Over the Hedge: Part 2- The Finale (Lucky in Love)

by Minerva Vesta

  “I had such a wonderful time this weekend. It’s going to be difficult heading back home alone.” Ma’s voice sounded despondent, and I felt guilty for my earlier thoughts. She could spend an eternity telling every horrid childhood story about me. Even the one where I almost shit myself in the pool after eating some bad potato salad.

  “You ever think about moving? Sean mentioned how much you love your work as a health educator. But with no family there, do you think you could make this your home?” Mrs. Price asked.

  “I have been thinking about it. Truthfully, since Lashawnda has been a part of Sean’s life, I’ve been thinking about it even more,” she said confiding in the other woman. “But, I’m just not a hundred percent sure if I want to give up my job and my home. Besides, Sean doesn’t want his old momma moving here and harassing him.”

  Lashawnda carefully handed the serving tray to Crystal for drying. She told me once before there was a silent rule in their home; she wasn’t allowed to handle the fine china. She turned around and sat next to my mother.

  “I don’t think Sean would mind if you lived closer. Truthfully, he’s always worried about you being so far way. Yes, it’s only a three-hour drive, but the way he acts sometimes, it’s like you’re all the way on the other side of the world. He’s always saying stuff like, ‘I wonder what Ma’s having for dinner?’ or ‘Man I miss waking up to the smell of Ma’s fresh baked biscuits and gravy’.” Lashawnda deepened her voice to mimic me.

  “It sounds like all he wants me here for is for food,” Ma laughed. While that wasn’t completely true, I did miss her biscuits on a Saturday morning. But my woman was a fucking beast in the kitchen; so, I wasn’t deprived at all.

  “Ooh he is greedy. But seriously you should really think about it. I feel so close to you, and my parents are here. I’m sure you could find another position as a health educator with no problem,” Lashawnda said, “Please think about it. Besides, who am I going to turn to, to whip Sean into shape when he gets out of line?”

  “Honey, you got nothing to worry about. You got my baby boy so tightly wrapped around your little finger he wouldn’t know his head from his tail if you were to ever leave him,” Ma said.

  “Please, just think about it,” Lashawnda begged.

  “Okay okay…for you, I will seriously think about it,” Ma conceded.

  I decided to make my presence known. With Mr. Price and Brent coming up behind me, I didn’t want to seem like I was eavesdropping—even if I was.

  “Okay, what did you just agree to?” I asked my mother as I stepped into the kitchen. I caught Lashawnda’s gaze lowering in that teasing way, whenever she was happy to see me. I walked up to her and slid my arms around her waist.

  “None of your business, nosy.” Lashawnda returned my embrace, wrapping her arm around my shoulders.

  “Who are you calling nosy?” I asked as I nudged the side of her neck with the tip of my nose, causing her to giggle uncontrollably.

  “Oh, come on. Y’all need to cut all that out,” Brent said in a booming voice. Everyone in the room laughed as he feigned sickness.

  “Jealous?” I asked, pulling Lashawnda flush against me from behind.

  “Heck no! Just trying not to bring up all that good food I just ate,” Brent said, stretching and rubbing his well-toned abs. With the sheer mass of food he consumed, one would assume he would have a potbelly.

  “I’m with you on that one,” Crystal chimed in.

  “Oh, you want some too?” I asked her in a growl.

  I surprised Crystal by grabbing her into a bear hug and blowing raspberries on the side of her face. She squealed, laughing hysterically. I went in for double the punishment by attacking her ticklish sides with my fingers. Crystal was laughing so hard tears began streaming from her eyes.

  “Okay…okay…I give…uncle!” she screamed.

  “You sure?” I asked, giving her a menacing glare.

  “Yes…yes, I’m sure,” she urgently replied. I finally let her go but not before placing a loud, sloppy kiss on her cheek. Crystal was about to wipe it off when I gave her a look that screamed, ‘don’t you even think about it’. Instead, she smiled from ear to ear.

  “They never grow up do they?” asked Mrs. Price.

  “No, they don’t…but at least we don’t have to change their diapers,” Ma added with a shake of her head.

  Like two children, Crystal and I looked at each other and made silly monkey faces at the same time.

  “Sandra, I hope you don’t mind getting out of the house for a spell. Usually we walk down to the lake after Sunday dinner. It allows me to burn off some of that good food and an excuse to refuel with more dessert when we get back,” Mr. Price said.

  “Not at all; if it’s a family tradition then, I’m all in.” Ma slid from her chair and clapped her hands. It was so good to see her getting along with Lashawnda’s parents. I know Sandra Colcord, and she doesn’t put on airs for anyone. Which is why I sent up a prayer before we arrived, pleading to God she didn’t misbehave.

  “Me too, especially the ‘refueling’ part,” Brent chimed in.

  “Oh, you’re not coming back in my house. Matter of fact, I think you better grab your car keys so you can head home as soon as we hit the front lawn,” Mr. Price said, looking at him.

  “Phil, that’s not nice,” Mrs. Price said, swatting her husband’s arm.

  “Woman, I never said I was a nice man. Did you see how much food this boy ate? I mean, really look at how much food he shoveled down his throat? And, the crab cakes…Elizabeth, he ate all the damn crab cakes.” Mr. Price’s voice rose with incredulity.

  “No, Phil, I was too busy focusing on my own plate to worry about what Brent was eating.” Mrs. Price shook her head reproachfully at him, while we all laughed.

  “Well, see there is your problem. You’re not very observant,” he said. “I saw him place a whole biscuit in his mouth, take two bites, and it was gone. Two bites! How am I supposed to feel knowing this boy is coming back to my house to eat? I can’t feel safe when it comes to Brent and my food, Elizabeth,” Mr. Price said walking out, toward the yard.

  “I feel your pain, Mr. Price.” I said finally speaking up. I couldn’t hold in the laughter that erupted from my mouth.

  Everybody that knew Brent knew of his veracious appetite. He was lucky his family came from money because there is no way he could survive a life of poverty. When we lived together in college our monthly grocery bill was well over a thousand dollars a month. And that didn’t include all the eating out and ordering in that we did.

  “Well I’m sure Mrs. Price won’t let me go home without some leftovers.” Brent sidled up next to her and threw his arm around her shoulder.

  “Too close boy,” Mr. Price grumbled as he flipped Brent’s arm off and replaced it with his. “Let’s get out of here. I’d like Sandra to see the sunset over the lake.”

  While everyone hustled out the door, I held Lashawnda’s sweater as she slipped on her sandals. Her attempts to do both almost caused her to fall. When she was done, she grabbed the sweater and tied the lightweight material around her waist. She thanked me with a peck on the lips. We were the last ones out of the door, and I couldn’t help but take the opportunity to kiss her deeply while no one was watching.

  “How long does this monthly thing usually last?” I asked her, making the word, monthly sound dirty.

  “Usually four to five days,” Lashawnda answered.

  “Damn, that’s a long time.” I rubbed the back of my neck, feeling odd discussing something like this. This was just another example of my limited experiences with women. I never stuck around one long enough to worry about things like this.

  “I’m sorry, but I can’t turn it off and on like a faucet.” Lashawnda poked her lips out in a pout.

  “Oh, well…this is gonna be the longest four to five days of my life,” I admitted.

  After over a year of not having sex, now that we’d crossed that line, I was addicted. Hell, after one tas
te, I was hooked. There was no putting that cat back in the bag, now. Days without sliding between those thick thighs sounded like the worst torture known to man. Sleeping next to her was going to be even worse. It wasn’t uncommon to wake up with me slipping inside of her.

  Lashawnda slid one hand behind my back and the other rubbed my stomach underneath my shirt. I loved the feeling of her warm hands on my bare skin.

  “I don’t know. I think it might be for the best. Look at the bright side. It will give me the opportunity I need to perfect my singing.” She looked up at me with those big brown eyes and licked her lips seductively. “Gotta microphone I can borrow?” she asked.

  Shit!

  I almost died and gone to heaven in that moment. Was she suggesting what I think she’s suggesting? When the hand on my stomach dipped low into my pants, lightly tugging at my short pubic hairs, I groaned with need. The thought of her sucking me off was enough to send me into overdrive. Lashawnda claimed to be a novice, but the woman was a damn genius when it came to performing oral. Knowing I was the only man to have ever experienced what she could do had my chest poking out with bravado.

  Maybe this monthly thing isn’t a bad idea.

  “Eww…y’all nasty. I heard that,” Crystal screamed, interrupting my daydreaming.

  “See, that’s what you get for eavesdropping, Tiny Tot. Come here and get some more of my kisses.” Dropping a kiss on Lashawnda’s lips, I went after Crystal.

  “I’mma tell Momma y’all back here talking about giving head.” Crystal tried to use Brent as a shield, bobbing and weaving around him while we played chicken.

  “Your mom could probably give you some pointers,” Brent said with a cheeky grin.

  “Oh, Jesus. That’s nasty!”

  “That’s disgusting, Brent!”

  “Bro, seriously!”

  Crystal, Lashawnda, and I hollered out as Brent started laughing. There were times I should really consider leaving him at home. I was thankful the parents were up ahead of us and didn’t hear his dirty mouth. Sadly, around his own parents he was much worse.

  I turned back to Crystal, giving her my full attention. “Now, what was all that mess you were talking, Tiny Tot?”

  “Who you calling, ‘tiny’?” Crystal placed both hands on her hips while she fussed at me. “I’m not that short.”

  “What are you four feet tall?” I asked, playfully patting her on the head.

  “No, Green Giant…I’m five-four.”

  “She’s lying, Sean. She’s only five-two…and that’s on a good day,” Mr. Price yelled from up front.

  “Not fair, Daddy. I get it from your wife,” Crystal hollered back. Her words made Mr. Price pull his wife into a side hug while beaming down at her.

  “Well, you’re still a shrimp to me,” I said.

  Crystal did a couple maneuvers and tried hiding behind a neighbor’s car parked along the street. But I caught her as she slipped out by the bumper. I scooped her up over my shoulder into a fireman’s carry.

  “Lashawnda, save me!” she screamed, while flailing her arms and legs. The group laughed as I ran around with her, making airplane noises.

  “Geesh, you’re strong. I might be short but I’m no lightweight,” Crystal screamed between fits of laughter.

  I ran around Lashawnda and Brent as she slipped her hand between the crook of his arm. On my second pass around them, I bent and quickly pecked Lashawnda’s cheek, catching the tail end of whatever conversation they were having.

  “Thanks,” Brent said.

  “For what?” Lashawnda asked, giving him a perplexed look.

  Brent pulled her close. “For making my best friend happy…and for dinner.”

  I looked back and saw Brent and Lashawnda laughing together. It was nice knowing my woman and my best bro were getting along. I looked up at Crystal, who had stopped flailing around, and demanded I give her a piggyback ride and carry her all the way to the park. That’s when it occurred to me I was angry at Brian for another reason.

  “You okay?” I asked her.

  Crystal gripped my shoulders and looked down at my upturned face. “I should be asking you that. I’m not the one who’s hauling my big butt around.”

  I shook my head. “No, I mean from earlier…you know that whole thing with Brian.”

  “Yeah, I’m fine,” she finally answered.

  I didn’t believe her, but I didn’t want to push her too far. “Okay. But, if you need me to kick his ass across town, I’ll do it.”

  Crystal chuckled and ruffled my hair. “Umm…thanks; I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “I’m serious.” I paused. “I know we’ve only known each other for a short time, but I really do consider you my little sister. Although, I don’t have any actual siblings of my own, I know big brothers are supposed to protect their younger siblings. So, if you ever need me for anything, call me okay?”

  There was a long silence that hung between us until I heard a sniffle.

  “Crystal?” I asked when she didn’t respond.

  “Y-yeah…”

  “You crying?” I questioned, stopping at the entrance to the park.

  “Umm, no,” she answered with a shaky voice.

  I sighed heavily. I wanted to pull her around and give her a big hug. But, from what I had learned about Crystal, she wouldn’t want everyone asking her what was wrong. So, I kept on walking until I reached the swings.

  “It’s okay…go on ahead and let it out. Just remember what I said. I’m your big brother now, and I’ll always be here for you. Even if the earth was to be ravaged by fiery volcanoes; then suddenly, be covered in ice, causing your sister and I to be separated. I’ll still have your back—no matter what.”

  When we got to the swings, I stooped down, and she hopped off. Quickly wiping her face, she looked down at the grass and took a few deep breaths to regain her composure.

  “Sean?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Thanks…I really needed that.”

  “No problem, Tiny Tot.” I smiled at her when she made a mean face for her new nickname. “Need some help getting on the swing? You know them short legs of yours can only get you so far.”

  “Why I gotta be all that? How come you can’t give me a cool nickname, like Princess Awesomeness?” she asked, following my lead to lighten the mood. “I mean come on, Daddy calls me Crisis and now you with the short jokes. Lashawnda gets to be called Lucky. I mean come on Lucky?” she said disbelievingly.

  I laughed when she punched me playfully in the side.

  “Have you seen your sister lately? That girl needs all the good luck she can get. I swear the irony of her nickname is the only thing holding her in one piece.”

  “I heard that,” Lashawnda said walking up and taking a seat in the swing.

  “Sweetheart, I love you, but you are one clumsy woman,” I laughed as she pinched my arm.

  Brent walked up and started pushing Crystal on the swing.

  “Hey, let’s see who can jump off the farthest,” he suggested with excitement.

  “What!”

  “Are you crazy?” Crystal and I said at the same time. We looked at him as though he had lost his mind.

  “You trying to kill my woman?” I asked, slapping Brent on the back of the head.

  “What? I think it would be fun. We’ll even put some money on it,” Brent said unknowingly. He had spent some time with Lashawnda, but not enough to notice how she’s all thumbs. Even Lashawnda laughed at the thought.

  “Thanks, Brent, but I don’t think I’ll be taking part. As a kid, jumping off the swing was one of those things I never attempted.” she explained.

  “Ooh, remember when me, you, and Stacy tried jumping off the merry-go-round while it was spinning.” Crystal clapped her hands and hollered out.

  “Oh, please don’t remind me.” Lashawnda rolled her eyes.

  “Lashawnda thought she was the shit because she was so much taller than the rest of us. No matter how much we tried none of our jumps coul
d compete with hers.” Crystal bent over, still laughing as she got to the highlight of her story. “Then we had a sudden thunderstorm that got the whole playground soaking wet in under a minute. We started to leave but she wanted one final jump.”

  “Okay Crystal, shut it.” Lashawnda playfully tossed mulch at her sister. The tough square of dried wood bounced off Crystal’s leg.

  “She was all extra; stretching her arms like she was in the Olympics. And when she jumped, she must have forgotten that the metal was all wet. This girl slipped and got tangled up in the fast-moving merry-go-round. I mean arms and legs tied up like a pretzel. And to top it all off her clothes was dirty and ripped. Looked like she was in a war with a dump truck.”

  “Yeah some friends you and Stacy were. Had me limping home with busted shins while y’all skipped around me.” Lashawnda fussed and threw an even bigger chunk of mulch at Crystal.

  “Don’t get mad. See you learned your lesson though Lucky. And you had to explain to Momma why you thought it was a good idea to play in the rain,” Crystal replied. “Talking about you wanted to frolic in the Lord’s tears.”

  “Decades later and I still don’t find it funny.” Lashawnda rolled her eyes.

  “Bet you haven’t gotten on a merry-go-round since then?” Crystal asked, popping her hand on her hip.

  “Not a chance,” Lashawnda confessed.

  “Is it really that bad?” Brent asked her.

  I came around and sat on the empty swing. I pulled Lashawnda’s swing over to me, turning her around, and pulling her feet in my lap.

  “Bro, I’m telling you this woman is the biggest klutz in the world.” I smiled sweetly at her. “But I think it’s part of what makes her so special to me.” I pulled off Lashawnda’s slippers, looking at them strangely.

  “What?” she asked, noticing my expression.

  “When did you break these?” I ask, holding up the right foot. The strap of her slipper was broken. Since we started dating, I’d lost count on the number of ripped shirts and broken shoes.

  “Another one bites the dust!” Crystal and Lashawnda erupted into laughter.