She packed her case and moved through to the kitchen finding Zach sitting on a stool and sipping coffee, his look distant as if he was in another world entirely.
“I'm ready.” Alex's words breaking into Zach's mind – he jerked upright and smiled.
“Okay, we'll wait for a bit and then Move – no point in taking the jet when we don't need to.”
Alex agreed as the jet might be needed for work. “Do you think Dmitri will be fine while we're away?” She was worried about leaving him with such a heavy workload and felt a little guilty.
“I'm sure he'll be fine, especially now Conall is going to help out.” Zach said, tho thinking on Conall then made him think of Lexi. Rather, Lexi and Michael. He hadn't made up his mind about that situation.
“It's not as if we can change it, they seem to be in love and I don't think anything will make a difference to that.” Alex replied to Zach's thoughts on their daughter. She might not have particularly liked Michael in the past but it was obvious the two were deeply in love.
“I know, it's just a bit weird, shit, he was a bloody Angel and now he's not – maybe he won't like that and if not it could cause them some problems.” Zach was over analysing the situation, he knew he was, but couldn't seem to stop himself.
“Zach I'd like to get going, can't we leave now?” Alex wanting to get to Scotland – she wanted to run – just run, wild, through the open countryside.
“Yea, come on.” Zach got up, washed out his coffee cup and moved through to the bedroom, getting both of the suitcases. Alex put on a nice warm rain jacket knowing she would need it where they were going. Zach pulled on his long leather coat.
As Zach was getting his coat on Alex was watching, the sight of him exciting her, she always loved him in that coat. Long, black, soft leather, he looked handsome and deadly at the same time.
Usually she would have voiced her lusty thoughts but just now she stayed quiet and pushed the thoughts away. Would she ever be back to her usual self?
When they Moved they did so to appear at the front entrance, knocking on the door before going in. Meal time was in full swing and the kitchen was busy – Margaret running around – as usual.
Scott, Bri and little Shona were there but there were also several others, William being one but some Alex didn't know at all. She stood quietly at the kitchen door not wanting to meet any strangers.
Margaret must've had a sixth sense because she came towards them and ushered them to the stairs, “Your room is all ready – this lot should be gone in an hour or so – if you want to freshen up or rest?”
Alex was grateful, she so didn't want to go into that room with people she didn't know. She wasn't usually this shy but she was just not herself at all.
Zach nodded, “Thanks Margaret – we'll drop the cases in the room and maybe go for a walk.”
Alex realised that's just what she wanted, though not a walk – a run. “I'll wait here.” she said and Zach bounded up the stairs and was soon back minus the cases.
“Righ, come on little one, where do you want to go?” Zach asked as they left the house. Taking a sharp right they rounded the side of the main farmhouse and behind was fields – for miles and miles – fields, hills, trees, just what Alex wanted.
“I want to run.” Alex said and Zach raised his eyebrows, Alexina hated running.
He didn't have any time to think about it though as Alex took off, using her Vampire speed, and Zach had to move fast to keep up. He ran just behind her, letting her decide on speed and direction.
Alex ran for miles...and miles...and as she ran she got angrier and angrier. The faster she went, the further she went, the angrier she got. Her anger was like a living thing inside her, growing and growing and it felt all encompassing as she ran even faster and harder.
A hill was in front, quite a large and steep one, and she threw herself at it...taking great leaps and bounds to get to the top. Once there she stopped dead, threw her head back and roared...long, loud, and her anger exited her body in those sounds, she carried on until her throat was sore and she felt the anger leaving her.
Zach stood behind his mate frowning – was she okay? Shit this was so not like Alexina.
Alex roared and screamed – the sounds going for miles, birds in trees near them took off in flight at the noise. Zach moved up closer, behind Alex as she screamed ,soon his front touched her back and when she didn't pull away he moved his arms around her. Holding her to him.
She screamed for many minutes but finally her screams got smaller, her roars not as loud, and finally she stopped. Sobbing, she fell back into Zach's arms and stayed there, crying for a long time.
Zach didn't move, stayed still, cuddling Alexina as she sobbed. Each one like a painful blow to him...he could very clearly feel her pain, anguish, fear and disgust.
“I'm so sorry my little one, I'm sorry I didn't get there in time.” Zach whispered and Alex twitched in his arms as if only now realising Zach was there, with his arms around her.
Alex moved round slowly, her face, she knew, would be all red and blotchy and not a pretty sight. She hiccuped several times before she got any words out, “Zach, I know that – please believe me when I say I don't blame you, not even a little bit. I love you. I'm just having a hard time sorting all this out in my head.”
Zach nodded, “I know Alexina, I know. I just wish I could help, though my trying to help has probably made it all so much worse and I'm sorry about that too.”
Alex leaned her head against Zach's hard stomach, “I know you all did what you did to help, and I can't say I wouldn't have done the same for someone I love, but it does hurt Zach. Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.” he replied.
“Never, ever, any more lies even ones by omission?” she asked, his answer was so important, if it was anything but the answer she wanted they were in trouble.
“Alexina I won't lie to you again...even if you ask...'Does my bum look big in this'!” Zach spoke earnestly, even though his words were half joking.
Alex punched him, “Oh that, my mate, is the one and only time you can lie!”
“Zach...my mind, my body is in just so much confusion. I feel as if I'm being torn apart inside. I love you, I still have 'those' feelings but then I remember what Andre did and it makes me feel dirty, disgusted and it pushes 'those' feelings away! I don't know what to do.” Alex started to cry again but not the great racking sobs of earlier.
“I can't say I know what you must be feeling but I can say it wasn't your fault, you shouldn't feel dirty, you're still perfect to me Alexina – you always will be. I miss you, my mate.” Zach hoped that his words could possibly help, though he had no idea, shit, maybe he was making things worse.
“We'll need to take things slow Zach.” Alex spoke quietly and Zach gave her a squeeze.
“I'll go as slow as you want Alexina, but we both need to feed honey – that's just a fact.”
Alex thought to their feeding, the fact that their bites elicited deep desire and orgasms, “I know, but the actual sex, that's what I'm scared about. I need that to be slow – gentle. I know that since I've became Vampire our sex life has grown – more…...”
Zach interrupted, “Adventurous?”
Alex laughed, “Yea you could say that, but right now, I can't be that woman. I can't do those things. I'm sorry.”
“Never apologise Alexina, never. I'll be soft honey, tonight, soft, gentle and slow, okay?” Zach waited on her answer...please say yes, please say yes, please say yes...his thoughts were running on a loop in his brain.
“Yes.” she replied with a smile having heard his thoughts loud and clear.
“So, you got any idea where the hell we are?” Zach chuckled, they had ran for miles and miles and he had no idea of where they were.
“Uhm nope, I just kept going with the anger building inside, it was very weird. Then here...it had to get out...shit if anyone heard they'll have called the police, thinking someone was getting murdered!” and Alex sta
rted to look around, no roads were in sight, thank goodness. No roads meant no Police.
Zach took her hand in his and turning he started walking back, hoping they could find their way.
They took it slow on the return journey and at one point saw a farmer's cottage, a copse of trees close by. Something caught Zach's eye, “Look.” he said and pointed.
Alex followed his finger, seeing a Jaguar running along the side of the trees. The large, lithe, beautiful, animal looked as if it was stalking something. Then their scent must've reached it, the Jaguar stopped dead and moved it's head all around – finally coming to bear on them. After a long look it darted into the trees, gone from sight.
“Jeez they are so gorgeous!” Alex was grateful to have even caught a glimpse of it.
“Yea, but very secretive. I hope all the jaguars we rescued are well and settled in okay.” Zach said as his thoughts went to the young jaguars they had found.
Alex nodded, - “Yea, me too.”
They continued walking slowly the entire way back, found that it had been just about a straight line they had taken on the run out. It was now dark but the main farmhouse still had a few lights on. They entered quietly, little Xander would probably be in bed.
The only person up was Margaret, tidying up in the kitchen. She smiled as they entered, looking closely at Alex, she noted that Alex didn't look quite so haunted.
“Everyone's in bed, they're doing a hunt tomorrow, so early nights all round.” Margaret told them and Alex was quite pleased nobody was about.
“Do you want anything to eat?” Margaret asked, ever the good hostess.
“Uhm no, but I wouldn't mind a glass of wine?” Alex said softly, she didn't want to make any noise in case she woke the little one.
“Oh no need to whisper Alex, Xander would sleep thought a hurricane, just like his dad!” Margaret laughed as she went to the fridge pulling out a bottle of Alex's favourite wine.
After pouring a large glass for Alex and one for herself she pointed, “Whisky's there Zach.”
Zach moved and saw the bottle of a good single malt on the sideboard, glasses in a circle next to it. Zach poured himself a good measure then sat down at the table, next to Alexina.
Alex took a sip of her wine, enjoying the taste and coolness, and continued on taking small sips in the quiet kitchen, then realised the glass was empty. Margaret refilled it – still without speaking, she thought if Alex wanted to talk she would.
After the second glass Alex felt a little more relaxed and Margaret saw it, “I'm away up, see you in the morning you two.” and Margaret left leaving the couple to themselves.
“How're you feeling?” Zach asked.
Alex looked round at him, “Bit better, I think, we'll see...later.”
Zach knew what she was meaning, she meant when they went to bed, he was going to treat her very, very gently tonight.
After a third glass Alex stood up, “Come on Zach – I think it's time we went to bed.” and she held out her hand, he took it in his and followed her out the room. Once in their bedroom Alex tensed up again, Zach could feel it rolling off her in great waves.
“I won't ever hurt you Alexina, please trust me, my mate?” He held his breath waiting on her to answer.
Alex took a deep breath, “I know Zach, I'm just scared – I'm scared he's changed me...who I am...and it makes me angry that I've given him that power!”
Zach pulled her into his arms, “You will always be my mate Alex, no matter what,just remember that...I love you.” and his hands started to stroke her back, gently, then he moved them both to the bed.
Zach lay Alex down in the middle of the bed then started to undress her slowly. All the while talking, telling her he loved her, she was beautiful, gorgeous, his soul mate. His words seemed to work and she relaxed – he carried on and then she was naked.
Zach stared at his mate, her body calling to him, he had missed her, missed their lovemaking. Even if they had managed it once or twice since her memories came back it had been mostly out of necessity of feeding. He knew that he had to take this very slowly, carefully, not scare her.
Zach undressed and lay down next to Alexina, taking her in his arms and slowly pressed his lips to her. A gentle kiss and then slowly probed with his tongue. She opened and took it in, a sigh escaping as she did so.
Zach treated his mate like a scared, virgin bride, like a piece of fine china, and she slowly responded. Zach could feel her fear, he even got some glimpses of flashbacks from her mind. He tried not to hiss in anger and slowly, very slowly, brought her to orgasm with his lips on hers and his hand on her sensitive area.
He didn't even place a finger inside, he was terrified of spooking her, he couldn't bear it if she pulled away from him again. As her climax ran through her body he continued to kiss her as she gasped into his mouth. Then one of her hands moved to the back of his head – pulling him to her – and he went willingly.
Alex was scared...terrified actually...pictures floated through her mind, ones where she was being beaten and raped. Zach's continued kissing and slow, sensual, massage of her nub pushed those thoughts and pictures from her mind. She relaxed into him as she finally came and he continued to kiss her. One of her hands moved to pull him closer and she knew she couldn't live without this...without her mate and their lovemaking.
She was still scared, still upset, still worried, but not quite so much. Zach continued, slowly, and slowly she began to respond. Alex placed a leg up and over Zach's thighs and she felt him tense, then relax, Alex realised Zach was just as scared as she. Only the reasons different.
“We can stop now if you want.” Zach whispered against her lips and she thought on his words before answering. Thought hard, and knew she didn't want to stop. This was Zach, her mate, her husband, her love – no, she didn't want to stop.
“It's fine, I want to go on, take it nice and slow, okay?” Alex murmured and Zach moved her onto her back, moving on top, and using his thighs to spread her legs wider. He placed his elbows either side of her and looked down into her eyes, there was a definite shine there. Thank god!
“Are you sure?” he asked again and she bit her bottom lip and nodded her head. Zach stayed in place, watching her face for any sign of alarm as he slowly positioned himself and entered her, a long moan escaping from his throat as he did so.
Zach moved with care and gentleness and they both slowly rose towards their release. “I think we should feed now.” Alex said the words and the effect was immense on Zach – he was very near and tried to hold on.
Both moved at once, bringing their necks into position at the same time as letting their fangs descend. Zach pierced Alex's throat a second before she did so on his and they started to feed.
The blood running down their throats was euphoric and then the desire that a Vampire bite brought hit them both – hard. Alex started to actually move, her first sign of full participation and Zach met her, albeit far more gently than usual. Their desire peaked and both fell over at the same time, Alex moaning into Zach's neck and vice versa. Both sets of fangs still embedded in the other's throat.
As the orgasms faded they moved apart slightly to release their fangs and Zach looked down at his mate. A look of bliss covered her features and he hoped they were on the road back.
Alex smiled up at him, her mind still in turmoil, but not nearly as bad as it had been. The gentleness that Zach had shown her brought a lump to her throat, his love for her great, shown in each and every touch, kiss, endearment.
“I love you Zach.” she said, trying to let him know just how much.
He smiled back, “I love you too my mate. Now I think we should do one of two things,” and he raised an eyebrow at her.
Alex frowned, “What?” she asked and Zach smiled.
“Well we can either cuddle and go to sleep or we can have a shower?”
Alex gasped – then smiled - “Oh I think a shower's a good idea.”
Zach laughed, moved from the bed, picked her up and
carried her through to the ensuite. They were in there for a very long time.
The next week went by quickly, Alex and Zach would go running or walking through the day and usually have an evening meal with Duncan, Margaret and whomever else was stopping by.
Then they went to bed and Zach showed her each and every second how much he loved her, how much he cared, doing so gently and with tenderness. By the end of the week Alex felt like a new person, what had happened was still there – but farther back. Not smack bang up front making her scared, no, Zach had pushed it back and shown her he would look after her, always.
“I think we should go home.” Alex was sprawled on the bed watching Zach get dressed and she felt relieved to feel arousal at the sight. She knew her eyes would be shining and as Zach turned to look at her he saw it too.
A smile crept onto his face, “Home? Now? What about later?” His tone was low and had that huskiness he got when he was turned on. His eyes started to shine and Alex laughed, “Well later's good, yes later's very good!”
Zach took off the boots, socks and jeans he had just put on – fast – and leapt onto the bed, pulling Alex on top of him. “I've missed you my mate.” he groaned.
Alex bent down and kissed him, pulling back she smiled, “I know, and I've missed you, I'm not sure we can use 'that' position for a while yet though.”
Zach understood, if that's what it took then so be it, missing out on one position to safeguard his mate from hurt – no problem. None at all.
Their lips met and he felt a great sense of relief. They were going to get through this, no matter how long it took, they would get through this.
Chapter 20
Alex and Zach made their way downstairs in the Scottish farmhouse finding Duncan and Margaret in the kitchen. Duncan was dressed for outdoors, “Before you go Duncan, can I just say thanks, being here with Zach it's helped me a lot, thank you.”
Alex smiled as Duncan got a slight blush, “Ach, it's nae bother little lady, ye know that! So I take it yer goin hame?” and Zach nodded pointing to the cases in the hallway.
Defender's Blood The Fallen (An Urban Fantasy) Page 17
