Forfeit

by Stoneley, Zara

  ‘Cat, I really don’t ’ He’d not noticed she was holding something in her hand, but now she flung it. He flinched, but it wasn’t directed at him. He watched, recognising his mobile as it hit the worktop with a force that left the air splintered. ‘What the fu --?’

  ‘I’m not some bloody plaything.’

  He took a step closer, then hesitated. His whole body wanted to follow his instincts, to close the gap, to hold her, but there was something so brittle about her that he was suddenly worried he’d make things worse, not better. ‘I never thought you were.’ He tried to keep his tone even, calm her down.

  ‘Or some fucking piece of meat. And don’t patronise me.’

  ‘Where the hell has that come from? That’s not fair, Cat, and you know it.’ He did take a step forward then; whatever had flipped in her head was shutting out all reason.

  ‘Fair? You think I should be fair with you? You you cheat.’ Her voice had the slightest trace of a crack and Brent suddenly didn’t want to continue this conversation. Cheat. She knew. But he couldn’t stop now. He couldn’t back out even if she did know. Even if she thought him the complete fraud that maybe he was. He’d played dirty, but he’d meant to own up. At the right time. But the time had never been right enough. Things had changed and one stupid decision had become a thousand times harder to own up to; one moment of greed, of lust overcoming common sense, had become a secret he hadn’t wanted to share. And to Cat, a secret meant betrayal.

  ‘Cat, listen …’ He held a hand up as if to ward the words off. ‘I may not be an angel but I never mean …’ What? Never meant to hurt her, was that what was on the tip of his tongue? His stomach felt hollow; filled with a dread that he’d just lost everything, that he’d stuffed up big time. He couldn’t let her do that to either of them. He could explain. He needed to get his hands on her, hold her, show her.

  ‘What didn’t you mean, you bastard? For me to find out that I was just some some easy, cheap lay for you, a way to pass the time? While you just put your posh girlfriend on hold?’

  His eyes locked with hers. She wasn’t making sense now.

  ‘Is that it? What kind of slut does that make her, just to be happy to wait?’ She gave a laugh; short, sharp, half-hysterical. He took another step closer. She’d dropped her defences; the fight was drifting out of her.

  ‘I bet you didn’t tell her you were fucking me every day, did you? Bet you didn’t tell her the rules had changed and you were living out your fantasies. Won’t she do these things for you, Brent? Is she one of those too posh to push types who won’t let you play your games?’ She’d sunk down on the floor now, her voice still biting but getting softer and more bitter as each individual word was spat out. He was close to her now, a foot away, and the green sparks of anger in her eyes were mingled with something that looked like defeat.

  ‘I trusted you, Brent.’ If he hadn’t been so close he wouldn’t have heard the words, wouldn’t have heard the note of resignation, of pain that was tugging at his heart.

  But she didn’t know what he’d really done, how he’d really cheated on her. This was something different. ‘I know you did.’ He hunkered down beside her, reaching out to brush her hair back, wincing as she jerked back as though he’d hit her. Different, but maybe just as bad.

  ‘Don’t you dare touch me! Go touch your darling Sophie.’

  His eyes had narrowed and for a moment Cat could have sworn he looked confused. But he hadn’t looked confused when he’d walked in. He’d looked guilty, guilty as hell. Then he’d looked almost relieved and now he was looking at her as if she was mad. She pointed at the mobile and almost wished she hadn’t hurled it. ‘Oh, I know all about your Sophie.’

  ‘What do you mean all?’ His voice had a defensive edge. ‘And why is she my Sophie?’

  She could remember exactly what was on the message, without even trying. She closed her eyes. ‘Brent, darling, are you there? I’m running slightly late. I’ll try your mobile, honey.’ She mimicked the silky tone that had snapped her to attention, stopped her in her tracks. That she’d played over and over again as she’d waited for him to come home; on the answerphone and then just in her head. Instant replay.

  And then there’d been the scathing tones of sympathy when she’d grabbed his mobile. The “oh, it’s you”, even though they’d never met as far as she knew, and the rest. Oh yes, the rest. ‘Too busy playing, is he? Just let him know I’ll see him at the usual place, will you? I must say I’m surprised you’re still there, honey; it always amazes me what girls like you will do for money. Still, soon be over, won’t it, and then he can get back to normal and we can carry on where we left off.’ On and on. ‘Well, you didn’t think it would last, did you? Once he got over the lust and got into your knickers. Girls like you never understand, do you? He needs to get back to women who understand what he needs, his own type. We could all see it, even if he couldn’t. He’s very generous, so I’m sure you’ll do well out of it, though that’s all you were there for in the first place, wasn’t it?’

  The bastard was laughing, and the self-pity deserted her.

  ‘Christ, Cat, she’s my solicitor and she was running late.’

  ‘And she calls you darling. Yeah, right.’

  ‘Girls like her just talk like that.’

  ‘And she knows all about us, and girls like me.’

  ‘She doesn’t know anything and she’s not my Sophie.’

  ‘Piss off.’

  ‘She was making it up, winding you up, Cat.’ His eyes had narrowed and she would have backed away, except there was nowhere to go. ‘All that shit yesterday about me having lots of women; that’s what you really think about me, is it? I enjoy women, I want to make them happy, but I’m not some gigolo who doesn’t know how to keep his cock in his pants, or why would I put up with a year of celibacy?’

  ‘Yes. Why, Brent, why the fuck did you?’

  ‘Because I wanted you, that’s why, and I wasn’t going to run away from something we both wanted.’ She glared at him, her breathing heavy.

  ‘I hate you.’

  He’d covered the ground between them with alarming ease and she scrambled to her feet. He was up close now, the glint in his eye a warning. He reached out, grasped her arms.

  ‘Let go.’

  ‘I’m not letting go, Cat.’ He grimaced. ‘You don’t hate me.’

  ‘You cocky bastard I’m not spending another minute here. I’m packing, leaving. Now.’

  ‘You can’t, Cat.’

  ‘Sod your stupid forfeit, I don’t care about the money.’

  ‘Where are you going, Cat? You haven’t got anywhere to go.’ She stopped struggling. He was right.

  ‘I’ll find somewhere. Let go.’ She pushed at the hard chest.

  ‘You’re not going anywhere until I’m done with you, until we’ve finished this.’ Then his hard mouth came down on hers. She struck out in panic with her fists, heard his slight grunt with satisfaction. But his hands had just tightened around her, the pressure of his lips on hers insistent. She tried to move her head, but one of his hands moved up, holding her firm, and then the other had moved to her bum, sending a shard of need through her.

  ‘I don’t …’ As she parted her lips to speak, his tongue sought out the inside of her mouth. For a second she melted against him, felt the familiar urges rush straight to her pussy as he sucked on her tongue. “Then we can carry on where we left off.” She yanked her head back, away from him. ‘Go back and shag your solicitor.’ She was aware she was panting slightly, the words uneven.

  ‘That would be unethical.’

  ‘It didn’t stop you before.’

  ‘Bollocks.’

  ‘She said …’

  ‘I don’t care what she said.’ He pushed her harder against the wall; effortlessly caught her flailing wrists.

  ‘Well, I fucking do.’

  ‘Language, kitty.’ There was a faint smile on his face, but dark intent in his eyes. ‘Have you any idea how hot you are when you�
��re angry?’

  ‘Piss off.’ She swallowed. His face was so close and there was a dangerous stillness about him.

  ‘Oh, Cat.’ He pinned her arms up above her head, and as she turned her head to escape the mouth she was sure was about to take her again his lips came against her neck instead. ‘Sophie is nothing.’ His warm breath sent a shiver through her. ‘Was nothing. Never has been anything.’ His hot mouth burnt a trail down her neck. ‘Never will be anything. But my solicitor.’ She pushed hard against his grip, her muscles tightening, but he didn’t even have to tense to keep her there. ‘Trust me, Cat.’

  ‘I don’t share.’ She spoke through gritted teeth, fighting the waves of pleasure that were threatening her self-control.

  ‘Nor do I.’ He sucked gently on the soft skin where her neck met her shoulder. She tried to yank away, but he moved his body tighter against hers, so tight she could feel his hard outline, feel every inch of him, and then his mouth was on hers again, and this time he didn’t want her to soften, he seemed to revel in her fight, forcing himself up hard against her, and she responded in the only way she could; with anger and lust. Her mouth hard against his, force against force, her tongue fighting the strength of his.

  ‘You’re mine.’ He was ripping her blouse open, his hand reaching to clamp firm over her breast and then her hands were clawing at his shirt, needing to see skin, to feel warmth.

  ‘I don’t belong to anyone.’ Her nails raked along his sides, watching with satisfaction as a ripple of awareness ran down his abs, as red angry weals marked his torso. Her breasts grew heavy under his dark, lust-filled gaze.

  ‘Oh, yeah?’ A hand was pushed roughly between her thighs, forcing them apart, ripping the delicate lace of her knickers, a strong finger working its way deep inside her.

  She cried out at the invasion, a rush of desire pooling around his hand. Shaky hands struggled with the buckle of his belt and then she had released the strong, hard cock, could feel the velvet warmth in her hand. She rubbed her palm over the top, spreading the white beads of moisture over the tip, the smell of him sending a new shot of arousal to her swollen pussy. He caught her hand, pinned it back above her head, his knee pushing her legs wider and then, with one hard thrust, he was inside her and she screamed with satisfaction as the muscles of her pussy contracted, sending her straight into orgasm. His hand was on her bum, pulling her closer to him, and he didn’t pause, thrusting steady, deep, each push triggering a new ripple through her body.

  Her legs wrapped instinctively around his waist and he held her firm, and as his mouth came down on hers, the thrust of his tongue deep into her mouth matched the thrust of his hips. He eased away, his hot mouth transferring to her pebbled nipple, pulling at it harshly until she cried out. Then he was gripping her tight, his eyes burning, locked with hers, each thrust taking them both closer to the explosion of want and need that rocked through their bodies.

  ‘I’m not finished with you yet.’ Brent spoke softly against her ear as she opened her eyes, his leg draped over hers, holding her down firm on the soft mattress. Her eyes were glazed but still wanting, in a languorous way that would have turned a saint.

  Gently, he rolled her unresisting onto her stomach, her soft body pliant, no fight left in limbs that were still heavy from sex. She murmured as he massaged between her shoulders, his hands gradually moving down, circling the small of her back, revelling in the small intakes of breath, the stirring of her hips.

  He pulled her gently to the edge of the bed, so her legs slipped over the edge, all the time rubbing, smoothing, and she closed her eyes, drifting with the pleasure. He let his hands drift further down, massaging into the soft, giving flesh of her buttocks, the feel of her smooth skin already stirring his cock. She mewed a slight objection as one finger slipped down further to her anus, wriggled her hips slightly. Slowly he circled the opening, then slipped his fingers down to her slit, fondling the labia that were still swollen, gently easing a way into the soft folds to a pussy that was already running with her juices. She moaned, relaxed against him, and he moved back up, and pushed against her anus with a finger that was slick with her cream, watching as her muscles contracted.

  ‘No, don’t …’ Her voice was sleepy, soft, an automatic objection.

  ‘Shh.’ His other hand massaged her butt cheeks, watching as she slowly relaxed back down, rubbed gently again with the juice-covered finger. ‘It’ll be good, trust me.’ Gradually she opened up under the pressure; gradually he edged his finger into her gorgeous arse, and the strong gasp of pleasure made him rock hard. His balls ached as he watched her finger slip deeper into her, her legs parting, her bum relaxing, and when he reached his other hand down and stroked her slit she was as hot and wet as she’d ever been.

  He pushed the knuckles of his hand against her and the muffled cry, ‘More,’ made his cock throb with new intensity. He pushed harder into her arse with his finger, at the same time pushing his fist firmer against her pussy, rolling against her swollen clit and he could feel her throbbing beneath his hands, feel the start of her orgasm. ‘Please fuck me, please.’ The soft cry of an invitation couldn’t be ignored, his cock sliding home all the way as her soft pussy clenched around him instantly. He pushed gently but insistently, wanting to saviour every moment of her, wanting to feel her orgasms pulsing around him before he came. Then he couldn’t hold back any longer and he held her hips firmly, pushing deeper, and the pounding of his heartbeat echoed in his ears along with the sound of his name.

  Cat wriggled round within the strong cocoon of his body, looked at the strong face, the broad nose, dark slightly raised eyebrows, high hard cheek bones. Shit, she loved him. That was the problem. She’d had no right to be furious yesterday but she had been damn well furious, and she knew it was because she’d been jealous. Jealous that after her there’d be someone else. Before her there’d been someone else. He’d had no reason to lie, why should he? After all, this was just a marriage of convenience. But she’d felt betrayed; she’d felt like his opinion of her was the same as Jamie’s had been in the end. That she was a slut; except for Jamie that had meant not good enough to be his wife, and for Brent it was a bonus. But she didn’t want to be just a good shag, a slut to move on from when he decided he wanted a proper wife.

  She’d opened up emotionally when she was a kid and where had that left her? Nowhere. Her mum had been right when she’d shut all the emotions off. It was easier that way. She’d learnt the lesson. No drama, no betrayal. Except it could send you mad, even though emotion could make you hurt in a whole different way.

  When she’d opened up physically with Jamie and been shunned again it had shocked something so deep inside her, made a mark that told her she wasn’t wanted, she shouldn’t try. But with Brent, she’d let herself feel emotionally and physically. Let him in.

  She’d shagged him that first time because, deep down, she had known he’d be good for her, that she needed a man like him. But even as she’d been shutting the door on him, he’d already been turning away as though he knew. Which was probably why, when he turned back, she’d agreed to marry him. Because she couldn’t walk away. And nor could he. She couldn’t ignore the pull any more. Because anything was better than running away from him. From herself.

  He’d forced her to be herself, to admit what turned her on, to show him. And now she realised that he’d forced her to open up and want in a different way. A way that left her open to jealousy, to caring. His arms tightened around her as she shifted. No way out. No easy way. Not now. But she didn’t want to leave.

  He might not love her, but he cared, and he desired, and he wanted her for what she truly was, not what she might have been.

  ‘Lie still, fidget bum.’ His voice was still sleep-laden.

  ‘Tell me about Sophie.’

  He groaned. ‘I told you, she’s a solicitor, she works for my solicitor.’

  ‘Clever, well educated?’

  ‘Mmm, very.’ He held her tighter, not opening his eyes.

&nb
sp; ‘Blonde, sexy?’

  ‘Yup, so they say.’

  ‘Why were you meeting her at the usual place?’ She couldn’t keep the note of sarcasm out of her voice. He’d laughed when she’d recounted the conversation.

  ‘The usual place is her office. She was winding you up. God, you’re so nosey.’

  ‘Why?’

  He groaned. ‘And so bloody persistent. She wanted to check through the divorce papers.’

  ‘Oh.’ Cat felt a rock plummet right down deep into her stomach. So it would soon be over; he was planning his escape already. He’d just have his sex and go.

  ‘I’d told her to leave it for now, which is why she was snarky with you.’ He rolled over onto his back, but didn’t let his grip loosen from round her waist, taking her with him. ‘I went out with her years ago. She wanted, erm, a merger, and she can’t accept I’d marry someone else.’

  ‘But she knows it’s not a proper marriage.’

  ‘No, she doesn’t. She wasn’t involved in drawing up our agreement; I thought it better to keep her out of it. Only Jules, her boss, knows.’

  ‘So why is she involved with the divorce?’

  ‘She’s not involved with anything, Cat; she picked up the papers because Jules has gone on long-term sick. He’d got the date pencilled in his diary so she did some digging and decided to call me. Christ, girl, is shagging you the only way to stop that brain whirring?’

  ‘It’s my divorce too; I’m entitled to know what’s going on.’

  ‘Huh.’ She could have sworn he sounded pissed, could have sworn his fingers tightened almost imperceptibly on her. ‘Don’t worry, I’m not going to do anything without telling you.’

  ‘Gee, thanks, such a gent.’

  ‘Stop trying to spoil things.’ He rolled back over, wrapped a strong arm round her and for a brief moment opened his eyes. ‘And stop worrying.’