Her Ride

by Rachael Orman

  “Why don’t you?” I moaned as I quickly unbuttoned my jeans, sliding down the zipper before immediately reaching for his. His larger hands grabbed both of mine and clasped them together. "Come on, fuck me before you leave.”

  “You don’t really want to do it out here. It’s all dirty.” Ellis leaned forward, planting a kiss on my forehead. I yanked my hands out of his and zipped up my pants angrily. I pushed at his shoulder as I glared at him.

  “Go off and do whatever the fuck you need to do.” I sneered at him, slipping past him and taking a few steps towards my bike. A hand on my arm had me spinning around, slamming me against Ellis’ hard body.

  “What just fucking happened?” He asked, confusion all over his face.

  “I’m not a god damn doll, Ellis. Stop acting like it. . So what if I had a shit relationship? It happens. So what if I had bad shit happen to me in the past? I don’t fucking care, why do you? I’m not some prissy little fucking doll that you have to use soft hands and careful caresses with. I hate that shit. It’s not me. I want it hard, I want it rough. Pull my hair, slap my ass, fuck me against the garage wall for god’s sake… That’s what I want. Hell, you are Dirty; I would think you know what I’m talking about!” I pushed against him, but his strong arms held me tight against him.

  “I just want you to know you are special. You aren’t another one of the whores around here. You deserve to be treated as such. I don’t know how else to show you that.” Ellis brushed his thumb over my cheek.

  “Yeah, I know that’s how you want to treat me. I’m fine with that every now and then, but Ellis, that’s not how I want it all the time. Don’t you get it? I like when you spank me, I like when you fuck me hard. I LIKE that. If you want to know, that’s how Jeremiah and I started down the road we ended up on. He liked it, I liked it, only he liked to push my limits. Then one day it no longer mattered what I wanted only what he wanted. Before long, it wasn’t only in the bedroom; it was all day, every day. I would never have asked you or let you touch me like that if I didn’t know you are different and know that you pay attention to me and my body. I don’t want soft shit, I want you.” I took a deep breath and stared at Ellis’ chest for a moment before meeting his eyes again. "Maybe this is just a sign that we won’t work for more reasons than I realized. So, big boy, this is the only time I’m going to say this. Step up and give it your all or don’t play at all.” I pushed at his chest, and this time, he let me step out of his embrace.

  I could see the surprise on Ellis’ face; yet again, he’d underestimated me. Shaking my head in disappointment, I took the remaining steps to my bike and fired it up. Before I could back out of the garage, Ellis was at my side. He grabbed both sides of my face and kissed my lips hard. “If that’s how you want it. That’s how you’ll get it.” Ellis said loudly before stepping back. My turn to be stunned. I watched as he walked backwards towards the house and disappeared inside. Shaking my head, I finished backing out and took off down the driveway.

  After cruising around the city for a few hours, I finally turned around and made my way back to the house. I retreated to my room once I locked up the garage and my bike. It was quiet in the house. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that it was empty, but it was never empty. There were always a couple of the guys around somewhere. I wasn’t much in the mood for company anyway. After lying on my bed watching TV for an hour, I got hungry, so I went to the kitchen where Monk and another guy were chatting and drinking beer.

  “What’s for dinner?” Monk asked me.

  “Why the fuck would you ask me? I was just coming to see what we had.” I gave him a look that said I clearly thought he had lost a few marbles. I opened the cabinets and fridge to find a serious grocery shopping trip was needed. “Fine. Who wants Chinese?”

  Both men groaned but gave in when I said that it was the only place I knew of that delivered besides pizza, and that didn’t sound good. After digging in the junk drawer, I found the menu I knew Patrick usually left stashed there. I made the call and sat in the living room with the men to wait for the food to arrive. Instead of any type of intellectual conversation, I got to hear about the other guys' latest whore venture. His name was Sludge and I’d be willing to guess it was because he was a big boy who probably didn’t move much faster than, well sludge. The story I was so lucky to hear sounded about as sexy as dogs having sex - gross, hairy and not something I would ever want to see if I could avoid it.

  Part of it probably had to do with the fact that the guy was covered with a thick layer of dark hair, which I imagined extended under the short sleeve shirt he had on under his cut. As thankful as I was for his story to end, Monk started to share his best sex story. I groaned inwardly, while Monk was much better looking than Sludge, I thought of him as more of a brother than anything and didn’t want to hear all the dirty details of his sex life. I’d caught him years ago having sex at one of the parties, but I had finally managed to bleach that experience from my mind. When the doorbell rang, I happily jumped up, thankful for the escape. I wasn’t in the mood for sex talk tonight, not with the guys, not with anyone. I just wanted food and sleep.

  I paid for the food and set it all down on the kitchen counter. I quickly piled my plate with what I wanted before it got swallowed up by the bottomless pits. I went to the game room and turned the TV on, hoping the men would stay in the living room or kitchen. They didn’t. They followed me and sat on either side of me on the couch. We ate in silence, and when I got up to put my plate away, Sludge stood too. Ignoring him, I returned to the kitchen, putting my plate in the sink and nearly jumped when I realized Sludge was right behind me.

  “Whoa there, sweet thing.” Sludge grinned, showing me that he was missing a few teeth as he put a large hand on my arm. I stepped to the side, but he followed, closing me in on either side with his hands on the counter. His large, round, hard belly was pushing into me as he kept the too large smile on his face. There was nothing worth smiling about; he was trapping me and it made my stomach turn.

  “Sludge, back off. I’m not in the mood for this shit tonight. Plus, Monk will be coming in anytime now.” I held his gaze, trying not to show that he did kind of frighten me. He had at least a hundred pounds, if not more, on me. I’d successfully fought men his size in the past, but he’d outmaneuvered me by getting me cornered. It also didn’t help that I wasn’t in the right frame of mind after everything that had happened with Jeremiah.

  “Oh, Monk isn’t going anywhere. I made sure there’d be a few whores to keep him occupied as soon as we left the room." Sludge ran his tongue up the side of my face as I clutched the counter with my sweaty hands. “You are all mine, you sweet little thing. See, I heard that you were fucking Dirty and figured it was time I got some grade ‘A' ass too. Plus, it’s part of the deal. You were my reward.”

  “What the fuck are you talking about?” I shoved against his shoulder as I glanced around, but it was just us in the kitchen and all the counters were cleared of anything I could use against him. “I'm not fucking Dirty, and I’m certainly not going to fuck you.”

  “Ah, but don’t you see? You don’t get a choice in this, sweet thing. I will have that pussy and ass as many times as I can before the night is over, then I have to hand you over to Scrapes. Wrench and Dirty made it so easy to get my hands on you too. Left you here all alone, just waiting for me to snatch you up.” He thrust his large hips against me, and when I sneered at the movement, he wrapped my braid around his hand, jerking my head back. He exhaled his sour beer breath in my face. “And I’m gonna enjoy tearing into your ass so much.”

  “Fuck off. Wrench is going to kill you when he finds out about this.” I spat angrily at him as he used my hair to turn me around and shove my face down towards the counter top.

  “Then I guess I’ll just have to make sure he doesn’t find out about it. You see, I planted listening devices; Scrapes and us have been listening in to all the conversations in the house. It works out rather nicely with you though. I know you are pl
anning a trip to DC. I’ll just make him think that you left early and don’t want to talk to him till you get settled. By the time he figures it out, I’ll be long gone.” Sludge bucked his hips into my ass as I fought to keep my hands out of his, but he managed to wrangle both of my hands into his larger hands, grasping them tightly. He bent them behind my back using one of his hands to hold both of mine before grabbing my braid again. Yanking my head to the side, his foul smelling, hot breath blew in my face again. “I heard you and Dirty fucking, talking and spewing sweet shit to each other in the middle of the night. It’s disgusting really. You turned a good man into a whiny little bitch. He killed the motherfucker that raped you. Did you know that?”

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t even know who raped me.” I groaned as he released my hair and held me down with a forearm across my shoulders.

  “Oooooh. Nobody told you, huh? Interesting.” Sludge had a sick smile on his face from what I could see out of the corner of my eye as he leaned closer so his lips brushed my ear. “Jeremiah was the one who raped you.”

  I gasped. I couldn’t help it.

  “That’s right. Your boy was the one who shoved it into your dry pussy only to come back later and seduce you into a relationship. That sick little fucker whined and cried and spilled all his secrets, anything to try to escape his eventual end." Sludge laughed against my ear. “Little shit even pissed himself when he realized there was no chance of getting away alive. Dirty broke every single one of his bones before he died. That’s when I knew something was going on with you and Dirty. I’ve never seen him give out such a brutal punishment, unless we are trying to get some information from someone. We didn’t actually want anything from Jeremiah. Nothing but pain, anyway.”

  I wanted to puke. I could feel bile rising up my throat at the thought that Jeremiah had been the one that had held me down and raped me. That couldn’t be right. It couldn’t.

  While my mind was still reeling from the revelation, I heard a loud bang at the front door followed by the sound of running boots. Sludge yanked me up with my wrists in one hand, hair in the other. Just as he turned toward one doorway in the kitchen, Ellis filled it. A whole lot of pissed off radiated from him, his chest rapidly rising as he breathed.

  “Really, Sludge?” Ellis’ voice boomed, filled with disappointment as he assessed the situation. “Let her go. Let’s handle this between us men.”

  “Don’t talk to me like that. You have no idea what I’ve been through. You are so used to just taking whatever you want and to hell with the rest of us in the club." Sludge yelled at him, yanking my head back harder. I refused to make a sound or react. I didn’t want to distract Ellis or give Sludge pleasure knowing that it hurt like a son of a bitch. “Scrapes told me how you and Wrench are skimming off the top of the profits, keeping it for yourselves instead of sharing with us, the ones that are on the streets keeping everyone in line. The ones making all the sacrifices. I lost my wife because of the all the time I spent keeping Wrench happy, doing his fucking bidding. And what for? Huh? For him to fuck me out of my share of profits.” He was yanking on my hair more and more as he shouted at Ellis.

  “Scrapes don’t know shit. Sludge, you know better than to get involved in his bullshit. You know how he is. He’s always looking for a way to start a fight in our club. You are like family here. You should have come to us before doing something like this.” Ellis held up both his hands showing he was unarmed and not trying to fight. “Especially before going this far. Just let Ryan go. She has nothing to do with any of this shit.”

  “The bitch gives me leverage.” Sludge ran his nose up my neck causing me to grind my teeth together in disgust. “It’s too bad really; I was just about to take her upstairs and give her a taste of what it’s like to have a good lay for once in her life.” He thrust his hips into my ass as he spoke. My teeth snapped together, but I managed to not make a comment or react other than that.

  “I’m telling you; you don’t want to go there,” Ellis growled taking a step closer to us, his fists balled at his sides. He’d instantly gone from the nice guy to the Ellis that if you were smart, you listened to. I hadn’t seen Ellis fight recently, but I’d seen him many times when we were younger and he always won. He wasn’t afraid to fight dirty if that meant he came out on top. He probably weighed as much as Sludge, only he was all muscle while Sludge was the opposite.

  “Oh, that’s right. You and her have some fuck buddy thing going on,” Sludge laughed stepping back from Ellis. He moved his arm to wrap it around my torso, trapping both of my arms at my sides. Or he tried to, but I used that split second of freedom to elbow him as hard as I could in the gut as I stomped on his foot. I spun around to send the heel of my hand into his nose, breaking it with a sweet cracking sound. Before I could make another move, Ellis had me wrapped in his arms, pulling me out of the room as I kicked my feet in the air towards Sludge; Patrick and Monk had jumped on Sludge from the other entrance though.

  “Are you okay?” Ellis asked, running his hands over my head and down my shoulders while his eyes surveyed my face.

  “Yeah, I’m fine.” I pushed his hands away from me. I rubbed my pounding forehead. My head was clouded and unable to make sense of everything at once. "Wait, why are you here? I thought you were going to be gone for a few days.”

  “We found out there was a leak from the inside. So in order to find out who it was, we left hoping they would make a move.” Ellis winced as he talked, which told me so much more than his words did.

  “You used me as bait? You were hoping that by leaving me here alone, they would come after me?” I stepped back from him. Hurt washed through me unexpectedly. My eyes dilated as I met his eyes, and that hurt more than I could vocalize or I’d be tearing into him.

  “Well, that’s not exactly what we thought. We didn’t know what they were going to do. We just hoped they would make a move to get more information or something." Ellis sighed, stepping towards me. His hands reached for me as I warily stepped back, holding my hands up to keep him back. “But I won’t deny that we thought it was an added element of temptation to leave you here without either of us to protect you. No, don’t give me that look. We were never far away."

  I screwed up my face at him and slapped at his hands that were still reaching for me. “You have no idea what happened when you were gone. Only a few more minutes… or had I made it easier for him… it could’ve been a totally different situation than you had come into. Fuck off. I’m not kidding. Leave me the fuck alone." I pushed past him and stomped upstairs. Throwing my backpack onto the bed, I started throwing the clothes I wanted on top of it from my dresser.

  “What are you doing, Ryan?” Ellis asked from the door. At least the dumb ass was wise enough to stay away from me. He leaned against the open door frame, his hands tucked into his pockets.

  “I’m packing. I was already thinking about leaving early to DC. I think this just about topped the cake. I’m so done with this shit. I’m done with this place." I moved to the bathroom to stuff the few things I couldn’t live without into a small bag and then threw that on top of the small heap on my bed.

  “You can’t leave right now.” Ellis stepped into the room and tried to step in front of me as I gathered the last of what I wanted to take from the closet. I tried to side step him, but he was faster, moving in front of me again. Finally, I sighed and looked up at his chin. I refused to meet his eyes; I was too angry. “I’m sorry. Please, calm down.”

  “No. You fucking used me. You could’ve told me, damn it. I would have gone along with it. I would do anything to help the club, you both know this; instead, you hid it and put me in a situation that I could’ve avoided had I been more on alert.” I slapped both my hands against Ellis’ chest in anger. Balling my hands, I hit his chest again as I met his eyes, tears welling in them even though I told myself not to do it. “Fuck you for being the big strong man that has to protect the little woman. Fuck you for your stupid he-man thinking that alm
ost got me even more screwed up than I already am. Fuck you for not realizing that you might not have emotional scars, but I do. While I don’t talk about and dwell on mine, they are massive and I deal with them every single god damn day. I most certainly don’t want or need any more of them.”

  “Stop, god damn it. I’m sorry. I tried to get here as soon as we figured out their plan.” Ellis dropped to his knees in front of me, wrapping his arms around my waist, pressing his face against my stomach. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt you. I want to make you feel better. I want to make everything better for you. Yet, all I seem to do is make things worse. Baby, don’t you see, it’s not you that is fucked up in this relationship? It’s me. I will never be good enough for you. I will never be as good as you need me to be. I continue to fail you time and time again. Maybe you were right before. Maybe we just aren’t meant to be together."

  I pulled at his hands, peeling his fingers away, until he finally released me and sat back on his knees, completely dejected. I slowly lowered myself to my knees in front of him. Lifting my hand, I placed it on the center of his chest, slowly moving it up until I could lift his face to meet mine. “You are so much better than I will ever deserve. Don’t you get it? I am the unworthy one. We will never work long term. There is just too many things working against us, but I’ll make you a deal. We can give it our all, be together any way that you want during our trip to DC, but when we get there, you leave me. No questions, no contact, nothing. We'll use the time until then to get each other out of our systems and part ways to find a healthier relationship.”