Tiger Born

by Tressie Lockwood

  Deja pulled the front door of Ward’s offices open and peeked around it. The wide hall sat empty, and she stepped inside. The cool interior was a welcome change from the heat of the Texas sun, and she ran a hand over her damp forehead. The walls had been painted a mustard yellow, and the framed paintings on them consisted of various scenes of wild horses running. A few lakesides graced some, and one or two long, narrow tables with faux flowers as centerpieces completed the decor. Even still, she knew Heath would feel trapped in this place. He’d be running a finger inside his shirt collar and tugging on the hair at the back of his head as if attacked by bugs. She smiled thinking of it. Poor man. She needed to rescue him.

  Voices to her left in the first room caught her attention. She started walking but fell back a step and staggered against the wall. A strong scent permeated the air and burned her nostrils. She slapped a hand over her nose and mouth, eyes watering.

  “Carter, you idiot,” Joe shouted from somewhere nearby. “Damn it, that burns! I can’t smell a thing now.”

  “Sorry, Joe,” came Carter’s muffled voice. “Packs a punch, doesn’t it? Only way to get the paint off. It will die down soon.”

  “You better hope so and that my sense of smell isn’t damaged, or I’m going to have your hide.”

  Dizzy from the fumes, Deja moved on, holding herself up using the wall. The next room appeared to be empty, so she kept going. The kitchen lay on the right hand side. She didn’t bother looking in. As she approached the last door, she heard Heath’s voice, and her heartbeat kicked up a notch in anticipation of seeing him. For one moment, she forgot the horrible smell and smiled, but then her head started spinning, and she covered her mouth and nose again.

  Heath came into view through the doorway, looking sexy as hell in his gray slacks. Damn, he has a nice ass. When she took a step in his direction, that’s when she noticed where his hand lay—on the arm of that skank Tina.

  “Are you okay?” Heath asked her.

  The color seemed to have drained from Tina’s face, and she sagged toward Heath but kept her balance. “I think so. My nose might be broken though.”

  Heath chuckled. Deja gave him credit for resisting the effects of the paint thinner. “That sounds like something Deja would say.”

  Deja smiled hearing that she occupied his mind, yet something made her hesitate to step into the room and interrupt them. Heath saw Tina to a chair and walked behind the desk to grab a couple tissues from a box. He handed one to Tina, who pressed it to her nose with her thanks.

  “This isn’t for you, is it?” she asked him. “This life?”

  Heath hesitated and then sighed. “No, it’s not. Don’t get me wrong, I love the people of Siberia.”

  “Just not in your face twenty-four seven with their problems?”

  Heath ran a hand over the back of his head. “How can you tell? I used to own a ranch, and I loved every backbreaking bit of it.”

  Tina made a face, pushing out a pouty bottom lip. “Aw, you’ll get one again. If anyone can get the approval to add those acres to Siberia, it’s Ward. He’d do anything for you.”

  Deja gritted her teeth. Just how did Ms. Thing know so much about what Ward was doing for Heath?

  “In the meantime, you have Deja.” Tina smiled, and Deja softened a little toward her. Maybe she wasn’t after her man. Tina went on, “I hear you two are having trouble though.”

  Heath hitched his shoulders and sat on the edge of his desk. “We’re getting married after we bring your cousin back.”

  Tina stilled, and her gaze drifted toward the window to the left of Heath’s desk. The hopeful thinking that she had no interest in Heath went out the window. The woman forced a smile if ever Deja saw one. “Before you know it you’ll have little cubs running around.”

  “Not with all I’ve seen.” Heath shook his head and frowned. “Everything is too unstable, too dangerous. When I went into McAllen with Ward, there was an incident.”

  “What kind of incident?”

  “The son of one of our couples was almost kidnapped when he and his family were there shopping. He’s only six. His mother managed to fight off the men and sustained a few bruises. She did all she could to save her son without changing and giving away what she was.”

  “You don’t mean…”

  “Yes, the men who came after them were human.”

  “It could have been a coincidence, just bad people looking to blackmail his parents for money,” Tina suggested.

  “Maybe.”

  “You don’t think so?”

  Heath grunted. “What Ward worries about is the person behind it.”

  Deja stepped back away from the door and leaned against the wall. She slid down it until she stooped with her head dropped against her knees. Her blood roared in her ears, making it near impossible to hear anymore. Taking in shallow breaths because of the fumes still clogging the air, she struggled to calm down. Heath never told her what he’d just shared with Tina. He never even hinted at it.

  When she’d gotten a grip, she tuned in again to the conversation. Heath was still speaking. “Even if Deja and I are bonded, I won’t have kids.”

  “If?”

  Heath didn’t respond, but Deja had heard all she could bear. She stood up and stumbled back down the hall. All the happy energy she’d arrived with that morning seeped away and left her empty. Not only did Heath confide in another woman, he just said he would never have kids with her, and he questioned whether they were bonded at all. She left city hall and wandered down the street, not sure where she headed, just sure she needed to get away. After some moments, she pulled out her cell phone and dialed Melanie. Her friend picked up on the first ring.

  “Hey, what are you doing for lunch?” Deja asked her.

  “Nothing. I don’t go in until late this afternoon.”

  “Wanna meet me at Jake’s? I think they sell sandwiches during the day, but I need a drink.”

  “What’s going on?”

  Deja sighed. “I’ll tell you when we get there. I want to talk to Jake too, get the male perspective.”

  “Okay, twenty minutes?”

  “Sure.” Deja disconnected and paused when her cell phone rang again. She started to answer but checked the ID. Heath’s name flashed on the screen. She swiped a finger across the screen to reject the call since she had no idea yet what she wanted to say to him. Fifteen minutes later, she arrived at Jake’s bar and walked inside. Jake stood behind the counter wiping it down, and she crossed the empty dance floor to sit on her favorite stool. “Shot.”

  Jake frowned. “This early? Are you okay?”

  “No.”

  “Wanna talk about it?”

  “Not yet. Shot.”

  He set a small glass of amber liquid before her, and she downed the contents. Her throat burned and eyes watered, and she slammed the glass on the bar. “Another.”

  “Not yet,” he echoed her earlier words. “What’s going on, Deja?”

  The tears she’d held back fell from her eyes, and Jake froze. He reached out to touch her cheek, but before his palm brushed her skin, the front door opened again. Deja didn’t have to turn around to know it was Melanie. Her nose had started working. She scrubbed her face dry.

  Melanie walked up behind her and touched her shoulder. She took the spot next to Deja. “What’s going on?”

  For some reason, Deja felt a little better. She had a girlfriend. She and Melanie weren’t that close yet, but give it time and they could become like sisters. She hoped so. She had no family, and if for some reason she and Heath didn’t work out, she wanted someone in her corner. She already knew Jake was on her side.

  “Jake, you sell sandwiches, don’t you?”

  He nodded. “I can put in an order for you. Here’s a menu.”

  He set a single laminated sheet before each of them, but Deja wasn’t hungry. The fact that she ordered and made sure Melanie chose what she wanted and had a drink attested to the partial numbness after overhearing Heath and Tina�
��s conversation. What she’d be like alone at her apartment, she didn’t know.

  “Are you going to talk, or am I going to have to tickle it out of you?” Jake teased.

  Melanie looked from him to Deja and back again. Deja could guess her friend put it together in a heartbeat that Jake liked her. She sighed and told them all that she’d overheard. She didn’t give a damn whether the information about what happened in the city was confidential or not. After all, Heath had found no reason not to share it with Tina. Deja wondered how the woman made her money to live. Maybe from several lovers.

  Melanie put a hand up to her mouth. Eyes wide. “I can’t believe… You’re saying there might be a plot against the born shifters?”

  Deja opened her mouth to answer, but Jake cut her off. “That’s not the point, is it? The fact that a shifter was almost grabbed by humans means the tension is only going to rise once the word gets out. Heath wasn’t very smart to tell Tina.”

  Deja gritted her teeth and tapped her glass on the bar to indicate she needed more drink. “That’s not the only reason Heath isn’t smart!”

  “I’m sorry, Deja.” Melanie touched her hand. “Yeah, he’s an idiot for confiding in another woman and not you. The fastest way to grow closer to another person is to share the bad stuff with them.”

  “Right?” Deja demanded. “I’m saying! He’s an idiot.” She glanced at Jake and noted the light in his eyes, wondering what that was about. When he saw her looking, his expression became unreadable, and he popped open a beer for her.

  “Well, we are your friends, and we’re here for you,” Jake promised. “No tension between the species is going to mess that up. Deal?”

  Deja smiled, and her eyes watered. “Deal. Thanks so much, guys. Now, tell me, would I be stupid to stay with him?”

  “Hell, yes!” they echoed together.

  She blinked at the intensity from the two of them but took Jake’s opinion with a grain of salt. Toying with her bottle, she said, “I know, and I want to let go. I should even back out on this damn mission to get Tina’s cousin. I can’t pretend I care, and I know that’s so wrong.”

  “You don’t have to feel guilty.” Melanie hugged her.

  Deja dipped her head low and shut her eyes. “He’s under my skin.”

  “Doesn’t that mean you two are mated?”

  “One minute I think so, and the next… It’s obvious Heath doesn’t think so. He said as much to that bitch. Damn it! I feel like they’ve been seeing each other behind my back. He’s telling her stuff about us—about me and about how he feels.”

  “You’re telling us the same thing,” Jake interjected. She glared at him, and he held up his hands in surrender. Another patron walked into the bar, and Jake moved away to serve him. When he returned, he pulled no punches. “He messed up. It might have been nothing, or it might have been the beginning of something between them. What you could do is…”

  “What?” Her stomach turned, and when her food came, she didn’t touch a bite of it. Melanie ate with delicate movements, and Deja tried picturing the woman with rough, clumsy Carter and couldn’t.

  “You could see if he comes clean about Tina, maybe prod him a little. I wouldn’t come right out and confront him. Men never admit to anything when forced.” Jake’s expression turned sheepish. “Hint around, give him an opening. If he admits it, you’ll know where you stand. If he doesn’t—”

  “Crucify him,” Melanie blurted.

  Deja laughed. “Alrighty then. I guess I have a plan.”

  * * * *

  As much as she’d smiled and joked with her friends for the better part of an hour, when Deja left the bar and walked alone on the street, the weight of her relationship with Heath bore down heavy on her shoulders. Bile rose in her throat every time she recalled how Heath had touched Tina’s arm, so tender with her when she looked like she would faint, and the way they had talked together so easily. To be fair, she’d had a great time with him on their date and when he asked her to marry him. Goodness knows their sex life was spot-on. None of it changed how crazy it was that they didn’t trust their feelings for each other. It’s just insane. We were best friends for years.

  She’d heard of friends having trouble making the transition to lovers, but this wasn’t a simple case like that. They were also adjusting to a second nature that fought for dominance seemingly twenty-four seven. To trust in the tiger, to know what it felt, was more real than the human side of them? That felt impossible and unbelievable.

  She spent the day visiting various shops, avoiding answering her cell phone or going home. When her feet hurt, she went to the library to use one of the computers to surf the Internet. The act took her back to the time when she and Heath were on the run and she’d taken a chance to contact Ward in the hope of helping Heath find out who and what he was. For a few moments, she expected him to come find her as he’d done back then. He never showed up, and when the sun started going down in the sky, she made her way home.

  Heath sat on the top step outside her door. Her stomach knotted when she saw him, and her heart beat faster. No matter what happened between them, she loved the sight of the man.

  As she approached, he stood up. “Where have you been, Deja? I tried calling you.”

  Sensing his pain was a punch to her gut. She steeled her resolve. “I had a lot going on.”

  “Like what?” His slightly angry gaze studied her face, and she moved past him to unlock the door to give herself time. When they stepped inside, he grasped her by the wrist as if she’d had plenty of time, and it was more than enough. She tugged away, using the excuse that she needed to drop her bags and shut the door.

  “Deja!”

  She gritted her teeth. “I came by the office today. I was going to invite you to lunch.”

  “I didn’t see you. Ward dragged me out to settle a dispute.”

  She tensed. “Anything serious?”

  They moved into her tiny kitchen, and she took a out bowl of spaghetti, leftovers from a couple days ago.

  “Just two idiots arguing. Sometimes they let the tiger get the better of them. Happens on the hottest days.” He touched her cheek. “Are you upset we couldn’t have lunch? I promise I’ll make time. Just let me know when you’re coming.”

  Deja slammed the bowl on the counter. “So you can get rid of any visitors?”

  He frowned. “Well, yeah, I guess.”

  “Don’t lie to me, Heath!”

  “I’m not lying. What the hell, Deja? Just spit out what the problem is, and I’ll fix it.”

  “You’ll fix it? Did you just tell me you’ll fix it?”

  He threw up his hands sighing and walked back to the living room. She followed, hands on her hips and temper rising by the second.

  “Do you have something going on with Tina?” Damn, there went subtle. Jake had told her to give him an opening and let him choose to reveal what he wanted. He’d been specific about her not driving Heath into a corner because he would deny everything and tell her nothing.

  Heath’s eyes widened, and his mouth fell open. “Why in the world would you think that?”

  “Are you?”

  “No, of course not. You are my fiancée. I thought we worked everything out last night.”

  She ignored that statement. “Is there anything you want to tell me regarding Tina or…or…about your work?” Okay, that was lame. She had no idea how he would figure out what in the world she talked about now, yet she saw when comprehension hit him. Anger flared in his eyes.

  “I think you need to trust me.”

  “That’s your answer?”

  He stepped closer to her, but she retreated one. “Tell me you believe I would never stoop so low as to cheat on you.”

  “You haven’t answered my question.”

  He sighed. “Deja, I love you. I always will. You know that. Tina is a good person, but she’s no more than a friend. I don’t know what else I can say to help you see that. I want you to move back home tonight. Most of your thin
gs are still there.”

  Deja returned to the kitchen and stared down at the cold spaghetti. She’d forgotten she hadn’t yet bought a microwave, so she would have to heat the spaghetti on the stove. Adding a little milk to the mixture would keep it from sticking and not dilute the flavor like water would. Either way, she’d lost her appetite, and her stomach churned.

  She believed Heath that he had no sexual involvement with Tina. He had still confided a very serious issue to her rather than to Deja, and he flat out said he would never have kids. The night before, he let Deja believe there was a chance down the line, after they were married. She’d been naïve and stupid.

  With trembling hands, she put the bowl of spaghetti back inside the refrigerator. Heath faced her on the opposite side of the counter that separated the kitchen from the living room. She looked up at him, holding herself steady with supreme effort.

  “I’m going to come by and get all the rest of my things. I-it’s a good thing we hadn’t gotten a ring yet. You don’t have to spend the money. I’m calling it off. I’m sorry, Heath. I don’t want to marry you. In fact, I don’t want to see you at all. Please leave.”

  “Deja, what are you saying?”

  She heard the anguish in his tone, and it cracked her heart. A lump hard to breathe around lodged in her throat. Heath stepped toward her, but she held up her hand, and he stopped.

  He slammed a fist on the edge of the counter. She gaped as a chunk of it broke off and fell to the floor. “You said you’d always be by my side, didn’t you? You would follow me anywhere!”

  When she could find her voice, it refused to rise more than a whisper. “Things change.”

  “De—”

  “Leave! Get out! Please!”

  Heath stood unmoving for a long time, and then he spun on his heel, walked across the living room, and wrenched the door open. The stupid squeak in the hinge mocked her as he disappeared. Deja sank down to the floor for the second time that day and this time cried her eyes out.

  Chapter Seven

  Tonight no rain fell, and Heath managed to avoid putting another hole in the wall. He’d already patched up the last one. The quiet house mocked him. Without Deja, he hated everything about the place. He’d wanted her to trust him, to stay no matter how difficult it was for the two of them to overcome their issues. Yet, her solution had been to leave, to stay in that piece of crap apartment. Seeing her there in a space that one could never call a home—more like a closet—with a front door that squeaked and a lock on it which seemed questionable to him, he could not understand it. He wanted her home, where she belonged, but he would not force her.