are wide with wonder and confusion. Martinis freeze mid-way to gaping mouths and I know I shouldn’t turn around and see how devastatingly handsome he looks. I should just revel in this ignorant bliss, but I can’t. I need to see him.