The Rewind Series Boxset

by Jill Cooper

  “Then we find a way to fix it. And get her back in there. We’ve come too far with her to stop now. She cannot be allowed to terminate. No one sleeps, no one gets time off until we find a way to fix Lara.”

  Chapter Six

  I know it’s not possible for Rex to care about me after all he’s subjected me to, but his voice sounds like he does on several occasions. It’s hard to accept the truth that to him I am simply valuable as a possession or a high valued experiment. That in itself buys me some leeway. But I am too weak to do much about it.

  In the coming days, I am well fed and cared for. Potted plants are brought into my room and under supervision they give me a CD player. It’s nice to listen to music again even if they don’t allow me a computer or access to the internet. That would be too dangerous and for now I’m glad I’m not tempted to find a way out. If I managed to escape in my current condition, I probably wouldn’t make it anywhere.

  The calendar on the table shows that over a week has passed since the incident. I haven’t been plugged back into the virtual reality since then and I know we’re getting close to trying again. The new treatments Rex has authorized are helping. My brain feels more whole and I know soon we’ll be forced to test it. Then and only then will we be able to move into phase two.

  A real world test.

  I mark another day off the calendar with a big red X as I prepare for bed and put the marker down beside it. The lights in the giant room that houses my cage deactivate and I hear footsteps approaching. Getting comfortable in bed, I snuggle my pillow and pull the comforter up high. I might be in a cage, but part of me feels at peace under the fluffy down comforter. Almost like I’ve begun to accept my life here.

  Deep inside me there’s a longing to see Donovan and my family again. I don’t want to face the fact that I am excited to be plugged back into the system tomorrow, but I am. I want to return to the virtual world and it brings tears to my eyes even if they don’t drop down to my cheeks.

  The guard finishes his sweep around the room and he pauses at the glass wall that separates us. For a moment he studies me in the dark, only his flashlight illuminates a small part of his face.

  “Good night, Lara,” he says with kindness. A strange kindness for a man who knows I’m being held here against my will.

  But I smile at him anyway. I crave any human kindness. “Good night.” Then I roll over and go to sleep.

  Tomorrow is a new day. A celebration. And I will finally get to see my family again.

  ****

  It’s my birthday.

  I lean over and blow out the one candle sticking out of my waffle. I don’t have much in the way of cheer, but I hope that soon I’ll be able to really celebrate. Rex is standing on the other side of the glass and he puts a small wrapped box inside of the plastic container.

  Curious as to what it could be, I open the container from my side of the cage and hold the small box in my hands. It’s wrapped in white and pink ‘happy birthday’ paper and a green bow rests delicately on top. I give the box a soft shake and it barely rattles inside. “Well, at least it’s not a bomb.”

  Rex’s expression shows anything but amusement. “Just open it, darling Lara.”

  I tear the paper and lift the flap of the box. Inside is a photo and as I unfold it my heart lodges in my throat. It’s Molly. Her hair is swept back and her eyes are gazing down at the floor with sadness. She’s not smiling at all, but instead wears a serious frown. No little girl so young should look so sad at seven years old.

  “What do you want from me?” I hold the photo like a delicate flower and I’m afraid at any moment it might turn to dust and simply blow away.

  “You wanted proof she’s all right. Here it is.” Rex says.

  “This doesn’t prove anything except how miserable she is. What are you doing to her?” My eyes narrow. “You have me, just let her go.”

  “We are headed toward our first real world test, Lara. I just wanted to remind you what’s at stake. Keep this in mind the next time we see each other. And happy eighteenth birthday. You’re an adult now.” His smile makes me shiver and then he sneers at the technicians. “Strap her back in. Give her a birthday she’ll never forget.”

  I sit down on my bed and lay down on my pillow, sliding the photo of Molly underneath. I lay still as the technician in my room readies the equipment. I close my eyes and am ready to fall down the rabbit hole.

  ****

  “Happy birthday!”

  I gasp with surprise, my hand on my chest as I walk into the front door. My heart skips a beat as the lights turn on and all of my friends and family toot horns and throw streamers at me. The room is decorated with pink and white balloons. Blushing, I laugh and turn to Donovan. “You knew?”

  “Happy birthday,” he hushes against my skin and kisses my open mouth. My eyes flutter open and I fall so deliriously into him, I’m ready never to leave the virtual world again. His embrace is so magical. Why would I ever want to be anywhere else?

  I can barely separate myself from him as I go over to greet my family. My dad. He’s having a polite conversation with my mom. Something I never thought I would see again. “Dad.” I grin.

  He gives me one of his patent pending bear hugs. “Oh, baby girl. It’s so great to be with you on a birthday finally. So great. And to see you so happy.”

  I know I’m beaming. Now, without Senator James around, there’s no reason not to be. Donovan and I are free to begin our lives. The prospect of college has never seemed so mundane—and it excites me. I have had enough heart-pounding adrenaline to last me two lifetimes. Quite literally.

  As I hug my family and friends, the subject of Donovan’s mom never comes up and it shouldn’t. My alibi cleared the police weeks ago. I can barely remember being interviewed by them except I know it happened. The fact I can travel time is a secret only a few key people know and I’m glad the police have never found out because, if they did, then all bets would be off.

  So I smile at my friends and family. I swing Mike and Molly around when they charge at me with balloons. When the cake is wheeled out by Mom, I grin so wide my skin feels like it’s going to crack. It’s a giant, six layer buttercream tower, decorated with pink and white edible flowers. If a girl’s going to dream up the most gorgeous cake to celebrate the day, this is it.

  “Make a wish.” Mom smiles at me from across the flickering candles. “And make it a good one.”

  I close my eyes and blow. When I do so I feel something prick the back of my neck, but when I grab it nothing is there. I turn around and don’t see anyone behind me except for a group of friends. They are clapping and I’m sure whatever I just felt isn’t of their making.

  After the presents are all open and people start to leave the party, it’s just me and Jax in the kitchen. We scrape the leftover cake into a container and pile the pink paper plates into the recycling bin.

  “Hey look.” Jax pulls a present off of the counter. “I swear this wasn’t here a minute ago. Why don’t you open it?” He slides it toward me.

  Interesting. I pick the present up. It’s wrapped in shiny purple foil wrapping paper with a black bow. The tag says it’s from a friend. A friend. I rip the paper off and lift the lid off the gift. Inside I see a purple wig with sharply cut bangs. Underneath it is a card.

  I’m still here. I still exist. You haven’t changed anything. Get busy—LCM

  Lara Crane Montgomery.

  My future is still out there and she’s pissed.

  Jax raises his eyebrows. “Well, that’s an interesting gift.”

  “You don’t know the half of it.” I lay the card on top, close the box and dump it in the trash in a huff. I take a deep, shaking breath. I don’t know what she wants. I don’t know how to stop what is happening.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “I think I just want to be alone.” I rush past Jax out of the kitchen and run up the stairs to my bedroom. I don’t know what I’m going to do as I fling myself down on my b
ed. I need to make a plan, but when I roll over all I see are the two plane tickets on my dresser.

  Destination Florida. Not exactly Morocco, but any vacation would be a great vacation. And one I couldn’t wait to take.

  Chapter Seven

  The vacation is everything I think it will be and that’s the problem.

  Rex is fulfilling every dream, every secret wish I’ve had. Even the flight is magical, riding in first class with elegant meals and sweet, non-alcoholic drinks. We have plenty of leg room and the clouds look like fluffy cotton balls as our plane glides through the day’s sky.

  Florida is hot, humid and just sticky enough so that it makes our time in the pool perfect. Hours tick by as we enjoy gourmet meals, relaxing days in the sun. Before you know it we’re on our last night at the ocean resort. On the beach we walk the coast and the moonlight glistens across the soft waves. The foamy current splashes my toes.

  My hand is in Donovan’s and the longer we walk, the more I feel he’s not really there. His mind is a million miles away. What is he thinking? Is he tired of being here with me?

  I rest my head on his shoulder and it’s like he can read my mind. “I’ve been looking for a perfect moment to ask you.” Donovan takes both my hands and I turn to face him. Reservation lines my face and I lick my lips.

  “But—” Donovan takes a deep, laboring sigh “—I’ve realized after everything, we make our own moments. And I want our moments to keep on going. I want more moments. Happy ones and not the craziness of the last year.”

  I’m afraid he might be breaking up with me. My face falls. “Don, if you could give me another chance—”

  “Oh Lara, no, you’re all I want. You have nothing to be sorry for.” He runs his hand through his hair. “I guess I’m doing this wrong because I’m trying to ask you to marry me.”

  My heart skips and I stare at him with a fallen jaw. “Marry?”

  Donovan goes down on his knee and there’s a black box in his hand I didn’t see before. When he pops it open, the moonlight casts a twinkle off the diamond ring inside the box. A laugh gets lodged inside my throat and I’m not sure, but I think there are tears in my eyes.

  “Well say something.” Donovan half smiles. “I can’t stay down here forever.”

  I don’t know what to say, but I nod. “Yes,” I say breathlessly. He stands up, sweeps me up in his arms and swoops me down to the side like we’re in a private dance. I cling on to him as our lips meet and realize marrying Donovan, moving forward, is everything.

  Everything.

  The next morning we get ready to board the plane and my mind reels from how real this all is. The latches on my suitcase snatch closed with the sound of a metal clang. Everything seems so real, so perfect.

  But when I glance at the clock and see the hands spinning backwards, I know it isn’t. This place is anything but perfect. It’s prison and it’s torture.

  Just when I am ready to stay in the virtual reality forever and give up on my life, I am pulled back. It’s like I have gone from living in vibrant HD and now I am pulled down the rabbit trail in old fashioned mono. The harsh starkness hits me like a sterile plexi-glass cage from which I cannot escape.

  I promised myself I would never want my virtual reality more than real life, that I would not fall for the dreams, but now I know that’s not true. I’m faltering.

  Sitting on the edge of my bed, I stare out past my cage at the vast, white walls. Security paces back and forth, but no one acknowledges me. I’m nothing more than a lab rat. No one here cares if I live or die. If I’m happy or sad, if it doesn’t relate to the experiment. That deep longing, that deep sadness for something more, weighs my heart down like an anchor.

  I’m sinking and sinking and there’s no one around to care. Everyone I care about is gone.

  My despair is deep, but Rex can never know. If he does, I’m done. My hand squeezes a fist full of tissues and I dot at my eyes. A giant breath expands my chest as I sit up straighter and, when I stand, something on the back of my head tugs at my skin. It stills my breath and I realize something is pinching the back of my head.

  My hand reaches behind my curls at my neck and swipes against something against my skin. It feels like metal, something jetting out from my skin. When I try to tug it off, I feel a pulling coming from deep underneath my skin. My fingers tremble as I realize it’s not just attached to me, it’s embedded under my skin.

  Pulling my hair up, I grab my mirror and use it to cast a reflection on the back of the plexi-glass panels surrounding me. My breath catches in my throat at the sight of a port in the base of my skull. It’s like I have a USB port directly tied into my brain.

  My vision splits and my blood pressure rockets. Trembling, I fall to my knees and my stomach threatens to spill its breakfast contents onto the floor. Instead I dry heave, clench my stomach with my fingers, and my skin flushes hot with rage. Rex has turned me into a thing. An object. I’m nothing more than a science experiment with its cable and cord.

  Isn’t it bad enough that I’m locked away from everything I know, plugged into a virtual reality for weeks at a time, getting nutrients from a damn IV and plastic bag?

  Now they did this to me, for what? To delete or add any memory they want directly into my brain. I can’t even trust my own memory recall anymore.

  Sobbing, my eyes fall to the newspapers Rex has given me. My dreams fade like fog through the harsh light of day. Sunlight is supposed to be warm and bring the promise of a new beginning, but my day always starts with regret. And the reality of life, my choices, is too much for me to take. My hand trembles as I cover my eyes and am desperate for the screams and sorrow to leave me alone.

  All there is for certain is the knowledge I have a port wired directly into my brain and I don’t know how. I don’t know when they did it, but I guess that’s why they gave me such a long summer vacation. They were doing research and surgery on my brain.

  My hands clench into tight little fists and I can’t deny myself the scream any longer. I shot up in rage and throw my body against the glass. My shoulder fires off with intense pain and I fall down to the floor.

  “I can explain, Lara. If you give me half a moment.”

  Rex. I grit my teeth and throw my hair back.

  “I don’t want to see you.” I can’t keep the hate and seething anger out of my voice. “Get out of here.”

  Rex places his hand on the glass. “We’ve made an incredible breakthrough, Lara. A way for the computer systems here to sooth your brain. Help you with the time travel transition so it doesn’t have to hurt. Wouldn’t you love to change time and not have to deal with the headaches? The bloody noses? I know how bad it was for you last time.”

  “You have no right to modify me like this.” I shake as I push up to my feet. “It’s my body. You have no right.”

  “Lara—” There’s a warning tone to his voice, but he has no right to warn me of anything.

  I need to get out of here now. My skin itches like a thousand little ants marching across my skin. My lip snarls. “Let me out of here.”

  Rex holds up his hands. “Lara, now just calm down.”

  “Stop saying my name like we’re friends. Let me out!” I scream and the space around me reverberates against the glass. For some reason it sounds very loud. I clamp my hands over my ears. The lights intensify and the nerves in my gut boil. I can’t help but think of the night I was captured. Without meaning to, I reach back in time and my vision starts to blur with the scene from under the bridge, from where I really last saw Donovan.

  But they yank me back hard and the pain in my brain sends me crashing to my knees. Up ahead on the ceiling the coils glow gold. They think they have me. They think I won’t want to feel that intense pain in my brain. I’m going to show them all. I’d rather be dead then their test rat any longer.

  So I do it again. I reach back and attempt to time travel and this time the pain is so intense that I yelp and fall onto the ground on all fours, barely able to hold
myself up with my shaking limbs.

  “Stop this, Lara. Stop it!” Rex insists and for the first time I hear panic in his voice.

  I raise my head and feel the blood trickling down my nose. “I’m no one’s bitch, Rex,” I whisper, my lip curling into a tremble.

  “Get in there. Sedate her,” Rex orders and snaps his finger. Orderlies rush around the cage and I hope they’re too late. I hope this is the final moment.

  “Stop it, Lara!” Delilah screams at me as her hand opens to grab my arm. Her eyes are afraid for me, but I can’t care anymore. If she cared so much about me, she would let me go.

  “I hope my brain fries.” I reach back to travel in time and my body shakes. The pain hits my head like a freight train. If it’s possible to feel your brain peeling away from your skull I feel it as I jolt onto my back. The white sneakers of the orderlies surround me.

  Someone grabs my arm and I stare up at the golden coils now so bright they burn like a hot stove. My body rocks as I attempt time travel again.

  The needle slips beneath my skin.

  My eyes close but I do it one more time for good measure and feel blood trickling out of my ears. I pray it’s the end. I pray I will feel nothing ever again.

  Death can be my only freedom now.

  ****

  When my eyes open again I’m in a bed. I glance around the room and immediately realize I’m not inside my cage. I’m somewhere else. It’s white and sterile with a privacy curtain drawn around me. Machines nearby give off a soft beep—beep. I must be in a hospital, or somewhere fashioned to work like a hospital.

  My fingers curl and pain shoots up my arm. I groan and sink against the pillows as everything in the room spins and swirls. I haven’t been that dizzy in a long time. A long time.

  There’s an IV in my arm and from the multiple puncture wounds that are starting to fade, I suspect I’ve been here for a week. Maybe more. Somehow Rex and his team of unethical bastards have managed to pull me back from the brink.