by Beth Burnett
“I know now! But I first thought it was a bug.”
“Of course. But you have now determined that it is, indeed, a leaf or a piece of string.”
“Yes.”
“And you still won’t pick it up.”
“That’s correct.”
Danny laughs. “That might be worse than the whole foot thing.”
“It’s a little weird, I know.”
“It is a little weird.”
Bradley is trying to catch my eye from behind the bar. I look up and realize that we are the only ones left in the place. “Danny, we should probably go.”
The waitress brings our check and Danny insists on paying. I glance at the bill to make sure he leaves a good tip, which he does. Another point to the good side.
Walking to my car, Danny takes my hand gently. He can’t be more than 5’10 and in my heels, we are the same height. I turn my head to look at him as we walk. In profile, he is even more beautiful. His nose is perfectly straight and his jaw curves around sharply. I want to touch his face.
“Do you have a long drive?” he asks.
“I live in Westlake, just across from Bay. How about you?”
“I live on 117th in Cleveland. Just on the other side of the city line from here.”
“That explains why you were able to come to Polly’s every day to stalk me,” I say, laughing.
He turns to me as we reach my car. “I don’t want to play any stupid games. I like you a lot, and I want to spend more time with you. I want to go out with you again. I’m asking for permission to call you.”
“Yes. Yes, I want to see you again, too. Do you want my number?”
“I have your cell. Caller ID. You should give me your home number, too.”
“I should?”
He nods. “What if there is a cell phone emergency? What if you drop your cell phone in a mud puddle? What if the tower gets struck by lightning? I’ll need to call the plain old-fashioned land line.”
I give up and give him my home number. “But don’t call it unless you can’t get me on my cell for some reason. My current roommates cannot be trusted to take messages.”
I smile up at him, while leaning back slightly on my car. If he can’t pick up that I want him to kiss me from this, he doesn’t deserve a kiss.
Oh, he’s picked it up. He takes my face gently in his hands. His lips are soft against mine. He gently closes his lips over mine, lightly at first, then a little harder. I open my mouth just enough to invite his tongue and he obliges by sliding just the tip of it around the inside of my lips. His hands twine into the hair at the back of my neck and he pulls me a little harder against him. I let out a small sigh and he steps back.
“I’m sorry,” he says.
Sorry. Sorry about what. He is about the best kisser I have ever experienced in my life. For the first time ever, I’m wishing for long hair and I make a vow to start growing it. Danny is searching my eyes. “I don’t want to rush anything. I really like you. I better go.”
Part of me thinks he is telling me what I want to hear, or what he thinks I want to hear, so he can get a second date. But his face is so worried and his voice is so sincere, I can’t help but believe him. I lean over, kiss him lightly on that strong jaw and turn towards my car. “I’ve had a wonderful time. Thank you.”
He opens my car door and puts out a hand to help me into the driver’s seat.”Thank you. Davey, seriously, this has been the best evening I’ve had in years.”
“You need to get out more,” I quip as I start my car.
Driving back to my place, I keep playing our date over and over in my head. His hands, his smile, his laugh. I root around in my purse for my cell phone.
“Davey-baby,” Andy answers.
“I just had the world’s best date! What are you doing?”
“I’m at Dick’s with a bunch of boys. Want to come for a drink?”
I think about it for a second.
“No, I better get home. I just wanted to tell you about my date.”
“Come over for breakfast tomorrow and tell me all about it,” she says.
“Breakfast?” I’m surprised. “Are you cooking?”
“No, you are. What are we having?”
“I have to work tomorrow, how about Sunday brunch at our place. I’ll get my mom to cook.”
“Great idea. I haven’t seen Leah since our lunch date.”
“Yeah, how was that?”
“She’s worried about me. She’s worried about you. Typical mom stuff.”
“Let me guess, she thinks you need to settle down and stop breaking hearts.”
Andy laughs. “Bingo.”
“And she wants me to get a different job because she’s afraid some pro-lifer is going to bomb the facility.”
“Right again!”
“I don’t know what I have to do to get her to understand that there is a big difference between working for a support center and working for a sexual health clinic.”
“You both give out free condoms.”
“Very comedic. Night Andy.”
“’Night baby girl.”
Chapter Six
I feel fantastic today. My mother is up and making coffee already. Lynne is still sleeping on the couch. Harry is nowhere to be seen. I can only hope he has run away from home. I’m an animal lover, I don’t wish him any harm. I just want him to live somewhere else.
“Morning, Leah,” I sing, kissing my mother on the cheek. “Didn’t even hear you come in last night.”
“Oh, Darling, the class was phenomenal! Sheila is brilliant.”
“Sheila?”
“Dr. Ward. She was thrilling. She taught us all about how to empower ourselves as women to make sure that we get what we want in bed and out of it.”
“That sounds fascinating,” I say, trying to keep the sarcasm out of my voice.
“It was fascinating,” Leah insists. “So much so that Lynne and I asked Sheila to go out for dinner with us after class. Our treat!”
“Wow, that’s amazing.” I grab a cup of coffee and toss in some non-dairy creamer.
“Next time, you have to go with us. She’s going to talk about multiple orgasms.”
“I am not going to a class to learn about multiple orgasms!”
“Well, do you have them, sweetie?” Leah looks concerned.
“Mother!” I’m completely mortified. “I don’t want to talk about my sex life.”
“Speaking of which, how was your date?”
“He’s an angel. Sincere, gentle, warm, funny. Charming. Extremely cute.”
Leah snorts. “Men are not sincere. And if he is gentle and warm on the first date, it’s because he wants to get laid.”
“I don’t think he just wants to get laid. He wasn’t at all pushy.”
“Men are good at hiding it in the beginning. Look at Joe.”
“I have to go to work. I’m not having this conversation.”
I pour my coffee into a to-go cup and make my exit.
“Darling,” Leah calls after me. “Don’t fuck him until we’ve all met him!”
Steve is sitting on my desk when I get into work. “Well?”
“Well what?”
“Oh please, how was your date?”
Erik looks up from his desk. “Spill the beans. How was it?”
I smile slightly.
“Oh, God. It’s the I’m freshly laid face!” Steve screams.
“No, no. We didn’t have sex. We just had a wonderful evening.”
Erik shakes his head. “If you were both men, you would have had sex before the second course.”
Steve laughs. “It’s true. Erik gave me a blow job in the car on the way to our first date.”
I cover my face with my hands. “I can’t believe you just told me that!”
Erik shakes his head. “I can’t believe we didn’t tell you that before.”
Steve heads to the coffee machine. “Seriously, though. Did he kiss you good night?”
I flop down into my chair an
d put my feet on my desk. “Yes, as a matter of fact. He did.”
“Ooh, kiss and tell,” Erik says.
“He was perhaps the best kisser of all time.”
“Whoa.” Steve sits back down at his desk.
The three of us gossip about my date until Ron comes into the office.
“Davey, how was your date?”
“Should we send out a memo? Do you think the accounting department wants to hear about this? Shall I call the janitor?”
Ron laughs. “Don’t be so touchy. We love you. Besides, you’re a lot bitchier when you’re celibate.”
“Ah, the truth comes out.”
Steve puts his hand on his heart. “I’ll take celibate Davey over “brokenhearted by that asshole Joe” Davey!”
“Stop,” I warn.
“So how was it?” Ron is nothing if not persistent.
“Honestly, it was fantastic!”
“Excellent. Do you have the replies on the last mass mailing we sent out?”
“Sir, yes sir,” I salute. I reach into my file cabinet and hand him the papers in question.
“Excellent.” He pauses in the doorway. “Jonah Aster’s mother is giving a speech at the benefit next month. I heard her speak to a small group last night. She’s powerful.”
Steve nods. “I’m glad she agreed to do it.”
I am, too. We can talk all we want about the need for compassion and acceptance, but it means so much more coming from someone who has seen the devastation caused by a lack of it. My heart goes out to Jonah’s mom.
Ron heads to the door. “I hope she makes a hell of an impression on our donors.”
We all concur and Ron leaves the room. I settle into my work day, thinking alternately about a sweet faced dead teenage boy and a sweet faced, very much alive thirty-five year old man.
I’m about ready to head out to lunch when Andy calls my cell.
“Davey baby, how’s it going?”
“It’s a good day, oh studly one. How about you?”
Andy sighs. “I must be getting old. I just canceled my date for tonight. I just don’t have it in me to be charming and sexy. Want to come over after work?”
“Sounds great. We can order a pizza and watch a movie.”
“My turn to pick the movie, though, I’m sick of that emotional PMS crap you make me watch.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I say, laughing. My phone beeps. Danny is calling on the other line.
“Andy, gotta go. See you this evening.”
“Bye, Davey baby.” I hit the talk button.
“Hey.” His voice instantly sends little shivers down my spine.
“Hey.”
He clears his throat. “I wanted to make sure that I hadn’t imagined what a great connection we had with each other last night.”
“No, you didn’t imagine it,” I say, softly. I look up. Steve and Erik are both leaning half off of their own chairs, listening to my conversation. I flip them off and turn towards the wall.
“I was hoping I could see you again. Soon. Like tonight.”
“I have plans tonight with Andy,” I answer. “What about tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow sounds great. Morning, afternoon, or evening?”
“How about afternoon? I have brunch with the girls in the morning.”
He laughs. “You’re extremely popular.”
“Only with family. They have to be nice to me.”
“Well, can I pick you up at two?”
“Pick me up? At my place?” My stomach drops.
“Why not?”
“Um, my mother and Lynne might be there.” I can’t even imagine the scene.
“I’d love to meet them,” he answers. “I need faces to go with the stories.”
“Danny, you can’t meet my mother, we haven’t even had a second date.”
“It will be our second date. It’s fine. Are you ashamed of me?”
“Not you!”
Danny laughs again. “Give me your address. I’ll see you at two tomorrow.”
I have barely put down the phone when it rings again.
“Davey, darling!”
“Leah, what’s going on?”
“I just wanted to see what time you’re coming home for dinner. I want to make moussaka.”
“I’m not. I’m going to Andy’s after work.”
“And Lynne has a date tonight, so I guess I’ll skip the moussaka.”
“Lynne has a date?” I’m dumbfounded. “With whom?”
“I have no idea. I figure she will tell us when she’s ready.”
“I guess. I better go. Hey, I invited Andy for Sunday brunch.”
“Sounds good. I’ll make something spectacular. Love you darling.”
“Love you, too.”
The rest of the work day goes by in a blur and I am walking on air by the time I get to Andy’s house. I walk in and head straight for the kitchen for a beer. “Hey,” I yell as I’m walking through.
“Hey, I’ll be out in a minute,” Andy yells back.
“Beer?”
“Yep.”
I grab a couple of beers and walk through to the bedroom. Andy is walking out of the master bathroom, toweling off her shaved head. She’s completely naked and, as usual, I can’t get over the perfection of her body. I sigh. “Andy, I really want your body.”
She laughs. “Too bad you don’t mean that the way it sounds.”
“Funny.” I hand her a beer and sit on the bed and watch as she goes to the closet.
“Hmm,” I say. “What should I wear today? Jeans and a muscle shirt or sweats and a muscle shirt?”
“Very funny,” she says, whipping a t-shirt at my face.
“Ah, a ten year old blue muscle shirt. Vintage. Very good choice.” I toss it back to her and she slips it on.
Andy lies down on the bed. I fall back next to her. She turns to face me. “So tell me about Mr. Wonderful,” she says.
“Oh, Andy. He’s amazing. We talked and laughed and he is just so sweet, and so gentle.”
“Meh,” she says. “Gentle is for weenies.”
“Stop it. He really was. He held my chair for me, and opened the car door.”
“A gentleman! Thank God. Did he kiss you goodnight?”
“Yes, he…” I stop at a knock on the door.
“I’ll go see who it is while you put on some pants,” I say, getting out of bed.
I open the door to a woman I don’t know. “Hi.”
She stalks past me, clipping my shoulder with hers. “Where’s Andy?” she demands angrily.
Andy comes out of the bedroom, buttoning her jeans. “Hey, Heather? What’s up?”
“What’s up? You canceled our date to hang out with a friend and I come here to find you with this bitch!”
“First of all, why are you showing up at my house when I canceled our date?” Andy puts her hand on the wall next to Heather’s face. “Second of all, this is my best friend. My straight best friend, in case it is any of your business. And you will not ever refer to her as a bitch. Understood?”
Heather glares at me, then looks back as Andy. “Yeah, right, straight best friend.”
“Andy, I should leave you alone to deal with this,” I say, walking towards the door.
“Screw that!” Andy is pissed now. “Heather is leaving.”
“Fuck you, Andy!” Heather screams. “We had plans.”
“And now we don’t.” Andy takes the girl’s arm and starts herding her towards the door.
“Wait, wait, wait.” I raise my hands. “Look, I really am Andy’s friend. I really am straight. I really did just come here to talk about the amazing man I just met. I’m not a threat.”
Heather relaxes a little. Andy lets go of her arm and leans back against the wall. “I’ll call you tomorrow,” she says.
The girl shakes her head. “No, don’t. You can’t fuck with people and expect them to come running back to you, Andy. You’re hot now, but someday you are going to be old and alone and bitter and your so
-called straight best friend is going to be married and out of your life. See how many women come running then.”
She turns around and stalks out the door. Andy looks at me and shrugs. “So how about we order a pizza?” She grins.
I search her face, trying to see if she is bothered by what Heather said. I worry about her, too, but I know that no matter what happens, whether I get married or she does, we will never abandon each other. “Andy, are you all right?”
“Whatever,” she says, picking up the phone. You want veggie supreme or mushroom?”
Chapter Seven
Sunday is my favorite day of the week. Since I’m off on Sundays and Mondays, it’s the first day of my weekend. I can sleep in, have a leisurely brunch and the day is still wide open. This morning, we are sitting around the table, eating my mother’s famous crepes. Andy stopped by the farmer’s market on her way in and bought a bunch of fresh fruit. And Lynne and Leah had apparently gone on a cleaning frenzy last night, because there is not only room for all four of us at the table, but there are actually clean spots on the counter.
Andy uses her crepe to sop up some maple syrup. “Leah, if I wasn’t already in love with your daughter, I would marry you just for these crepes.”
“Very funny.” I stick my tongue out at her.
“It took me a long time to perfect them,” Leah says. “Especially after Davey told me I couldn’t use eggs.”
“Eggs are animals, too.”
“Not technically,” Lynne says.
“Well, I guess they are.” Andy looks thoughtful. “They’re kind of like chicken miscarriages, aren’t they?”
“Andy, that’s fucking disgusting!” Lynne throws down her fork.
“Well, anyway,” I say, popping a grape into my mouth, “they’re more like chicken menstrual cycles.”
“I think I just threw up in my mouth,” Lynne says.
Leah nods. “I agree. It’s an unfertilized egg. So technically it isn’t like eating an animal. It would be more like eating one of your unfertilized eggs.”
Andy chuckles. “I wouldn’t want to eat one of my ovum.” She grins at the look on Lynne’s face. “Oh come, on. You eat animals. What the animals go through to get to your plate is way more disgusting than this conversation.”
“It’s a matter of the natural cycle of life, Andy. We are higher on the food chain than animals. We eat them to live.”
