Ravensdale's Defiant Captive
Page 13
His hands moved over her lightly, touching, exploring, discovering. He came to her breasts, lifting her top out of the way so he could access them. He swirled his tongue over and around her nipple, making her ache with longing as his teeth gently nipped and tugged at her flesh.
His hands skimmed down the sides of her body to grasp her hips, holding her tightly against the throb of his need. He made a deep sound at the back of his throat as she moved against him. A sound of approval, of want, of raw, primal lust.
‘Not here,’ he said as he swept her up in his arms and carried her towards his suite.
Holly noticed the balcony doors were open as she pulled him down with her on the mattress, but she pushed her fear away, not willing to be separated for a second in case he changed his mind. Her whole body was on fire. Pulsating with a longing so intense it was mind-blowing. Every part of her body was alive and sensitive. Every inch of her skin ached for his touch.
Julius must have read her mind for he began working on her clothes while she did her best to get him out of his. Her hands weren’t cooperating in her haste to feel his naked skin. They were fumbling in excitement, and he had to take over. Holly watched as he unbuttoned his shirt before shrugging it off and tossing it to the floor. She put her hands on his chest, spreading her fingers over his pectoral muscles, her palms tickled by the light covering of masculine hair sprinkled over his chest.
He came down to her to caress her breasts with his lips and tongue, making her squirm and shiver with delight with every movement he made. He kissed his way from her breasts down over her stomach, dipping his tongue into the shallow cave of her belly button before going lower.
Holly sucked in a breath when he came to the heart of her. The feel of his lips separating her and the sexy rasp of his tongue against her sensitive flesh made her arch her spine like a well-pleasured cat. The ripples of an orgasm took her by surprise, taking over her body, shaking it, tossing it into a maelstrom of ecstasy that made her gasp out loud.
But even as the pleasure faded he was stirring her to new feelings, new sensations, new anticipations, as he sourced a condom and positioned himself between her thighs.
His mouth came back to hers as he entered her in a slick, deep thrust that made her whole body quake in response. His thrusts were slow and measured at first, allowing her time to get used to him. But then as she breathlessly urged him on he upped the pace, deeper, harder, faster, until she was rocking against him for that final push into paradise. He reached between their bodies to give her that extra bit of friction that pitched her over the edge. She cried out as the sensations tore through her in a rush, delicious wave upon delicious wave, roll upon roll. He waited until she was coming down from the spike before he let go. Holly felt him tense and then spill, his whole body shuddering until he finally went still.
It was a new thing for Holly to lie in a man’s arms without wanting to push him off or rush off to the shower. It was a new thing for her to not feel uncomfortable with the silence. Not to have regrets over what her body had done or had had done to it by a partner. Her body was in a delicious state of lassitude, every limb feeling boneless, her mind drifting like flotsam.
After a moment Julius propped himself up on his arms to look at her. ‘Am I too heavy for you?’
Holly stroked her hands down to the dip in his spine. ‘No.’
He brushed a fingertip over her lower lip, his expression thoughtful. ‘I might’ve rushed you. It’s been a while.’
‘You didn’t,’ she said. ‘It was...perfect. You were perfect.’
He kissed her on the mouth softly. Lightly. ‘This is usually when I say I have work to do or head to the shower.’
‘Classy.’
He gave a wry smile. ‘If you give me a couple of minutes, I’ll be ready for round two.’
Holly arched her brows. ‘So this isn’t a one-off then?’
His eyes darkened as they held hers. ‘Is that all you want?’
She shrugged noncommittally and looked away. ‘The itch has been scratched, hasn’t it?’
He took her chin between his finger and thumb and made her look at him. ‘This isn’t the sort of itch that can be cured with one scratch.’
Holly kept her expression screened. ‘What’re you suggesting? A fling? A relationship? Not sure what your family would have to say about you and me hanging out as a couple. Or the press, for that matter.’
His frown pulled at his forehead like stitches beneath the skin. ‘What I do in my private life is my business, no one else’s, including my family.’
‘What about Sophia?’
‘What about her?’
Holly tiptoed her fingers up his spine to the back of his neck where his hair was curling. ‘What’s she going to say when she finds out we’re sleeping together?’
‘We won’t tell her.’
Holly laughed. ‘Like that’s going to work. She’ll know as soon as she comes back.’
He rolled away and got off the bed to dispense with the condom, a deep frown still dividing his forehead. He picked up his trousers and stepped into them, zipping them up with unnecessary force. ‘What’s your caseworker going to say when you tell her about us?’
‘I’m not going to tell her,’ Holly said. ‘Why would I? It’s none of her business.’
Julius scooped his shirt and thrust his arms into the sleeves. ‘We can’t continue this. It’s wrong. I shouldn’t have allowed it to happen. I’m sorry; I take full responsibility.’
Holly swung her legs over the edge of the bed and reached for her nearest article of clothing. ‘Yeah, well, I guess it was just a pity thing on your part, huh?’
‘What?’ His tone was sharp, shocked...annoyed.
‘You only slept with me because you felt sorry for me after I told you about my crappy childhood.’
His frown was so deep his eyebrows met over the bridge of his nose. ‘That’s not true.’
She gave him a direct look. ‘Isn’t it?’
He scraped a hand through his hair. ‘No. Yes. Maybe. I don’t know.’
Holly finished pulling on her clothes before she came over to him. ‘It’s fine, Julius. Stop stressing. I’m okay with a one-off. Doesn’t make sense to get too cosy, since I’ll be on my way in a couple of weeks.’
He looked at her for a long, pulsing moment. ‘I suppose you got what you wanted.’
She arched a brow. ‘That being?’
‘From the moment you stepped into this place, you had your mind set on getting me to break, didn’t you?’ he said. ‘It was your goal. Your mission. You did everything you could to prove I couldn’t resist you. Well, you were right. I couldn’t.’
Holly was a little ashamed of how close to the mark he was. But what was even more concerning was how she had ended up wanting him more than she had wanted anyone. She didn’t know how to handle such want. Such longing. The need was still there. It was a sated beast that would all too soon wake again and be growling, prowling for sustenance. Even now she could feel her body stirring the longer she looked into Julius’s dark navy eyes with their glittering cynicism.
‘What will you do now you’ve achieved your goal?’ he said. ‘Give a tell-all interview to the press?’
Holly shifted her gaze from his in case he saw how hurt she felt. ‘You have serious trust issues.’
He laughed. ‘I have trust issues?’
She swung back to glare at him. ‘Do you really think I would share my body with you and then tell everyone about it? I’d be hurting myself more than you.’
‘They pay big money for scandalous stories. Big money. You could set yourself up on this.’
Holly pressed her lips together as she went in hunt of her shoes but she could only find one. Frustration and hurt tangled in a tight knot in her chest, making it hard for her to breathe. She had giv
en him every reason to think she would sell out to score points against him. The shaming truth was a few days ago she might well have done it. But something had changed. She had changed. His touch, his concern, his promise of protection had made something inside her shift. She couldn’t find a way to reassemble herself. It was as if the puzzle pieces of her personality had been scattered and she didn’t know how to get them back into order. The things she had wanted before were not what she wanted now.
It was disturbing—terrifying—to allow her nascent hopes and dreams to get a foothold. For the first time in her life, she’d caught a glimpse of what it would be like to be secure in a relationship. To be with a man who looked out for her, who wanted the best for her, who would help her reach her potential instead of sabotaging it. To be honoured and cherished. To be celebrated instead of ridiculed. To be accepted.
To be trusted.
To be loved.
Holly took a scalding breath and forced herself to look at him. ‘I guess you’d better call Natalia and get her to take me away, then.’
Something passed over his features. ‘No.’
‘Why not?’ Holly said, trying to squash the bubble of hope that bloomed in her chest. ‘I’m nothing but trouble. I belong in jail, or so you said the other day.’
He let out a long breath and came back to where she was standing. He put his hands on her hunched shoulders, his touch as light as goose down but as hot as fire. ‘You’re not going anywhere.’
She ran the point of her tongue out over her paper-dry lips. ‘I wouldn’t have done it. I wouldn’t have called the press.’
He gave her shoulders a light squeeze. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘It’s okay. I get that you want to keep your privacy secure,’ Holly said. ‘I haven’t exactly given you the impression I’m someone you could trust.’
He tipped up her chin with the tip of his finger. ‘What am I going to do with you, Holly Perez?’
Holly looked into his sapphire-blue gaze. ‘You could start by kissing me.’
He pressed a soft kiss to her mouth. ‘Then what?’
She tilted her head as if thinking about it. ‘You could put your hand on my breast.’
He cupped her breast through her clothes, his eyes glinting. ‘And then what?’
She moved closer, letting her breath mingle with his as she slipped her hands around his neck. ‘Figure it out,’ she said, and his mouth came down and sealed hers.
CHAPTER TEN
A FEW DAYS later Holly watched as Julius slept. He was a quiet sleeper, not restless and fidgety like her. She could have watched him for hours, memorising his features, storing them in her mind for the time when she would be gone from his life. She had been playing a game of pretend with herself over the past few days, a silly little game where she wouldn’t have to leave at the end of the time she had left.
She had even been so foolish as to picture her and Julius building a life together. Having a family together. Building a future together. Things she had never allowed herself to dream of before. She hadn’t even realised she wanted those things until now. Every day she spent in his company she found herself wanting him more. Not just physically, although that had only got better and better. It was more of an intellectual connection, one she had never felt with anyone else. He inspired her, excited her, and challenged her.
Holly traced one of his eyebrows with her fingertip. ‘Are you awake?’
‘No.’
She smiled and traced the other eyebrow. That was the other thing she liked about him—he had a sense of humour underneath all that gruff starchiness. ‘Are you dreaming?’ she said.
‘Yes, of this hot girl who’s in my bed touching me with her clever little hands.’
Holly reached down and stroked his swollen length. ‘Like this?’
‘Mmm, just like that.’
‘And in this dream did that same girl slide down your body like this?’ She moved down his body, letting her breasts touch him from chest to groin.
‘That’s it,’ he said in a low growl. ‘I never want to wake up.’
She sent her tongue down the length of his shaft, then swirled it over the head and around the sensitive glans.
‘Condom, querida.’
‘I want to taste you.’
He muttered an expletive as she opened her mouth over him, drawing on him until he was breathing heavily. ‘You don’t have to...’
‘I want to,’ Holly said. ‘You do it to me. Why shouldn’t I do it to you?’
‘I’ve never had someone do it in the raw before.’
‘Lucky me to be the first.’
He frowned for a moment but it soon disappeared as Holly got to business. She watched him as she drew on him, her own excitement building as she saw the effect she was having on him. He pulled out just as he spilled, the erotic pumping of his essence thrilling her in a way she hadn’t expected.
He threaded his fingers through her hair in long, soothing strokes that made her scalp tingle in delight. ‘Holly...’
She looked up from where she had been resting her cheek against his stomach. ‘What?’
He had one of his deep-in-thought frowns on his forehead. After a moment the frown relaxed as he smiled faintly. ‘Just... Holly.’
She stroked his stubbly jaw. ‘Not getting all sentimental on me, are you?’
The frown was back. ‘What do you mean?’
Holly propped herself on one elbow as she trailed her fingers up and down his chest. ‘This is just for now. Us, I mean. I’m going to England once I’m done here.’
He pushed her hand away and got off the bed. ‘I know you are. I’m glad you are. It’s the right thing to do.’ He pulled on a bathrobe and tied the belt, his expression shuttered.
‘You don’t sound very happy about it.’
He threw her an irritated look. ‘Why wouldn’t I be happy about it?’
She gave a shrug. ‘Thought you might miss me.’
‘I will but that doesn’t mean I want you to stay.’
Holly sat up and pulled her knees into her chest. ‘I wouldn’t stay if you asked me.’
‘I’m not going to ask you.’
‘Fine. Glad we got that settled.’
He went to the balcony doors and unlocked them. Holly stiffened. ‘What are you doing?’
‘I want some fresh air.’
Bitterness burned in her gullet. ‘You’re only doing that to get rid of me. It’s cruel, Julius. You know how much it freaks me out. I thought you understood. I’ll only come in here if those doors are closed.’
‘It’s just a balcony, for God’s sake.’
Tears sprouted but Holly tried to blink them back. ‘It’s not just a bloody balcony!’ She got off the bed, pulling the sheet with her to cover herself. ‘I spent hours and hours—years—of my life frightened out of my wits, and now you’re using that fear, exploiting that fear, to push me away because you’re scared of how you feel about me leaving.’
He flung the doors wide open and stepped out on to the balcony, standing with his back to her as he looked out over the estate.
Holly felt a gnarled knot of emotion clog her throat. Her heart was beating too fast, too erratically. Her skin was icy-cold and then clammy-hot. Her vision blurred with tears. She tried to get away but the sheet wrapped around her halted her progress. She tripped, stumbled and then fell in an ungainly heap on the floor.
‘Are you all right?’ Julius was by her side in seconds.
Holly batted his hand away. ‘No, of course I’m not all right. Close the freaking doors, will you?’
He gripped her chin between his finger and thumb. ‘You’re fine, Holly. Look at me. You’re fine. No one’s going to hurt you.’
She glared at him. ‘You hurt me. You did. You shouldn’t h
ave done that.’ Tears leaked out of her eyes in spite of all she did to try and stop them. She landed a punch on his arm but it glanced off as if she had hit stone. ‘You sh-shouldn’t have done that.’
‘Hey...hey...hey...’ He drew her against him, resting his chin on top of her head as he gently stroked her back in soothing circles. ‘It’s all right, querida. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it. I’m sorry. Shh, don’t cry.’
‘I’m not c-crying.’
‘Of course you’re not.’ He kept stroking her, holding her.
‘I’m angry, that’s all.’
‘Of course you are. You have every right to be. I was being a jerk.’
‘If you want me to leave the room or get out of your life just say so, okay?’ she said against his chest. ‘I can take a hint. I’m not stupid.’
There was a deep silence.
Holly listened to the sound of his breathing. Felt the steady rise and fall of his chest against her cheek and the slow beat of his heart. Felt his hand gently stroking her hair, his chin resting on top of her head. Felt her heart squeeze at the thought of how soon this was going to end.
Before she knew it, she would be on her way to a new life in England. The only contact she would have with him would be seeing articles about his family in the press. She wasn’t falling in love with him. She wasn’t. It was just that he was so...so different from all the men she had met in the past. He was impossibly strong, yet tender when he needed to be. He was a control freak but that showed he had discipline and self-control. He was a man with honour and standards. No one had ever taken the time to get to know her like he had done. He was interested in what made her the person she was and he inspired her to become who she was meant to be.
How could she not feel a little regret over her imminent departure? It was normal. It didn’t mean she was falling in love with him. She had never been in love before and didn’t intend to be now. She had seen first-hand the damage loving someone could do. You lost your power, your autonomy, your self-respect and your freedom. Love was a trap. A cage that, once you were in, you couldn’t get out of. That wasn’t what she had planned for her life.