Lost (The Everett Gaming Series Book 5)

by Drew Sera

  “My dad was telling Blake that Anthony could use some physical contact, just like Sydney. Too bad you can only touch him when he’s asleep, or if your name is Colin or Sydney.” He looked up and examined Anthony’s monitors. “Damn fever.” Matt glanced up at me and then closed his eyes. I knew he was trying to calm himself down and his frustration over Anthony not letting him get close was evident.

  “Matt, you’re tired. You need to sleep too. Maybe you should go home with your dad and come back tomorrow,” I suggested.

  Matt shook his head. “No, you guys are my family. I’m not leaving.”

  “Matt, you’ve got to rest,” Blake agreed.

  Somehow Blake and I were able to get Matt to lie down on the bench seat in the room. He needed to sleep. I sat in a chair between Sydney and Anthony and listened to their monitors keeping up with them. As long as the monitors were making noise and beeping, I still had them.

  Anthony started to stir and moved around some in his sleep. I stood and went over to the edge of his bed and watched him toss and turn. He looked like he was in agony. I wondered if he was having a nightmare or in pain. A nurse came in a few minutes later to check on him and she smiled at me.

  “Are you guys friends or family?” She asked me quietly while poking on a tablet with a stylus.

  “Family. And best friends,” I said as I looked down at Anthony.

  “I think he will do better down here rather than up in the ICU. He had excellent doctors up there, Dr. Reid made sure of that. But, I think he will do better in the company of family and friends.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  She smiled again as she headed out of the room. I sat down next to Anthony’s bed and gripped his hand. I took hold of it and was surprised at how much calmer I felt.

  “Anth, I wish your body would get rid of this fever and infection. I know you’re trying.” I glanced down at my watch and then over to Sydney. She was sleeping soundly still, and so was Matt.

  I thought about what Blake had told us about how Anthony nearly died out in the woods. Blake and Detective Prestin said it was self-defense. Honestly, Paul had it coming. If Paul had killed Anthony or Sydney, I really don’t know what I would have done. I squeezed Anthony’s hand and whispered, “Anth, I have our kitten’s collar with me. Gina brought it a couple days ago when she brought some clothes for you and Sydney. I want to wait until you’re awake so we can put it on her together. Maybe we can do that tomorrow.”

  I had fallen asleep snuggled up to Sydney but woke up to her being restless. Matt and I woke her up in case she was having a nightmare. I didn’t want her to suffer through them if at all possible.

  When her eyes opened and she focused on me, she began crying. I held her close and repeated she was safe. I needed very badly for her to hear that often and to begin to believe it.

  While I was trying to calm her, I felt her body still and then she looked up at me.

  “Anthony?” Her eyes left mine and gazed over to the rest of our V. She looked back at me for confirmation with hope in her eyes. I nodded and smiled at her.

  Matt helped me take Sydney over to Anthony’s bed and let her lie down with him for a little bit. They both needed to feel one another and it brought me immense joy to be close to them.

  Sydney rest her head on Anthony’s left shoulder and put her hand over his side. I sat down next to the bed and eventually let my head rest on a pillow against Sydney’s back and hugged her against me. I put my hand across her body to rest on top of her hand. In that moment, I felt like everything was going to be all right. I had Sydney and Anthony both tucked safely under my arms.

  Chapter 9

  Wednesday, January 29th

  Anthony

  Fuck me. I didn’t dare try to open my eyes. My head hurt and I felt like I had knives sticking in my chest and sides. I’ve been trying to not press the button for the pain medication. Matt was doing it for me though.

  At least I wasn’t sick to my stomach at the moment. That has been less than pleasant. I felt like something was pressing down on me and shifted my weight some.

  It felt like there was a hand covering some bandages near my side scar. Without opening my eyes, I moved my hand to check it out, and sure enough I bumped into a man’s hand. It was an odd feeling because the hand felt soft too.

  Risking the pain behind my eyes, I opened them slowly and looked downward. A head of light brown hair filled my line of sight and my heart began to pound.

  “Sunshine,” I whispered.

  Next thing I knew, Matt and Colin were both standing up on either side of the bed. It was Colin’s hand I felt too. Sydney’s hand was over my scar and Colin’s was on top of hers.

  I didn’t care about my head pain all of a sudden, and bolted upright and looked down at Sydney to make sure it really was her. I wasn’t sure if I had dreamed up last night when I saw her. This medication has left me weary and unsure of what was going on around me.

  She had been asleep, but was starting to wake up despite Matt telling me she needed her rest. Fuck, I know it was selfish of me but I just had to look in her eyes.

  “Sunshine, fuck, I’ve missed you.” I leaned back so I could look at her but Matt and Colin just encouraged me to hold her. I pulled her against me and eased back on the pillows. The room was very dim and Matt told me that it was early in the morning. I didn’t even know what day it was and I didn’t fucking care. Sydney was in my arms.

  “Anthony,” she whispered my name, and the mere sound of her sweet voice nearly caused me to lose control of the tears in my eyes. I stroked her hair and held her close.

  “Yeah, sunshine, I have you.”

  I could feel her cheek moving against my skin. She was smiling.

  “I just wanted to hear you call me sunshine.”

  I gently hugged her and fought to stay awake after a little while. Fucking medicine. I allowed myself to drift off to sleep with her in my arms and Colin and Matt by my side.

  I felt a heavy weight on my back that was holding me down to the ice-cold ground. I was face down and when I moved, a heavy hand gripped the back of my neck. A deep voice told me to keep quiet and not move. I thought I recognized the voice but couldn’t place it. I felt a terrible pain in my stomach and instinctively moved but the hand gripped my neck tighter.

  “Anthony, wake up…Anth,” Matt shook me gently and my eyes shot open. My heart was pounding and I was trying to get my bearings straight. Fuck, I was in the hospital. It was light outside and Matt’s folks were in the room talking quietly with Gina.

  Matt and Blake were both standing by me and were looking down at me. I hated being laid up like this. I swallowed hard and found my throat to be as dry as sand and began coughing. Fuck, had I dreamt that Sydney was in my arms?

  I sat up and took the cup of water from Matt’s outstretched hand. I was shaking and set the cup down before any comments were made or anyone noticed.

  “Sydney…was I dreaming that?”

  Blake and Matt stepped to the side and opened my view to the other bed in the room where my sunshine was sleeping in Colin’s arm. My body ached when I saw them. I missed them so much. I ached to be cuddled up with Sydney between Colin and I.

  “Fuck. I thought it was a dream.”

  “It’s okay, Anth. I think you were having a nightmare. You alright?” Matt asked me and pushed some buttons on the machines behind me.

  “I’m fine. Sydney’s safe. Stop pushing the button, Matt. I don’t need any more medication.”

  I think it was my nightmare in addition to Matt bringing it up that was turning me defensive. That or the fucking medicine. Fuck, my chest ached, I was freezing and I felt sick to my stomach. My stomach dropped when I saw off to the side of the room was Will and Chris. Will was friends with Victor and I couldn’t help but wonder if he knew the details about that evening. I was going to throw up.

  “Bathroom, Anth?” Matt cautiously asked me. It was like the throw up feeling was written on my face.

  I o
nly nodded and let him help me up. When I got to the bathroom I tried to shut the door behind me but Matt came in with me. I didn’t have time to argue with him before I doubled over and threw up. I could feel his hands on my back as I got sick and suddenly my head was full of shit from Victor. I tried shrugging Matt’s hands off me and was so consumed by the pain in my stomach that I finally stopped worrying about him.

  I stopped throwing up but still felt dizzy and now my head was throbbing. I leaned my back against the wall and slid down to a crouching position, hoping my head would stop spinning. I didn’t want to go back into the room with everyone in there. I didn’t want anyone to see me like this. I shut my eyes and jumped when I felt Matt’s hand on my arm. I looked up at him and could tell that he was worried. I needed to pull it together.

  “When will I stop getting sick to my stomach, Matt?”

  “Usually the nausea that’s associated with the anesthetics wears off soon after the surgery. In your case, I think it’s a combination of the anesthetics and medication. It’s a lot and you haven’t been eating nearly what you should be. You’ve had some other shit going on too. Just give it time, Anthony.”

  Jesus. I hoped that Matt wouldn’t bring up the other shit. I couldn’t think about that right now. He passed me a cool washcloth and I held it against my forehead. I didn’t feel like talking or seeing anyone. If I could just hide out here in the bathroom that would have been fine by me, but I knew it wasn’t an option. Maybe I could just stay there until Matt’s folks, Will, Chris and Gina left. It’s not that I don’t appreciate them and what they’ve done for us, but I really felt like I needed a little seclusion for a while. Matt crouched down on the floor next to me.

  “Anthony, talk to me.”

  No, no, no. I shut my eyes to hide. I tried sending my mind anywhere where I didn’t have to talk or think of Victor or what I had done in the woods. I swallowed past the pain I felt in my throat and made a face. Matt said it was from the tube that was down my throat during surgery and the ventilator, but that the pain would go away within a few days.

  I didn’t even get partially upright before Matt had his hands on my arms to help me. I moved to the sink almost on my own and washed my face and brushed my teeth. I at least looked a little better.

  “Am I allowed to leave the room yet?” I asked Matt.

  “Where is it you want to go?”

  “Just down the hall or outside. Fucking anywhere.” I needed some space.

  That outburst was too much and now Matt was cautiously eyeing me and assessing me. I hated that. If I left the bathroom, I’d be under the microscope with Chris or Matt’s dad. Oh, and then there was Will. And Blake. I needed to man up and find my balls, for Christ’s sake. I blew the head off of sadistic abductor and was scared to face my family. What the fuck was that about?

  I was nearly sick again with worry over what the repercussions of my actions in the woods would be. Was I going to be charged with something? Would I get locked up? Does Colin know? Would he keep me from seeing Sydney and kick me the hell out of our home? Was I going to lose her because of what I did? Paul could have killed me though. I stared down the end of his revolver.

  Fucking hell.

  I couldn’t breathe and my chest and stomach were killing me.

  “Anthony, calm down. You’re okay, but have got to relax. Come on, let me help you back to bed.”

  I slowly moved around Matt and opened the bathroom door to a flurry of voices and made my way to the bed. Blake came over to help but I held my hand up so he wouldn’t help me. I need to start doing simple things on my own. By the time I got to the bed, I felt winded and began coughing. This of course brought Dr. Reid over and he began attaching me to machines.

  “I’m going to ask them to increase the dosage of the medication to help with your upset stomach,” Matt said.

  Matt had a stethoscope against my chest and was listening to my heart and breathing while I was listening to my own heart rate via the monitor and staring at the floor. My bed dipped and an arm wrapped around my back to my shoulder and I froze. It wasn’t Matt’s or Blake’s and I looked up and saw Colin rocking Sydney in the chair. It was Will.

  I fucking didn’t want anyone touching me except for Sydney or Colin. I could barely tolerate Matt and Blake touching me. Not Will. I tried to keep calm but that fucking heart monitor had to make a scene. Matt still had the stethoscope on my chest and when I looked in his eyes, I could tell that he noticed my heart was pounding. I gave him a quick shake of my head, hoping he’d drop it or not say anything.

  “You hanging in there, Graves?” Will asked me.

  I quickly thought back to that mistake of an evening that I left Colin’s, got drunk and paid Will’s sadist pal to administer some pain. Will knew that I had called Victor that night. I don’t know what Victor told Will or really what Will might have told Blake. Blake was certainly curious enough to poke his nose around. I quickly glanced over at Blake. He was sitting near Chris watching me. Too many fucking eyes on me.

  I pushed Matt’s hand away that held the stethoscope and pulled the device from my finger, which effectively stopped the beeping noise from the monitor. There, no one gets to assess me now. I smiled at Matt when I got his “you’re so immature” glare.

  “I’m fine, Will.”

  “Matt,”

  One word coming from Colin was like the gavel coming down. All eyes whirled around in the room to Colin but his eyes were focused on mine now as he spoke.

  “I think Sydney and Anthony could use some time to just relax,” Colin said to everyone.

  No one challenged Colin and everyone began filing out. Blake waited for Will and then he gave me a pat on my leg when Will moved off the bed.

  “Rest up, Anthony. I will be by to see you and Sydney in the morning,” Blake said, and then left.

  The room was quiet now and Colin brought Sydney over to sit with me on my bed. I was eager to hold Sydney and loved how it felt for her to wrap her arm across me with her head on my shoulder.

  Colin had a funny look in his eye. It was as if he was trying to convey something to me without coming right out and saying it. My mind was too tired to play games so I raised my eyebrow at him. From his pocket, he pulled Sydney’s collar and my heart began to race.

  Yes! We needed to put that back on our girl. I sat up and nudged Sydney so she’d sit up. I nodded at Colin and guided Sydney to sit in the middle of my bed between my legs. She was sitting sideways and couldn’t see Colin because her back was to him, but she thought she was causing me pain by leaning on me.

  “I’m sorry, Sir. I hope I didn’t hurt you. I just wanted to be close to you,” Sydney said quickly.

  “You’re not hurting me, sunshine. I want you to sit here so I can wrap my arms around you. Colin and I need to do something.”

  Her reaction to what I said was not something I was prepared for and it made my chest hurt.

  “I’m sorry! Please don’t get rid of me, I’ll do better. I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention and Paul got me…I’m sorry.”

  It tore me into a million pieces and she began shaking and crying about us getting rid of her. I didn’t even know how to react or what to say, but she was falling apart in my arms. Colin sat on the bed and took her hands in his, then pressed his lips to her forehead.

  “Baby, relax…shh, calm down. We don’t blame you for anything and you’re not at fault for any of this. We love you so much and aren’t getting rid of you.”

  Colin opened his hand that held the collar and Sydney was surprised. She thought her collar was gone and that she had forever lost it. Colin undid the clasp on the necklace and handed me one side and together we attached it around her neck. I kissed the spot on her neck where the necklace lay against her skin. I realized my eyes were watery as I stared at the marks and bruising on her back. I turned my head to the side, facing away from Sydney and Colin and let my head rest against Sydney’s back gently. I closed my eyes and felt moisture escape, so I quickly pressed my e
yes against her pajamas to soak up the tears. I took as deep of a breath as I could, which wasn’t very deep, and tightened my grip on her.

  “Anth, you should lie back. Rest, man.”

  I opened my eyes and Matt was standing in front of me. I shook my head hoping to fend off anymore tears. I don’t know why I was feeling so emotional. I couldn’t explain it and didn’t understand it, so naturally I tried hiding it.

  “I just want…” I quickly shut my mouth when I realized my voice was breaking.

  It made matters worse for me emotionally at the moment, when my voice began breaking, Sydney squeezed my arm. My inability to take a deep breath surprised me when I had attempted another deep breath and a cough came out.

  “I want to hold her,” I managed to say and tightened my arms around her abdomen.

  “Lie back. Sydney can rest with you. She needs to stretch out some.” Matt said as Colin was slowly pulling her from my arms.

  I flopped backward against my pillow and my arms quickly consumed Sydney. I was allowed to hold her until my eyes started to get tired. Sydney was asleep and even though I expressed that I wanted to hold her longer, Matt said that Sydney needed to be able to lie down and stretch out. He explained she has been cramping badly, but it’s lessened some. I passed her back to Colin and instantly felt cold when he took her from my arms. I let Matt hook me back up to the machines and got ready to hopefully have an uneventful nap.

  Chapter 10

  Thursday January 30th

  Sydney

  This morning after breakfast, Colin and Matt said I could go for a walk if I wanted to. I wanted to go for the walk, but didn’t want to go alone.

  “I…will one of you come too?”

  They were smiling and laughing. Why were they laughing? I didn’t want to be alone. I frowned and looked at Anthony. He was asleep still. He sleeps a lot right now, but Matt said it’s a combination of the medicine and his body’s way of healing.