by Lari Smythe
Chapter 16
The rest of January flew by and before I knew it, we were halfway through February. Things were good at school and I learned that the girl's gossip about me was actually a good thing; it meant I was relevant. It was late February when I began to notice that Jason treated me different at home and at school—it was kind of opposite of the way it had been. At school—despite several warnings from Ms. Moore—he hung all over me, but away from school he was always too busy, either with homework or hanging out with the guys. To be honest, I was beginning to feel a little like an accessory.
"Let's do something tonight," I said as Jason and I walked out to his car after school.
"Augh, I don't know."
"You're not going to the batting cages again?"
"Tryouts start next week—I need all the swings I can get."
"What about me?"
He stared at my eyes momentarily. "Don't you have to like hunt or something?"
"Seriously!" I stopped abruptly.
"What?"
"I forgot my Algebra book."
"I could ride with Alex—leave you the Jeep if you want."
I glared. "I'll be fine."
"Yeah, you will."
I stomped back to the school. When I got to my locker, Lisa and one of her cheerleader friends were standing by the girl's locker. They glanced up at me and then continued their conversation in whispers.
"Yeah, Tammy and Eric are so over," Lisa said. "I told you, as soon as Eric wasn't getting any—"
"But I thought after they got caught—and Tammy's father forbid her—"
"Oh sure, the sneaking around made it exciting for awhile, but when Tammy crossed her legs, it was over."
"It's so like a guy—why'd she do it, I thought she really liked him?"
"Who knows, it's not like Eric was the first."
"No way!"
I turned away as they glanced toward me.
"I think she has her slutty little sights on Jason," Lisa said, her tone turning devious.
"No way she gets him away from the Emo gone runway."
"I don't know, you notice how they're not so attached anymore?"
"They look pretty attached to me—he hangs all over her."
"I know right—pathetic, but it definitely says to me that she's not putting out—that hanging is begging."
The girl thought for a moment. "Or, she's been putting out and he's tired of it—she is shacking up at his place."
"I'll give them till the end of the school year and he'll be finished with her." Lisa said. "Besides, I have my eye on him for senior year. Don't you think we'd make a perfect homecoming king and queen? You know, quarterback and cheer captain."
"But I thought you and Jason were just friends."
"I hate to admit it, but no way I was going to get him away from her last semester—some kind of fatal attraction—but friends keeps him close. Once he gets tired of her, he's all mine."
"Yeah, I could see that. Guys are so shallow."
They giggled when I slammed my locker, like they knew I was listening. I went to the Faulkner house instead of Jason's. He was right, I needed to hunt and listening to Lisa and her friend just added to the anger I was feeling over our little spat. I still had some clothes upstairs, so I changed before heading out—no need to ruin one of my nicer outfits.
The hunt took me further than normal—the relatively harsh winter had driven the deer deeper into the woods in search of food. It took two kills to quench my thirst because both animals were so anemic. Hunting never failed to remind me of what I was. Sure, I could pretend to be human—dress in nice clothes—look sexy even, but I was a predator. Maybe I wasn't as bad as other's of my kind—the ones that fed on humans, but I was still a monster. Even though they were always in my thoughts, this was also the time I thought the most about my family. I hoped they were alright, even prayed although I wasn't sure that was appropriate. It had been more than two months without a word.
As I disposed of the last carcass, I noticed I wasn't far from Melanie's cabin and the tranquil pool that got me through adjusting to Jason. I decided to check it out—see if it still had it's magic. When I got there, the first thing I noticed was the water was frozen—duh, it was winter. Of course the vegetation was gone too. It was no different than any other bend in the creek. I sat down on the ice near the rock wall where ice sickles that hung like daggers had replaced the gentle waterfall.
Were guys really like Lisa and her friend said? Is that why Jason picked out the clothes he did? I was just some kind of pretty bobble and the shine had worn off because we weren't having sex? The idea seemed ridiculous. Jason had driven all the way across country to save me from myself and then just a week later taken me to Georgia to help me make things right with the Faulkners. No way he did all that to get into my pants. We had an understanding that went beyond mere physical contact. He knew—we both knew the potential consequences if we went too far. Still he was human, and despite the myths about vampires being cold, heartless creatures, the super senses were not confined to just strength and speed—emotions—urges, my butterflies, were every bit as powerful. It was just as difficult—if not more so—for me to resist my urges as it was for Jason.
I got up and walked across the ice to the frozen sand on the opposite side. As I stepped off the ice, a huge ice sickle fell from the wall shattering into a million pieces. Was Lisa right? Was our relationship falling from what had been so perfect to shatter into a million pieces? I couldn't—I wouldn't survive it.
It was late when I got to Jason's. I lingered outside to make sure his mom wasn't around and when I was positive she was upstairs I slipped inside and went directly to my room. Maybe half an hour later, Jason came downstairs. He fumbled around in the kitchen for a little while, but eventually went back upstairs.
The next morning he didn't speak to me, even on the ride to school. He still walked me to classes, but he was less than enthusiastic. Like the rest of the day, the ride home was silent. Jason dropped me off and went to the batting cages again. His mom wasn't home, so I changed into my favorite sweats and watched television.
Jason and his mom got home about the same time later that evening. Jason went upstairs to shower while his mom started dinner. They were going to have soup again so I agreed to join them.
"Izzy, is there something wrong?" Mrs. Whitaker said.
"Wrong?" I muted the T.V. and twisted around on the sofa. "What do you mean?"
She glanced back at the stove and then walked over to the edge of the family room. "The last few days—well you seem very melancholy."
"Ah—well—I—uh—"
"It's just that when you're not happy I can tell it affects Jason. Perhaps it's that time of the month?" She blushed slightly. "I have some medicine that—"
"Yeah, it's always bad when it first starts." I covered, realizing what she meant. "I'll be alright."
Her eyes tightened, suspiciously. "Are you sure there's nothing else?"
I got up from the sofa. "Thanks for reminding me, I'm running low, I should probably run to the store. I'll grab something to eat while I'm out. Tell Jason I'm sorry."
"Alright." She turned and walked back to the stove.
Okay, so that was totally embarrassing. His mom thinks I'm a moody—that time of the month—beyotch. Great.
Jason and his mom were both still at the table when I returned. Jason eyed the semi transparent, plastic shopping bag as I walked toward them. "Seriously?"
"Cute," I continued past him toward my room.
"Jason!" His mother scolded. "You should be ashamed of yourself. Apologize this instant."
I hesitated at the edge of the family room.
"Sure, whatever." He half waved over his shoulder without turning to look at me.
His 'seriously' comment was actually funny, but the 'whatever' one hurt. "You should take another shower," I fired back. "You still smell."
"What'd you say?" He spun off the chair, sending it clattering across the floo
r.
"You're being a jerk," I stepped toward him aggressively.
"Yeah—well you're a freakin' prude." He puffed his chest at me.
That hurt—hurt a lot. To Jason's right, his mother's face had turned ashen.
"Ya dumb, jock!" I snarled. The rest happened so fast.
"Jason!" His mother screamed as he lunged at me.
I could have easily deflected his body away from me, or just stood there like a statue and let him crumble to the ground at my feet. I was so angry, for an instant I thought about throwing him through the wall—he knew I could do all of that, so what was with the attack? Why was he so angry? Why was I so angry? I stepped back, more or less just catching him, to make it look good.
"Oh my God!" His mother screamed as we crashed to the floor. Tampons rolled in every direction.
The look on Jason's face was—well, total shock—total what did I just do?—total I'm such a freakin' idiot shock. He pushed up to his knees, looked down at the scattered Tampons and started laughing—his defense mechanism.
"What in the world?" His mother grabbed him by the shoulder, pulling him away from me, and then stepped between us. She glanced over her shoulder at me. "Are you hurt?"
Calm, Izzy. Calm, Izzy. I was repeating over and over in my head, trying to rein in my anger. Jason's scent, laced with anger was over the top—his mother's didn't help matters. I had not experienced thirst of this intensity for months.
"Izzy! Are you alright?" Jason's mother repeated.
I slid away from them and grabbed a few Tampons to make it look good. "I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about those," Jason's mom said, "I'll take care of it."
Jason stood as I did. His pale expression was so pained—he was in shock.
"You stay put!" his mother warned.
"I'm fine, Mrs. Whitaker. I'm sorry."
She was staring at Jason now. "Nonsense, this wasn't your fault, Izzy."
"Do you want me to go?"
"Go?" She seemed surprised by the question. "We'll talk later."
I backed away from Jason's pleading gaze. We would have to figure this one out, but now definitely wasn't the time. I paused at the door to my room. "I'm sorry," I repeated and then slipped inside and closed the door behind me. I wasted no time escaping to the outdoors.
Later, when I returned to my room, Jason and his mother were talking quietly in the kitchen. I had to press my ear against the door because even Jason was trying to keep his voice down.
"No, Mom, that's not—capital letters NOT—what I want." His voice crept louder. "Don't you get it, Izzy and I belong together."
"Keep your voice down. I'm not saying you can't see each other," she sighed. "Jason, it seems to me that you've forgotten what's important. When your father was still with us all you two could talk about was high school, then college—football—"
"Mom, Mom, did you ever stop to think those were things Dad wanted? Listen, I'm not saying that those things don't matter to me, I'm just saying that maybe there not the most important."
A chair squeaked across the floor.
"Jason, I'm just trying to look out for your best interests."
"Mine, or yours? All I'm saying is if Izzy goes, I go."
"Jason, can't you see she's not—"
"Don't! Don't even think it." He stomped up the stairs and slammed his bedroom door.
I waited until I was sure he wasn't coming back before I opened my bedroom door.
"Ah!" Mrs. Whitaker shrieked. She was standing just outside the door.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."
"No, of course not." She looked embarrassed—flustered.
I took a deep breath. She glanced over my shoulder, obviously noticing the open French doors. I stepped into the family room and closed the door behind me. She retreated, almost like she was afraid.
"I think we both know what has to happen," I started.
"I'm not sure what you mean."
"Please, I know how you feel about me. You think I'm not good for Jason and—"
"I don't—"
"I agree with you." That surprised her. "I think I've known it from the start, but your son—well, he's irresistible, and then after what happened, we kind of became the talk of the school. I think if I left him, he'd be laughed at, you know can't even keep the Emo girl. I can't do that to him."
She thought for a moment and then proceeded carefully. "Well, I guess it's good to know we both have Jason's best interests at heart, but I don't think you realize the power you have over him."
I turned away to hide my face. She didn't realize the power her son had over me.
"I suppose the issue then is what are we going to do about it?" she continued.
"Jason's pulling away—you've seen that. I think that's what tonight was all about. It will be baseball season in another week and he'll be busy. By the time the season's over he'll have forgotten all about me and I can go back to my family. Don't you see, it's the best way for everyone."
"Will you be able to find them?"
"I'm sure, if I try." I remembered the story Jason told her. "Actually, I can probably just go down to the police station and they'll make it all happen."
It was clear Jason's mom didn't know what to say. Sure, she probably doubted what I said would be so easy—she was right, but what was she going to do?
"You're a nice girl—I want you to know I don't dislike you—it's just, well, I'm not sure you're good for each other."
"Like a fatal attraction."
Her face went blank.
"It was a joke—like the movie title."
She forced a smile and then walked away stopping in the kitchen to turn off the lights before going upstairs.
