Secret History of a Good Girl
Page 18
Mentally preparing for battle, she turned to watch him wait for a break in the streaming line of vehicles freed by the traffic signal. She’d had a moment to collect herself. To push aside her hurt. And that made way for the other growing emotion.
Anger was now riding shotgun with her pain.
When the line of cars stretched far enough apart, he jogged across the lane and came to a stop in front of her. “That absolutely qualified as running away.”
The words smashed the last of her restraint. “No.” She tried to stomp her foot, but her heel caught in the ground. Frustrated, she went on. “That was me refusing a proposal that was nothing more than an empty romantic gesture. And I’m not the one who’s running.” She finally wrenched her shoe free. “You are!”
“Alyssa—”
“You think you can just show up and offer me a ring in front of a crowd?” she said, her drawling words loud. “As if whippin’ out a piece of jewelry suddenly makes everything okay?” Her nails dug into her palms, and she forced herself to slow her words. “I don’t want you down on your knee. I don’t want a public proposal.” She stepped closer, looking up at him. “I want honesty.”
He crossed his arms, his tuxedo jacket drawing tight on his broad shoulders. “You want honesty? How about this? It’s hell watching your wife walk away, even if it’s mostly your fault.” Shocked by his admission, she was struck mute. The pause stretched, traffic now whizzing by on both sides. “And up until now there was no way I was going to put myself through that possibility again.”
She couldn’t belittle his fears, but she also couldn’t ignore her own. “She left because of the way you treated her.”
He didn’t bother to deny it. “Yes.”
“So how do I know this time will be different?”
He sighed and raked his hair from his forehead. “To start with, for once I’m actually in love.”
Her heart soared, but her head pounded, keeping her focused. “That’s wonderful. But let me tell you something. If you don’t have the actions to back it up, it won’t be enough.” Feeling surer of her argument, she tipped her chin, her voice stronger. “And you know what? You were right. I do deserve a life. And I’m not going to settle for less anymore. So if you want me, than you have to put yourself out there. Really take a risk. Because if you can’t—” She blinked back the stinging threat of tears. “If you can’t, we don’t stand a chance.”
“I don’t know where to start.”
“Start with telling me what you want.”
After a pause, Paulo held out his hand, the velvet box in his palm. “I want you,” he said as he flipped open the lid. “Marry me.”
A large diamond solitaire sparkled in the sun, and the pounding in her temples spread to her chest as she stared at it. Everything she wanted was right there in front of her. Unfortunately she hadn’t heard all she needed to hear.
A semi-truck swooshed by, kicking up a diesel-scented gust of air that blew her hair across her eyes. Blinking, she swiped away the strands, her hand shaking. But she remained silent.
With an apprehensive expression, he glanced around and then turned his gaze back to scan hers. “Is this not unromantic enough for you?”
“It’s not about the location. It’s about your words.”
After a brief hesitation, ring still displayed in his hand, he said quietly, “You’re not going to make this easy, are you?”
“Life isn’t easy. Marriage won’t always be easy.” She glanced down at the ring and back to his beautiful face, gathering her strength to press on. There was no other choice. “You have to convince me this time around will be different.”
His chest rose and fell on a huge breath. “Okay.” With a determined look, he stepped closer, his voice burning with the same intensity reflected in his eyes. “From the first moment you showed up at my hotel, sassing me by the pool, I’ve wanted you. I kept telling myself it was a temporary fling.” He frowned, looking down on her. “But I couldn’t let you go.”
“Maybe that was just the sex.”
“It was more than just sex.” He paused and shook his head. “But I was too dense to recognize it. And then you faced me down and sided with Bianca, and it was too painful to deal with.”
“I sided with the truth.”
He placed his fingers on her mouth, and her body instantly began to purr. She fought the urge to lean closer.
“I know that.” His eyes grew gentle, followed by his tone. “At least I do now.” His lips tipped up into that killer half-smile. “And a heartfelt confession strong enough to make up for some serious sins is hard to pull off when I keep getting interrupted.” He dropped his hand, and instantly her lips felt lonely.
She swallowed, her throat burning with emotion. “I’ll shut up.”
“Just until I finish.” He cupped her jaw with his free hand and shifted closer, until they were toe to toe, the offered ring still between them. “I’ve never been in love before, Alyssa.” His face was tight, a hint of fear beneath the sincerity. Her vision blurred, and she blinked hard at the tears as he continued. “Didn’t want to be in love. After my experience with family, all the rejection, I figured life was easier that way. Because after a while…” A flicker of raw pain crossed his face, cutting her deep. “A guy starts to wonder if there isn’t something inherently wrong with him.”
The sheen of tears finally breached her lashes, and her vision cleared as they slipped down her cheeks. The cocky charmer, full of self-doubt? Who would have guessed?
“Can I say something now?” she asked.
He rubbed the wet track on her face with his thumb. “Only if it’s something I want to hear.”
She laid a loving palm on his cheek, her voice full of conviction. “There is nothing wrong with you.” With a small sniff and a wobbly smile, she amended her statement. “At least nothing that a swift kick in the ass won’t fix.”
He chuckled softly. But as the amusement died away he grew serious again, his eyes searching hers. “I want to believe that. But I’m still scared senseless that you’ll discover you were wrong about me and take off. It’s a scary thought.” He sent her a look that was breathtakingly frank. “But nowhere near as scary as living the rest of my life without you.” Paulo glanced down at the ring he still held between them. “My arm is getting tired,” he said, and a flicker of panic crossed his face. “Please tell me you’ll marry me.”
She laid her palm on the box. “I’ll marry you.”
His fingers closed around her hand and he let out a sigh of relief, leaning his forehead against hers. His voice was rough, his hazel gaze glowing. “Now tell me you love me.”
Alyssa looked up at him, letting it all shine in her eyes. “I love you.”
His mouth closed over hers. With a tiny squeak of relief, she reached up with her free hand and gripped his lapel, pulling him closer. Paulo’s lips grew more insistent, and she savored the taste of him. The hard chest beneath her fingers.
A few discordant honks peppered the air, and a wolf whistle from a passing motorist had Alyssa pulling away. With shaking fingers, she smoothed the wrinkles she’d left on his jacket.
Paulo smiled as he stepped back, holding out his arms. “You never told me what you thought of my tuxedo.”
An unfamiliar feeling of joy bubbled up in her heart. “It will be perfect for our wedding.”
He shot her a suspiciously winning grin. “Hmm,” he said as he dropped his hands to her hips. “Now that we’re engaged, are you going to tell me how you got that file?”
Raising her eyebrows, she struggled to maintain a deadpan face. “It will be my gift to you on our fiftieth wedding anniversary.”
The mischievous spark in his eyes grew brighter, and he pulled her against him. It was like coming home. His voice went low, seductive. “Make it the twenty-fifth, and I guarantee it’ll be worth your efforts.”
Alyssa finally let out a laugh, giddy with happiness. “It’s a deal.”
“Do I still get to keep yo
u as my strategic partner?”
“Of course,” Alyssa said, sending him a smile that must rival the blazing sun above. “But you, Mr. Domingues, now hold the permanent number one position on my to-do list.”
* * * * *
ISBN: 9781459220607
Copyright © 2011 by Aimee Carson
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