My Nerdy Valentine

by Vicki Lewis Thompson

  As he was zipping his jeans, the phone rang. She wouldn't be able to hear it with the music playing so loud, and maybe that was just as well. He should answer it, anyway, and establish his presence here.

  Crossing to the phone wearing only a T-shirt, jeans, and socks, he picked up the receiver before the machine clicked on. "Hello?"

  Silence.

  The skin on the back of his neck prickled. "Hello?" He thought he heard someone breathing, but he couldn't be sure. "Listen, whoever the hell you are—"

  A soft click told him the caller was gone. Anger boiled in his chest, and he fought the urge to fling the phone across the room. No one had the right to harass another person like this. No one.

  The music stopped and Amanda came out of the bedroom dressed for work and holding her geek glasses in her hand. "Did I hear the phone?"

  He wanted to lie in the worst way. He seemed to be able to pull it off with someone like Gloria, but with Amanda, no such luck. "Hang-up."

  "You mean they hung up when they got the machine?"

  "They hung up when they got me."

  A slight shiver passed through her. Then she pressed her lips together and fooled with the earpieces on her glasses. "I guess that's good."

  He hated the fear that she was trying so valiantly not to show. "Especially if the valentines and song messages stop." He prayed it would be that easy.

  Harvey slammed his fist into the wall beside the stereo, because that seemed like the right thing to do under the circumstances. What was a guy doing in Amanda's cute little apartment? Harvey was the only guy who was supposed to be in there, not counting the old fart who visited her sometimes. This hadn't sounded like the old fart.

  His hand hurt like hell, though, and now his knuckles were bleeding. Not only that, there was a hole in the wall the size of a Big Mac. Louise would kill him when she came home from her nail appointment and saw that.

  Sucking his bleeding knuckles, he looked around for a way to disguise the damage. Then he spotted his and Louise's framed wedding invitation hanging over by the front door. Perfect.

  But the picture hanger holding it up wouldn't come out of the wall, so he had to get the hammer and pry it out. When he finally got it loose, a chunk of plaster came with it. Hell. Now he had two holes. The one by the stereo was bigger, so he hammered the picture holder above that one. In the process he hit his thumb.

  Just great. Now his knuckles were bleeding on one hand and his thumb was swelling on the other. He hoped it went down by Valentine's night, or he'd have trouble carrying Amanda out of her apartment.

  But a swollen thumb wouldn't keep him from following Amanda tonight to find out what was up with this guy answering her telephone. If she wanted to make Harvey really jealous, she was doing a fine job of it. Or maybe this was a pushy guy, and she needed someone to move in and rescue her.

  If he watched them, he'd figure out what was going on. He needed more information. But first he had to cover up the holes he'd made. The wedding invitation worked on hole number one, but now he needed something smaller to put over hole number two.

  Scouring the house, he found the little plaque in the master bathroom that said loving you completes me. Louise had bought that for him, and then he hadn't known what to do with it. She'd finally suggested hanging it in the bathroom over the toilet, which he took to mean that loving him made her regular.

  The plaque was exactly the right size to cover up the hole by the front door. But he wasn't moving the hook it was on and risking another hole. He'd learned his lesson about that. The plaque could hang on a pushpin.

  And on the hook could go ... the spare roll of TP! It even had a yellow crocheted cover, so it didn't look that bad hanging there. As an added bonus, it freed up the back of the tank for other stuff, like Louise's gun magazines.

  Harvey would have rather had some copies of Hustler in the bathroom, but Louise wouldn't let him keep those around. So if he took a break, he had to read her gun magazines, which he found mostly boring. Louise loved them, though.

  Some gun dealer had convinced her the sawed-off shotgun she'd bought was an antique once owned by Al Capone, himself. Harvey thought the gun dealer was a rip-off artist who figured out Louise had money to burn, but Louise was so stuck on that gun that there was no talking sense to her about it.

  Ten minutes later, Harvey was bundled up for his trip to Geekland, where Amanda worked at night. Harvey had been in there once since he'd started keeping track of Amanda. He'd worn a Cubs cap pulled down low, and he'd chosen a table far away from the bar. Tonight being Friday, he could take cover in the crowd with no problemo.

  If that stockbroker was in the bar tonight bothering Amanda, Harvey would do something about it. Amanda was his, and no geek was going to horn in on his territory. Halfway out the door, he turned and went back in. He needed to send another song to Amanda, and the nerd had distracted him from doing that. But he'd send a different tune than the one he'd planned on. This one would leave no doubt in her mind that he meant business.

  * * *

  Dealing with a stalker was the only thing keeping Amanda from jumping Will's bones. If not for that anonymous phone call, she and Will might be rolling in the sheets instead of riding a bus to Geekland. When she'd walked into her living room and found him in jeans and a T-shirt, all rational thought had disappeared.

  Some men wore padded jackets to broaden their shoulders, and she'd wondered if that could be Will's story. But the T-shirt didn't lie. Will had the wide shoulders and narrow hips of a running back.

  He wasn't all muscled up, though. He had the lean thing going on, but there wasn't an ounce of mean in the guy, which was all to the good in Amanda's opinion. Those glasses and soft green eyes only added to the hottie factor. She was getting X-rated bedroom ideas.

  Looking at Will standing there in all his nerd glory had inspired her to call in sick. But then he'd told her about the phone hang-up, and fear had sapped all the lust right out of her body. That was a good thing, but she wouldn't go so far as to say the valentine stalker was doing her a favor.

  Given a choice, she'd take her old life back in a heartbeat. With a dose of luck, she'd have that life again in a few days. In the meantime, she stood next to Will on the bus, both of them clutching the same pole and Will's arm wrapped protectively around her shoulders.

  The bus was packed with commuters going home or to the nearest bar so they could celebrate the end of the work week. As the bus lurched from one stop to another, Amanda was thrown against Will. She was aware of every point of contact.

  She glanced up to find him staring over her head, as if he were immune to the sparks created each time they bumped bodies. Then she noticed how the muscles in his jaw tightened each time they were jostled.

  "I have to study all weekend," she said.

  "Hm?" He leaned down toward her.

  Standing on tiptoe, she spoke directly into his ear. "I have to study all weekend."

  "Oh." He looked into her eyes. "I figured."

  She'd been spending too much time listening to Gloria, because she noticed that his pupils were larger than normal. Maybe whispering in his ear had been a bad move.

  Focus, Amanda. "I'm not sure what you're going to do with your time," she said. "Please don't think you have to babysit me all day. You probably have things you like to do on the weekends, maybe stuff with Justin, or—"

  "Don't worry about it."

  She tried to picture the two of them cooped up in the apartment all day. She'd be studying, and he'd be lounging around, maybe in his sexy T-shirt and jeans outfit. He might be reading, thumbing through a magazine ... with those big thumbs ...

  She shouldn't have loaned the vibrator to Mavis. She should have kept it and used it, just as Gloria had suggested. Then she wouldn't be a mass of hormonal frustration ready to explode.

  He smiled down at her. "You are worried about it, aren't you?"

  "It would be so boring for you."

  "No it wouldn't. I'm amazingly self-suffic
ient, and I brought reading material."

  Do you thumb through your reading material? "I'm sure you are self-sufficient, but—"

  "You're nervous about spending the day together."

  Damn straight. I'm even more nervous about the nights. "Not at all. We're two responsible adults." And two consenting adults. The bus lurched again, heaving them together. She enjoyed it entirely too much.

  Will steadied her before shifting his weight so they weren't plastered quite so tightly against each other. He'd gone back to staring over her head, and his jaw worked. "Maybe hanging out with you and reading is a little too passive."

  "You should have brought your free weights." It was a joke. She didn't picture him as owning free weights.

  "I should have."

  So, another surprise. The stockbroker nerd worked out with free weights. He was becoming sexier at every turn. Not good. "There's always housework."

  He laughed. "Then I could go for a jog. If things are too tense, then I can go for another jog. And so on, ad infinitum. Eventually I'll be so exhausted, you'll have no worries."

  She didn't think watching him getting hot and sweaty would be much help, but telling him that would only put a finer point on her case of lust. "We'll manage," she said.

  "Yeah, we will." He leaned down and glanced out the window. "We're almost there. Before we go in, you need to know I'm going to do everything I can to keep Gloria and Justin from hooking up. You might think there's no harm in it, but—"

  "Gloria would be easier on his liver."

  "But hard on his heart."

  "You think?"

  "You don't know Justin. He'll get attached, and from what I've seen, Gloria doesn't do attachments." As the bus slowed, Will relaxed his grip on her shoulder and slid his hand down to twine his fingers through hers.

  The move was so natural, as if they really were a couple. Amanda allowed herself a moment of regret. "You're right that Gloria doesn't do attachments, but if Justin wants her..."

  Will shook his head. "I can't let him do that to himself. He was there for me in a similar situation and kept me from doing something stupid."

  "A woman?" Amanda was intrigued.

  "A woman. I caught her—" He gave Amanda a quick glance. "Never mind."

  "Hey, come on."

  He gazed at her, his expression neutral. "I caught her with another guy."

  "Caught her where?"

  "In bed. Our bed."

  "Yikes."

  "At the time I was too stunned to do anything, but later I decided to fight him. Justin pointed out that he was a jock, which meant I'd be beaten to a pulp and Helen wasn't worth it."

  Amanda's heart ached for him. "I'm sure she wasn't worth it. That's a low move."

  "To be fair, I wasn't paying enough attention to her. She flat-out told me I mostly cared about my thesis and looking for a job."

  "But those goals are important."

  He shrugged. "So was she."

  The direction of the conversation made her uncomfortable. She wasn't going to ask Will if he regretted how his life had turned out. She didn't want to hear the answer.

  Air brakes sighed as the bus came to a stop. Will took her hand and helped her down the steps. "So anyway, where Gloria's concerned, I—"

  "Watch yourself," Amanda said. "There she is." A Checker Cab had pulled to the curb behind the bus and Gloria was climbing out, her fur coat billowing around her.

  She spotted them immediately. "Thank God you're here." She hurried over, her five-inch heels cracking the thin layer of ice on the sidewalk. "I need a geek guide to escort me in there. If anybody asks, I'm doing psychological research."

  "Listen, you don't have to do this," Will said quickly. "I'll be glad to tell Justin you changed your mind."

  "Not on your life." Gloria took Will's free arm and faced the entrance. "I'm going in."

  Amanda decided to support Will's efforts to derail Gloria. Maybe the nerd stereotype would do the trick. "You'll hate it. Lots of technical conversation, nasal laughter, mismatched clothes, and glasses held together with tape. Not your scene at all."

  "That may be true of the other men in there," Gloria said. "But it doesn't apply to either Will or Justin, who are nerdy in a sexy way. I've decided to widen my net and see which one I can coax in first. Or maybe I'll get them both." She glanced up at Will. "Ever considered a threesome?"

  TWENTY

  The evening proved to be the suckiest Will had ever slogged his way through. Everyone else seemed to be enjoying the festivities, but he was miserable. He was supposed to be the boyfriend, but he couldn't hang around Amanda that much and put her job at risk.

  That left him to pursue his other assignment—trying to identify her stalker in the crowd. As the night wore on, any guy who ordered a drink from Amanda became a suspect. Finally Will was ready to clear the bar of everyone with the ability to pee standing up.

  Meanwhile Gloria threw herself into trivia and was too damned good at it to suit Will. But he couldn't defend his title tonight, not when he needed to watch Amanda's back. Even more galling, Gloria's consumption of martinis had no noticeable effect on her mental ability, but they obviously eliminated her inhibitions, and Gloria didn't have many to start with.

  Each time she won a round, she hopped on the bar and did a victory dance, giving the guys below an eyeful. Of course they loved it, but Will had expected the women in the bar to resent Gloria and make life unpleasant for her. No such luck. Gloria had come with a purse full of fingertip vibrators, and in between trivia rounds she gave out sexual advice.

  Everyone was enthralled, and the most enthralled in the batch was the one person Will had hoped to protect. If Gloria asked Justin to go home with her, he'd jump at the chance. Short of locking Justin in the Geekland men's room, Will couldn't think of a way to stop the inevitable.

  He had only one ally. Several times Will had watched as Amanda drew Justin aside and talked earnestly with him. Judging from the way she kept glancing at Gloria during those conversations, she had to be filling Justin full of reasons to steer clear of the wild sex therapist.

  Will was grateful. He was also in serious lust. All night he'd been aware of her working behind the bar, her blond hair shimmering in the light, her funky Geekland glasses making her look like a cross between a prom queen and a spelling bee champ.

  From the evidence, he was becoming obsessed, and that wasn't the best mental state when he was heading into a one-on-one weekend with the lovely Ms. Rykowsky. Closing time drew near, and then true torture would begin.

  He stuck to virgin drinks all night. Staying sober was the only way to watch out for Amanda now and keep himself from jumping her later. Sobriety also gave him a fighting chance to block Gloria if she tried to whisk Justin away to her lair. He was expecting that move any time, now.

  As he was nursing his last virgin Chi-Town Lakefront Breeze of the night, Gloria approached, martini glass in hand. Her smile was seductive and her hips undulated with each step. Appropriately, the sound system was belting out Hall & Oates' "Maneater." Will would have to duct-tape Justin to a bar stool to keep him from falling for temptation this hot.

  She slid onto a stool beside Will. "Where've you been keeping yourself, cutie pie?"

  "I like to stay in the background."

  "You shouldn't hide your talents like that." She took a sip of her martini and left a lipstick print on the rim. "I have a proposition for you."

  Now there was a shocker. "Gloria, it wouldn't work, especially not now, when I'm committed to helping Amanda get rid of her stalker guy."

  "I have a solution for everything." She held up a finger with a perfectly manicured nail. "Number one, you have scruples about dating a client, but it's the weekend. You're not at work and neither am I."

  "That's splitting hairs, but it's irrelevant because of this deal with Amanda." And thank God for that, even if it promised to be the biggest challenge of his life. At least it kept him at a safe distance from Gloria.

  Apparently
unfazed by his argument, she held up a second finger. "Number two, I agree that someone needs to pose as Amanda's boyfriend, but it doesn't have to be you."

  "What?" He had the feeling he was losing control of the discussion.

  "All she needs is a place holder, and how silly to waste your talents in that kind of generic position. Let Justin do it. I've already discussed it with him, and he—"

  "Hold it." Panic took Will by the throat. He was worried about his sexual restraint if he spent the weekend with Amanda, but at least he had some sexual restraint. Currently Justin was one big throbbing impulse.

  Justin couldn't be trusted to stay alone with a woman who looked like Amanda. Come to think of it, Justin couldn't be trusted to stay alone with any woman, not even a complete dog. Any person who marked an F in the gender column on a driver's license application was off-limits to Justin for the foreseeable future.

  "Wait here," Gloria said. "I'll go get him. He'll convince you that I have the perfect plan."

  "No. I'm not—" But Will was talking to an empty stool. For someone who had consumed enough martinis to put a major dent in the bar's gin supply, Gloria possessed surprising speed. He turned on the stool, looking for Amanda. He needed backup, and he needed it now.

  She caught his glance. Bar rag in one hand, she came toward him. "What's up?"

  "Gloria."

  "Don't worry. I worked on Justin all night. I think I've convinced him to take a pass on what Gloria's offering."

  He noticed that her nose was adorably shiny. She'd been working hard tonight, and her makeup was fading. He wanted to kiss the tip of that shiny nose and then move on down to her mouth, which had lost all traces of lipstick. She'd be great to wake up to.

  "I appreciate what you've been trying to do," he said. "But Gloria is nothing if not resourceful. Her new plan involves—"

  "Here's Justin!"

  Will turned on the revolving stool as Gloria appeared, one hand on Justin's shoulder as she propelled him forward. Justin looked mildly potted.

  "Boyfriends 'R' Us," Gloria said. "He's ready for his assignment, aren't you, Justin?"